The Foxhole Court

[yrningdohwa]

nothing amazes me more than the fact that a lot of us are attached to a self-published trilogy that's very poorly written, dramatic as hell and so unrealistic. the trilogy is so bad (and we all know this) but goddamn it has us in a chokehold and I think that's very powerful.

[anonymous8004]

I would kill to see Kaitlin Bennett attempt to interview Neil Josten.

[palmettios]

riko: i want to kill you

neil:

[lesbian-helen-gansey]

an actual photo of my friends and I discussing our three entirely different conceptions of what an Exy stadium looks like because the book’s description and the entire sport make no fucking sense

[volkarlot]

So my brother was showing me a few videos where American baseball, on friendly matches when the season’s not in, actually attach microphones and headpieces to a few players during the game? And instantly my head went straight to ‘what if they did that with Exy?’

They ask Andrew, Kevin, and Neil to give it a go first. Wymack making them do it for publicity, but also as a way for Neil to save face after his biting comebacks at post-game interviews. And also to give the foxes a slightly better rep all in. 

They soon realise that they get nothing from Andrew apart from a bit of heavy breathing every now and then. The crowd and commentators put it down to Andrew’s commitment and focus and all the foxes get a good laugh at that when they watch the replay.

Kevin and Neil try not give Andrew away by snorting into their own mics, Kevin tries to hide his own guffaw the first time it happens by coughing violently enough that they ask if he needs to sit out.

Neil doesn’t say much apart from counting his steps in multiple languages, but it’s just a random number here and there. But then when the commentators ask Neil questions, he’s still as sassy as ever.

“Neil, tell us what’s going through your mind!” the second he scores.

“I’m thinking I might take my teammate up on his offer for a therapist because the voices in head are starting to give me dangerous ideas.”

“We’ll…let you play on and come back to you later then.”

But when Neil does start having fun, starts to relax a little, he gives some of the wittiest comments and opinions, and some really snarky tips for all the players. People start tuning into the foxes game’s a lot more for his dry sense of humour.

Kevin though.

Kevin ‘most handsome and well spoken and humble in the public eye’ Day is sweating. And his teammates know it, all having a small twinkle of mischief in their eyes.

Kevin is downright vicious when he’s playing, especially in his commands to other players to pass to him, or watch his back, or defend the goal. His french is downright filthy sometimes too. So this headset thing is a lesson in control for Kevin.

He does well for the most part, but you can’t hold Kevin back when his brain is in competitive mode.

And then when the commentators start asking questions mid match…it doesn’t take long for Kevin to crack.

“Your style of playing has changed so much in the past few years since you left the Ravens, how do your teammates fare in comparison, now that you all seem to be settled.”

“They’re been improving every day and I can proudly say that they are meeting every expectation I have- except Neil! Christ sake! I was right there! même votre mère pouvait voir que je me tenais là et elle est six pieds sous!”

“…Kevin, sorry son, we missed that, could you repeat that but in English?”

Neil, fuming and ready to hurl his racket at Kevin’s head a few hundred times, “Yeah, Kevin, c’mon, tell the whole world what you just said.”

Kevin goes deathly pale and doesn’t really say anything for the rest of the match, but in his post-game interview, it’s his turn to start trying to save face. 

Somewhere, Jean is howling in laughter at Kevin’s expense.

And yet, this slightly unpolished version of Kevin makes him more favourable in the public eye for not being so robotic and inhuman, and that he does slip up every now and then. 

Everyone kind of hates it but they’re also hella relieved.

It does take quite a bit of sucking up to do on Kevin’s part.

They give everyone else a turn on the headset: Aaron is the same as Andrew and doesn’t say much, Nicky won’t stop talking to give the other players a chance to chip in, Dan is professional as always, Matt laughs infectiously even when he stumbles, and get’s everyone’s team spirit up, Allison is flirtatious and just as sassy, Renee is the humble one and comments more on the great skills of the opposing players. 

All in all, it’s an experience for all of them and Wymack regrets his decision to do this before it even finishes. 

