a tidbit

I am a mother to three wild children and a semi-friendly dog. I have degrees in Nursing and Human Kinetics. I follow recipes with no deviation. I like to sleep in my tiny camper. I love to run. I have a whole lot to say with no time to say it, so for now I will just share a tidbit.  

[atidbit-blog]

Pick Your Battles

Having a newborn is exhausting. Often sleep is hard to come by. Hands are no longer free to act as they wish. Baby vomit adorns the floors and walls. Diapers pile up in inexplicable places where a change seemed to require immediate attention. These teeny tiny helpless creatures are a lot of work. But the work is not the part that sends me into a negative and unhappy state. It is the lack of control. This is my third newborn, I have yet again, momentarily,  lost control over my time and my actions. My own desires have disappeared into the abyss of motherhood.

Having control is strongly linked to ones state of happiness. Oxford University psychologist Michael Argyle says that "For happy people, time is filled and planned. They are punctual and efficient.” With three young children under the age of five I have lost control over many facets of my daily life. In the early days nothing is planned and I am the furthest thing from punctual and efficient.

Last week I was graced with the ability to run around the lake while my inlaws watched all three kids. This was not an easy task. It required a good hour of packing the kids’s snacks, diapers, toys, changes of clothes, wrestling them into socks, shoes, jackets and into the car. I then loaded the stroller, the rain cover, the second seat, the beach blanket, the whiney dog that woke the baby….and so on. My heart was racing so fast that I was quite possibly on the verge of a panic attack until we were driving. As I dangerously attempted to stay within the lines that suddenly felt oh-so-narrow,  I simultaneously was trying to calm my thoughts of what I needed, may have forgotten, or should be doing next all whilst navigating to a destination I am not entirely familiar with….my four year old continued to brain slam me with an endless stream of questions slash demands. I questioned whether this short run would be worth this massive hassle.

Once I finally began to run I realized I didn't have an ounce of energy and rather than accelerate my out of control thoughts I not only craved but needed to slow them down. So I slowed my frantic sprint to a lengthening speed walk and let my thoughts settle into a sensible fashion. Why was I so overwhelmed? Yes I have young children but really should it be this hard? Should I always be so angry and frazzled? Why can’t I catch up? A few kilometres of continual analyzing and it hit me, I need to let go.  I am trying to control way too many things and the wrong things at that.  And I am constantly unhappy with my inability to attain the upperhand. Back in the day (really I am not that old), but back in my pre-kid life I was a determined athlete who set goals and combined hard work and sacrifices to attain those goals. These days I live my life with no goal, no idea where the day will take us and the constant flurry of hours going by. It hit me, I need to slow down and take inventory of what I need to control and what I should just let be. Instead of just yelling and screaming at any poor sucker who crosses my path when everything is going awry. This chaos can and will settle with a little work.

These are the oversimplified categories of my life that I must control:

Safety No questions asked, if any behaviour or situation is hindering the safety of anyone: children, adults, dogs, or any other living being then I will interfere and take control. I am trying earnestly to ignore the constant bickering of my 2 and 4 year old and allow them to have some space to find solutions. But if this bickering is at the top of the stairs, or at the top of the slide, or includes knives or scissors (never doubt my kids) or fingernails scraping eyeballs, then and only then will I interfere. The rest of the time I have been working on deep breathing and distraction techniques. AKA grinding my teeth to the point of excruciating pain.

Money I can control how much money leaves our account. This is a relatively new phenomenon to me. I was under the impression all of our expenditures were essential. We aren't buying fancy clothes, or new toys (to my kids chagrin), or even eating out very often so I falsely presumed it must be essential spending, right? But once I sat down and took my inaugural in depth assessment of our accounts I realized we were basically throwing money away. Our spending needed to be controlled. So now I can focus my control freak tendencies at analyzing what I spend money on. I added two apps to my iPhone that I am sampling to determine which is more geared to my manner of doing things. Zeny and Mint. The challenge of keeping our spending under certain limits within set categories feels oddly satisfying. One of the most successful habits of those who lose weight is maintaining a food journal. Similarly maintaining financial health requires maintaining a journal. As a result what I mindfully spend money on is much much more satisfying.  

