♤ Me, Myself & I ♧ @amarryliss - Tumblr Blog

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I know people make really beautiful presentations' post but I'm lazy so I'll just drop name whatever I'm into !

About me : I'm 20y, French and my pronouns are she/her ! Also, my real name is a flower, hence my username :D

(Below you'll find my favorites games, animes, podcast, tv shows, musicals and more~)

lunehowls

season 5 is a delight

mercurianart052

TMA headshots I made a while back!!

demonperson6

Tma spoilers (art)

Apocalypse and shit

duffbionn

Lightner/Darkner fun gang swap AU

korokio

do you think she spent the entire night looking for them

amarryliss

...In fact, I do not want to think about that.

#deltarune #utdr #deltarune weird route #susie deltarune #deltarune susie #deltarune spoilers #deltarune chapter five #deltarune chapter 5 #deltarune fanart

imatiredflamingo

[Spoilers for tma episode 144 -Decrypted]

Martin is recording a statement!

"statement of Gary Boylan, given October 3rd 2009." On october 3rd, he asked me what day it was.

"It was grey – I remember that so clearly – and hot, but no sun. No sun at all. The sky had that thick layer of cloud that catches the heat and it choked me on in. Fields and fields of yellow grass that went on forever, with rusted pylons looming over all of it. It was that appalling sort of summer you only get in the middle of England, with all the joy of the season stripped away, leaving endless fields of dry soil and emptiness." Well, that's already not joyous.

"Have you ever been driving along a motorway, passing through the middle of some rural nothing place, when you spot, in the distance, on some tiny road you have no idea how to reach, a row of three or four terraced suburban houses? Just sitting there, no town or village for miles, just a weird, unattached little street – that’s where I live." I can picture that, yeah... I'll probably see those when I go on holiday, I'll think about that...

Oh, his father is a vet, we have that in common!

"I think all those years hanging around farmers must have rubbed off on him. He hated doctors, for instance, something I always pointed out was absurd given his own job. I’d say he was a vet, and he’d say, yeah, he was, and start talking about how many animals he’d put down in his career." Welp

"Something kept me rooted there, sleeping in a bedroom that hadn’t changed since I was fifteen and caring for a man who I’d rather just shut up. We were both trapped there, I think, bound together in a sort of wordless misery. I would look at him and see a grim sort of destiny for myself, trapped here until I became him, any future I might have had sacrificed to his." This is pretty depressing...

"I always used to go for long walks through the fields to try and escape for a bit." A nice walk, fresh air, it always helps. Doesn't fix eveyrthing of course, but it sure feels nice.

"We were a long way from any real trails, and the most scenic things to see were rusted tractors, piles of discarded tyres, or the huge metal skeleton of an old disconnected power pylon. It was a bleak and empty rural wasteland, and when the summer heat hit, without shade or shelter, it was almost as relentlessly oppressive as that old man." Oh. Well.

"It was this last August that it happened. I was about an hour into my walk, having had a row with him about his failing eyesight, a subject that made him even more defensive than usual, and was passing by an old sheet metal barn when I heard it. I’d been listening to music as I walked, when my iPod abruptly cut out." Something's messing with the technology...

"I stopped where I was and took it out of my pocket, assuming I’d knocked it or somehow turned it off, but the screen was on, apparently playing music, though I didn’t immediately recognise the song. I’ve got a pretty sizable music collection, but I feel like I do know it pretty well. This one had no artist, no album, just the track name: “Numbers”. " STOP, THAT REMINDS ME OF SOMETHING THAT HAPPENED TO ME IN HIGHSCHOOL

I had my headphones connected to my phone. Just old headphones, that weren't working that well. I remember, I was outside, probably waiting for my next class to start or something. And I don't remember if I was clicked on a song or if I clicked the return button to stop the music, but there was some... glitch? Cause I heard something that sounded like a halloween song, you know, the kind that you could play at a kids halloween party, with "spooky" cliche witch or little creatures laughs. The thing is, there was no song on my phone that was even near that kind of music. And I think my phone was... normal, there was just that music for a few seconds. I quickly unplugged my headphones and locked them in my locker. (There was little packets of salt I was taking at the cafeteria because of Supernatural) When I went to get them back, one side wasn't working anymore. I bought new headphones. I don't know what happened.

