Kers

//

[makomoriz]

i hope the anonymous person who sent the "i used to live in your house. i'm drunk in boston and it's the only address i know. happy holidays" postcard is aware that they wrote my favourite poem

[owlservice]

I wish I was taller. I wish I was a baller. I wish my cat had a phone I would call her.

[damazcuz]

Certain words can change your brain forever and ever so you do have to be very careful about it.

[visenyaism]

one fun thing about being a teacher in march 2023 is that chess is a literal epidemic among teens. we are starting to have meetings about how we can STOP teenagers from playing too much chess which is like if we were trying to figure out how to stop them from reading for fun. When i was in high school five years ago chess was nerd shit only but now it is transcending every social and language barrier and is absolutely rampant. kids aren’t on their phone texting in class anymore it’s ONLY chess.com. kids are playing chess on their phones while playing chess in real life. this is still better than tiktok because at least the kids are developing an attention span from this

[visenyaism]

the worst part of this is that they’re on chess dot com instead of getting an education. but the BEST part of this is watching high schoolers develop the weirdest goddamn strategies I’ve ever seen. One of my students invented something he calls the “evil advisor gambit” where he gets a third person to give out constant terrible advice to both teams hoping that his opponent falls for it straight-up or that his opponent thinks HE fell for it and will act accordingly thus worsening their own strategy. he has won every game he has been able to pull off a coordinated evil advisor gambit in. this is chess innovation never before seen in its 700 years on earth

[sistertaxon]

mr krabs’s license to kill expires tomorrow

[catchymemes]

[thedepressionoftrees]

Inspiration struck me like a brick to the skull

[effemimaniac]

hey. don't cry. I went to Mad At You island and none of your friends were there :)

[igor-shestyorkin]

THE NHL????

[toosmallortootall]

For context these were the preceeding tweets, and there are multiple news stories (mostly from Republicans throwing a tantrum over the NHL supporting trans people, which is why I'm not linking to the articles) about the trans draft. So it isn't just an empty statement or an intern going rogue amidst twitters death rattle. This is like, a big deal

[peach-pot]

*guy forgetting the word for compromise* uhh what if our choice was bisexual

[funnytwittertweets]

[dingdongyouarewrong]

americans are always saying shit like garbage disposal and i-95

[toanshirotaka]

Those are good names for a pair of orange cats

[quitetheketch-moved]

[memewhore]

[memewhore]

[ampervadasz]

[memewhore]

[nedsseveredhead2]

warrior cats is so funny cause half the villains are described as dark tabbies and the books make them sound so intimidating but they really just look like this

[nedsseveredhead2]