Food I am a strong believer that the chemicals in processed foods have detrimental effects on our health. I also believe that they have negative effects on children’s behaviour. I cannot prevent my children from ever eating a bag of chips but I can do my best to provide them with healthy options first and foremost. For the first three months after Neko was born I found my days to be completely out of control. The kids were wild and erratic and I was always two steps behind. I was fully aware that they were usually low blood sugar and in dire need of a healthy meal but the darn baby always seemed to need to be fed or changed or would be puking all over me…again. The big kids had to wait and the hungry chaos continued. Just recently I invested in some fancy lunch boxes that hit my budget pretty hard but the sanity was worthwhile. Not only are they snazzy looking but by spending a fortune on them I have committed to making good use of them. I am too thrifty to let them gather dust in a drawer. I bought two lunch containers and two snack containers. I prepare their snacks and lunches the night before and leave them handy in the fridge. They still munch on the odd cookie here and there but their snacks and lunches are reliably healthy and because they are prepared ahead of time.

Exercise My husband and I constantly bicker about who gets to exercise. I know this is a good thing but these days where time is tight it feels quite frustrating to have to validate why one of us is more deserving of the sweaty adrenalin rush. But I have come to the realization that I focus too much energy on getting my exercise fix. I really need to force myself to expend some of this energy on less desirable tasks. Other moms may exert their control by maintaining a clean house, stylish clothes or a spick and span car. I exercise. Not a day goes by that I don’t walk, run, bike or strength train. But weeks can go by that I have failed to clean, grocery shop or pay bills. But the change starts here and exercise is now now not a necessity but a reward when I have finished my chores, or a commuting feature that I work into my day to balance the needs of all the others (I will discuss this in another post, see cargo biking with kids).  

Schedule When my first born son was one year of age I complained to a seasoned mother that he was a terrible sleeper. She inquired about his bedtime routine, to which I raised an eyebrow. There was no bedtime routine, nor did he have a set bedtime at all. Some nights he fell asleep in a carseat at a restaurant, some nights he would be in a stroller at the beach and very rarely we would attempt to battle him to sleep in his crib. I am sure that this lack of a schedule is not the only reason for him being the world’s worst sleeper, but I can guarantee it did not help. With three young kids to preserve sanity there needs to be a schedule. There are set times at which they eat and sleep. Mornings are out and about and afternoons are at the homestead resting and recharging. This is our schedule. The best part of having a schedule is that it enables me to leave my children. Try to leave a babysitter with three kids who have no schedule. Chaos would ensue. I don’t fret if we are behind slightly, actually I am late for absolutely everything. But a loose schedule of predictable events does exist and settles the nerves of all four of us.

There you have it. The areas in my life that I need to have control over. By identifying them I have also become aware of which areas I have made a commitment to relax my control over. -What my kids wear. This is a pointless battle and I should and will be happy that they have dressed themselves even if they are dressed all in pick and backwards. -How clean my house is. We clean as we go and they mess as we clean. It is a constant cycle and in a few years we will be amazed at how clean it stays. But for now, my happiness is derived from the smiles on their face not the shine of my floors. -My children’s personalities. This sounds ridiculous but the reality is they are these tiny needy beings for so long and gradually morph into these children with their very own thoughts, opinions and personalities. They may not want to make friends, or go to the playground or ride their bikes and we as parents need to realize their is no normal and be able to accept their personal choices. -Their emotions. This has been a revolutionary realization to me. My children can be angry, happy, or sad and it is okay. They can scream and cry and it is okay. I cannot control how they feel. They are allowed to feel this way. They are allowed to express these feelings (as long as they are not hurting anyone). I have a lifetime to learn and have chosen to follow the words and ways of Janet Lansbury and RIE parenting in my journey. -The actions or words of others. I cannot control them but I can control if I take offence to them. By practicing the art of taking no offence I remove myself from many situations and am able to see where the person is coming from (usually not a good place). In doing so, when someone intends to offend me they are unable to. When the car drives to close to me and my kids while we bike, when a grumpy old lady pushes right through us in the grocery store, when the neighbour yells obscenities that I parked in “his” spot, I cannot stop their words or actions but I can choose to be offended or not.

