lovely

"I care about the tips of your toes and the depth of your heart...maybe I care too much, but foolishness is closer to love than hatred and disgust" || an other fried tofu blog || treat me well~ ^^ || 21

[alovelyhime]

I had a customer come in today and have the audacity to tell me that her vision is worse than mine and that i couldn’t possibly understand. 

HELLO? What fucking planet are you on? I may not look like I have a heavy prescription, but that doesn’t mean I see well. I have one eye that sees VERY well and another that seems to be diminishing as time goes on. To be fair, I’m only a -3.50 in that eye, but I will NEVER see 20/20. It just won’t happen. Do you know what this means? It means that I put a lot of stress on my good eye. I suffer many migraines because of it. There is no medicine that can fix it.

Sure, you put on you -4.00 in both eyes or whatever it is you wear and talk down to me. In your glasses you still see much better than I ever can and you will never have to feel the pain of a pulsing migraine that’s raging. No, no. You can talk down to me all you want. Trying to make me feel sorry for you. I can’t. I won’t. My debilitating migraine is making it nearly impossible to even look at you.

Half of a diaopter in optics is not that much. I can sympathize. Please do not talk down to me. I want(ed) to help you. You’re insulting.

[alovelyhime]

My baby sister is dating one of the most popular guys from my graduating class.

[alovelyhime]

MIA. sorry.

I’m a shit friend. Really. But life is really weird atm.

I have two jobs. Two cars. and.....things aren’t what I wanted. Not yet.

I have two jobs, but I barely make enough to support myself. Whenever I have extra cash I end up getting sick and then use that on medication.

I have two cars, but they are not mine. One has an engine that is about to blow up and the other is about to blow up at the transmission. 

When I’m not working, I’m baby sitting. When I’m not baby sitting I’m sleeping. I squeeze in showers and food...somewhere.

My boyfriend is thinking about joining the army. And I’m dying just thinking about it. I’m bad at all relationships. And if he leaves, I think it would kill me. I can’t follow him anywhere if we’re not married. Which will happen, but not for a while.

And I’m a shit friend.

I need to quit my jobs. I need to find something that works better for me and have bosses that actually care. I’m tired of working my ass off to prove myself and then getting hit in the gut. Don’t applause me for doing well and then NOT put me on the schedule. Do you know what it’s like to have people tell me I should become an optometrist? To tell me that I’ve explained things better to them than most opticians? I feel that I do a really good job. BUT FUCK, CORPORATE AMERICA! Knowledge and understanding means nothing is you don’t sell-sell-sell..

I’m so worn out all the time. And I want to go back to school.

and I’m a shit friend. i have all these excuses. and no friends.

[alovelyhime]

funny thing...

Don’t call yourself blind, unless you are...in fact...blind.

\I work in optics. I see people with 20/15 vision all the time. They come in and complain about every little thing. I get it. You want to see perfectly. But guess what, that’s unrealistic.

I do not see 20/20. I cannot. I will not and probably will continue losing my vision. It scares me to think that each year less and less of my vision is correctable. Did you get that? I don’t see 20/20 with glasses. I see about 20/30 on a good day, and that’s only with one of my eyes. The other 20/60. I am TERRIFIED that my children will have the same problems as me. I suffer from migraines and I just recently found out the biggest cause is my vision.

But I am lucky. I can still see most things. It’s just the details are unclear. I will never be able to fully read street signs, but I have a navi. My brain has learned to over come my sight and recognize shape and assume what words are. It’s nice. I truly am faking it till I make it. But I am lucky. There are many with worse vision than me.

So please, stop calling yourself blind, unless you really are.

[alovelyhime]

Yesterday I curled my hair and did my makeup. EVERYONE complimented me and wow, I haven't heard that in a while. It's nice. But.. Some people kept talking about it and I, I started to second guess myself. Like maybe I looked weird, but it was painfully obvious that I wanted to look nice, so they kept complimenting me. -___-'

I dunno. I liked the way I looked yesterday.

