can you do a post in what do you think a stefonnie relationship/friendship could have been compared to the stelena and steroline dynamics, how similar or different and things stefonnie would have on their own
I’ve been coming back to this ask a few times because it’s always a bit hard to parse what I want to say when it comes to stefonnie.
The steroline relationship before it became a “relationship” was about Caroline and Stefan sort of decompressing with each other, particularly in season 4 and 5. They sat by the fireplace or in the living room and drank together and spoke about their day, spoke about their respective love lives. Of course in season 2 their relationship was more about Stefan being a rock for Caroline and Caroline sort of poking holes in Stefan’s exterior simply by asking him questions like when she asked about Lexi.
The stelena relationship was about Elena and Stefan finding comfort and intimacy in each other, breathing life back into each other by loving one another, holding it down for each other and for the people around them by being a united front. It was about love.
What I think about stefonnie is that I think they would’ve taken care of each other in a way that’s more like a platonic version of stelena as opposed to what steroline had because there’s a certain tenderness and softness that comes through when Bonnie and Stefan interact that he doesn’t have with Caroline, like it’s as if Bonnie’s sharp edges sort of round out with him and Stefan almost has this puppy dog look with her:
I think that they’re very similar people, loyal to the point of self-destructiveness, it’s not easy for them to let other people in, they hide their pain and repress their emotions and I think they would recognize that in each other. So for instance, I can see them with Elena and Damon and Caroline and Tyler and Matt and Jeremy (and Enzo I guess, ugh) coming up with plans and strategies and putting a brave face and once everyone leaves the room one of them would go to the other and ask so just how much danger are you going to put yourself in for this plan? Don’t lie to me, I know you.
Stefan would’ve been the perfect person for Bonnie to just cry with when everything is getting overwhelming and she doesn’t know what to do and she’s breaking down because Stefan would just hold her and listen:
And Stefan is actually very protective of Bonnie:
He was willing to die in 2x21 so Bonnie wouldn’t have to perform a spell, he saves her life repeatedly.
And Bonnie is also very protective of Stefan, she didn’t like the idea of him walking through fire in 1x22 to save Damon:
she was devastated seeing him pass through her in 5x21
so I think with Stefan, she would worry about him every time he risked his life. I could also see them arguing about who’s going to do the most dangerous aspect of a plan, I can see Bonnie being like, “Elena needs you, Stefan. So does Damon. I can’t let you go through with this” and Stefan being like, “But everyone needs you, I need you. You hold everyone together. I would never be able to forgive myself if anything happened to you.”
Stefan would be the person who knows Bonnie’s favourite flowers, what her coffee drink is, he would check up on her, and I could actually see them going on road trips together to find something to save Elena or save Damon or save someone else and just talking about Jeremy, about Elena, about Caroline, whatever. I could see them communicate without speaking just by looking at each other. I don’t know, it just feels like it could’ve been a relationship where they get to be soft with each other and vulnerable with one another.