I find a sense of peace in writing down the elements of my life that I can and cannot control (in relation to my days with the children). There are clear boundaries for the most part and I have decided before the chaos ensues, which battles I am going to enter and which I am going to let pass.

I challenge you to take a good hard look at your life and identify the areas you must be in control of. Also take note of the areas that are out of your control and wave goodbye as you toss them high into the sky. I cannot promise you instant happiness but I do believe it will provide you with a small sense of achievement, and these days any success is worth the effort.

[atidbit-blog]

Monday Burn

So your bronzed shoulders are a bit crinkly today and your bloated belly remains from a sunny weekend lazing by the lake. Ok thats not what I did (we biked 30km towing kids and jumped in a lake) but I am completely aware that “we” are not the norm. Its Monday, so like many SAHMs that means the laundry is overflowing, you are out of groceries and the kids are overtired and angrily confused about the hectic weekend of daddy-directed planning that just passed. Take an hour to yourself. Steal an hour for yourself. Hide for an hour by yourself. I don’t know how the hell you can do it but try desperately to find an hour and then find the energy to blaze through this fun little workout. Just turn your brain off, tie your laces and work really F$%*ing hard for one minute at a time (total time- 45 min). Your metabolism will be pumping for as long as your tan lasts. 

(If you are tight on time, do one set of each circuit.) 

EQUIPMENT- mat, bench, and weights (light and heavy) 

Warm Up- 5 minutes

 jump rope, run, or step up 

Circuit 1 (1 min each with 15 seconds between each exercise) 

Effort- ALL OUT- 9/10

Sumo Squat and Bicep Curl 

Push up- tap shoulder every 3 push ups 

Walking lunges with shoulder press 

One legged bent over rows 

Sit ups with weighted punches (3 punches) 

-30 seconds rest. 30 seconds skip. Repeat Circuit 1. 

Circuit 2 

Pilates Boxer with light weights 

side plank and rear dumb bell fly 

squat with alternating press up with light weights 

step ups with weights  

V sit on bench 

-30 seconds rest. 30 seconds run. Repeat Circuit 2. 

Circuit 3 

Curtsey lunge with tricep press back 

scarecrow on one leg 

Bent over reverse fly 

Double dip lunges with weights 

Inch worm 

-30 seconds rest. 30 seconds run. Repeat Circuit 3. 

Cool down

3 minute run (minimum)

Stretch

[atidbit-blog]

Wanna Waffle?

At this stage of my life, as a mother to three young kids (7 mts, 2.5y and 5y) a rambunctious dog and a busy self employed (aka perpetually distracted) husband, I am very picky about who I welcome into my life. The same goes for my appliances. You must be able to prove to me that you will be utilized on more than two occasions each and every day (I am talking about appliances now...sort of). For example, we make coffee in the morning and in the afternoon. We often make a crockpot full of steel cut oats for breakfast, wipe it clean and make a stew for dinner. The panini grill is used not just for the obvious but also for perfect fried eggs, pancakes, quesadillas, and even meat. We don’t have a toaster because the oven works just fine. You get the point. I aspire to be a minimalist but I chronically accumulate goods that intend to aid in this minimalization, this in turn creates a chaotic cycle that enables me to keep my curbside FREE box loaded and master the local buy and sell networks. Alas, two weeks ago we welcomed a brand new waffle maker into our lives. We went for a midrange Hamilton Beach 4 slice Belgian Waffle Maker. The biggest selling feature is that you can pour the batter in and walk away for 6-8 minutes and become fully immersed in changing diapers, breaking up fights or chugging lukewarm coffee (the morning joys). Unlike eggs on the stove or a boiling pot of oats, they are fast and self sufficient. I am also happy to say that after two weeks of doubled up waffle dishes, my kids are still raise their hands to the rood when they see waffles! 

