[Icon ID: A yellow-gradient waning crescent moon. Between the two points of the crescent is a purple-gradient key. The background is a dark blue circle. /end ID]
If you are having a bad day: #nil desperandum
Topics oft-discussed at La Canta Magnifico Blog:
Essays (especially on the below topics)
#F1 (particularly #Charles Leclerc, Team Silverstone (#Aston Martin / #Racing Point / #Force India / #Spyker / #Midland / #Jordan), and #Jules Bianchi).
#motorsport (notably #motorsport safety, #FIA, #Giancarlo Fisichella and #lm24 )
#game development (mostly #interactive fiction)
#communication (including #writing and #information literacy)
#image description and #video description of some other people's posts (primarily F1)
The majority of my imaged/videoed posts prior to August 2024 are not image/audio described. If you would like any particular older posts transcribing/image describing, please tell me.
Oh Julio, I wrote to you exactly a year ago today from my old blog and i really canāt believe it has already been a year since you were taken away; I still think of you everyday and oddly enough to some people i live each day with you in and on my mind. Your fight to the very end inspires me everyday to fight for what i want in life and continuously stay strong. You never gave up, you fought your way through the various motorsport categories and then fought for your dream of becoming a WC in F1.Ā You werenāt in a front running car but still you gave it your all and achieved an incredible P9 in Monaco which many people had deemed to be impossible, but you did it. And with them now officially āManor Racingā, you are the only and will be the only ever person to ever score points for Marussia, and thats one of many achievements that you deserve. After your accident in Suzuka you fought mercifully for your life, 10 months is an incredible amount of time to be fighting for your life but you never seemed to give up. Unfortunately the realms of life ended up being too much and you were taken from us. But throughout your motorsport career you fought for what you deserved, you gained what you deserved in lower categories and were destined for incredible things in F1. And for that i salute you.
āI want to do all that i can to become world champion, and if i canāt iāll be happy if i died tryingā - Jules BianchiĀ
āRacing drivers never die. Their spirits are too strong and they never go awayā - Sir Jackie Stewartā
2 years. 2 years without you Julio and i have no words to describe just how much i miss you. It still physically hurts that youāre gone.
Despite missing you beyond words you still hold the ability to cheer me up (ironically enough i know itāll be you to cheer me up today when iām feeling so low), you still inspire me everyday with your fighting spirit and ability to just keep going on with that smile of yours which is still truly infectious.
This one is the hardest so far. Itās getting worse. I donāt know why.
This year has been insane and you would be so freaking proud of it all!
Weāve had success with the foundation in funding a modified bed for patients with brain injuries.
Weāve had the introduction of the halo, and as ugly as it is J - it seems to of assisted in lessening injuries of drivers caught up in crashes. Itās serving us well.
The French GP returned and as hard as it was because you should of been there - you werenāt forgotten in any stretch of the word. The ladies still love you!
How has it been 4 years since you were taken? How has it been nearly 5 years since we last saw that smile? Watched you drive a great race in a box of bolts? Heard you make jokes and wind up everyone with no repercussions because you had a mega poker face and an endearing mischievous innocence to you.
Still to this day nobody has anything bad to say about you. If we do talk about you in the negative then itās about how we miss you and wish you didnāt have to go.
Everyone is doing so amazing. Iām sure youāre together with Herve, albeit shouting about shitty Ferrari strategies but most importantly continuing to guide Charles, Arthur, Lorenzo, Tommy and Melanie who are, together with your parents, making the most of life and living it up with you still in mind.
I still think about you everyday and itās not just because youāre still my phone home screen. I wonder what youād be up to, where youād be, whether weād still be friends with all thatās going on in the world. I hope we would be, i believe we would be.
The second i woke up and saw the date, the pain hit me like a ton of bricks all over again.
Itās not that i didnāt care. Itās that i didnāt want to care. I couldnāt let myself accept that itās been so fucking long. That the date keeps getting further away from when we last saw you. I couldnāt allow myself to face it. I donāt want to face it. So if itās ok with you, i wonāt. For this year, iām going to pretend you did a Nico Rosberg. Raced in a top team, letās go Ferrari because you were going there anyways and by god do they need some good publicity even if it is fake, you won a championship or two, maybe alongside Charles, took a big fucking pay check and said peace out motherfuckers iām going to live the life of a billionaire and spend my days drinking wine and sunbathing on a yacht off a private island.
I may not of let myself accept it until now but i still really fucking miss you and it hurts so much that youāre not here.
I love you shit head, always.
.p.s THE HALO SAVED ROMAIN GROSJEANS LIFE AND AS HARD AS IT IS TO SAY, THANK YOU FOR LEAVING A LEGACY THAT HAS TIME AND TIME AGAIN SAVED LIVES. HIS KIDS HAVE A FATHER, HIS WIFE A HUSBAND, HIS PARENTS THEIR CHILD. YOU REMAIN SO IMPORTANT AND WE MISS YOU.
Seven years. Seven whole ass years man. When did time start going so damn fast? How are we already at 7 years?
Julio. Bro. Iāve tried writing this so many times and i keep selfishly circling back to this one thought. Iām well aware of how bananas it is and letās be honest itās nothing new from me is it so just hold with it, itāll make sense eventually. I hope. lol.
A few weeks ago i realised i was stopping myself thinking about when i met you. When i first heard your name. When i first saw you race. When i jokingly promised you iād give racing a chance and watch you climb to Formula 1 all those years ago. I donāt think i can face it. I canāt face it because iām scared itāll confirm that this year will mark you having been gone for longer than i knew you. You were such a massive part of my life for so many years. You were my guy, my number one. Iād never had a favourite athlete, a favourite driver or even a favourite team. You became that. You are that. My driver was you, my team was your team, we won together, we lost together. I was a big time JB fangirl. To be fair my childhood friends were too, except their JB fan-girling was of the Justin Bieber variety and well they were fools, the lot of them.
