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[opportunistic-chicanery]

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est. May 2021, moved Oct 2021

[archived-chicanery]

sliding-into-space​:

Coop withdrew his hand and rolled his eyes as his partner. “Hey, come on dude, don’t be like that. I’ll always be here to help you, we’re partners. But I want Slider to have a normal and fun childhood that I didn’t get to have because my uncle made me work all the time. So that means letting the kid go trick or treating.” He explained. “You’re a genius to figure out how to make particle resistant glass, and I want to be a part of that, but Slider is also important to me, so I have to split my time.” He gave his partner a small smile hoping he understood.

“Coop, I said it’s fine,” he insisted, concealing his anxiety with a hard cough. He really didn’t need Coop trying to be soft on him right now. “You go show up the rusty fender. The windows will keep until tomorrow… probably.” He shut his eyes and frowned, turning to look as stoic as possible. “By tonight, the little terror’s bound to be running up the walls on sugar. If that doesn’t keep the ghosts out… hmph.”

[archived-chicanery]

sliding-into-space​:

Slider’s face lit up and he tilted his head. “Woah, I didn’t know they did that, makes sense though.” He looked annoyed as he was forced to lean forward as Hacker typed and refused to let go of his arm, even when he gently tried to pull it out of his grasp. “What are you thinking?” He asked carefully, eyeing his father figure.

“It’s time for your education,” he declared getting out a cushion and resting it on his knee. “When your dad rules all of Cyberspace, he’s going to need a chef technician. And you’re the first and only borg in line for the job.”

“I remember a certain someone who wouldn’t keep their trap shut until I explained to you how to make your own goldfish.” He gestured towards the keyboard. “Now’s your chance.” He declared, ignoring the fact Slider asked that question nearly half a decade ago.

[archived-chicanery]

sliding-into-space​:

Coop gently pushed the blackboard away with a small smile. “Of course I’ll help you.” He put his hand on Hacker’s with a small pat before grinning with a shake of his head. “But if we don’t take that kid trick or treating he’s going to be rioting for days. Why don’t we work on it before and after we take him? Sound fair?” He tried to reason gently.

“Do not talk to me like a child, Coop,” Hacker tapped, sitting up indignantly. He suddenly felt extremely foolish but that didn’t stop him from being terrified all the same. “Well, go on then and play with the little tike,” he said, holding his head up to save face. “Meanwhile I’ll be designing and contructing a lead particle resistant glass and replacing all our windows.”

[archived-chicanery]

sliding-into-space​:

Slider shook his head, staring at the thing. It looked almost clinical with how bare it appeared to be. “A testing site? What’s that?” He asked tilting his head in confusion. He’d never heard of them before, which made sense considering he didn’t exactly match up to be approved for Cyberspace’s secrets.

“A blank site used to test code before it gets merged with the rest of the site syntax. If code malfunctions, setting it loose on a site can cause absolutely chaos!” His eyes practically glowed at the thought. “And it’s come practically gift wrapped for me.”

With one hand still around Slider’s wrist he reached for his keyboard. It was obviously he was purposefully try to keep the boy from running off mid sentence. “With just a little bit of work I can hijack this one and we can have ourselves a bit of fun. With any luck Marbles will warp through and I’ll finally have that bubble brain popped.”

[archived-chicanery]

perceiivent​:

In retrospect, immediately throwing caution to the metaphorical wind and testing the limits of how disconnected from his world he was probably wasn’t a grand idea. As the last remnants of his strongest connection to the Eye finally sever, at least one camera swinging to face him before going down, he fumbles in his pocket for a tape recorder, shoving himself to his feet and brandishing it at the man approaching. “Oh, you think I wanted to get thrown out into God knows where?” Jon snaps back, holding on to the ancient piece of technology like an anchor, and raising it like a weapon. 

This wasn’t his timeline, damn the Spiral. Damn Helen. Damn himself, everything. “I don’t know where I am. Do you think I would come to… To…” He gestures around, before continuing on. “Nevermind, why don’t you just tell me where I am?” Normally, using a Compulsion first was not the way Jon would handle things, but he was extremely worried, both at the fact that he had no idea where he was, and that he couldn’t See. Melanie would yell at him, tell him to use his brain, but… “Who are you?” 

“I couldn’t give a scrapped circuit board what you want,” Hacker retorted, looking down with distaste at the little box in his hand. “If that thing isn’t filled with leaden projectiles driven by rapidly expanding gas I’m going to be very disappointed.” He could already tell it wasn’t. 