So now I will grace you with a top ten of the waffle recipes we have enjoyed or plan to enjoy......

1) Banana Bread Waffles 

Say What? I don’t have to wait an hour for the banana bread to come out of the oven? Yummy Banana Bread in 6 minutes. Take note this recipe is heavy on the sugar I would recommend cutting it altogether or at least halving it (although my kids didn’t complain).

2) Vegetable Waffles 

And this is how we had waffles for dinner. A fried egg on top and it was divine. Not the most beautiful waffle in sight but every food group on the list with very little mess. I used the food processor for all the veggies and cheese so clean up was minimal. I also went with what I had on hand which meant omitting the kale, adding 3 carrots, a head of broccoli and a handful of dill. I free poured the cheese which in all likelihood was double the norm. The yam added a delicious sweetness to the mix.

3) Oat Waffles 

I love grinding my own oats. Two reasons, one being I feel I have side stepped at least one of the food processing stages (questionable whether this has any impact on the nutritional value of my oats), and number two I make use of another appliance in my house (Vitamix with the dry container). I don't use bowls for this recipe. Everything is done with the blender. I feel like the antithesis of housewife when I can make food without mixing bowls. Little achievements here. When you make waffles twice a day every day you need to switch up the milks, oils and especially the flours. No wheat bombs people! Heres a spelt flour recipe that I will sneak in too. 

4) Vegan Waffles 

We are not vegans but we do run out of eggs ALOT. Im disgusted to say that we average 36-48 eggs a week and are in the market for some chickens. And I should mention I do not eat eggs, so this is a combined effort between my always hungry husband and equally if not more hungry children. This recipe was a result of a very early morning with no eggs, no cereal and no bread in the house. 

5) Cornbread Waffles 

Making chilli in the crockpot and need a fuss free accompaniment? Who doesn’t love cornbread.

6) Falafel Waffles 

Protein packed and ready to throw on a salad or into a pita pocket with a helping of hummus (enter food processor). These are also great to throw in a lunch boxe the next day. 

7) Pizza Waffles 

There are a lot of pizza waffle recipes out there that will trick you and tell you its an easy pizza waffle. But they don't have three impatient kids and aren't as pissed off as I am after frantically googling a recipe and doing my best to multitask the 5pm rush with three hungry kids and a pile of dishes from the day building around me. Yes I really should pre-read recipes but time is not always on my side. When I get to step two and realize I need to now find a baking tray, turn on the broiler and move on to step three of the pizza waffle process, I feel like a victim. If I am making waffles for dinner there is a reason. Its because I don't have time for step two or three. With this recipe dinner is served when the ready light turns green. 

8) Savory Breakfast Waffles 

Waffles with no flour! We are talking about a revolution people! Bacon, cheese and cauliflower, how can it not taste good?  I am not a Paleo follower (is that what they are called?), nor am I celiac (or trendily opposed to wheat), but I do believe we can do our bodies a favour and eat a wide variety of foods in moderation....like waffles twice a day for two weeks. Right? 

9) Hashbrown Waffles 

This recipe is so simple I am pissed I even have to link to someone else for it. But reality sets in and I remember I don’t know a thing about cooking except how to follow a recipe and whether it tastes good. Maybe in a decade or so I will consider myself an expert enough to veer off into the realm of creating my own culinary treats. For now, I am happy to be a lemming (but do note I only follow those with rave reviews from other lemmings). 

10) Power Waffles

I had to link Heidi’s waffle recipe because I heart Heidi. This recipe is nothing revolutionary (aside from a reality check that I don’t and won’t ever have crystallized ginger on hand or that fancy flour). If nothing else, take this opportunity to check out her muffins because man does she have some tasty healthy muffin recipes which I am certain can easily be done in the waffle maker.... report back on that one. 

