:)

she/her

[lokidokeyartichoki]

“phones are disrupting natural sleep cycles” I mean true but also bold of you to assume I had one before the tech boom lol catch me out here reading chapter books by the light of my light up pens in the third grade

[nativenews]

[cherishablematerial-deactivated]

you're laughing. charles dickens had a son named plorn and you're laughing

[mediummarketpaperback]

HE HAD A SON NAMED

WHAT

[cherishablematerial-deactivated]

Plorn

[mediummarketpaperback]

NICK I LOOKED IT UP AND SAW NOTHING OF THE SORT IS THIS A PRANK

[cherishablematerial-deactivated]

technically his name was edward but everyone called him plorn

[mediummarketpaperback]

Edward “Plorn” Dickens. my god.

[cherishablematerial-deactivated]

I have something worse

[mediummarketpaperback]

oh???

[cherishablematerial-deactivated]

[mediummarketpaperback]

imagine getting stuck with the nickname Plorn

[cherishablematerial-deactivated]

imagine getting sent to live in the Australian outback when you were sixteen

[mediummarketpaperback]

WHY WERE THEY SO CRUEL TO MY BOY PLORN

[cherishablematerial-deactivated]

I have an answer to that one too

[cherishablematerial-deactivated]

[cherishablematerial-deactivated]

[cogentranting]

The face of a man whose father nicknamed him Plorn.

[elodieunderglass]

Born without a groove 😔

[linguisticparadox]

[micro-usb-deactivated20230625]

Dudes rock

[deathgasmic]

babe pay attention i have boobs to show you

[twiststreet]

Now You 3 Me — from the writer of motherfuckin’ Macbeth! Hell yeah!!

[fishing-lesbian-princess]

“Straight dudes will tell you they’re into older women and then the women in question will be barely 300 year old elves without a single wrinkle on their faces. If they saw the older women I want to fuck they’d hurl!” The rogue says, tears welling in her eyes. The rest of her adventuring party tries to console her. The party wizard who is dating a 300 year old elf doesn’t hold it against her, he knows she’s only lashing out because she fumbled a 4000 year old elven gilf

[transmortifried]

not enough fantasy settings talk about street food like c'mon there was street food in ancient times across basically every culture lemme see what weird snacks you can buy off a guy in an alleyway

[heedra]

when a human infant is in the womb, moments from being be born, a vague figure of glowing amber light appears before them. in one hand, it holds a small soapstone carving of a coiled eel. in the other hand it holds a mortar and pestle made of polished red quartz. it bids the infant to choose between these two things, but we don't know the significance of this choice, because all babies throughout history with no exception have always picked the soapstone eel. so that's still one of the big mysteries out there.

[thebestestbat]

i do think that writers should be aware of the dark topics they're writing about; to me this means that e.g. if you're writing about an abusive relationship, you should know that it is abusive. i don't mean that you need to have a big and important point to make about abuse (especially not a necessarily moralistic one where e.g. the abuser "gets what's coming to them") in order to write it. just like that you should know what you're writing about. otherwise you get batman comics.

[sexhaver]

critical support for this houston mcdonald's location specifically

[sexhaver]

im so indescribably sad that this location shut down last year because we'll never get any more reviews or pictures of the fucking Crazy-Earl-ass door with an eye slit that they served people through

[sexhaver]

i brought this up with my family yesterday and my mom pointed out that the sign next to the door in that one picture is NOT the standard "no weapons allowed on the premises" sign that every business in Texas has, as i had assumed before zooming in:

they not only allow, but "support and encourage" you to conceal carry

[christs-cock-deactivated2023110]

he's built like an unsecured ikea bookshelf and brother, am i a toddler

[christs-cock-deactivated2023110]

is it too much to ask for

[nwmo]

NEW FISH JUST DROPPED

[cannibalcaprine-deactivated2024]

I KNOW that playing God is morally wrong, but holy HELL, it looks fun.

[ninjakittenarmy]

Why is it playing God? We aren’t violating any natural laws. God set the parameters of the universe to allow these things. There’s nothing wrong with it, there’s no hubris in learning more about how to manipulate the universe around us.

[cannibalcaprine-deactivated2024]

We made a whole-ass fish.

[ospreyonthemoon]

The reason this was accidental BTW is because they used paddlefish eggs as a negative control group for a breeding experiment on sturgeons because the scientists, quite naturally, assumed that they were SO unrelated it would be genetically impossible for them to mate. Like. I cannot stress enough to you how these creatures last related ancestors were

140 MILLION YEARS BACK.

If you don't know how far that is, that's basically the start of the cretaceous. Let me simplify that for you even further. Chimpanzees and humans seperated, what, 5 or 6 million years ago?

This is basically like if humans could hybridise with THESE THINGS.

This is the sort of thing that should be impossible. They used those eggs to be ABSOLUTELY 100% SURE NOTHING WOULD HAPPEN.

And then THEY GOT FISH OUT OF IT.

Like. You can quite clearly understand why they didn't think anything would happen. WE ARE MORE RELATED TO BLUE WHALES THAN THESE THINGS.

THE AMERICAN PADDLEFISH AND THE STURGEON ARE SO COMPLETELY UNRELATED THAT THIS IS NOT PLAYING GOD. IF ANYTHING THIS IS AN ACT OF GOD.

THE SCIENTISTS HAD NO BLAME IN THIS BECAUSE NOTHING LIKE THIS HAD EVER HAPPENED BEFORE

It sort of goes against the rules of genetics a bit.

[ospreyonthemoon]

Oh i forgot to add

THESE THINGS, FOR HYBRIDS, HAD A REALLY HIGH SURVIVAL RATING. LIKE 70% OF THEM SURVIVED.

To put that into perspective, getting a blue whale and a squirrel and trying to hybridise them is more sensible, and that wouldn't produce anything but getting you banned from science. Most animals that aren't plants can barely hybridise two degrees away from each other.

BUT THESE TWO ENTIRELY UNRELATED FISH create PERFECTLY HEALTHY HYBRIDS.

the scientists literally had to do the tests AGAIN just to be like "okay this is real right. This is actually like, not a fluke, this works right" and it worked again. They just Can!

[qapleulia]

saving my favourite twitter thread here just in case

[hootenanie]

post my angel of discourse. post for me!!!

[bill-blake-fans-anonymous]

(In a piercing soprano) Horror movies are unethical because the characters are forced to be scared!

[lavendersalve]

(In a warm, resounding contralto) we should ban sex scenes because the characters were children at some point in their lives!

[naamahdarling]

(In a velvety tenor) All children's entertainment is inherently unethical because it's created by adults for the express purposes of manipulating the minds and emotions of young people before they can think for themseeeeeeeelves!

[joasakura]

Y’all not just knocking on the devil’s door, u out here caroling on his lawn

[unsubconscious]

Alisa Shea, ‘A Feminine Touch’, 2021 Watercolour on paper, 35 x 50cm

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

What the fuck do you mean watercolour on paper

[finwe-the-disappointed-deactiva]

...I found the “girl falls into middle earth” fic I wrote when I was 11