Youāre still the only sports person iāve ever had as my number one and now youāve nearly been āout of my lifeā for longer than you were in it and itās kind of freaking me out.
I of course donāt know why. Nothing has changed this last 7 years. I still see your smiling face and find great joy and happiness in the memories you created for so many of us whilst experience such heartache of you not being here when you deserved so much to be. Itās like my brain is telling me that the last 7 years without you have taken up the whole of the memories from when you were here. 7 years of happy memories to cope with 7 years of loss, what happens as we rush toward the 8th? Believe me i know, i know it makes absolutely no sense. Especially since your legacy is thriving. Your name and memory is linked to so many amazing things and you continue to light up so many lives. The association, your family, the drive for safer races, the halo.
Every single day there is a reason to smile because of something that is linked to you. I mean we could be getting ourselves a few champions this year out of your friends and loved ones and you would be so damn happy. Youāve also yet again helped in saving a whole load of lives alongside your family and association who too continue to strive in empowering and helping those facing TBIās.
The Bianchi legacy is amazing.
You, your family, your friends, competitors, teams, fans. Everyone who continue to hold you in their heart and fulfil their lives with the honour of having had you grace their lives. Your impact on this world was and continues to be stratospheric.
You truly are always remembered, sorely missed and forever loved.
You live on in so many people and nothing brings me more joy than seeing your family and friends thrive, love and live their lives to the fullest with you always by their side.
Damn. Eight years. If weāre just talking years, youāve officially been gone longer than i knew you. 7 years supporting you, 8 years to the day without you. Still here though arenāt i. Still supporting you and everything you were, are and will become. Always
I donāt know where this one will go Jules. It was going to be a good one, a happy one because from a personal point of view, the last few years have freaked me out with how long itās been and how i was feeling about it but then i got here, on the 8th anniversary (well nearly, itās the 16th and iām watching FE which will explain why this one is a tale of two halves - i always write these a few days in advance bc i ignore the day as much as possible) and well, i really fucking miss you and it hurts. Itās mad that iām glad it hurts in a way but as per the last few letters, i was scared i didnāt care. I knew i did, i felt i did but i was scared i was forgetting you. I wasnāt. I havenāt. Unlucky for you.
So yes, back to business. It was supposed to be good, then FRECA went to Spa. It was going to be bad, so bad. Then weāre here in Rome with FE and weāre brought this tale of two halves.
That sounds crazy as it is before you realise just how meant to be it was. Iāve supported Charlesā career since you were still here, iāve stuck around with him and stayed with F1 until he got to Ferrari (and yes when he gets a shot at the title, iāll turn up like these other fake fan trophy hunters and support him like i never left lol) but lad you know i was only ever really there for you and then for him and i just canāt do it. Weāve been through this all before though and the whole point of what iām trying to say is that i never really see Charles without linking him back to you and your family and me thinking of you having a hand in his win seems like me projecting and shoe horning you in like all these clout chasing TikTok girlies do (I do fight them, i promise and iām reliably informed this here site isnāt happy with them either)
But with the date, the history of how it happened, 10 years being a significant anniversary date, it being very nearly 7 years since his dad passed (adding that together you get 17)
It truly feels like it was written in the stars with you as the author.
How are we possibly here already. 10 years. Where has the time gone.
Iāve written this so many times i canāt even keep track anymore. Iāll let you in on a secret, all of these other letters, bar the first ever one on my last blog that i wrote the day you passed, have been written a bit in advance. Yes theyāre unedited and posted on a timer because even now, every anniversary gets me all over the shop but still they get done at least the day before. This one? Itās literally Thursday the 17th of July 2025. Itās midday and iām properly struggling. I can only assume itās because of how significant that 10 year anniversary feels. Maybe itās because i made a finalising point in that first letter (i hate that i deleted it, now would be a great time to re read it and react huh) about the 10th anniversary.
I pointed out the 1st year, then the 2nd, then the fifth and then i wondered about the 10th. That was the big number, the years and years and years in the future, a time inconceivable and far away. Yet here we are and iām drowning? I just donāt know how we got here when it still feels like yesterday we were watching you on the drivers parade sheltering from the rain. 10 years is just scary man.
I guess the big thing i can remember from that 1st letter is me questioning what it would all mean. There was so much why you, why your wonderful family, why, why, why. It couldnāt just mean nothing. You and your lovely lovely family didnāt deserve this. You couldnāt just be a name in the past,
Good thing, youāre not. Youāre still so remembered and your legacy lives on.
Youāve literally saved lives. When things inevitably go wrong #FIAthings people still say your name and how we promised weād never let what happened to you happen to anyone else and thus hold these people to account and make them get their act together. Obviously following your passing they finally got their arses in gear and brought in the Halo and Indyscreens (canāt think of their name rn oops) and together with those who too lost their lives in the name of this sport, have encouraged the safety and life saving of so so so many other drivers. Your wonderful family and all their work in the rehabilitation of other people thrust into the brain injury world. Thatās because of you. Despite not getting to that point, they recognised what would be your life had the injury not taken you and they know how important that is for other families and getting their loved one back to living a fullfilled life. I love them lol.
11 years and no proper āletterā. I donāt want it to be misconstrude, this isnāt about you not mattering or me forgetting you. I have the excuse that I couldnāt get on my Tumblr today but usually I do have one written out and scheduled, today I didnāt. Itās 22:31 as I write this so iām still in time!
I think you just mean more than writing a poxy letter to on social media. It started when I was 16 years old, that first one on the day you died? my God was it a mess! Iām 27 now and it feels juvenile and weird.. back then I followed you like my school friends followed Justin Bieber and One Direction and writing to you was a way to let out my thoughts and keep the connection to you that iād built, it kepts going and here we are
Maybe this will be technically be the last one, Iād not be surprised if it was, who knows
Just know that you mean the same to me now as you did then. I still remember you. I still dread this date (and 05/10) and remember you so often itās unbelievable.