There you have it, your beginners recipe guide to justifying the teeny splurge on a waffle maker. I am so in love with the waffle maker that it has made the even tighter roster for the camping trailer kitchen goods. No one will judge you if you make grilled cheese sandwiches, paninis, or PB and banana sandwiches your waffle maker as well... Throw away your plates and cutlery people, the waffle maker is here! 

[atidbit-blog]

Happiest Years of My Life?

I am sorry. I don’t feel quite like myself these days. I am tired. But even when I am not tired I am rushed and overwhelmed. There are too many thoughts running through my head and too many voices in the room. Too many hands on my legs and fights erupting by my feet. Within the chaos my mind still wanders to places far away where I have a job, a place to be where my name is not mom. I yearn for that dream to become a reality. But my mind is too cluttered to be capable of making an exit strategy. At the same time I cannot and will not leave these wretched dependents of mine. As much as they make my jaw hurt from the grind of patience they are still mine for now. 

I am sorry that I cannot be happy when you walk in the door. I have been watching the clock impatiently awaiting you but unhappy to see you all at once. A mixture of emotions that I cannot understand myself. Overwhelmed. I never know what I feel entirely until the wee hours of the night when I am too tired to tell you and you are too grumpy to hear. I am sorry that sometimes I truly cannot handle the load we have created. Physically incapable of taming the wee ones and corralling them in the appropriate direction on my own. I am sorry that I need you so often. I am angry that I need you and sorry to ask you and then angry that you are angry I need you so often. This is not who I want to be. 

I want to be capable. I want to be strong. I want to be in charge. I want to be nice. I want to be smiling. I want to be happy. I want to be likeable. Again. 

Today its just so damn exhausting to be needed so much. So much guilt, exhaustion, anger and confusion. I am so wrong and uninformed and ill prepared for all of the stages that we have arrived at. Each one of them is growing at a pace that I cannot keep up with. Kindergarten registration has arrived and we have no idea. No premeditated plan, no definitive values, no community to which we belong. I feel so alone in these decisions with nowhere to turn except google and the local shop keeper. There must be better ways to make decisions than these.... but where is the time. Before I can stop to think I must make dinner, clean the toys, change the diapers, stop the fighting, stop the whining, stop the temper tantrums, clean up the mess, find the dog, feed the dog, get the toddler off the baby, stop the fighting, stop the fighting, stop screaming, grind teeth, be patient, check the clock, when will he be home....

I am sorry I cannot be happier. These are not the happiest days of my life. I try each day to make them into just that but seem to fail miserably each and every time. Perhaps it is the monotony of routine or the inability to keep pace with them. I am moving slower these days, I am outnumbered and I am running out of zest for this intensity. If a day is good it is exhausting. I have been one step ahead for the entire duration and I am now done. I have no energy left to keep pace with you. I want silence. White. Blank. Peace. 

When ladies say to me, “oh I remember those years, I don’t miss them one bit”, I feel a sense of relief. I am not the only one... and it will be over one day. This dark, endless tunnel may have an exit after all. There will be a day where I will get dressed and leave the house on my own without bags and diapers and toys and fights and changes of clothes. I will walk out the house and not have to tell anyone where I am going or when I will be back. There might even be a day that I feel sad to not matter as much as I do right now. But today I just wonder who I am, what do I like and what do I really think. I am numb when I want to be alive. I am quiet when I want to be heard. And I am screaming when I want to be patient. I am achieving nothing and progressing nowhere all the whilst time is passing us by. I cannot keep up. 

[atidbit-blog]

Patient Peanut Butter Cookies

I have spent the better half of the last four years struggling to become a more patient person. I am challenged on a daily basis, around the clock, by my chatty and hyperactive son. I love silence, frankly I loathe the sound of music and chatter while I attempt to read recipes and transfer the words into food. Cooking is so foreign to me and I struggle through each and every meal. This struggle is intensified by my son, who literally bounds from chair to couch to chair to counter and back to couch again. He will not, and cannot sit still. He is the epitome of a fidgeter as described in my post a few days ago about ADD children. He must fidget as I must breathe. So when he asks to bake cookies I feel a motherly responsibility to oblige but a private desire to escape into the creepy darkness of my crawl space. 

