PULL YOUR CHIN UP !

there's a name for girls of your kind, but you )

[androphobias]

oh yeah i also updated the shipping part in my rules  but it’s not required to reread or anything i just had to add that when it comes to t.enmaki or t.enkaede i’m exclusive with farore @/rosethroat & ivorytracing there 

[androphobias]

pseudoneiric‌:

oh, this is so sweet she might actually die. chabashira is so energetic and adoring, like a puppy, or perhaps like a big guard dog who can’t stop wagging her tail even when she’s supposed to be on the lookout for intruders. lilian laughs, the sound low and sinister. “well, if you believe we’re bonding, i’ve no reason to question you.” she laughs again, mischief dancing in golden eyes as she creeps slightly closer, if only to gauge her friend’s reaction better. “say, have we bonded enough for me to call you chabashira-chan? or how about just tenko? oh, how intimate!”

lilian claps her hands together in delight, grin stretched wide across her face. her previous complaints are all gone in light of this gentle teasing. really, she could run a thousand miles if chabashira’s reaction is as good as she hopes it’ll be.

chabashira must have said the right thing. or she must have said something good. either way, she takes lilian’s laughter as a win, tone aside. her grin turns goofy, hardly fazed by how sinister it actually sounds - lilian agreed that they’re bonding! - and only falters when the other girl creeps closer. it’s not that she minds. boundaries aren’t something that chabashira has been particularly good at, nor has she ever felt the need to hold a large personal bubble of her own, so the most that happens is a pink tinge to her cheeks. 

“ah, you’re a little...” she trails off, unsure of how to finish the sentence. close doesn’t feel like the right word. whatever she was going to say, her mind blanks when lilian comments on how intimate this is. calls her by her given name. 

the reaction is immediate. if the pink to her cheeks wasn’t obvious before, then it is now, and she squeaks. “intimate?” her hands pull up to protect her face - instinct, by now. “i-intimate?! tenko’s not sure if she’d say that!” her voice trails off into a whine. is it rude, to cover her face? would it be rude, to let lilian see how flustered she is? the compromise here, clearly, is to peek through her hands. “you can call tenko what you - whatever you want! really!” 

[androphobias]

aslo uhhh. coughs!!!! ;)

[androphobias]

tag dump but its pt 2 

[androphobias]

long overdue new tags that hopefully will be less ugly. i refuse to write anything until theyre out here. once again mostly girl in red lyrics for the lesbianism

[androphobias]

i rise 

[androphobias]

pseudoneiric‌:

this isn’t intellectual discussion, far from it. it’s not stimulating, and chabashira has raised more questions than offered any real insight. and yet, lilian quite likes this. likes the way she tries so valiantly to cheer her up, likes that she’s restless enough to play with the grass. it makes her feel like she has a sister. or a friend.

“they are, aren’t they,” she hums. one hand comes up to brush some sweat-damp hair off her face. she’d tie it up, but she hates the shape of her face. it’s too angular, too masculine. she wishes suddenly to take the shears to it, to snip-snip her frustrations away. and she’d look in the mirror and hate herself even more. she’d cry, and the oceans would overflow with her tears.

the private lamentation does well to cheer her, and she can’t help but laugh softly. “how would you recommend i think of this, then, chabashira-san, if not an exercise in self-love?” she laughs low and sinister, gloved hand reaching to conceal her lips. “would you say we’re bonding?”

truth be told, this is all a little confusing, but chabashira is nothing if not a supporter of girls. and lilian is a girl. it’s not like she’s going to understand every girl she talks to, and it’s not as though she’s enough of a thinker to be good at this, but the simpler questions make her perk up. “bonding?” 

“tenko would like to believe so!” there’s a new energy to her tone, and one leg begins to bounce, slightly. she wants to believe that this isn’t just exercise if she’s spending it with another girl. as far as she’s concerned, they’re friends, if just for this time that they’ve spent together. “every moment spent with someone else is important!”

“what does lilian-san think, though?” she’s careful to be polite - it’s usually more polite to refer to foreigners by given name, anyway. “self-love is important too, of course! to be completely honest, tenko might have gotten a little lost in this conversation, but this is bonding, isn’t it?” 

