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♤Maya♤ | filipino•aroace•she/they | An aro side-blog for all my aro ranting needs. | PFP made with this Picrew |

[aro-bird]

My name's Maya and welcome to my aro/queer focused side-blog!

Quick facts about me:

Am Filipino

Am living in the Philippines

Am an adult

Am aroace

Am multiply disabled

Am struggling with SJS

[annabelle--cane]

if i may say one thing about in-community tumblr aspec discourse. I think We As A Broad Community have a real tendency to get tunnel vision and severely over-estimate how good groups just adjacent to our own groups have it. on a pretty regular rotation I'll see waves of posts on the varying themes of "sex-favorable asexuals are completely palatable and accepted now" "everyone's on board with asexuals and aroaces but no one can stand the idea of aroallos" "ace people are accepted just fine as long as they're 100% virginal and sex-repulsed but god forbid you have a more complex relationship with sex" "everyone loves aro activism but start saying asexual talking points and they get scared" and, comrades, none of this is the case. there is no variety of acespec or arospec person who does not experience massive barriers to even basic self-expression, and this is only somewhat better in queer-majority social spaces. certain friend circles may individually be chiller about some kinds of aspecs but this does not mean that ex. "asexual perverts are too normalized," aphobia towards all aspecs is still the norm. let us not forget that We Live In A Society.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Online spaces have almost always been where asexual and aromantic people meet each other and organize. This is why the major online campaigns against us around ten years ago were so destructive.

It’s easy to say that cyber bullying doesn’t matter in the real world or whatever but targeted online bullying campaigns have the power to wreck entire communities and support networks.

It’s difficult to just turn off your computer when all the people who relate to this aspect of your life are in there.

I’ve definitely met other asexual and arospec people irl but it’s quite rare. And real life queer spaces are in fact often bars or kink spaces. And like bully for you if you like kink or alcohol or romance but when your entire identity is based around not feeling the feelings often associated with romance and/or sex that’s not always super fun.

And people got relentlessly mocked for bringing up this issue. Shut down. Called childish. Like okay. Fuck us for wanting a sober non sexual spot to meet other queers, right? So childish for wanting options.

I’ve been involved in the online asexual community and doing education about asexuality and aromanticism in both irl and online queer spaces for almost fourteen years now and that short period of time around 2016-2018 took a wrecking ball to my people that I feel like we’ve still barely recovered from and I’m still angry about it.

I think asexual pirates should come back. This time they’re here for your ass. And not sexually.

[teathattast]

[pupfettipaws]

happy pride month to those in the closet. to those who went back into the closet. to those who have unsupportive families, friends and relationships. those who were bullied and harassed because of their identity. those who were killed because of who they truly were and loved.

you are loved and appreciated.

[just-aro]

sometimes it's so very draining that the majority of aro content is about fictional relationships.

irl, i live alone. irl, i am disabled. irl, that intersection and my lack of interest in partnering actively makes life really hard. everything is expensive. i can't always cook when i want to or have fresh ingredients, because my symptoms don't care if I want to cut up vegetables and eat something homemade before they go bad. if I have a bad flareup and getting up is not in the cards, that's it. i have what's next to me. the lack of social support for single folks, for disabled folks, for folks whose family care is inadequate or damaging... it's impactful.

I talk about how i once visited a place with an ex partner. i mention how our relationship started because i was pressured into it, and i wasn't really into the level of seriousness and 'forever' she treated it with. everyone says it's weird that i agreed if i didn't want it to be serious. i remember being 16, saying no, and a chorus of people telling me i was stupid and immature, that her family was rich, that we would be cute and to listen to them, not my heart. my heart was saying nothing.

i look at my current age and life goals. for many of my peers, dating and marriage and eventual kids are common goals. i am watching my rights erode and trying to practice good mental hygeine. my five year goal is to be alive. my next major life milestone is a nebulous desire to find a life i can tolerate living.

being aromantic significantly impacts my day to day. i want to see aro people living their lives, and doing so with joy. i want to see aro adults making it, ones like me. i want aro people to thrive. i want to live, aromantically.

i scroll the aro tag. it's fandom and shipping and asexual posts.