I put the two girls down for a nap and tiptoed down the stairs only to be sidelined with questions,  “What we were going to do now? Where are my markers? What was that noise? Can we make cookies now mom? Can we, can we, can we?” He doesn’t pause for answers. Sometimes I have to touch him on both shoulders and demand him to make eye contact before he will stop and wait for an answer. Today the cookies became a necessity to him, we had to make cookies. I hesitated in my refusal and he scurried in.... “maybe, I don’t know, I don’t think we have tahini”.... I said thinking of the most obscure ingredient. I dug through a drawer and to my surprise pulled out a jar of Tahini that I forgot I had purchased. I had been wanting to make these peanut butter tahini cookies for weeks now, maybe it won’t be so bad, maybe he has matured...... What the hell, “lets do it”. 

I am happy to report that the cookie making was a success. It was sunny out, I had gone for a walk that morning by the lake, my girls were asleep and my son was overly hyperactive but at least he was happy. It was as good as it gets these days. I had to tell him to settle down, stop moving and to pay attention, over and over again. He burned himself twice. He spilled the chocolate chips three times. He spilled the flour once. He spilled the maple syrup once. He fell off the stool twice. I even turned music on just to muffle his constant chatter. My mind was absolutely intoxicated with overstimulation but somehow the cookies were made. The secret to my success rests in my sensitive teeth. They are still sore from being clenched so hard. These days my jaw is not feeling so great. But all for the sake of keeping my mouth shut and picking my battles. There are so many things I wanted to correct and discipline, especially when making cookies and constantly wiping up messes. And anyone who knows me is cognizant of the fact that I did not cook pre kids. I do not enjoy cooking. I do not enjoy baking. I follow recipes to a t and produce predictable results. It is math and there is no joy. So combine my lack of enjoyment with a fine motor activity with my four year old and the result is not typically a good one. But today I clenched my teeth, grinned through them, chomped them and ignored him. And he chattered and bounced his way through disaster after disaster oblivious to the constant clean up crew he required. And it appears that we may have had an OK time. 

We followed a recipe from the Green Kitchen iPad app. I substituted whole wheat flour for spelt and honey for maple syrup due to lack of stock. I also made them itsy bitsy tiny so I halved the cooking time. And my son added chocolate, because he only eats cookies with chocolate. Aside from the pan in the sink these require just one bowl and only a handful of ingredients. Simple is how I roll in the kitchen so these passed the test. And taste wise, they are yummy. Sweet and peanut buttery goodness. The texture is a bit too crumbly but hey they have olive oil and tahini in them....to be honest, they turned out one hell of a lot better than I would have predicted. I wouldn't give them as gifts but I would share them with a friend. They were adorable until my son sabotaged them with chocolate chips and aggressive four year old fork marks, I clenched my teeth hard. Patience right? 

[atidbit-blog]

Unruly Little Girl

I have a crazy two year old. Wild, feral, other people with children don’t want to be near her, crazy two year old. There is no predicting when she will attack. Expert hair grabber (note she does not pull, she grabs and does not let go), rugby tackling, eye gouging, and, as of recently, animalistic biter. Sometimes with a smile, sometimes she pretends to not look, sometimes when she is mad, sometimes with eyes locked on her target. Whether instigated or not you can be damn sure she is going to do it whole heartedly. I am trying not to complain these days. But constantly living my life on edge is becoming tedious at the very least. I am exhausted. SPIN. She is determined. She is a willful little being who knows exactly what she wants and has no fear of society’s expectations. She has a confidence that I pray will never vanish from her being. She is brave. Brave enough to jump on the back of a six year old boy and take him to the ground with double handed eye grabs. She takes the hand of her anxious brother twice her age and she leads him into rooms, drags him into groups of strangers and two handed pushes the legs of adults to clear room for them to pass. She rides her bike better than she can walk. She doesn’t hesitate at the top of a steep hill with a drop to a concrete flat. She only cries when I demand she not ride a crazy section or when I won’t let her ride her bike down the road to the park, because after all she is just 2. She wakes up happy and ready to “ready, set, go!” race around the house, full speed, all. the. time. She is my special little wild one, fully portraying the terrible twos but from the tender age of one. She will break me, destroy me and one day I will be happy to say I survived her challenges. I am her mom.  