"As I stared at it, I began to hear something from my headphones. It was a faint and tinny tone, like it was far off or produced by a low-tech synthesiser or something. The tone began to shift, and I realised that it was playing a tune. It seemed to be a crude rendering of the opening lines of “The Skye Boat Song”. It only got through about a line and a half of the old folk melody before it abruptly cut off." Weird...

"There was a moment of silence before it was replaced by a voice, a man, but his voice was so distorted and pitch-shifted that it could have been anyone. It barely even sounded human as it spoke in its strange monotone. “Five. Nine. Three. Seven. Five. Six.” " What is that supposed to mean???

"I’ve heard about numbers stations, and I know all about the Lincolnshire Poacher and the Russian Man. I know they’ve all got perfectly logical explanations and real world uses for espionage and that." Oh, yeah, makes sense.

"It seemed to be coming from my music player, though I had a look through my library and couldn’t find anything that matched it." I feel you, buddy.

“Three. Zero. Five. Eight. Three. Nine. Two. Eight. Four. Six.” " But what does those numbers mean???

"Eventually I staggered to my feet and began to make my way home." Might be for the best, yeah.

"Do you know that one of the symptoms of a heart attack is literally “a sense of impending doom”? Well, I wasn’t having a heart attack, but I think I know what they mean." I didn't know about that!

"What settled over me wasn’t dread, there wasn’t enough uncertainty for that. No, it was doom. I was certain that some sort of disaster was on the horizon. I’d walked less than a hundred yards when the numbers stopped coming, and ‘London Calling’ started playing again." I'm already more familiar with that.

"I did do a bit of research into numbers stations, but I didn’t find anything new. I did find a couple of clips online, though, which were enough to convince me that what I’d been hearing had been a numbers station, or at least a passable imitation, although the voices on the proper recordings sounded neutral, almost mechanical – very different to the grating distorted mess I had heard." I think I watched a video about that...

"What did it mean? What did any of it mean?" GOOD QUESTION

"It took about a week of searching to find it again. To be honest, at the time I didn’t even realise I was looking for it. I just found myself going further and further afield, retracing old routes for the sake of it, always with my music cranked up so loud I couldn’t hear the insects buzzing everywhere." Oh, so it's only when he's on one of those long walks?

"It was fainter than it had been before, though, harder to pick out the exact numbers in the distortion and the quiet. So, I began to walk again, this time paying close attention to the volume and clarity of the sound. “One. Six.” Fainter to the North. “Two. Eight.” Unchanged going South. “Three. Zero.” Southeast was stronger. “One. Six.” But began to weaken again after a mile or so. “Five. Zero.” Much stronger around the eastern hill. “Four. Nine.” There, the pylon, that was it." Okay...

"Except obviously that wasn’t it. It wasn’t a broadcast tower and there was nothing in or around it that could possibly have been sending out any signal. It was just a collection of old and twisted metal bars rising up into the half collapsed power tower. It must have been decades since it had been anything other than a decaying steel obelisk. Even if that hadn’t been the case, this wasn’t a broadcast, this was … This was inside my iPod." Yeah, it can't be that...

"Nonetheless, when I stood in the centre of the hollow beneath that pylon’s rusted corpse, the numbers came through crystal clear. “Five. Six. Four. Eight. Four. Six. Four. Seven. Four. Eight. Two. Seven.” " But why??? Why that pylon???

"I had actually brought a notebook and pen, I now realised, just to write down the numbers. And so, I did. Four hours I spent, patiently jotting down the numbers. ‘The Skye Boat Song’ repeated every hour and a half, but I went through the sequence a few times just to assure myself it didn’t change and I hadn’t missed any." Smart thing to do.