I never had to worry or put effort into trying, i could never forget you or the love I held for you then and still do now.
I know I will miss you always and never forget you.
Wherever you are I hope youāre resting in peace and are proud of those you love.
The same photo as the top-left photo from "A letter to Julio - Four years onā¦" (Recap: A set of red-and-yellow karts lined up on a race track on a cloudy day. Some children are sitting in the other karts, but the front one (which has number 35 in black on its yellow number plate) instead has a mostly-yellow helmet on it, near its front-right wheel. Behind the karts are a row of children and their engineers. The left-most child is Charles Leclerc (a child with fringed dark brown hair and eyes), who is standing and smiling at the camera. He is wearing a mostly-red overall with a yellow stripe. To his right is Jules Bianchi, also standing and facing the camera, with crossed arms, wearing bright red T-shirt and shorts.)
Above "A letter to Julio - Ten years onā¦"
The same photo as the top-left photo from "A letter to Jules - One year onā¦" (Recap: An open-top two-seat white car with light blue stripe along the top, on a race track. Inside, on the left is a balding man with black hair and black round glasses. On the right, Jules Bianchi (a young man with dark brown hair and eyes), wearing a red coat, face scrunched up in annoyance at the heavy rain. He is holding a large red Marussia umbrella.)
Above "A letter to Julio - Eleven years onā¦"
Jules Bianchi, smiling in a white base layer, raises a finger in celebration. The sky is almost clear apart from some fluffy clouds. Some Silverstone grandstands are in the background.
/end ID part 3 of 3]
Oh Julio, I wrote to you exactly a year ago today from my old blog and i really canāt believe it has already been a year since you were taken away; I still think of you everyday and oddly enough to some people i live each day with you in and on my mind. Your fight to the very end inspires me everyday to fight for what i want in life and continuously stay strong. You never gave up, you fought your way through the various motorsport categories and then fought for your dream of becoming a WC in F1.Ā You werenāt in a front running car but still you gave it your all and achieved an incredible P9 in Monaco which many people had deemed to be impossible, but you did it. And with them now officially āManor Racingā, you are the only and will be the only ever person to ever score points for Marussia, and thats one of many achievements that you deserve. After your accident in Suzuka you fought mercifully for your life, 10 months is an incredible amount of time to be fighting for your life but you never seemed to give up. Unfortunately the realms of life ended up being too much and you were taken from us. But throughout your motorsport career you fought for what you deserved, you gained what you deserved in lower categories and were destined for incredible things in F1. And for that i salute you.
āI want to do all that i can to become world champion, and if i canāt iāll be happy if i died tryingā - Jules BianchiĀ
āRacing drivers never die. Their spirits are too strong and they never go awayā - Sir Jackie Stewartā
2 years. 2 years without you Julio and i have no words to describe just how much i miss you. It still physically hurts that youāre gone.
Despite missing you beyond words you still hold the ability to cheer me up (ironically enough i know itāll be you to cheer me up today when iām feeling so low), you still inspire me everyday with your fighting spirit and ability to just keep going on with that smile of yours which is still truly infectious.
This one is the hardest so far. Itās getting worse. I donāt know why.
This year has been insane and you would be so freaking proud of it all!
Weāve had success with the foundation in funding a modified bed for patients with brain injuries.
Weāve had the introduction of the halo, and as ugly as it is J - it seems to of assisted in lessening injuries of drivers caught up in crashes. Itās serving us well.
The French GP returned and as hard as it was because you should of been there - you werenāt forgotten in any stretch of the word. The ladies still love you!
How has it been 4 years since you were taken? How has it been nearly 5 years since we last saw that smile? Watched you drive a great race in a box of bolts? Heard you make jokes and wind up everyone with no repercussions because you had a mega poker face and an endearing mischievous innocence to you.
Still to this day nobody has anything bad to say about you. If we do talk about you in the negative then itās about how we miss you and wish you didnāt have to go.
Everyone is doing so amazing. Iām sure youāre together with Herve, albeit shouting about shitty Ferrari strategies but most importantly continuing to guide Charles, Arthur, Lorenzo, Tommy and Melanie who are, together with your parents, making the most of life and living it up with you still in mind.
I still think about you everyday and itās not just because youāre still my phone home screen. I wonder what youād be up to, where youād be, whether weād still be friends with all thatās going on in the world. I hope we would be, i believe we would be.
The second i woke up and saw the date, the pain hit me like a ton of bricks all over again.
Itās not that i didnāt care. Itās that i didnāt want to care. I couldnāt let myself accept that itās been so fucking long. That the date keeps getting further away from when we last saw you. I couldnāt allow myself to face it. I donāt want to face it. So if itās ok with you, i wonāt. For this year, iām going to pretend you did a Nico Rosberg. Raced in a top team, letās go Ferrari because you were going there anyways and by god do they need some good publicity even if it is fake, you won a championship or two, maybe alongside Charles, took a big fucking pay check and said peace out motherfuckers iām going to live the life of a billionaire and spend my days drinking wine and sunbathing on a yacht off a private island.
I may not of let myself accept it until now but i still really fucking miss you and it hurts so much that youāre not here.
I love you shit head, always.
.p.s THE HALO SAVED ROMAIN GROSJEANS LIFE AND AS HARD AS IT IS TO SAY, THANK YOU FOR LEAVING A LEGACY THAT HAS TIME AND TIME AGAIN SAVED LIVES. HIS KIDS HAVE A FATHER, HIS WIFE A HUSBAND, HIS PARENTS THEIR CHILD. YOU REMAIN SO IMPORTANT AND WE MISS YOU.