With one hand, he grabbed the man by the cheekbones and gave him a rough shove backwards onto the ground. “The Hacker takes orders from no one. I’ll be asking the questions here. The organic will lay still and keep quite if he wants to keep his body parts intact.”

He turned back to the hangar and let out a roar that even from that distance shook the glass in the windows. “BUZZ! DELETE! GET OUT HERE NOW!”

[archived-chicanery]

perceiivent​:

“Speaking your mind is good,” Elias says, watching as he practices the look. It was… Surely getting there, and would need a little bit of work, but it was a start. “Everything might tell you otherwise, but you are sentient and able to form your own thoughts, aren’t you? Those should be shared, if you feel strongly one way or the other.” 

In one way or another, it was a ploy on his part to try and tempt the Eye to Hacker, try and get his entity to sink it’s teeth into something new, upcoming, something that it could find fuel from. “If you need, I always have ways of assisting.” The Eye could force him to speak, to spill every thought that he had. Sentience was funny like that. Deciding to test the waters, Elias begins to straighten his tie, the force, the static of the Compulsion building before he asks, “What is it that you want most?” 

“R-right. Speaking my mind.” He smiled a little, taking it all in, but not really ready to but it into action quite yet. “Y-you’re right. I’m a fully functioning borg, one of the most complex simulations in the known cyberuniverse. I have thoughts.” He coughed hard. 

He knew these things, he didn’t have to be told. Sure, it hadn’t always felt that way where he came from. After all, most of his specs were a copy paste from that of his creator, Marbles’s which meant most thoughts he had, his creator was always a step or two ahead of. And being only assistant technician meant his opinions didn’t matter much.  

He turned his gaze towards Elias as he offered to help. “Oh, I’m sure that’s not necessary.” If there was one thing that made him uncomfortable quick it was being dragged into things before he was ready. He liked to take his own pace. 

Hacker suddenly found himself frozen in place, staring at Elias as he felt the sensation of the world around him seeming to melt away into black. His expression was vaguely pained, as if he were reliving a bad memory. His mouth hung open slightly and he started to mutter something inaudible before a sudden convulsion caused him to fall out of his seat and collapse in spasms on the floor of the office. 

[archived-chicanery]

[archived-chicanery]

@perceiivent​

“I’ll never understand what makes you people think intruding on the domain of a diabolic despot is a good idea,” Hacker yapped as he trampled out through the ramp of his ship. The Wreaker’s monitors had picked up yet another straggler and he was ready to go out and give whoever it was a thorough Northern Frontier style welcome. 

“I know it can’t be because I’ve neglected my duty to cause you all sufficient misery and despair. So do you not watch the news, or is your system syntax in need of a serious rescripting?” He was about to reach out and yank whoever it was by the collar, but stopped once he got a better look at them. 

“Hm... nevermind. You’re one of those Earth...” He stopped himself from saying ‘brat’, a term he’d gotten all too used to lately when referring to the denizens of the real world. “Folk... Well? What are you doing here?” 

[archived-chicanery]

perceiivent​:

Gazes turn on the other man, save the physical gaze, skimming his thoughts. A grin curves onto his features, the fact that he thought an unassuming physique to be hindering was laughable at best. He doesn’t look for too long, however, nodding his appreciation at the attempt to mirror instead. “It has promise.” Much more work needed to be done, but it was a start. 

“You can use everything that you have now to your advantage, you know,” he starts, waving a hand up and down, gesturing at Hacker. “Make yourself seem smaller, pass through undetected. Or, you could always surprise them, do something bold, let whatever you’re feeling happen and allow it to run its course.” 

Hacker let out an awkwardly shrill laugh at the first suggestions. Passing under the radar is what he’d been trying to do his whole life, and it hadn’t done much for him yet. His second attempt seemed more sensical, but was easier said than done in his case. 

“Y-you’re telling me to speak my mind?” he translated. “Golly.” He shrank at the thought. Practically the opposite of what he’d been coded to do. It looks like he truly come under new management. “Well, I’ll try, boss.” He shut one eye, this time managing a noticeably more sinister look as he mediated on what’d just been told. 

[archived-chicanery]

@blackstardiopside​

“This entire planet is invested with little monochromatic goblins,” Hacker muttered under his breath as he saw the reflection of one such creature in his monitor. 

He spun around in his chair to face the intruder, she was the height of a child and barely came up to Hacker’s shoulder. He’d studied Earth afar for decades and never known of any intelligent species aside from humans, or ‘Earthlies’ as they were referred to colloquially in Cyberspace. 

“Who are you?” he said getting up from his seat and stalking up to the little runt. 

“And what do you think you’re doing infringing on the domain of the Hacker?”

