Hopefully this is the final post I make regarding this
I'm a 23 year old trans woman, my name is Aether/ Angel, I'm disabled, I lost my job, my mother disowned me, and she stole my entire savings account before cutting all contact.
Amidst all of this stress I started getting dependent on weed again, which resulted in me entering a compromised state and being abused by someone I considered a friend. My only source of income was / is sex work, but the sexual abuse I experienced has destroyed my body image and traumatized me to the point I can hardly do it anymore.
I had a very fruitful first post about this go around, but I still never even made back all the money my mom took from me. My roommate is currently financially dependent on me due to disabilities as well, so I'm extremely stressed and desperate for any help.
My Ko-Fi is here
For verification please reach out to my roommates @sonicaspeed123 @collared-crescent and my friend @decamarks
These are the issues I would really like help paying for:
>I barely have clothing that fits
I gained a lot of wait from being on atomoxetine, self explanatory issue
>I can just barely pay my own rent let alone rent for 2
The most money I make is from sex work which is destroying me, I don't like doing it, I don't want to do it.
>said roommate's cat, who I consider my own, has lung cancer and desperately needs surgery to remove a tumor
>I need food, I'm in the middle of working out food stamps for this month
My Discord is the_aether_system if you need to reach out for anything.
“Emotional abuse works like this: You are screamed at, and then, not knowing any better, you stand up for yourself. You think this is a way of being strong. You think this is a defense tactic.But this only provokes more screaming. Going silent provokes more screaming too, but usually it keeps the threats to the minimum. It keeps it just at screaming and not: a shove down the stairs, or order to pack your stuff and get out. So you learn how to go silent. How to play dead. How to cry without making a noise. How to swallow noise. How to wipe your cheeks, get out of the car, and go about your day. You learn. And when the screaming has stopped, when the two of you are in the car or out to dinner and they’re all smiles, all asking for favors, all questions, you are still hurt and annoyed and want to ask them, how? How can you speak to me like that? How can you pretend you did not say those things? How can you have forgotten? But you’ve learned. So you listen to, “Can I borrow your key”s and “how was your day”s and you play dead. You swallow the noise. And sometimes it doesn’t matter who is speaking to you, it doesn’t matter if they’re a friend, it doesn’t matter if their criticism is constructive, it doesn’t matter. You’ve learned. Any sort of speaking, any raising of the voice, any insult and you play dead.”
the shit you do to make a dying phone work when you dont wanna buy a new phone is amazing. my phone no longer charges unless i plug and unplug the charger exactly ten times & then flip the charger around then it works. I dont want to say i have to fuck the port a little bit first but i have to fuck the port a little bit first
By my count we're at 6 accounts (overwhelmingly transfems) terminated in the last ten minutes, most if not all with the same "For any reason, or none at all", bullshit justification.
Tumblr staff is currently running a banwave of trans women, terminating them without justification.
I've been told of more than ten more girls banned, in the same timeframe. @yay-bunnies was banned too.
I've been told that all followers of a now terminated blogs were banned, so it's safe to assume that someone on staff just went down the list of a tgirl's blog and banned all of them.
@staff is transmisogynistic and currently mass banning trans women. Make sure they never hear the end of it. Raise hell like yall did a few days ago. Staff is mass banning transfems without reason.
All evidence points to staff having mass banned all followers of @kidnappbait, and all of them recieving the same "any reason, or none at all" message.
Staff is now just running down hit lists of transfems.
Please help my friend. They’re going to bomb the tents again. I’m out of options, I don’t know how else to get people to donate. I just don’t know what else people need to see.
Those four campaigns not reaching their goal is serious. These people have been living in horrible conditions for more than 300 days. They've been enduring genocide for more than 300 days. Enough is enough. Please donate to any of them. Share whatever posts I have about them. Keep them circulating. We need to meet that goal in time. I don't want to leave them behind like this.
Donate to Momen Al Ostaz, Abdullah Ameen, Doaa's family, and Mahmoud Nedal.
We are still way behind on our goal, and it's been almost 24 hours.
[plain text: We are still way behind on our goal, and it's been almost 24 hours. end plain text.]
as an addict who is deeply unsatisfied with the current model of addiction, something i've started doing is pay more attention to my language.
i know, from my personal experience, that addiction often comes from desperation. every addict i have ever spoken to has something they were desperately trying, and failing, to fix for years, before they turned to illegal substances as the solution — chronic pain or loneliness or trauma or alienation or or or.
so now, whenever my brain helpfully supplies the phrase "addicted to x," to talk about a compulsive and maybe even subconscious pull towards something that's not an illegal substance, i try to swap that around and start from the craving, or the desperation, depending on the intensity. it has been looking like this:
"addicted to sugar" -> craving something sweet / desperate for calories
"addicted to my phone" -> craving restful and easily available entertainment
"addicted to dopamine" -> needing rest and fun and joy, probably unknowingly on the brink of burnout
"addicted to other people's approval" -> desperate for meaningful, self esteem-building connection
it's a neat little rhetorical trick that helps me from falling into judgment and contempt when talking about my own, and other people's, unhealthy habits. there's no way to condemn other people's addiction (real or imagined) without feeling superior about our own self control.
and like. why are we doing that. what does it serve, politically and ideologically, other than to satisfy our need for superiority. why are we patting ourselves on the back for how good we are at abstaining from pleasure. what are we, christians?
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