"When I finally took out my headphones, the sudden rush of summer evening sounds hit me like a wave, leaving me reeling and dizzy. It took me a moment to realize how late it was, and how sunburned I had gotten in the process." Ouch

"I’d been out easily twice as long as any time before, but my dad didn’t say a word about it, just sat in front of the TV, laughing at some crappy panel show, smoking that pipe that left the wallpaper yellow and peeling. I remember thinking he wasn’t content to just destroy himself; he seemed to have to take everything out around him." That's sad...

"I didn’t return to the pylon for a long time, except to confirm that the numbers weren’t changing between days." Alright...

"Realistically, it would be impossible to decode it without whatever key the cypher might have been using, and honestly, for the longest time, it seemed to be. I did as much reading as I could on cryptography and codebreaking, and all of it seemed to point me towards one simple conclusion: breaking this code by myself was simply impossible. But I still tried." That's the spirit!

"So, I worked myself into exhaustion instead, staring at those meaningless strings of numbers until I almost collapsed and my eyes couldn’t focus on anything. And that was when I realised, it wasn’t the numbers. It wasn’t the code. It’s what was behind the numbers, shifting and waiting and coming towards me like a tidal wave." Oh?

"And I knew what the message was, the urgent and terrible message about the destruction that was coming on the heels of mankind, about the cold and cruel warmongers who play their games of code and conspiracy, hidden behind the endless streams of numbers. And within those numbers are all of our dooms, if you know how to read them." Oh. You mean, capitalism, and the few who have enough power to reverse it but choose to embrace it for more numbers.

"I fled the house. I ran, as fast as I could, to the pylon, the ruined place that knew all of the numbers, and I fell to my knees and wept. I begged it to spare us, to spare me, as I stared at the flesh I knew would redden and bubble and blister away to the bone beneath. I didn’t need headphones to hear the numbers now. They were pouring from the air around me and threaded through my mind, and no matter how I begged, they would not stop." I feel so bad for him...

"When I returned, the house was in ruins, the windows shattered and broken, glass strewn across the floor." Oh no

"There was nothing left of my dad, save a charred shadow on the wall, scorched through the plaster and into the now exposed brick." That's horrible...

"There are terrible things coming, things that if we knew of them would leave us weak and trembling with shuddering terror at the knowledge that they are coming for all of us. We all made them, and their course is already plotted. You can see them in the numbers, if you only learn how to read them." That's so ominous, but I see his point.

Well, it clearly was about the Extinction...

"Another statement, another side to Peter’s “Extinction”, I think. I, uh, I couldn’t follow some of his reasoning, but I think it was about nuclear weapons, or maybe- doomsday weapons? In keeping with the theme, I suppose." Yeah, that also.

"I just wish Peter would spend less time trying to convince me his new power is real and more time telling me what he plans to do about it." I love how passive agressive he is right there lol

Knock on the door!

Hi Daisy!

"They’re back. Thought you might want to know. Seems like it went smooth. Too smooth for Basira, it sounds like. Keeps looking at Jon like she can’t believe he made it back." Well, it could have gone so much worse...

The silence is so awkward...

"I, uh, I mentioned our conversation to him. He asked me to check on—"

"Just leave."

"Sorry?"

"Get out."

"Oh. Right. Sorry, I didn’t…"

"It’s not difficult. Just get out.

"Fine." Wow, that's very harsh! ...It means that Peter Lukas is around, right? It's only pretending, right?

"Fine. Just thought—"

"No, no you didn’t. We’re not friends, Daisy. None of us are. We’re all just trapped together here and kidding ourselves that we don’t hate it. Christ, there are more important things than feelings right now, so just leave me alone. For good." Yeah, there's gotta be something. Not that he's wrong about that, but the way he says it is so harsh all of a sudden... It's not just the influence of the Lonely, wanting to be alone at all cost.

Of course Daisy doesn't know about that... Not cool for her. After that, she definitely won't want to go talk to him again, and he'll feel even more alone.

THAT AWFUL NOISE AGAIN

I KNEW HE WAS AROUND

"Well?"

"I’m impressed. And grateful."

"I didn’t do it for you."

"Even better."