[atidbit-blog]

300 words

Today was a day animated negatively by two teething children and another child who inevitably became the victim to the savage bites. On days like this its hard to make use of what little time is left for me. After dinner has been cleared, the dishes have been done, the laundry loaded, flipped and put away, the dog walked, the toys tidied, the baby put to sleep...again; after the endless chores have come close enough to complete that we can sit down and put our feet up, this is when I can have my time. These days that moment hasn’t arrived. Last night I fell asleep with the baby at 8pm and woke at midnight confused and with a dead shoulder. Tonight I resisted the urge to retreat to my bed at 11pm and forced myself to write. A writer friend encouraged me to start with just 300 words a day. At first it appeared to be such a minuscule number but here I am two months in with only two posts to show. I have been skipping my homework. I am here to find my voice, to create work ethic and to make a legitimate effort to become a writer. 202 words. 

[whatshappeningtothekids]

Kids with ADHD must squirm to learn, study says

For decades, frustrated parents and teachers have barked at fidgety children with ADHD to “Sit still and concentrate!”

But new research conducted at UCF shows that if you want ADHD kids to learn, you have to let them squirm. The foot-tapping, leg-swinging and chair-scooting movements of children with attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder are actually vital to how they remember information and work out complex cognitive tasks, according to a study published in an early online release of the Journal of Abnormal Child Psychology.

The findings show the longtime prevailing methods for helping children with ADHD may be misguided.

“The typical interventions target reducing hyperactivity. It’s exactly the opposite of what we should be doing for a majority of children with ADHD,” said one of the study’s authors, Mark Rapport, head of the Children’s Learning Clinic at the University of Central Florida. “The message isn’t ‘Let them run around the room,’ but you need to be able to facilitate their movement so they can maintain the level of alertness necessary for cognitive activities.”

Dustin E. Sarver, Mark D. Rapport, Michael J. Kofler, Joseph S. Raiker, Lauren M. Friedman. Hyperactivity in Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD): Impairing Deficit or Compensatory Behavior? Journal of Abnormal Child Psychology, 2015; DOI: 10.1007/s10802-015-0011-1

[atidbit-blog]

Nike Training

I seized the moment today. I was able to get both girls down for a nap simultaneously. I coerced my son to have some much needed downtime in his room. Then I caught sight of my kitchen which was still devastated from the rush of breakfast and lunch. I considered picking up all of the toys scattered throughout the house or the dirty diapers carefully folded into tight little balls on the floor. Or, I wondered to myself, should I squeeze in a quick workout? 

A fitness trainer friend introduced me to the Nike Training app. She used it for ideas for group fitness classes. I also want to teach fitness classes so I have been trying to squeeze workouts in here and there to get some ideas. The added benefit is I get a workout in as well. My husband and I are a tad unique in that we argue a lot about who gets to run or workout. There is rarely time for us both to exercise each day and meet all the needs of work, kids, and general house duties... and we both NEED to exercise in order to operate as pleasant sociable beings. Hence my excitement at being able to possibly squeeze a workout in without having to coordinate with his schedule. Ah, the little joys of mommy house arrest. 

The Nike training app takes the thinking out of working out. And for many of us, the thinking “what should I do, for how long, with what”, is enough of a deterrent to not do the work out at all. Plus, it gives me the motivation and capability to do a workout in my house with little to no equipment. The app links up to my music library and plays random tunes (unfortunately I worked out to Mozart today), it times each exercise and it even talks to me, reminding me about form and what to focus on. You can also select how long you want to workout for and what type of workout you want. It is as good as a virtual, non existent personal trainer can be. There is also an option to play a short clip of each exercise demonstrating proper form and sequence. Today I did a plethora of skipping, squats, burpees, pushups, lunges, ski jumps, mountain climbers and other high rep cardio exercises. 