Seven years. Seven whole ass years man. When did time start going so damn fast? How are we already at 7 years?
Julio. Bro. Iāve tried writing this so many times and i keep selfishly circling back to this one thought. Iām well aware of how bananas it is and letās be honest itās nothing new from me is it so just hold with it, itāll make sense eventually. I hope. lol.
A few weeks ago i realised i was stopping myself thinking about when i met you. When i first heard your name. When i first saw you race. When i jokingly promised you iād give racing a chance and watch you climb to Formula 1 all those years ago. I donāt think i can face it. I canāt face it because iām scared itāll confirm that this year will mark you having been gone for longer than i knew you. You were such a massive part of my life for so many years. You were my guy, my number one. Iād never had a favourite athlete, a favourite driver or even a favourite team. You became that. You are that. My driver was you, my team was your team, we won together, we lost together. I was a big time JB fangirl. To be fair my childhood friends were too, except their JB fan-girling was of the Justin Bieber variety and well they were fools, the lot of them.
Youāre still the only sports person iāve ever had as my number one and now youāve nearly been āout of my lifeā for longer than you were in it and itās kind of freaking me out.
I of course donāt know why. Nothing has changed this last 7 years. I still see your smiling face and find great joy and happiness in the memories you created for so many of us whilst experience such heartache of you not being here when you deserved so much to be. Itās like my brain is telling me that the last 7 years without you have taken up the whole of the memories from when you were here. 7 years of happy memories to cope with 7 years of loss, what happens as we rush toward the 8th? Believe me i know, i know it makes absolutely no sense. Especially since your legacy is thriving. Your name and memory is linked to so many amazing things and you continue to light up so many lives. The association, your family, the drive for safer races, the halo.
Every single day there is a reason to smile because of something that is linked to you. I mean we could be getting ourselves a few champions this year out of your friends and loved ones and you would be so damn happy. Youāve also yet again helped in saving a whole load of lives alongside your family and association who too continue to strive in empowering and helping those facing TBIās.
The Bianchi legacy is amazing.
You, your family, your friends, competitors, teams, fans. Everyone who continue to hold you in their heart and fulfil their lives with the honour of having had you grace their lives. Your impact on this world was and continues to be stratospheric.
You truly are always remembered, sorely missed and forever loved.
You live on in so many people and nothing brings me more joy than seeing your family and friends thrive, love and live their lives to the fullest with you always by their side.
Damn. Eight years. If weāre just talking years, youāve officially been gone longer than i knew you. 7 years supporting you, 8 years to the day without you. Still here though arenāt i. Still supporting you and everything you were, are and will become. Always
I donāt know where this one will go Jules. It was going to be a good one, a happy one because from a personal point of view, the last few years have freaked me out with how long itās been and how i was feeling about it but then i got here, on the 8th anniversary (well nearly, itās the 16th and iām watching FE which will explain why this one is a tale of two halves - i always write these a few days in advance bc i ignore the day as much as possible) and well, i really fucking miss you and it hurts. Itās mad that iām glad it hurts in a way but as per the last few letters, i was scared i didnāt care. I knew i did, i felt i did but i was scared i was forgetting you. I wasnāt. I havenāt. Unlucky for you.
So yes, back to business. It was supposed to be good, then FRECA went to Spa. It was going to be bad, so bad. Then weāre here in Rome with FE and weāre brought this tale of two halves.
That sounds crazy as it is before you realise just how meant to be it was. Iāve supported Charlesā career since you were still here, iāve stuck around with him and stayed with F1 until he got to Ferrari (and yes when he gets a shot at the title, iāll turn up like these other fake fan trophy hunters and support him like i never left lol) but lad you know i was only ever really there for you and then for him and i just canāt do it. Weāve been through this all before though and the whole point of what iām trying to say is that i never really see Charles without linking him back to you and your family and me thinking of you having a hand in his win seems like me projecting and shoe horning you in like all these clout chasing TikTok girlies do (I do fight them, i promise and iām reliably informed this here site isnāt happy with them either)
But with the date, the history of how it happened, 10 years being a significant anniversary date, it being very nearly 7 years since his dad passed (adding that together you get 17)
It truly feels like it was written in the stars with you as the author.
How are we possibly here already. 10 years. Where has the time gone.
Iāve written this so many times i canāt even keep track anymore. Iāll let you in on a secret, all of these other letters, bar the first ever one on my last blog that i wrote the day you passed, have been written a bit in advance. Yes theyāre unedited and posted on a timer because even now, every anniversary gets me all over the shop but still they get done at least the day before. This one? Itās literally Thursday the 17th of July 2025. Itās midday and iām properly struggling. I can only assume itās because of how significant that 10 year anniversary feels. Maybe itās because i made a finalising point in that first letter (i hate that i deleted it, now would be a great time to re read it and react huh) about the 10th anniversary.
I pointed out the 1st year, then the 2nd, then the fifth and then i wondered about the 10th. That was the big number, the years and years and years in the future, a time inconceivable and far away. Yet here we are and iām drowning? I just donāt know how we got here when it still feels like yesterday we were watching you on the drivers parade sheltering from the rain. 10 years is just scary man.
I guess the big thing i can remember from that 1st letter is me questioning what it would all mean. There was so much why you, why your wonderful family, why, why, why. It couldnāt just mean nothing. You and your lovely lovely family didnāt deserve this. You couldnāt just be a name in the past,
Good thing, youāre not. Youāre still so remembered and your legacy lives on.
Youāve literally saved lives. When things inevitably go wrong #FIAthings people still say your name and how we promised weād never let what happened to you happen to anyone else and thus hold these people to account and make them get their act together. Obviously following your passing they finally got their arses in gear and brought in the Halo and Indyscreens (canāt think of their name rn oops) and together with those who too lost their lives in the name of this sport, have encouraged the safety and life saving of so so so many other drivers. Your wonderful family and all their work in the rehabilitation of other people thrust into the brain injury world. Thatās because of you. Despite not getting to that point, they recognised what would be your life had the injury not taken you and they know how important that is for other families and getting their loved one back to living a fullfilled life. I love them lol.