"Easier this way. I’m sure you’d have had no problem sending her away."

"I hadn’t really thought about it, and now, thanks to you, I don’t need to."

Yeah, it was to avoid her to get into big trouble.

"Yeah, well. It seems to be your 'go-to’ move for dealing with anyone."

"I’m just not big on confrontation. You understand, I’m sure." Manipulation is easier, feels less dirty, huh?

"We are not the same."

"Of course." THAT TONE THAT SAYS "Sure, whatever comforts you", WHILE HE KNOWS HIS PLAN IS WORKING IT'S SO ANNOYING

"Did you read it?"

"Yeah."

"And?"

"I believe you."

"You don’t still think I’m trying to trick you into a grand ritual?"

"I mean, I’m not about to start chanting stuff for you, but… the details you’ve given me all seem to check out. So far." Yeah, cause just because that's part of his plan, maybe of some ritual doesn't mean it's not true...

"So, what’s our next step?"

"For you, keep researching. I’m sure we haven’t found all the statements in here that deal with The Extinction yet. One of the downsides of not serving the Ceaseless Watcher is that we have to actually look things up, not to mention the fact that Gertrude was distressingly good at obfuscation. The more you know about our enemy, the better."

"And you?

"I have my own explorations I need to attend to. And a, um, meeting to arrange. For you." WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN

"For me?"

"I’m absolutely delighted with your progress, and I feel you’ve earned some straight answers."

"But not from you?"

"Oh no, that sort of conversation makes me very uncomfortable." YOU'RE COMFORTABLE WITH TWISTING THE TRUTH TO YOUR ADVANTAGE BUT NOT WITH JUST SAYING IT AS IT IS.

"No, I’m owed a favour by a friend of mine. I’ve asked him to stop by when he’s back in the country." WHO EVEN IS THAT

"You’re not just going to tell me, maybe?"

"When have I ever?" It's frustrating. Because he may be planning, scheming and manipulating, but I gotta hand it to him, he's played by all the same rules.

"What would life be without the occasional twist? Oh, speaking of which, I’ve had a report of a workplace dispute in the Library, and I would value your input. I’m trying to get out of the habit of, what did you call it, “sending them away?” " FLASH NEWS, MAKING PEOPLE VANISH ISN'T APPRORIATE WORKPLACE BEHAVIOUR

The way he's saying that, it feels like he's saying "okay, here's a little reward for following my plan", and it sickens me.

I don't know what to think about the Extinction. I mean, sure, it's the fifteen Dread Power, why not. But does it have to be stopped, I mean... I'm starting to wonder about all the rituals, what if they are all... destined to fail in some way? Because yeah, stopping the world from coming to a terrible end, sure, but it just feels... like a decoy. It can't be just that, it's part of some plan....

I don't really know what to think. Except that I still don't trust Peter Lukas and that I never will, no matter the "evidence" of him being right about the Extinction.

knuckle-velv3tt

jsheios

Like-like

holidayturkeyy

* KEEP GOING

caticat28

This was supposed to be just sketches, i got carried away tho...

redfox-44

Oh, damn, I'm really enjoying this little mermaid retelling anime that apparently has yuri in it and- OH MY GOD IS THAT JONATHAN SIMS?!

THATS THE MOST JONATHAN SIMS JONATHAN SIMS I'VE SEEN IN MY ENTIRE LIFE!!!!

cokibby

nah, screw it

capricatttt

Never ask a Krusie fan what happened in chapter 5 of the hit game Deltarune

the-forest-library

kill the imposter syndrome in your head because not only is there someone out there doing it worse than you, they’re also using chat gpt to do it

nanakaiseedling

The Susie Prize

#deltarune #deltarune fanart #deltarune art #kris dreemurr #kris deltarune #deltarune kris #deltarune susie #susie deltarune #krusie #krusie deltarune

imatiredflamingo

[Spoilers for tma episode 152 -Scrutiny]

I assume this is going to be about the Eye...

Oh, Martin is recording a statement directly from subject! Hasn't happened since... episode 100 I think?