Feel free to add anything on to this!! And Kevin says something along the lines of ‘your mother could see I was standing there and she is six feet under’ which is just…harsh dude. Maybe it takes a while for the public to get over that when they translate after all. And maybe a statement or two from Neil for people to forgive and forget…

[restoremyssoul]

you know 📚🧠, i 🙋🏽‍♂️ get it 😝🤭. being raised 👶🏻🤱🏻 as ⚖️ a superstar 🕺🏽🌟 must be really, really difficult 🙅🏻‍♂️❎ for YOU 👆🏾. always 📆 a commodity 🛋️🙇, never 🙅🏻‍♂️❎ a human being 🙋🏽‍♂️🗺️, not a SINGLE ☝️1️⃣ person🚶in your family 👨‍👩‍👦‍👦💖 thinking 💭 you're worth 🏆💰 a damn off 🙅🏽‍♂️ the court 🏟️🏌️. yeah ☑️, sound rough 🥵🤭. kevin 👉🏽🏌️ and i 🙋🏽‍♂️ talk about 📞🗣️ your intricate 🤢🌪️ AND endless 🥵💯 daddy issues 👨‍👦🙅🏽‍♂️ ALL the time 🗓️🕒🕓. i know 🙋🏽‍♂️📖 it's not ⛔ entirely your fault 👆🏾 that you are mentally 🧠 u n b a l a n c e d ⚖️🤹❎ AND infected 🦠😷 with these 🤲🏽 delusions 😣 of GRANDEUR, and I know 🙋🏽‍♂️📚 you are physically 🦵🏼💪🏼 incapable 🙅🏽‍♂️ of holding 🧺 a decent conversation 💬🗣️ with anyone 👥⛔ like every other normal 💯 human being 🙋🏽‍♂️🗺️ can, BUT i 🙋🏽‍♂️ don't think 💭⛔ that ANY of us 👥🙅🏽‍♂️ should have to put up 🤹 with THIS MUCH 📈 of your b u l l s h i t 🙅🏽‍♂️🥵. pity 😣 only gets you so many 👌🏽😷 concessions 📝, and you used yours 👆🏾🤡 up about six (6) insults 🗣️⛔ ago 📆. so please 🙏😔, p l e a s e (x2) 🛐, just shut 🗣️⛔ the ✨🧚‍♀️ fuck up 🧚‍♀️✨ AND leave 🏃 us 👥🙅🏽‍♂️ alone 🥵.

[sargent-major-jane]

do not try to tell me that in the universe where exy exists there are not people out there doing the lord’s work and making compilation videos with titles like “Andrew Minyard being a reporter’s worst nightmare for 8 minutes straight” and “Andrew Minyard glaring at people for his entire career”

[kevinbirthday]

The Foxes, leaving the banquet after Neil physically and verbally assaulted Riko:

[ravens-play-exy-too]

Neil running from the Yakuza: I am nobody. I am from Nowhere, Arizona. I have never played exy in my life. I am so unbelievably Boring.

Andrew, medicated: liar liar mom on fire

[two-wizards-in-a-trench-coat]

I saw some stuff going around about Neil coming out as Demi either to the foxes or to the public

While that’s really nice and sweet, and I love the rep, these headcanons forgoes two(2) things

1. Neil is an absolute dumbass and if you think he’s about to introspect his own sexuality and come to a conclusion other that “Andrew…nice.” you have a bigger esteem of him than I have

2. Neil is a chaotic dumbass and absolutely would, upon being asked if he’s gay on national tv, would say “I don’t like boys”. Then kiss his husband (Andrew) on camera

[sargent-major-jane]

Reporter: so do you like girls?

Neil: no

Reporter: guys?

Neil: no

Reporter: do you like anyone?

Neil: Andrew

Reporter: 

Neil:

Andrew:

Reporter:

Neil: is that it can we go now

[sargent-major-jane]

never forget that Neil and Andrew literally have matching coats like what fucken nerds thats adorable

[imstupidremember]

I love that we as a whole decide to make fun of Neil not knowing stuff but imagine him doing it on purpose. Like one day after practice the Foxes decide to go out for pizza and Neil just,, fucking,, eats from the crust side to the tip

Neil eating his pizza casually: :)

The Foxes:

[allforthecourtt]

[aftgisspacejam]

Ahem, Andrew is the instigator at heart? Man, are you sure?

[uberimmortal]

Kevin, holds up two fingers: How many?

Andrew, without his glasses: I will break your other hand.

[tinybab]

okay so andrew KNOWS he thought neil was pretty, so WHAT possessed him to put neil in nice clothes. like? did he think the fact that the attractive clothes and the attractive neil would cancel each other out? this isn't algebra, andrew, you're just making him PRETTIER, like

andrew, staring down attractive clothes and knowing neil is attractive: two wrongs make a right, isn't that how the saying goes

nicky: i don't think-

andrew: no no, i'm pretty sure i'm right

nicky: andrew-

andrew, knowing full well what he's doing: no. no. i am 100% positive i'm right

[ravens-play-exy-too]

Andrew after his plans went inevitably wrong :

[crazy-fangirl2524]

If Andrew Minyard breaks my arm I’ll apologise for the inconvenience and thank him for taking time out of his day to do it

Rip to Riko Moriyama, but I’m different