11 years and no proper āletterā. I donāt want it to be misconstrude, this isnāt about you not mattering or me forgetting you. I have the excuse that I couldnāt get on my Tumblr today but usually I do have one written out and scheduled, today I didnāt. Itās 22:31 as I write this so iām still in time!
I think you just mean more than writing a poxy letter to on social media. It started when I was 16 years old, that first one on the day you died? my God was it a mess! Iām 27 now and it feels juvenile and weird.. back then I followed you like my school friends followed Justin Bieber and One Direction and writing to you was a way to let out my thoughts and keep the connection to you that iād built, it kepts going and here we are
Maybe this will be technically be the last one, Iād not be surprised if it was, who knows
Just know that you mean the same to me now as you did then. I still remember you. I still dread this date (and 05/10) and remember you so often itās unbelievable.
I never had to worry or put effort into trying, i could never forget you or the love I held for you then and still do now.
I know I will miss you always and never forget you.
Wherever you are I hope youāre resting in peace and are proud of those you love.
A photo of Jules Bianchi, with a small frown, wearing a red Marussia jacket with white highlights, a yellow on-ear microphone, a black fitness tracker and an oversized black watch with red highlights. The background is blue and purple.
Above "A letter to Julio - Six years onā¦"
A photo of Jules Bianchi, with a neutral expression and particularly tidy hair, wearing white Marussia racing overalls with a red collar. The white and grey of the Marussia motorhome's side is in the background.
Above "A letter to Julio - Seven years onā¦"
A set of 2 photos:
Left photo: Jules Bianchi, in red-and-white Ferrari winter gear and a bright red woolly hat, looking at the camera and gently smiling. He is sitting on a reddish-orange Ducati MotoGP bike that is pointing to the bottom-right corner. There are a lot of blue and pink triangles on a gold base on the wall in the background.
Right photo: Jules Bianchi, looking to his right side and laughing. He is wearing a white long-sleeved fireproof base layer with Marussia sponsors written in black, a pair of black earphones with a dangling connection cable and a black bracelet with a small conical silvery ornament. There is a blurred pit lane in the background. /photo set complete
Above "A letter to Julio - Eight years onā¦"
A set of 3 photos:
Top-left photo: A chequered-flag pattern on a race track. One of the white squares has a faint "Ciao Jules" written in it.
Top-right photo: Jules Bianchi, looking to his left, with his left thumb and tip of his left forefinger resting on a spot just under his right ear. He has a subtle crooked smile partially compensated for by the tilt of his head. He is wearing a red Marussia jacket with white piping.
Bottom photo: A red-carpeted walkway on a track, lined with people (photographers in blue jackets and beige trousers at the front, then someone in a blue shirt and dark shorts, then some women in white T-shirts, short black skirts and black high heels. The women are applauding.
Towards the front of the middle of the walkway is Jules Bianchi, carrying a small camera. He has a serious expression and is looking straight ahead. He is wearing a red Marussia shirt with white piping, black trousers and light striped trainers. Behind him are Pastor Maldonado (on the left, wearing a black baseball cap, black Lotus shirt with gold piping, jeans and blue trainers) and Felipe Massa (to Pastor's right, wearing a white Williams baseball cap, white Williams shirt with dark blue and red stripe to the right, black shorts and white trainers). /photo set complete
/end ID part 2 of 3]
Oh Julio, I wrote to you exactly a year ago today from my old blog and i really canāt believe it has already been a year since you were taken away; I still think of you everyday and oddly enough to some people i live each day with you in and on my mind. Your fight to the very end inspires me everyday to fight for what i want in life and continuously stay strong. You never gave up, you fought your way through the various motorsport categories and then fought for your dream of becoming a WC in F1.Ā You werenāt in a front running car but still you gave it your all and achieved an incredible P9 in Monaco which many people had deemed to be impossible, but you did it. And with them now officially āManor Racingā, you are the only and will be the only ever person to ever score points for Marussia, and thats one of many achievements that you deserve. After your accident in Suzuka you fought mercifully for your life, 10 months is an incredible amount of time to be fighting for your life but you never seemed to give up. Unfortunately the realms of life ended up being too much and you were taken from us. But throughout your motorsport career you fought for what you deserved, you gained what you deserved in lower categories and were destined for incredible things in F1. And for that i salute you.
āI want to do all that i can to become world champion, and if i canāt iāll be happy if i died tryingā - Jules BianchiĀ
āRacing drivers never die. Their spirits are too strong and they never go awayā - Sir Jackie Stewartā
2 years. 2 years without you Julio and i have no words to describe just how much i miss you. It still physically hurts that youāre gone.
Despite missing you beyond words you still hold the ability to cheer me up (ironically enough i know itāll be you to cheer me up today when iām feeling so low), you still inspire me everyday with your fighting spirit and ability to just keep going on with that smile of yours which is still truly infectious.
This one is the hardest so far. Itās getting worse. I donāt know why.
This year has been insane and you would be so freaking proud of it all!
Weāve had success with the foundation in funding a modified bed for patients with brain injuries.
Weāve had the introduction of the halo, and as ugly as it is J - it seems to of assisted in lessening injuries of drivers caught up in crashes. Itās serving us well.
The French GP returned and as hard as it was because you should of been there - you werenāt forgotten in any stretch of the word. The ladies still love you!
How has it been 4 years since you were taken? How has it been nearly 5 years since we last saw that smile? Watched you drive a great race in a box of bolts? Heard you make jokes and wind up everyone with no repercussions because you had a mega poker face and an endearing mischievous innocence to you.