"I’d like to, to talk to you about one of your staff." Oh.

"Would you mind telling me what happened? What they did?"

"He."

"Ah, alright. Um, did he… Did he look like he hadn’t slept in like a week?" He immediately knew who she is talking about.. "Mmmhmm. Yep. Uh, he’s been— Yeah, I think he’s been, uh, following me. Kind of." Are you feeling... watched?

"Yeah, I see. Well he’s not here at the moment so… I mean— Yeah, why don’t you tell me what happened."

"Look, it’s, uh… I don’t know. I-It’s just kind of weird."

"Well, you know… Weird is what we do!

"Okay." "Just, just tell me what happened? Um, please? I won’t judge." He's trying so hard to be as helpful as possible...

"I work for Thames Water, uh, mainly pipes and stuff. Like, I mean, I mean, I’m a qualified engineer, but, you know, mostly it’s, it’s just manual stuff, like digging and replacing pipe. Sometimes I’ve got to— You know, there are actual sewers involved." Sounds like a tough job.

That poor lady sounds distraught...

"About five years ago, we were doing some work under Kentish Town. It was pretty nasty. Do you know what a fatberg is? No, uh, it— Don’t worry. Don’t look it up, seriously. Don’t." I'm very tempted to look it up...

"Maybe it was rotten or, or unstable or the place kind of— The place kind of collapsed on me. You know, just one moment I’m stood there torch in hand, and the next I’ve got a shooting pain all up my arm and I can feel god knows how much rubble on top of me and it’s absolutely pitch dark." Oh no, that must have been so awful...

"Well, I don’t know how long I was down there. Well, well, I do, it was three hours, they told me." Which is already an awfully long time in itself. Being under the rubbls and not knowing if help is on the way, if you're actually gonna be able to get out? Yeah, it must have felt like eternity!

"But I was lying there, panicking, screaming, just trying to make any noise, any movement that didn’t hurt like hell." I feel so bad for her...

"And I… Okay. I felt something. No, I felt someone, grab my ankle. At first it was great, I had this, this huge wave of relief, right? Someone had found me, they were getting me out." She must have felt so much hope, and she lost it right away, I'm sure of that...

"But no, it didn’t feel right. It wasn’t— It was cold, right? Like… like old stone, or wet sand. It felt, like, rough, and, and like the fingers weren’t… I don’t know, it felt like they, they weren’t in the right places." Creepy...

"I realised something. The way it w— it was grabbing me, holding my leg, there was— it had to have been coming upwards. From below me. And there was no-one else down there when that tunnel collapsed. Absolutely no-one. I’m sure." Oh no

"So then I start screaming again. And kicking, thrashing about. It hurts but, I mean, I’m scared out of my mind," Very understandable reaction

"but the, the hand, it just grips tighter and I can feel its fingernails just… It-It-It started pulling. It was pulling down, dragging me down. Into the earth." Oh no no no

"and then this slab of stone came away in front of me and there was daylight, and, and Abby, one of the work crew, was staring at me. And, and, yeah, just like that it was… gone." It was this close, wow...

"But the bruise stuck around. Horrid, muddy bruises where the fingers had grabbed me." Ew.

"So, it, it took a long time to get over that. I mean, that’s not weird, right? I me— It was a bad time. You know, it, it stays with you. Was signed off, what, I think about six months with the injuries. Had pretty bad, uh, nightmares, claustrophobia, I mean, obviously, right?" Of course, that was traumatising!

"You know, once the bruises were gone I— Well, it’s easy to blame memory, right? You know, ha-hallucination, coincidence, all the classic shite you tell yourself. Life went back to normal. I— I was fine." Until she wasn't...

"Until about two weeks ago." Very recent...

"That’s when he showed up. Y-You know the coffee shop, uh, just next to Pimlico? Uh, the, the nice one. Well, I a— I actually had a date there. You know, cute guy I met online. Seemed sporty, which, I kind of like and— Look, it doesn’t, it doesn’t matter." Imagine just trying to move on with your life, you go on a date, unaware that you're gonna come back home with even more trauma-

"Anyway, I get a latte and sit down waiting for, uh, Grant? I wanna say Grant. Or Ga-re… Gareth? Gary? Anyway, look, he’s running late, and, and, and I’m just reading." The fact that she doesn't even remember the name of the guy already shows how it went: not far.

