I can't hear you! It's too dark in here!

My name is Jordan. I fell in a fountain once.

[awesome-picz]

[0bwoy]

When your car breaks down and a kind stranger helps out. In more ways than one.

[oneoakdutch]

wuuuut LMFAOOO!

[unclefather]

[floozys-deactivated20180908]

daniel radcliffe: *tries his best to widen his horizons and take on various interesting and different roles*

me: look at the harry potter man go

[imthe7deadlysins-deactivated201]

Don't fucking cheat on someone

[rubudubu-deactivated20150209]

A man just walked past me and said “excuse me, but you look very nice tonight darlin” I said thank you and he said you’re welcome and walked off. And that is how you compliment a woman without harassing them

[sailorcrystalgemplaneteer]

No, that is still unsolicited, and thus, harassment. No amount of “darlins” is gonna make me not want to punch your ass for coming on to me without provocation.

[rubudubu-deactivated20150209]

GOD

SHUT UP

UR SO STUPID

[randobambo]

[x]

[ughjeez-deactivated20161007]

THISS IS SO FUNNY TO ME

[weloveshortvideos]

this is the cutest video ive seen today

[keepya-head-up]

I dun knooo

[thetime-ishere-deactivated20180]

His little glasses and little accent and little voice awwwwwwwwww

[cleothegoldfish]

Batman did it. Like he was sticking with that lie 😂😂😂

[kyssthis16]

Liddo glasses. Awwwwwwww

[babyphattracksuit-deactivated20]

I watched this 50 times

[snottygirl]

@upset-inertia it’s baht mahn

[deeplifequotes]

It’s amazing how 3 minutes with the wrong person feels like an eternity, yet 3 hours with the right one, feels like only a moment.

Unknown (via deeplifequotes)

[yafpot]

in alcohol’s defense I’ve done some pretty dumb shit while completely sober too

[aydol]

GUYS HELP ME SOMETHING REALLY FUCKING WEIRD HAPPENED I NEED AN EXPLAINATION THAT IS NOT ALIENS

i was just sitting on my laptop chilling and what not with the tv on in the backround

When the tv sound cuts out so i look up at the tv

THATS A PICTURE OF MY LAPTOP ON MY BED TAKEN RIGHT WHERE I WAS SITTING WHAT DO I DO ?????

[1998-2019-deactivated20190419]

u dead

[premium-xo-deactivated20170513]

u hella ded

[sadgrl]

[anotherstateofmind67-deactivate]

[weloveshortvideos]

He tripped out

[wc-sr-deactivated20180306]

She literally said something in feline. She had to have

[nineprotons]

This certainly got my cats’ attention.

[naomster]

it looks so betrayed “i thought we were friends human”

[aozorapedaru]

She really must say something crazy, cause my two kitties came running towards my notebook and were searching for the source crazily.

[timelord-and-fishcustard]

Oh my god, I played this video and my cat looked at me SO FUCKING SHOCKED AND HE IS STILL STARING AT ME LIKE I SAID SOMETHING OFFENSIVE

[themadborntoday-deactivated2015]

LISTEN UP YALLS

•If you say “meh” high pitched it would mean “help”. Kittens use it a lot to get their mother’s attention before they open their eyes.

•If you do a tongue roll with a sharp “reah” at the end it would mean “come here”. My sister and I use it to call upon stray cats.

•body language is hard to describe. You usually need a tired and relaxed look to seem calm and purrsuasive (lol).

•tongue rolls with a slightly closed mouth can resemble purring in a way that helps attract cats.

•what the person used, or said, was a “help” and “I love you”. The cats body language dictates that it is surprised that a human could use this ability.

•we can’t fully communicate without tails and whiskers.

GO SAVE CATS NOW

[powerkeys]

…. You speak cat?

[unsouring-deactivated20160511]

person: *points at leg* why is your leg shaking

me: well my pal my buddy I am full of anxiety

[tastefullyoffensive]

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When you have to force yourself to smile. 🔊 (via loopdeloops)

[bombing]

one of my favorite things is when you give a baby your finger and they hold on to it as tight as they can. it’s funny because they don’t even come close to having the amount of muscle power i do. do you really think you can hold me here haha. i’ll crush you