[alovelyhime]

I just wanna stay home and watch K-dramas.

[alovelyhime]

My dad has been a happa his entire life and it's taken him 53 years to notice that full Asians will look at him funny. We sat at Christmas dinner and my aunt and I (my sister...she looks mexican tbh...sorry Meimei) explained to him that they were simply trying to figure him out. Is he white? Is he Asian? Is he mixed? Or is he a totally different race together.

Lol

[song-minguk]

XDDD

[ilytd]

[alovelyhime]

Realizing that even some of the nicest people are totally backwards. A lady I work with gets angry that organizations like TOMS and One Sight help those overseas, instead of helping war vets and those in active military. No, the government does not take well enough care of our military men, but that's not the responsibility of private organizations. Most private organizations do mission trips outside AND inside the United States, but they are not about to step on the toes of our government. They are there to help those whom the government has been unable to help, while trying to spread the wealth of not only the US, but other countries. These organizations might be based in the United States, but they aren't restricted to business inside the country. So for them to ONLY help those in the US while having funds from other nations is irresponsible.

[alovelyhime]

A little rant...

i don't understand people who can read articles about fat shaming and skinny shaming, agree with it and then proceed to start skinny shaming. -_-'

I love this girl, I really do, but I've been on both sides of the spectrum. I'm bee overweight and under weight. I've had people fat shame me and then later skinny shame me. I understand both. Try to have some compassion. Please.

The two are not the same, that is for sure. But that doesn't make one more right than the other.

I am thin. Yes, I am aware. I used to be thinner, and when I was people would tell me to eat more, roll their eyes at me and just be generally rude. When I was fat, things were much more severe. I didn't have friends. People made fun of me. It was just generally unfair. I became the fat kid overnight and everyone poked fun at me.

But again, it's two DIFFERENT things.

Do not say that stores are fat shaming you because they "don't have your size" (unless it's Holister or similar..you're paying for them to criticize you). If they don't have it in stock at the store, maybe it's because they don't have enough of a market in that size. Stores a ALL about making money. If suddenly everyone gained 50-100 pounds, they would start making those sizes to make that money. Don't trust me, just look at the greedy industries.

As difficult as it is for "bigger" girls to find clothing, being thin is not all rainbows and sunshine either. It's honestly, a confidence thing. I have ZERO confidence. I don't like jeans. They look awful on me. You know how hard it is to find size 21 jeans? I have only been able to find one pair of jeans in the past FOUR years. I'm a size 5-9 with odd portioning around my thighs. This comes from my fat days. I can't rid the weight, and I've stopped trying. it's too much work. I'm pretty happy with myself, currently. But I have bowed legs, thicker upper thighs, fat that hangs away from my crotch and causes a disgusting shape. I do have a thigh gap. I do. but this is due to the shape of my legs, NOT my weight. I could gain 25 more pounds and still have a gap. It's not a matter of weight, but BONES. Because of this strangeness in my legs, I'm not confident in wearing leggings or jeans. I spend all day in skirts and dresses. I just don't like my body. I don't like the way my body looks in certain clothes. I love my body enough. They are two different things, but both are about someone being dissatisfied with their/someone else's body. I would be satisfied with mine, if all clothes looked great on me. But they don't.

Fat shaming and skinny shaming, they are a thing. both are. Let's stop it all. please.

[itsbap]

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[alovelyhime]

Regardless of all the shit that's been happening this week, I have some AMAZING people who've been trying so hard to make my birthday special. Thank you Ezz, MeiMei, Oppa and YooJin. You four are the best!

[alovelyhime]

About this time last yea, I saw a friend of mine sitting on this guy's lap in the library. It was weird to me because it seemed like she was jumping around from guy to guy but that's not exactly her personality.

Now she is married, to a guy I've never met before O-O

[becauseofsnow]

D-9 Happy 19th birthday Choi Junhong! | STRICTLY NO REPOSTING

[thechivalrousfox]

A transparent ghostie friend for all of your spoopy needs

[victorvonvaporwave]

Apple bottom jeans