Take the Long Way Home, Part Seven
āāāāāāāāāāāāā-
āI spy somethingā¦green!ā
You chuckled, this was too easy. āIs it Jaken?ā
āThere are many green things,ā Jaken protested, āwhy do you assume she refers to me and not the grass or trees or-ā
āBut she was right; itās you, Master Jaken!ā Rin happily announced.
The small demon was about to protest further but Lord Sesshomaru had halted and Jaken collided into the back of his leg.
Sesshomaru ignored him. āInuyasha is near.ā
āOh! do you wish to confront him, my Lord? He would surely benefit from a humbling altercation with yourself; he is far too arrogant for his own good. It would do him well to be reminded he is but a half-demon!ā
You waited anxiously for Sesshomaruās decision. If he decided to intercept his brother then perhaps you could speak to Kagome about crossing back to your own time. It might be tricky to do with the two brothers quarreling, but it could be your only chance.
āNo. I have no business with him at present.ā
āUm, excuse me, my lordā¦ā
Sesshomaru turned his head to glance back at you, waiting for you to continue.
āI know you donāt have reason to go, but do you think, perhaps, we might go pay a visit so that I may speak to Kagome?ā
Sesshomaru glared at you for a moment as Jaken gaped at your insolence, but before the steward could chastise you, his lordship spoke, āI said I had no business with him.ā
You had been in his company long enough to know this was his restrained way of telling you to drop the subject, but, in desperation, you pressed further. āPlease, Lord Sesshomaru, Kagome is likely the only one to know how I might-ā
At this, Sesshomaru turned to face you fully, and snapped, āIf youāre so concerned with meeting that woman then go find them yourself.ā
You recoiled. "Iām sorry, I just-ā
āYouāre not needed here anyway,ā he snarled. āJust leave. Go back to your own time.ā At this, he turned from you and stormed off.
Jaken and Rin stood in stunned silence, looking from Sesshomaru to yourself, unsure of what to do. Even Ah-Un had instinctively taken a few steps back at the venomous outburst. Sesshomaru had never spoken to you like that before. He had always been a man of few words, but the words he had shared with you before had never felt hateful. Your throat constricted and you could feel your face getting hot; Rin and Jakenās anxious glances your way did nothing to ease your nerves. Theyād been put in an awkward spot, and it was your fault. They couldnāt defy Sesshomaru, but you knew they pitied you and were hesitant to turn and leave. Feeling bad enough at the position youād put them in, you decided to spare them of having to make the choice to abandon you. You looked to them for a moment, gave them a pained smile, and slinked away.
*************************************
Night had fallen at last. The remainder of the day had been spent walking in a tense silence. Now and then, Rin had let a whimper escape, but she had done her best to limit her outward emotion. Now they rested by the fire Jaken conjured with the enchanted staff, the two disciples leaned against Ah-Un as they ruminated over the happenings.
Sesshomaru was not with them. After dictating they rest there for the evening, he had slipped away, and none were confident enough to chase after him. This was a small blessing for him. He didnāt want their concerned looks; didnāt need their apprehensive eyes boring into him with that hounding question: āwhy were you so cruel to herā.
He stood on an outcropping, looking out at the night sky. He remembered her telling Rin that, in her time, there were humans who dedicated their lives to these celestial bodies. An aching pain swelled in his chest, and he winced. Those humans of her time, they had travelled through the stars and arrived at the moon, but they needed only look to the sky to see their destination. (Y/N) hadnāt known where Inuyashaās group was, nor did she possess Sesshomaruās keen sense of smell to be able to track them. She would not have found them. She would be lost and alone, with no one there to defend her against the cruelties and dangers of the world.
He wrestled with this reality; it was none of his concern what became of her, and yet he could not put the thought from his mind, could not snuff out the worry that plagued him, could not silence the shame he feltā¦
******************************
You hadn't anticipated the terror you would experience upon being alone at night, though, to be fair, you hadn't had time to consider the repercussions of your decision to go it alone. You no longer had the security of companions. No longer could rest your weary feet by riding atop Ah-Un. No longer had the the protection of Sesshomaru.
You stopped next to a large oak tree. You could feel panic swelling inside yourself, threatening to split you apart. The world swirled around you, it felt like you were dying. In desperation you crouched down and rested your head on your knees as you tried to keep your breathing steady.
After a minute of this you stabilized slightly and raised your head, but then you felt the cold drop off water splash against the bridge of your nose. Rain. As if things couldn't get worse.
You were incapable of gathering the energy to do anything more, it felt useless to even try. In exhaustion, you collapsed back against the trunk of the oak. At least nothing could sneak up on you with the large tree behind you. Its foliage partially shielded you from the storm brewing, but, between the wind and the droplets that did reach you, a shiver coursed through you.
A crack of thunder broke out, sounding as though it had discharged right by your ear. Panic raced once more through you. You could no longer contain it. You collapsed into yourself, weeping; you would die here.
*******************************
It hadnāt taken Sesshomaru long to trace his way back and follow (Y/N)ās scent. He soon found her huddled and whimpering under a large oak. He observed for a few moments, hidden from sight by the flora of the forest and the shadows of night. He had expected to find her and bring her back. Simple. However, confronted with the raw emotion of her dejected spirit, he found himself rooted to his spot. What should he say? Would she even want to go back with him? Would she demand he escort her to Kagome so that she could leave this world forever? The thought pained him, but he mentally chastised himself for it. What was it to him what this woman chose to do? Sure, he had become accustomed to her and so had wanted to insure she was safe, but he hadnāt really cared that she was goneā¦
He wondered what story she might have been telling Rin this evening if he hadnāt lashed out at her. She did well with the girl.
He stepped from his covering and approached (Y/N), halting just in front of her. He gazed down and observed as her shoulders trembled, her crying muffled from her face being buried into her knees. She hadn't heard him approach. Between her own lamentations, the rumbling thunder, and howls of the wind, she had heard nothing.
Her crying sputtered to a stop, and for a moment she did not move. Hesitantly, she lifted her head and met his gaze. They stayed like that, eyes locked, neither moving, until Sesshomaru abruptly offered his hand.
************************************
You stared at his hand for a second, in shock, until the realization you were being offered salvation dawned on you. You eagerly took his hand, and he pulled you up. However, he didn't seem to know his own strength and as you were brought to your feet the momentum caused you to stumble forward into him. You were pressed against his chest with his cold plate of armor digging into you uncomfortably, while his kimono radiated with the heat from his body and his fur stole tickled at your cheek. Your mind froze and so did your body; the scent of rain and wet earth clung to him, and the musky aroma quickened your heart. Glancing up at him, you saw him peering down at you.
You had expected him to look cross about you colliding into him, but instead his face looked almost gentle as he asked, āAre you alright?ā
At the realization you were still pressed against him, you hastily stepped back and averted your eyes as you replied, āYes, Iām fine. Sorry, I-ā. The fur he kept round his shoulder was being draped around your neck.
āWe should get going. That is, if you want toā¦ā
The uncertainty in his voice was so unfamiliar. He was always self-assured, never questioning himself. And yet, here he was before you, a mere human, testing the water to see if you might acquiesce to his request. Never before had he been so vulnerable with you.
āYes, Iād like that, my lord.ā
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