After my 30 min workout the grey clouds in the sky parted. My son’s non stop screams for attention induced empathy rather than frustration on my part. I patiently cooperated with my daughters frantic need to have me put her dolly in and out of a snowsuit, I cracked jokes and created age appropriate stalling techniques while I breastfed the baby. I even made dinner, cleaned up and sent my husband out for a run. I basically transformed into a much better, much nicer person. It is amazing what a little heart thumping and blood pumping can do for one’s mood. 

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Tile

Its a daily occurence, the search for…. my keys, my wallet, or my phone. These are items I didn’t HAVE to have on me at all times before I had children. I would just leave if I couldn’t find one of the above. But these days, they are essential items when we exit our abode. Those three plus: diapers, wipes, snacks, water, and other miscellanious extrememly important items. Too many important items. Too much for my little mind to keep track of. Oh and in the midst of all the morning madness some coffee would be oh so nice. 

My husband rolls his eyes every. single. time. I get a bit panicky and always think of the worst case scenario first, “I must have left my wallet in the coffee shop yesterday”, or more often, “you had my keys last! what did you do with them!” I am really, really working on that one and trying to not instantly accuse him. Especially since it seems he has only actually had my keys 5% of the time. But alas, to save my marriage and my wilting memory, I made a purchase that has changed it all. Enter Tile. 

Tile is the only item I have ever purchased off kickstarter. I am not even sure how it happened, although I am pretty sure I was tired, pregnant and suckered in by a facebook ad. As you do with Kickstarter, I paid for my Tiles eons before they even began to make them. Nevertheless, a few months ago a package appeared at my door with four very simple flat squares tucked inside. By this stage they felt free, like gifts from the me of the past. 

Another two months passed before I finally got a minute to set the Tiles up. Set up was fully complete in about sixty seconds. I swear. First I downloaded the Tile app on my iphone. Next I connected the Tiles to my phone via Bluetooth. Next I attached one of them to my wallet, keys, and two of my beautiful cargo bikes (post to come). I took a quick photo of each item and set up was complete. Now when we are making our far from smooth exit with three kids fighting each and every item of clothing we adorn them with, I don’t panic when my keys are not hanging neatly from the hook. Instead I pull out my phone, press search on the key finder and walk around like an idiot until I can hear the slightly too quiet ring of the Tile…. and off we go. 

Perks of the Tile are as follows; water resistant, small, tough, affordable ($25 each or less when you buy more) and the obvious: it helps me find my shit. 

Downsides: only lasts a year, I don’t want to know what its made of and how bad it is for me and/or the environment, doesn’t work well if too far away from lost item and there are no other tile users around to ‘help’. 

The biggest downside that I have run into may not be a glich of the Tile at all, instead it may be a personal flaw. But I still have to ask, how is a scattered and forgetful person like myself supposed to find my keys via Tile when I can never, ever find my goddam phone?  

Watch the promotional video here if my description didn’t fulfil your needs. 

Note to readers: I paid for my Tiles myself. Tile will probably never know I wrote this. If they do read it and do want to give me some free Tiles, I can and will write more about the wonderful Tiles. 

[atidbit-blog]

Tile. Time saver. 

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aupair

She has arrived. Backpack on her shoulders, youthful wonder in her eyes. I let her sit up front with my husband and I position myself in the very back of the car. She has no idea what she is in for. The children peer at her with unashamed interest. And then like a can of coke that has been kicked across the room, slowly and carefully cracked open….. they erupt. Kicking, screaming, throwing random objects in every direction. She is no longer smiling, she has the look of someone who suddenly recognizes the lady with a ‘sick daughter in Prince George’ who she just gave some money to for the ‘bus’…..scammed. They looked so sweet on skype.

I really hope she stays. She can provide the balance that I want, need, must have…….