"There’s this creep in, in the corner. Your guy. He just… keeps staring at me, like, like properly staring. Like, it is super intense and, and real weird. Like he knows me, but I sure as hell do not know him. I— I try to ignore him, look, I just, I just read my book, and every time I look up there he is, watching me." Jon, you can't do that to people, it's creepy!

"You know, I’m about to say something, you know, like, when in comes Gary? Gareth? Gavin? and suddenly, hey, it’s a date. And I really didn’t want his first impression of me to be, you know, me yelling at some creeper in the corner. So I just swap chairs so that I’ve got my back to your ‘colleague’, and get on with it." Honestly, you could have yelled at him.

"Didn’t really matter, you know, in the end, Gareth was a, was a bust. You know, not like, you know, I mean… He, he was fine, I guess, it’s just there was nothing really there between us. You know? Just a nice, boring coffee with a kinda dull man." Ouch. Well, that was predictable.

"Took about an hour and he clearly wasn’t feeling it either, so we, you know, we just called it. I mean, we actually shook hands when he left, which… I mean, tells you something, right?" Yeah.

"Look, I’m packing up, all done and, and I just, I just sorta turn, you know, just, just to check if he’s still there and he is standing right behind— Like, like a few inches from my face. Look, it’s messed up!" It is!

"And I start to ask him, you know, what the hell, man, you know? Like— But he just starts talking. Slowly. But real intense. He says, he works here, at the, the Magnus Institute, and I say, what even is that and he says, he wants my story. He says he needs to hear what happened to me." Jon, you need to find a better way to approach people to ask for their statement, please...

"And I— I want to tell him to j-just go away. I want to, to, to kick him and run. But I— (long sigh) I sit down. And I start to tell him everything. About the job, about the collapse, a-about the hand. More than I told you, even, and, and as I do— it’s like I’m there nagain. Like I can feel it grab my ankle, th-th-that cold, dead hand and I just… I just can’t stop talking." I'm so sorry for her... Having to relive it is awful...

"It felt like, like I was throwing up all those feelings again, and I wanted to, to scream but instead I just sat and calmly told him my life story. And he just watched me, his eyes like… His eyes were, were like drinking in every fragment of my misery. I can’t— It— And then it was over. And he looked— He looked at me like he’d just eaten, like a perfectly cooked steak." Well, that's kinda how it feels to him, tbh

" You know what he said? He said, “Thank you.” “Thank you.” Just like that. Like, like reliving the worst parts of my whole life were just a bit of a… a favour that I’d done him." I feel so bad for her...

"That wasn’t the end."

"You… You’ve seen him since?"

"No. Not— Kind of? I feel like I do." Nightmares and feeling watched?

"Nightmares where the, where the hand keeps pulling and I go deeper and deeper and, and deeper into… It takes me places I do not want to go. And he’s there the whole time, just… watching me. Watching me scream and thrash and… He’s all eyes. He’s all eyes." Yeah, it's terrifying...

"But I feel like I’m seeing him when I’m awake as well. I’ve been… I’ve been having a lot of problems since he talked to me. Since I talked to him. Since I told him my story. The, the claustrophobia, it’s back, worse than it ever was and I can’t do my job. I have these, these screaming panic attacks every time I try and—" Does... giving a live statement, directly, makes you afraid, like... keeps the fear alive inside you? So that it... feeds the dread power it's linked to? Like, here, the Buried. Does the Buried still feeds of her fear? And the Eye, of course, somehow.

"What am I supposed to do? Like, feels like, like every time I’m even slightly underground I— Can’t even go into a shop basement more without feeling that… hand. Every time I do, every time I get that panic just rising up my throat, I see him. He’s there. Not when I look properly, but just at the edge. The corner of my eye. Then he’s gone." It must be so mentally exhausting to live that...