Still to this day nobody has anything bad to say about you. If we do talk about you in the negative then itās about how we miss you and wish you didnāt have to go.
Everyone is doing so amazing. Iām sure youāre together with Herve, albeit shouting about shitty Ferrari strategies but most importantly continuing to guide Charles, Arthur, Lorenzo, Tommy and Melanie who are, together with your parents, making the most of life and living it up with you still in mind.
I still think about you everyday and itās not just because youāre still my phone home screen. I wonder what youād be up to, where youād be, whether weād still be friends with all thatās going on in the world. I hope we would be, i believe we would be.
The second i woke up and saw the date, the pain hit me like a ton of bricks all over again.
Itās not that i didnāt care. Itās that i didnāt want to care. I couldnāt let myself accept that itās been so fucking long. That the date keeps getting further away from when we last saw you. I couldnāt allow myself to face it. I donāt want to face it. So if itās ok with you, i wonāt. For this year, iām going to pretend you did a Nico Rosberg. Raced in a top team, letās go Ferrari because you were going there anyways and by god do they need some good publicity even if it is fake, you won a championship or two, maybe alongside Charles, took a big fucking pay check and said peace out motherfuckers iām going to live the life of a billionaire and spend my days drinking wine and sunbathing on a yacht off a private island.
I may not of let myself accept it until now but i still really fucking miss you and it hurts so much that youāre not here.
I love you shit head, always.
.p.s THE HALO SAVED ROMAIN GROSJEANS LIFE AND AS HARD AS IT IS TO SAY, THANK YOU FOR LEAVING A LEGACY THAT HAS TIME AND TIME AGAIN SAVED LIVES. HIS KIDS HAVE A FATHER, HIS WIFE A HUSBAND, HIS PARENTS THEIR CHILD. YOU REMAIN SO IMPORTANT AND WE MISS YOU.
Seven years. Seven whole ass years man. When did time start going so damn fast? How are we already at 7 years?
Julio. Bro. Iāve tried writing this so many times and i keep selfishly circling back to this one thought. Iām well aware of how bananas it is and letās be honest itās nothing new from me is it so just hold with it, itāll make sense eventually. I hope. lol.
A few weeks ago i realised i was stopping myself thinking about when i met you. When i first heard your name. When i first saw you race. When i jokingly promised you iād give racing a chance and watch you climb to Formula 1 all those years ago. I donāt think i can face it. I canāt face it because iām scared itāll confirm that this year will mark you having been gone for longer than i knew you. You were such a massive part of my life for so many years. You were my guy, my number one. Iād never had a favourite athlete, a favourite driver or even a favourite team. You became that. You are that. My driver was you, my team was your team, we won together, we lost together. I was a big time JB fangirl. To be fair my childhood friends were too, except their JB fan-girling was of the Justin Bieber variety and well they were fools, the lot of them.
Youāre still the only sports person iāve ever had as my number one and now youāve nearly been āout of my lifeā for longer than you were in it and itās kind of freaking me out.
I of course donāt know why. Nothing has changed this last 7 years. I still see your smiling face and find great joy and happiness in the memories you created for so many of us whilst experience such heartache of you not being here when you deserved so much to be. Itās like my brain is telling me that the last 7 years without you have taken up the whole of the memories from when you were here. 7 years of happy memories to cope with 7 years of loss, what happens as we rush toward the 8th? Believe me i know, i know it makes absolutely no sense. Especially since your legacy is thriving. Your name and memory is linked to so many amazing things and you continue to light up so many lives. The association, your family, the drive for safer races, the halo.
Every single day there is a reason to smile because of something that is linked to you. I mean we could be getting ourselves a few champions this year out of your friends and loved ones and you would be so damn happy. Youāve also yet again helped in saving a whole load of lives alongside your family and association who too continue to strive in empowering and helping those facing TBIās.
The Bianchi legacy is amazing.
You, your family, your friends, competitors, teams, fans. Everyone who continue to hold you in their heart and fulfil their lives with the honour of having had you grace their lives. Your impact on this world was and continues to be stratospheric.
You truly are always remembered, sorely missed and forever loved.
You live on in so many people and nothing brings me more joy than seeing your family and friends thrive, love and live their lives to the fullest with you always by their side.
Damn. Eight years. If weāre just talking years, youāve officially been gone longer than i knew you. 7 years supporting you, 8 years to the day without you. Still here though arenāt i. Still supporting you and everything you were, are and will become. Always
I donāt know where this one will go Jules. It was going to be a good one, a happy one because from a personal point of view, the last few years have freaked me out with how long itās been and how i was feeling about it but then i got here, on the 8th anniversary (well nearly, itās the 16th and iām watching FE which will explain why this one is a tale of two halves - i always write these a few days in advance bc i ignore the day as much as possible) and well, i really fucking miss you and it hurts. Itās mad that iām glad it hurts in a way but as per the last few letters, i was scared i didnāt care. I knew i did, i felt i did but i was scared i was forgetting you. I wasnāt. I havenāt. Unlucky for you.
So yes, back to business. It was supposed to be good, then FRECA went to Spa. It was going to be bad, so bad. Then weāre here in Rome with FE and weāre brought this tale of two halves.
That sounds crazy as it is before you realise just how meant to be it was. Iāve supported Charlesā career since you were still here, iāve stuck around with him and stayed with F1 until he got to Ferrari (and yes when he gets a shot at the title, iāll turn up like these other fake fan trophy hunters and support him like i never left lol) but lad you know i was only ever really there for you and then for him and i just canāt do it. Weāve been through this all before though and the whole point of what iām trying to say is that i never really see Charles without linking him back to you and your family and me thinking of you having a hand in his win seems like me projecting and shoe horning you in like all these clout chasing TikTok girlies do (I do fight them, i promise and iām reliably informed this here site isnāt happy with them either)
But with the date, the history of how it happened, 10 years being a significant anniversary date, it being very nearly 7 years since his dad passed (adding that together you get 17)
It truly feels like it was written in the stars with you as the author.
