I’m The Smart One

Holder of the Revenge’s braincell, lover of crocs, and certified cutie pie :).

[ask-oluwande]

Hey guys, heard Frenchie was giving people advice on the internet so figured I should get on here and make sure nothing blows up

[ask-uncle-fang]

Any progress on Project Terrier?

(And between you and Roach? ;-) )

We're on our way to the same port I got my first puppy at many years ago. Hopefully we get lucky 🤞

And well.... Roach and I.... We've been very into "self care" these past couple of days. Plenty of massages. A lot of them.

[ask-oluwande]

The polycule is rooting for FangRoach!!

[ask-roach-questions]

@ask-calico-jack you got any leads on a good grave robber? I need to submit my CPE (continuing pirate education) anatomy credits this year.

[ask-oluwande]

Archie used to rob graves I’m sure she’d help you out!

[ask-stede-bonnet]

you ever think about bees

[ask-oluwande]

You good Cap?

[ask-stede-bonnet]

um yeah? bees are wonderful

[ask-stede-bonnet]

do you not like bees/?

[ask-oluwande]

Jim’s allergic but does not understand this about themself so I’ve had to yank out more stingers with my bare hands than you could ever know

I don’t mind bees tho, they’re kinda cute when they’re far away

[ask-stede-bonnet]

you ever think about bees

[ask-oluwande]

You good Cap?

[ask-oluwande]

Do you have charms for your crocs?

Yeah!! Jim likes to whittle me little charms, mostly in the shapes of various weapons. One time they spent a week whittling a baby turtle charm and I treasure it!

[ask-stede-bonnet]

☠️⚔️💎💰👑🏴‍☠️

[ask-calico-jack]

[ask-stede-bonnet]

🍊🍎🥦🌽🍞🥖🧀🥞🧇🥓🍗

[ask-calico-jack]

💀☠️🦴👻☠️⚰️🪦🟩

[ask-stede-bonnet]

🌱🌿💐🌷🌹🌺🌸🌼🌻💫✨🌈

[ask-calico-jack]

💲💱💹💸💸💵💰🪙🏴‍☠️⛵

[ask-stede-bonnet]

🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️

[ask-oluwande]

[ask-calico-jack]

So if the cat doesn't get hired it gets put back right?? Or at least dropped off at the nearest port??

Sure

[ask-stede-bonnet]

Jack you don't... you didn't... please tell me the cats you didn't hire left your ship in one piece...

[ask-oluwande]

Captain…the piss man killed those kitties…

[ask-stede-bonnet]

Jack, tell me Olu's wrong... Please tell me Oluwande is wrong, Jack...

[ask-calico-jack]

Tequila was the first interview that I personally conducted for that particular position.

That being said I don't conduct all my job interviews personally, and that weren't the only round of hiring I've ever done.

[ask-stede-bonnet]

ARE YOU IMPLYING YOU LET FUCKING INNOCENT CATS DIE?? The captain is fucking responsible, you heartless fucking monster!! What the fuck, man??

[ask-oluwande]

@ask-uncle-fang

Get him Fang-y

[ask-calico-jack]

So if the cat doesn't get hired it gets put back right?? Or at least dropped off at the nearest port??

Sure

[ask-stede-bonnet]

Jack you don't... you didn't... please tell me the cats you didn't hire left your ship in one piece...

[ask-oluwande]

Captain…the piss man killed those kitties…

[ask-oluwande]

Did I ever tell you guys about that time Pancake managed to steer the ship?

[ask-stede-bonnet]

The snake??

[ask-oluwande]

Yep. We were at breakfast and realized we didn’t know who was steering, so Roach went to check and it was Pancake!

He was steering us in the wrong direction and we almost hit a rock, the little scamp!

[ask-stede-bonnet]

How'd he do that without any arms?

[ask-oluwande]

Wrapped himself around the wheel

[ask-oluwande]

Did I ever tell you guys about that time Pancake managed to steer the ship?

[ask-stede-bonnet]

The snake??

[ask-oluwande]

Yep. We were at breakfast and realized we didn’t know who was steering, so Roach went to check and it was Pancake!

He was steering us in the wrong direction and we almost hit a rock, the little scamp!

[ask-oluwande]

Did I ever tell you guys about that time Pancake managed to steer the ship?

[ask-oluwande]

@ask-stede-bonnet Hey we’re packing for the trip but Archie’s insisting on smuggling Pancake in her suitcase. Just a warning in case it would bother Wolf!!

[ask-stede-bonnet]

I'm terribly sorry, who is Pancake?

[ask-oluwande]

Archie’s pet snake that bit Pete on the ass that time

[ask-stede-bonnet]

Is Pancake big enough to hurt Wolf? If they're smaller than a kitten and kept in a cage the whole time it might be fine, but if Pancake is big enough to hurt Wolf I don't want them in the house. And you should probably check with Ed about all this, I don't think he wants a snake in the house under any circumstances...

[ask-oluwande]

He looks like this lol, don’t know where Archie found him

He’ll be in a cage if the cage is Archie’s suitcase

[ask-stede-bonnet]

That is a very large snake! He looks like he could hurt Wolf.

@ask-edward-teach Ed, darling... care to weigh in?

[ask-edward-teach]

FUCK NO

[ask-stede-bonnet]

Well, there you have it. Ed says no. Please leave Pancake on the New Revenge! He's not welcome in our establishment.

[ask-oluwande]

I’ll do my level best but you still might want to search Archie’s bags when we get there, she’s pretty attached to that thing

[ask-oluwande]

@ask-stede-bonnet Hey we’re packing for the trip but Archie’s insisting on smuggling Pancake in her suitcase. Just a warning in case it would bother Wolf!!

[ask-stede-bonnet]

I'm terribly sorry, who is Pancake?

[ask-oluwande]

Archie’s pet snake that bit Pete on the ass that time

[ask-stede-bonnet]

Is Pancake big enough to hurt Wolf? If they're smaller than a kitten and kept in a cage the whole time it might be fine, but if Pancake is big enough to hurt Wolf I don't want them in the house. And you should probably check with Ed about all this, I don't think he wants a snake in the house under any circumstances...

[ask-oluwande]

He looks like this lol, don’t know where Archie found him

He’ll be in a cage if the cage is Archie’s suitcase

[ask-oluwande]

@ask-stede-bonnet Hey we’re packing for the trip but Archie’s insisting on smuggling Pancake in her suitcase. Just a warning in case it would bother Wolf!!

[ask-stede-bonnet]

I'm terribly sorry, who is Pancake?

[ask-oluwande]

Archie’s pet snake that bit Pete on the ass that time

[ask-oluwande]

@ask-stede-bonnet Hey we’re packing for the trip but Archie’s insisting on smuggling Pancake in her suitcase. Just a warning in case it would bother Wolf!!

[ask-oluwande]

boy why r you so sillyy

Its that tender swag