"So I want to put in a complaint. Like a proper complaint. I don't want to go to the police. I mean, I doubt that they would— They wouldn’t even, you know, let me get this far, would they? But— Sorry. So thanks, I guess." Unfortunately, I don't think there's anything to do...

"Well, firstly I’m, I’m really sorry that this happened. Um, in, in terms of next steps—"

"Just— I just— I don’t know. You know? Talk to him, I guess, just tell him— Look, I mean that’s not okay! You know, right? I’m not— I don’t know what he did, but it’s— You know, he can’t just go around and well— y’know, just keep doing—" Yeah! Somebody has to tell him!

She left without even giving her name... But this place is so... I understand that she wanted to leave so quick.

"What the hell do I do with that? I mean, Christ John, that’s not okay! Oh, that can’t, that can’t… I mean it’s not him, is it? Not, not really. Is it… what, addiction? Instinct? Maybe mind control, something like that. I can’t believe he’d choose to do something like that." He can, very much. You need to talk to him about that, maybe he'll listen to you

"No, no. I can’t think like that though. I can’t let myself, cos I mean, if, if he’s already gone then all of this is just—" Oh...

"The, the worst part is I don’t even want to talk to him about it." Because it's gonna be a difficult conversation, right? Right????

"I’m just— I suppose I’m just getting comfortable with the distance. Cut off. Lonely." NOOOOOOOOO

It's actually working, NO!

"Mind you, Peter’s not wrong. It really is easier than actually just trying to communicate with people." NO NO NO DON'T LISTEN TO HIM, THE EASY WAY ISN'T ALWAYS THE RIGHT WAY

"I should probably try to get him this tape. Let him know what happened, that someone came in to— But then, heh heh, would that just come across as an accusation? Like, cos I don’t want to— And then, then I guess… he’d hear this bit as well so—" GOOD. Because he would know that you're slowly tuning into an avatar of the Lonely, and he would probably try and help you!

"What do I do?" TALK TO HIM

Oh, Daisy is there!

"I, I saw someone come out, so I, I thought that, you know…"

"Do you want something?"

"No, I’m ju— Just ignore me. Continue with… whatever." She just doesn't want to be alone...

"Melanie’s out, and John and Basira are still off. Bit worried, but they can take care of themselves, you know?"

"Again not really. No-one really talks to me anymore." Ouch-

"Cos they reckon you’re working for the bad guy?"

"Pretty much. Don’t you?" "Oh, I mean, you’re definitely working for something evil. But so are we." That's... not wrong.

'It doesn’t bother you?"

"Didn’t used to."

"And now?"

"Bothers me less than trying to go alone. At least now it’s on my terms. Better than being blackmailed into it." I see her point.

"They told you about Elias, right?"

"Yeah. Basira said. Don’t like him being alive. Trying not to think about it too much. Don’t want to get too angry, start to hear the blood." Understandable.

"I thought you believed him? You were doing all of his dirty work."

"Well, wasn’t willing to call his bluff. Not the same thing as believing. Just too big a risk."

"Not for Melanie."

"Well, maybe she was the only one with any sense. Even if he was telling the truth, if we all… died… There are worse things." First, that's depressing to say that. Then... I don't think that Elias lied about everyone dying too if he gets killed. I wonder how it works, though. I mean, it made sense cause he was Head of the Institute, you know (or the "beating heart" of it, as he likes to say), but now, he's technically not, but the "everyone kicks the bucket" rule still applies. Why? How does it work?

"How was it?"

"Don’t want to talk about it." Of course.

"I listened to your old statement. Wasn't your partner down there?"

"Yeah. Didn't find him."

"You don't want to get him?"

"I'm not going back." "Huh. I’d have thought you’d’ve at least tried—

""I said I don’t want to talk about it." And that's the point. I see what he's doing here. He keeps asking questions about a sensitive topic she doesn't want to talk about, so that she gets uncomfortable and leaves.

"I know. Not nice being interrogated, is it?" Oh, and it's also a petty revenge. (I probably would have done the same...)