[just-aro]

okay to reblog! if i didn't want folks to reblog, i would turn off their ability to do so!

[creatingblackcharacters]

In general another pet peeve of mine about whitewashing is how we're expected to believe that it was not visible to the artist.

Like, if it's maybe a tad bit lighter? Okay. I usually let that slide. God knows my mobile and my monitor look completely different, solutions ineffective so far. Maybe you're still learning skin tone vs background. Okay. I don't get upset at that.

But you had to go all the way to the other side of the color wheel for some of these whitewashings and you're gonna look me in my Black ass eyeballs and tell me you "couldn't tell". 😐 Especially when all the other colors are the exact same 😐 It's almost insulting lmao like do you really think I'm stupid enough to go for that, or are we all just socialized into knowing I'll be forced to 🤣

[creatingblackcharacters]

Visible difference, but, I can let slide with exceptions. ✅

😑 so I must truly look like Booboo the fool, to you. ❌

[t4timekeeper]

“we shouldn’t be holding indie creators to the same standards as bigger media“ i agree on principle but like this only seems to ever come up when the indie creator in question is being racist for some mysterious reason. So

[t4timekeeper]

idgaf if youre transgender stop saying the n word

[starryhoundbloo]

Shout out to my mom who explains my transition as "Having a daughterpillar turn into a Boyterfly". It doesn't erase the fact I was an adorable little girl, and also affirms my gender now. I love my mother.

[stephexmachina]

when i was a kid i was so mad all the time bc i thought someday i'd have to be somebody's wife i didn't know it was optional. is everybody reminding the young girls in their lives that it's optional.

[stephexmachina]

AND SO IS BEING SOMEBODY'S MOTHER‼️

[narcpolar]

Any character can be aromantic if you try hard enough. Be the change you want to see in the world.

[aromanticofficial]

official aromantic post

[sawed-on-shotgun]

Im glad they made up romance for stories and music but can you imagine how scary it would be to deal with all that for real

[sawed-on-shotgun]

this is a certified AROMANTIC POST!!!!!!!!!!! NO yearning on my shit..... GO ON . GET

[queerintheuk]

Just met a trans man who's going on T because he specifically wants to be bald and i'm afraid to say i think i'm just never gonna meet anyone cooler than that ever again

[kiskeronation]

having being anti death penalty as one of my core beliefs is fun because it really makes me realize how even progressive people want soooooo badly for there to be a category of people they can kill. I'm sorry but "group of people okay to kill" does not exist.

[hopepunk-humanity]

[bloggingboutburgers]

I saw someone else mention Romantic Killer and I love that anime so here's some yapping about it.

MC is definitely depicted as someone who does not need romance in her life to be happy. It is literally mentioned multiple times that, if not for the wizard making her life into a romcom and forcing her into romantic situations (which is treated as the fucked up thing it is - MC spends the whole runtime avoiding romance at all costs and spiting the wizard), she would've continued romance-less her entire life.

The only people she had gotten crushes on before were videogame characters. She befriends the love interests pushed onto her and just genuinely leaves it at that. She's also a great friend and I would give examples but that's a bit too spoiler-y.

Very good to know èwé That sounds promising! (...I'm just hoping the "she would've continued romance-less her entire life" sentence doesn't mean she somehow gets "fixed" at the end? Legit that's always a fear I have and I tend to get VERY cautious on such things. But ye TwT)

[tinyuglyworld]

HAPPY INTERNATIONAL ROMA DAY!!!!

fuck racism, shoutout to romani people

[tinyuglyworld]

left to right:

romanian roma, romanichal (england)

cale roma (spain), domari (palestine)

kale (finland), romanian roma

domari (jordan), ruska roma (russia)

turkish roma, argentinian roma