[archived-chicanery]

Imagine a crossover with Steven Universe where Hacker gets to Earth and starts to modify gem technology so he can make his own gems. Free arm. He’d love it. 

And he’d come up with a method of recycling gems so he wouldn’t have to waste resources shattering the ones he didn’t like. He’d just shove them in the compressor and make them again. 

And they’d all call him Hacker Diamond x’D 

[archived-chicanery]

“I want to try something new with this. Now, I know it’s hard to improve on perfection, yet somehow I always manage!” He’s in an especially good mood today.

[naughtyandnicerpmemes]

[lespoopypodle]

Motherboard and Dr. Marbles creating Hacker:

“

If about to do something evil:

Don’t

“

I️ don’t think it worked

[archived-chicanery]

Headcanons from the latest AU by yours truly and @sliding-into-space. I guess we’ll call it Kings of Cyberspace AU. The basic idea being that instead of going against Coop first, Hacker chose to go for Motherboard first as soon as he initially received the commission for the Transformatron. Things go about the same as in canon, he gets exiled and drained. But without Coop having been betrayed, he goes to the Northern Frontier and finds a near death Hacker. This puts him firmly in his corner and he vows to be his partner forever. 

-When Coop finds him in the Northern Frontier, he chastises him for always feeling like he has to do things alone. He makes him promise to share things with him from now on and he’ll always support him. 

-There is only one throne in the throne room and they both share it. Hacker seats in the seat and Coop has his legs over the arm rest. Hacker tries to get him to sit normal next to him so they can look more dignified, but he always ends up in that position. 

-With Marbles and Motherboard no longer around Coop and Hacker get married and force everyone in Cyberspace to attend. Hacker adores his new husband because every victory in his life they’ve won together. He would literally give him anything he wanted. Coop decides to ask for a kid for the two of them. 

-Although Hacker still doesn’t want a kid, he respects that Coop does want one and makes Slider everything he thinks Coop will like. 

-Hacker loves Slider more openly because Coop not ditching him has made him feel not stupid for showing affection. Like with Coop he will do anything for Slider. If Slider wanted candy, he would rip it out of the hands of a dying child to give to him (and happily). Slider has a whole wing of Control Central for his toys. His official title is the Prince of Cyberspace. 

-Hacker still has the Encryptor Chip with Motherboard in it which he’s kept in a safe. Marbles and some other important people who he thinks may go against him are in dungeons he had built in the Northern Frontier. Occasionally he will take out the chip and gloat to it. 

-On one occasion, he gets distracted and forget to put it away. Slider enters his room and starts playing with the chip. Motherboard has the available to project thoughts and images into the heads of borgs who touch the chip and she does so to Slider in hopes of giving him a good influence. 

-Buzz and Delete are hired on to be Slider’s babysitters/playmates. Hacker considers them stupid enough not to be able to successfully backstab his family or kidnap his son. 

-Slider uses his dad’s computer and some old portal tech to open his own portal to Earth and accidentally pulls the kids in. He is thrilled to have friends who are kids and aren’t afraid of him. He keeps them a secret from Hacker who he knows will get mad. 

[archived-chicanery]

I don't know if this is okay so sorry if it's not but I really enjoy you and Sliding-into-space's rps so I was wondering what your answer to the "plot please" ask was? Thanks!

T_T thank you so much. Hearing people like our writing and portrays is like a shot of happiness into my brain. I have a couple of ideas for things I want to try in the future.

1. Hacker and Coop go on some kind of date. I don’t know if I want it to be more adventure or slice of life focused, but I think both could be really interesting. Either Hacker gets a mission from Motherboard and brings Coop along for morale support or Coop drags Hacker to a wild party. 

   -Generally more threads that show that Coop and Hacker are a great team and have fantastic chemistry even when they’re just hanging around at home. 

2. Hacker and Coop participating in a C-1 race together. Throw in some rivals for Hacker to yell at and scheme against. It think it would be super fun to show off the duality of his personality back when he was still “good” but starting to stray a little. 

3. This is really just a vague idea, but something in the main verse at the present time or near future where Coop confronts Hacker somehow and really rips him a new one or forces some kind of character development out of him. Will have to ask Sliding-into-space about her opinions on how it will happen, but I love the idea of really pushing Hacker’s character. 

   -To add to this, maybe some kind of situation where they’re both stuck somewhere (an island or some other dangerous site/situation) and they need to work together again even though they hate enough other now and maybe they start to kind of get along again just a tiny bit? Is that too self indulgent? 

@sliding-into-space you’re going to have to tell me what you think of these