How are we possibly here already. 10 years. Where has the time gone.
Iāve written this so many times i canāt even keep track anymore. Iāll let you in on a secret, all of these other letters, bar the first ever one on my last blog that i wrote the day you passed, have been written a bit in advance. Yes theyāre unedited and posted on a timer because even now, every anniversary gets me all over the shop but still they get done at least the day before. This one? Itās literally Thursday the 17th of July 2025. Itās midday and iām properly struggling. I can only assume itās because of how significant that 10 year anniversary feels. Maybe itās because i made a finalising point in that first letter (i hate that i deleted it, now would be a great time to re read it and react huh) about the 10th anniversary.
I pointed out the 1st year, then the 2nd, then the fifth and then i wondered about the 10th. That was the big number, the years and years and years in the future, a time inconceivable and far away. Yet here we are and iām drowning? I just donāt know how we got here when it still feels like yesterday we were watching you on the drivers parade sheltering from the rain. 10 years is just scary man.
I guess the big thing i can remember from that 1st letter is me questioning what it would all mean. There was so much why you, why your wonderful family, why, why, why. It couldnāt just mean nothing. You and your lovely lovely family didnāt deserve this. You couldnāt just be a name in the past,
Good thing, youāre not. Youāre still so remembered and your legacy lives on.
Youāve literally saved lives. When things inevitably go wrong #FIAthings people still say your name and how we promised weād never let what happened to you happen to anyone else and thus hold these people to account and make them get their act together. Obviously following your passing they finally got their arses in gear and brought in the Halo and Indyscreens (canāt think of their name rn oops) and together with those who too lost their lives in the name of this sport, have encouraged the safety and life saving of so so so many other drivers. Your wonderful family and all their work in the rehabilitation of other people thrust into the brain injury world. Thatās because of you. Despite not getting to that point, they recognised what would be your life had the injury not taken you and they know how important that is for other families and getting their loved one back to living a fullfilled life. I love them lol.
11 years and no proper āletterā. I donāt want it to be misconstrude, this isnāt about you not mattering or me forgetting you. I have the excuse that I couldnāt get on my Tumblr today but usually I do have one written out and scheduled, today I didnāt. Itās 22:31 as I write this so iām still in time!
I think you just mean more than writing a poxy letter to on social media. It started when I was 16 years old, that first one on the day you died? my God was it a mess! Iām 27 now and it feels juvenile and weird.. back then I followed you like my school friends followed Justin Bieber and One Direction and writing to you was a way to let out my thoughts and keep the connection to you that iād built, it kepts going and here we are
Maybe this will be technically be the last one, Iād not be surprised if it was, who knows
Just know that you mean the same to me now as you did then. I still remember you. I still dread this date (and 05/10) and remember you so often itās unbelievable.
I never had to worry or put effort into trying, i could never forget you or the love I held for you then and still do now.
I know I will miss you always and never forget you.
Wherever you are I hope youāre resting in peace and are proud of those you love.
[Image description: ten photos or groups of photos, each above its respective letter. This description will be in 3 parts due to character limits.
Part 1: One Year On - Four Years On
Above "A Letter to Jules - One year onā¦":
A set of 6 photos.
Top-left photo: An open-top two-seat white car with light blue stripe along the top, on a race track. Inside, on the left is a balding man with black hair and black round glasses. On the right, Jules Bianchi (a young man with dark brown hair and eyes), wearing a red coat, face scrunched up in annoyance at the heavy rain. He is holding a large red Marussia umbrella.
Top-right photo: Jules Bianchi, in a red Marussia jacket, facing left and laughing.
Middle-left photo: Jules Bianchi, in a smart medium blue suit, light blue tie, white shirt and black socks, removing a black office shoe from his left foot. He is sitting on a white concave backless chair, looking upwards and to his right, laughing.
Middle-right photo: Jules Bianchi, in a white Marussia overall with red highlights, sitting on the Monaco harbour wall (white rail on top of a black base), grinning. He is holding a black pit board with "Jules" in white writing and a red background. Underneath is "P9" in red letters on a black background.
Lower-left photo: The Marussia team, wearing the team colours of red, white and black, standing on a starting grid, holding a pit board. The pit board message is "17 Racing for Jules" in orange writing on a black background.
Lower-right photo: A black-and-white photo of the F1 drivers standing in a circle on a starting grid. In the centre of the circle, just visible, is Jules Bianchi's helmet. /photo set complete
Above "A letter to Jules - Two years onā¦":
Two black-and-white photos:
Left photo: A road sign stating, "Rue Jules Bianchi. Pilote de Formule 1. 1989 - 2015". Behind it are a modern block of flats (on the left) and a palm tree (on the right).
Right photo: The same road sign, surrounded by members of the Bianchi family. They are looking at each other and applauding. /photo set complete
Above "A letter to Jules - Three years onā¦":
A photo of Jules Bianchi, leaning right and looking at the camera, gently smiling. He is wearing a red jacket. In the background is a poster.
Above "A letter to Julio - Four years onā¦"
A set of 4 photos:
Top-left photo: A set of red-and-yellow karts lined up on a race track on a cloudy day. Some children are sitting in the other karts, but the front one (which has number 35 in black on its yellow number plate) instead has a mostly-yellow helmet on it, near its front-right wheel. Behind the karts are a row of children and their engineers. The left-most child is Charles Leclerc (a child with fringed dark brown hair and eyes), who is standing and smiling at the camera. He is wearing a mostly-red overall with a yellow stripe. To his right is Jules Bianchi, also standing and facing the camera, with crossed arms, wearing bright red T-shirt and shorts.