[truthate]

hey ! these tend to go around a bit faster so like or reblog if you’d be interested in interacting with a s.huichi s.aihara of n.drv3 blog ! this is a sideblog , i follow from @duelrushed​ !

[androphobias]

kuweon replied to your post “chabouma rights <3 <3 <3 ”

but what about tenkleon rights mx beanie

im sorry but chabouma is my otp now so im dropping all our secret smut threads

[androphobias]

chabouma rights <3 <3 <3 

[androphobias]

pseudoneiric‌:

lilian follows suit. she’s exhausted for no real reason, and she assumes she must chalk it up to the hormones. everything is because of the hormones, is it not? it’s why she’s always so tired, why her body aches, why her emotions are going haywire. there’s something in her body eating away at who she used to be. it should be joyous. she can feel her skin crawling.

it’s too fast, and not fast enough.

she collapses onto the grass; her skirt rides up a bit, but she’s wearing shorts underneath. it doesn’t stop her from yanking it down. it doesn’t stop her from feeling embarrassed.

“i’m… i’m sorry.” the words come out breathless, lilian’s lungs burning from the jogging. “i know it must be… frustrating, to run with someone who’s so slow. i just… have been feeling a bit unwell as of late.” she smiles, pulls her knees in a bit closer. tucks a lock of hair behind her ear and feels her chest warm at how she can even do that. “chabashira-…san. do you believe that training the body can train the mind as well? do you think that one can grow to love themselves if they only train harder? is everything in life so… fruitless? tick off a box, train every day, and you’ll have anything you’d like. it’s ridiculous. it’s… depressing. don’t you think?”

wide eyes follow lilian’s descent, more concerned than anything. the previous silliness that had come from her dramatics fades and turns into something else, but tenko was never the best at reading moods. her brows furrow, she listens, and then she thinks. 

“those are some very strange questions so suddenly!” is the conclusion that she comes to. not depressing, not needless. strange. she doesn’t believe that anything a girl like lilian could say something without reason, but this definitely isn’t tenko’s forte. “first, tenko’s going to assure you that running with you isn’t frustrating, even if your dramatics can be silly. it’s enjoyable!” which leaves the brunt of lilian’s questions for tenko to answer. she takes some time before she can think of a response. 

“tenko believes that training one’s body can help with mental state, but she isn’t sure if that’s what you meant. exercise can’t help every problem!” it’s neo-aikido that had given tenko a place in society, and neo-aikido that had given her mental discipline, sure, but... training alone wasn’t all that tenko had done. “and training can’t completely help you to love yourself, either. even in healthy states of mind...” tenko doesn’t think that it’s fruitless, or ridiculous, or depressing, but she can’t deny reality. one hand fiddles with the grass. “is this how you think all the time? oooh, is this ticking off a box, for you? tenko doesn’t want you to think of this like that.” 

[androphobias]

@coldcaring​ sent: There's a tap on Tenko's shoulder, and behind her is one of the newer Ultimates, an underclassman. Amanda looks a bit nervous, but tries to keep herself causal. "You're... Chabashira-senpai, right? I was wondering if... you could help me learn self defense? I probably shouldn't only depend on my knife when it comes to human attackers... So..." 

surprise is what comes immediately. people don’t usually approach tenko first! males keep away (good) and other girls don’t particularly go out of their way to talk to her, so to see a little underclassman grabbing for her attention is strangely pleasant. still, her head tilts to the side as she listens, and as soon as amanda is done talking, she begins to bounce on her feet, overcome with an explosive excitement. 

“of course tenko can teach!” there’s no questioning the comment about the knife. plenty of people in this school have knives, she thinks. “tenko’s taught tons of girls before!” that also isn’t a lie - part of being a hero of justice with her master was teaching some girls the fundamentals of her neo-aikido in order to enact revenge on boys. it doesn’t apply here, but the point is that she has some experience! “aaah, it’s been a while!” 

tenko only vaguely recognizes this girl and knows her name. they’re in different classes and grades, after all. it doesn’t make her any less enthusiastic for this opportunity.

[fightasone]

Anonymously send me your favorite detail about how I play my character.

I will publish and respond OOC.

[androphobias]

@amnesiacdreams​ sent: “ need a hand? ” || sentence starters that i dont feel like grabbing! 