"I’m sorry, Martin."

"It’s alright. It wasn’t you. Not really." "No, it was. I hate a lot of what I did back then. Doesn’t mean I’m not responsible for it. Doesn’t mean it wasn’t me." This is already making me like her more. Actually apologising, and taking accountabilty of what she did though she was under the influence of the Hunt. I appreciate the character development.

"So what’s this field trip they’re on?"

"They, uh, they didn’t tell you?" Oh he's not gonna like that...

"No, I— What? Daisy, where have they gone?"

"You know that town in Norway?"

"What? No… Wai— Wh-What? You don’t mean Ny-Ålesund?"

"Yeah. They reckon there’s a ritual they need to… you know."

"Yeah, but Peter didn’t even — I don’t believe this." OF COURSE HE DIDN'T TELL YOU

"For god’s sake, can he not just stay safe for like, like ten minutes?!"

"I don’t think that’s an option for him anymore."

"Yeah, I mean, sure. But he just… he doesn’t think! He always just immediately charges straight off into danger with whatever, whatever half-arsed plan oc occurs to him at the time! I don’t get it!" He's so done about his favourite idiot getting in a dangerous situation again lol

"I, I mean, it’s pretty standard stuff."

"What?"

"Used to see it all the time back in the force, especially with the sectioned. Not like there’s ‘normal’ trauma, you know, but it’s pretty common. The most important thing becomes control, engaging on your own terms. Even when it’s stupid or dangerous. Anything to not feel helpless." Oh...

"And of course for Jon’s there’s survivor’s guilt in there too. He thinks he’s not human. Makes him very… self-destructive." Yes! Exactly!

"Yeah, well, we’ve all had trauma." Which made you all do very stupid and dangerous things- "And everyone’s changed." Indeed...

"You’re… You’re pretty observant, you know."

"Detective, remember."

"Yeah, you did mention. Would have thought Basira would have had more sense, though." lol

"When Basira and I were partners, I’d see this happen sometimes. She can read a situation like no-one I know, always seems to know the right move, but for all her research she never wants to put a plan together. I think she just hates all the unknowns, the variables, contingencies… If she spots an advantage she’ll grab it and trust herself to figure out the details as she goes. It’s worked so far." I get the logic. After all, if it ain't broken, don't fix it.

"I mean, I guess. It still sounds really dangerous." Duh. But dangerous is you all do now.

"Yeah. Wanted to go with them. Protect them, but… Life’s always more complicated than that, isn’t it?

"Not really." Huh?

Okay...

It was interesting to have an outsider pov. To actually realise how scary it is. I feel so bad for that lady...

It's so sad, that most people go to the Magnus Institute to make statement for closure, to move on, and they just end up with more trauma. But she didn't even go to the Institute, she didn't wanna talk about it at all, and she still got traumatised. It's not fair.

I just imagine Jon staring from a distance like a cat does when it notices you're about to open a can of tuna. You know that weird way the light hit a cat's eyes and it looks like they glow? Yeah, with the same eyes.

Please stop doing that to random people just so that you can have a snack. At least pick people who willingly come to the Institute!

*sighs*

Also... Martin said that he's lonely. And getting comfortable with that. He really is becoming an avatar of the Lonely... I'm worried about him. I really am, cause while it was obviously going to happen, I still don't like that, and it's only gonna get worse...

Peter Lukas' plan is working and I don't like this at all.

Jon and Martin really need to talk to each other. So that they can help each other. Cause they're both like "ugh, he's doing something stupid and dangerous, how do I stop that" about the other. JUST TALK. PLEASE.

I'm so normal and totally not insane about them. I'm getting keychains of them for my birthday if I play my cards right.

It was nice to hear Daisy. Which is a sentence I wouldn't even have believed barely a season ago. I like her character development.

I can't wait to see what happens next. It's stressful and frustating, but in a good way, you know? I'm already halway through the season, and I just know I'm not ready for the rest of the season, I can feel it, but it sure is gonna be entertaining.

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