Top-right photo: Max Chilton (a young man with semi-swept blond hair and brown eyes) stands to the left of Jules Bianchi. Both are wearing red-and-white Marussia T-shirts, as well as green, orange and pink lei. Both are smiling.
Bottom-left photo: Three young racing drivers stand with their helmets in their hands, smiling. Sam Bird, with spiky blond hair, is on the left, wearing white overalls and facing the camera. Robin Frijns, in the middle and wearing red overalls, looks upward and is laughing. Jules Bianchi is on the right, wearing red overalls, looking left and smiling.
Bottom-right photo: Jules Bianchi (left), Alex Rossi (middle, with very dark brown hair and brown eyes) and Max Chilton (right), standing outside a motorhome with "Marussia F1 Team" written in black above its doors. All three are wearing a red Marussia T-shirt with white trim, as well as large red cowboy hats with the blue Marussia logo. /photo set complete]
it is a great privilege to experience the way f1 fans keep julesās legacy alive. the way they keep his memory alive. when jules drove his last race, i was 10 years old - and at an age where i could think of nothing more uncool than sitting with my father on sunday mornings to watch cars drive in circles. i wish i could say i experienced his magic personally - but iāve been lucky enough to learn about him by interacting with fans who loved him and by supporting charles, who races at least partly in dedication to him every week.
what i know of jules is cheerfulness. iāve never seen a picture of jules where he isnāt smiling. every video iāve ever seen of him, he is laughing and encouraging the people around him to laugh as well. he was light, pure and clear. the stories people tell of him paint the picture of a compassionate, attentive individual, one who never took for granted the opportunity to drive every day and the privilege of having the support he did.
what stands out about jules is the fondness with which people talk about him, the wholehearted belief in his potential. that if he had continued to drive, he would have achieved immense success, and that he would have been one to watch.
it is a blessing to be remembered as even 1/10th of the person that jules is remembered as. he is remembered as a beautiful, kind, positive soul. he is remembered with love infusing every word. i have never experienced a person memorialized the way jules has been for the past decade, and as he hopefully will be for many years. this memorial embodies āgone, but never forgottenā.
i do not know if i have the right to miss jules, having never known him. but i do know that the best thing i can articulate is my genuine gratitude for the fans who knew and loved him, whoāve kept his memory so faithfully alive. it is rare to be able to know someone after death the way f1 fans are able to get to know jules. and that, is a testament to the man he was and the love that surrounds him.
[Image description: A set of 4 photos of Jules Bianchi.
Image 1: Jules looks to the right of the photo, wearing red and white Ferrari Driver Academy overalls and with dark brown hair askew. There is an arm from an out-of-frame person gesturing in front of Jules. In the background is a foggy circuit.
Image 2: Jules looks at the camera, grinning, and gives a thumbs-up while leaning on a white pillow. He is wearing a red Marussia jacket.
Image 3: Jules grinning on the top step of the Silverstone 2011 GP2 podium. He is wearing white and green overalls.
Image 4: Jules, wearing white and green overalls, is smiling and raising a finger in celebration. Behind him is a green-and-white GP2 car.
/end ID]
@f1-described
[Image description: A photo of Jules Bianchi grinning at the camera. He is wearing a red and white Marussia collared shirt and the sun shines brightly through his hair. Behind him is an out-of-focus array of green plants. /end ID]
@f1-described
[Image description: A photo of Jules Bianchi, in a white shirt, standing in front of a black wall. The caption states, "Remembering Jules Bianchi, 17 July 2015".
/end ID]
@f1-described
[Image description: An Instagram post from Charles Leclerc. It has a message, "11 years, thinking about you *heart emoji", with a grey gradient background.
There is also a photo of Jules Bianchi (wearing a black and red jacket and red shorts) sitting on a bright red minikart. Charles is in the kart, wearing a blue and yellow Spiderman-themed helmet, as well as red and yellow overalls. There are some other child karters in the background.
/end ID]
@f1-described
half watching the TP presser and Alan Permane claiming he advises his drivers to listen to Max Verstappen's radio as a gold standard of calm feedback has to be a joke, right
& you know what it actually IS lifechanging to smile at strangers & say please & thank you & goodmorning & compliment someones outfit & help someone in need & be more accepting of loving other people just because they are other people!!!
As much as Mr. & Mrs. Bennet could have done much better preparing for the future and saving money in Pride & Prejudice, it's actually not surprising at all that they didn't manage it. Not just because they were banking on a boy but everything else too.
Saving is very hard and so few people do it. The government in my country has forced pensions that come right out of people's wages for a good reason. A lot of the inheritances we see in Austen are just money being passed on, saved by someone who had the will to do it and then paid forward. A mother's dowry was placed in trust and protected, then split between her daughters and etc. Recycled inheritances.
Mrs. Bennet going from "middle class" to upper class as a very young woman, it must have seemed like the money was endless and would never run out. Her husband didn't even have to work for it like her father! With so much wealth, saving must have just seemed unnecessary.
Mr. Bennet being born into wealth... I remember my parents teaching me to think about all money in terms of my minimum wage. I used to calculate how many hours as a cashier it took to buy this pair of jeans or that book I wanted to buy. Mr. Bennet never worked. He knew the money would keep coming until he died, barring some major disaster. The motivation to save must be so hard to inspire in those circumstances. He knew he should set some aside for emergencies, but he never actually did.
So many people live up to their incomes, no matter their wealth. So many people save nothing, despite knowing they should. I wonder what percentage of the gentry actually managed to save for their daughters (and extra sons) and how many failed at it.
And it makes me think, is one of the things that made Darcy so attractive to Elizabeth the fact that he could come up with Ā£3000 twice at the drop of a hat, indicating that he has both savings and an emergency fund?
Financial responsibility and planning, always attractive.
