No Tresspassing On Roof @astrixemily - Tumblr Blog

billpottsismygf

Ah yes, the famous proverb. See no evil, hear no evil, smell no evil.

lake-erie

this year’s prom theme is… *opens envelope* Great Lakes Invasive Species And What Boaters Can Do To Stop Them

football-in-tuxedos

And the subject of tonight’s ecology panel is *turns on powerpoint* Enchantment Under the Sea

userfish

vexwerewolf

Organised crime? Nah girl I'm into disorganised crime. If a goon doesn't have ADHD they aren't getting hired

vexwerewolf

Cops can't stop us if they don't know what we're doing, and they can't find out if we have no idea either

vexwerewolf

Nah I'm safe it wouldn't happen twice

vexwerewolf

Minions stop this post from reaching 1k

lesser-robot-cat

On it, boss! Gettin' this post to 10k, just like you said!

airwar

we used to turn the tv on and just watch whatever was on there

correctopinionhaver

mintypineapple

Yes, it was frequently The Simpsons.

shark-tranny

goodjob from a girl with huge congratulations

shark-tranny

badjob from a girl with huge disappointments

yurious-george

dogpuppy

just-spacetrash

in my little pony universe youd go to a job interview and theyd be like so how does your cutiemark reflect your dedication to this position. And every time youd have to spew some bullshit about how your cutiemark of two tennis rackets actually means youre a team player and good at multitasking and view the market like a playing field. or whatever. and you wouldnt even get the job

uruimipaints

Unequivalent exchange

asksloyxp

Maybe if I just work harder, this empty cup will pour again

shinyrock6498

Maybe the cup needs a bit of time to rest and refill?

asksloyxp

Maybe the cup needs to lock the fuck in???

glitchgirl0812

I would project my period cramps onto flowery but he would probably say some shit like “I would gladly take this burden for a princess in need” or something and that takes the fun out of it

sillysquid11

got it, acting as antenna to project the cramps of my transmasc friends to him for extra pain

whereintheworldisauniqueusername

Even that wouldn't even work because if he learned that he was having a transmasc's period cramps projected onto him, he'd say some shit like "I'd never leave a fellow prince in such horrible pain" while the voice clip "My King!" plays, & at that point I'd rather just deal with the cramps myself

this-is-trans-joy

being closeted in a conservative, conformist town and then seeing a visibly queer person out in public is like seeing an angel. like finding cool water in a hot desert. like reuniting with a long lost family member. im gonna cry

this-is-trans-joy

this person was so cool and so queer and so punk and so 2000s gay in the greatest coming of age movie youve ever watched in your life i nearly fell to my knees right in front of them. i havent formed a cohesive thought since. god bless you visibly queer people you are so brave and so wonderful and you mean everything to me

riverlinden

"kung pow penis," a phrase commonly used in reblogs to indicate utter disdain for OP, has twelve letters, each of which (traditionally) must be supplied by a different user. the unanimity of disdain indicated by these twelve unrelated users has strong parallels to the requirement of unanimity for a jury—also traditionally of twelve—to arrive at a verdict. in this essay i will

quendergeer

"I'm not posting S and you can't make me!"

lola-legendary

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hardyparti-deactivated20250411

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osvaldvvanstein

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tiredmisophonicwerewolf

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ultimatenutshackfangirl

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ohhmichelettoohh

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beetle-goth

throwupgirl-deactivated20240906

thesituation

my 100% failproof way to handle reactionaries asking why i don’t shave at all is going “because i don’t want to” it works because what they really want is an argument about the merits of feminism, and they’ll draw it out and try to convince you it’s a cult or whatever, but you can avoid it all by sticking to “i just don’t wanna. don’t feel like it” and if they argue with you about it you can use your ultimate ability, which is “i’m sorry i thought it was a free country?” which, believe me, they cannot come back from. they’ll either drop it or start harping on something you didn’t say, and it’s important you don’t take the bait at that point. when they can’t argue with what you say, they assume your beliefs and attack those. and you crucially must be visibly baffled at their change of direction because it will make them seem and possibly feel crazy (which they are). “i don’t want to shave” is a perfect response because truly it all comes down to autonomy and the ability to do what you want. they’ll try to say “feminism makes you think you have to do that” and it’s important to not take that bait. to reiterate that you don’t know what they mean and you just don’t like shaving and that it’s really weird to look into it that deep. this works i promise