“absolutely not!” chabashira’s never been so sure in her life that she’d rather die than take amami’s hand, or... help in general, actually! even if she’d tripped in the hall, made an absolute fool out of herself, and is now laying down instead of even attempting to get up. because getting up would be a win for amami, probably. 

“tenko can’t take your hand... it’s dirty! dirtier than this floor, so tenko will take the latter as her option until you leave!” she certainly is doing that. just... laying there. “if amami-san is trying to trick tenko into weakening her neo-aikido, then it isn’t happening.” 

[androphobias]

people I’d like to get to know better.

one   /   (  alias / name  ) :  beanie/bean/beans/beanbean/beanz/beano are all things ive been called for real 

two   /   (  birthday  ) :  sep 5

three   /   (  zodiac sign  ) :  virgo babey

four   /   (  height  ) :  taller than you

five   /   (  hobbies  ) :  all i know is discord rp eat hot chip post on ao3 instead of homework and lie 

six   /   (  favourite colour  ) :  dark blue, but i like most pastel colors too! they’re easy on the eyes

seven   /   (  favourite books  ) :  do the paperback homestuck comics count lmfao (inb4 anyone asks it was my special interest last year yes i know theres things wrong with it YES i like things critically)

eight   /   (  last song listened to  ) :  uuhhhhh upgrade in the bmc broadway album specifically 

nine   /   (  last film or show watched  ) :  ?? does critical role count? its just youtube.... if this question must mean specifically tv, then i guess pmmm magia record?

ten   /   (  inspiration for muse  ) :  inspiration for picking the muse up? i dunno man it doesn’t look like there’s any good tenko content out there so SOMEONE’S gotta do it. and also bc i wuv her tenko’s my biggest comfort character i write her all the time in fic already

eleven   /   (  story behind url  ) :  well for starters ive already run with a ‘phobia’ theme across the majority of my blogs (animotophobia, scriptophobic) and ‘androphobia’ is the fear of men. so it’s pretty on the nose there. but i think... she probably qualifies for androphobia anyway ASJDKASJDHSAJD

Tagged by:  @pseudoneiric pan da ceo!!! Tagging: steal it im incapable of tagging people 

[androphobias]

circumspecto‌:

   he was so lost in thought for a brief moment that he didn’t even see tenko leaning over his shoulder to look at the note in his hands. as soon as he noticed her presence, he jumped slightly and turned to face her.

   “ chabashira-san? when did you get here? ” he mumbled halfheartedly, not really caring when she had arrived, just that … if she had seen anything.

   there wasn’t anything crude in the contents of the letter. it had very messy handwriting; a child or someone with really terrible penmanship must have wrote it. therefore, it was rather unlikely that tenko could even read it. as for amami? he knew it by heart at this point.

   it was a letter from his sister, long ago. they had a game where they would ‘ send ’ each other letters back and forth to improve her writing skills. it was one of the last cherished items that he had. in addition, he had clipped a small photo of her onto the letter to remember her face forever, in case his memory gave out later in life. hopefully by then … his searches would have been completed.

amami has always been a suspicious boy. not necessarily as malicious as she considered the other males in this school, what with that usually-calm attitude ( that she was sure was some kind of facade ), but definitely suspicious. as far as she was concerned, looking at some kind of note all by himself was very suspicious behavior, and his reaction to her presence proved it! 

“tenko should be asking amami-san what he’s doing, instead!” arms crossed, head tilted, she couldn’t jump to neo-aikido immediately. as satisfying as it would be to throw him, it wouldn’t get her any answers. she’s level-headed enough in the moment to recognize that. “reading suspicious notes all by himself is exactly the kind of behavior that tenko watches out for!” okay, so maybe not that kind of behavior exactly, but the point was that it seemed he was up to no good. 

but. but, but. she hadn’t been able to read the letter in detail - too messy for her to find anything legible, which was annoying enough, but it was the photo that captured most of her interest. she also hadn’t been able to get a good look at it, but it was enough for her to recognize it as a girl. definitely suspicious! “so, what the heck are you doing, amami-san?”

[pseudoneiriic]

                                                     you knew it all along, didn’t you?                                                             it was this simple.