At The End Of You

Roland Patrick Mundschau-Holdridge Born at 6:33 AM on June 30th, 2015 weighing 7 pounds 7 ounces and measuring 20 inches long died on July 15th, 2015 and shattered the hearts of parents James and Kelsey. This blog is to help me heal, if you can relate I want to help you too. Growing Roland's younger brother Hendrix due in May. A little about me (Kelsey) mother of an angel, obsessed with baking and creating, yoga and dance junkie.

[breastfeedingisbeautiful]

I almost feel sorry for Kevin.

[breastfeedingisbeautiful]

WTFKevin is my new phrase for when my kids do something and I thought I raised them better than that.

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[theglasschild]

Take a shower, wash off the day. Drink a glass of water. Make the room dark. Lie down and close your eyes. Notice the silence. Notice your heart. Still beating. Still fighting. You made it, after all. You made it, another day. And you can make it one more. You’re doing just fine.

Charlotte Eriksson

(via

alunit

)

 .

(via baimbie)

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It is Roland's first birthday today. Very very hard day. Henri is in his outfit today, tomorrow we are having ice cream cake with family. Today I am crying.

[jenngietzen]

[joyfulpearl-deactivated20160722]

The truth is that sometimes, there is nothing you could have done to stop them from leaving you; from hurting you; from hating you; from breaking you.

And to hold yourself responsible for something that you could not have stopped is senseless and painful. So stop, take a breath, and refocus your energy towards loving yourself, nourishing yourself, healing yourself, and hugging yourself.

[sunflowerchlo]

Saw this. Saved this. Lived this.

[health]

[wherewritersblockcomestodie]

I miss you, And not in a “it’s one in the morning, I’m so lonely, looking through old pictures” kind of way. I miss you, In a “my friends are all laughing, and so am I, but somehow you still haven’t left my mind” kind of way. I miss you, And not in a “someone asked me how you were today and I realized I didn’t know the answer” kind of way. I miss you, In a “nobody has brought you up in months, but I still tell stories about you” kind of way. I miss you, And not in a “it’s Valentine’s Day and I’m alone” kind of way. I miss you, In a “you did well on a test and I want to be the first person you tell” kind of way. I miss you. I don’t just miss the idea of you. I miss you.

excerpt from an unfinished book #59 // “breaking up is hard to do” (via un-predictible)

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My pudge 💕🌈

[nedsdeclassified-deleted-deacti]

[ultrafacts]

Source 

[hellkatsally]

These dudes are fucking legit.  They don’t just show up one day in court, either, they actually make friends with the kids and let them know they have a support system and that there are people in the world who care about them and will always have their back.  And less important, but also cool, is that the few times a couple of them have come into my cafe, they’ve been super friendly and polite and when I told one of the guys that I noticed his Bikers Against Child Abuse patch and wanted him to know how awesome I thought he was because of it, he got kind of shy and blushed and said, “The kids are the awesome ones, we just let them know they’re allowed to be brave.”

[bebinn]

The source is long, but so, so good. These men and women are available in 36 states, 24 hours a day to stand guard at home, in court, at school, even if the child has a nightmare. Many of them are survivors of childhood abuse as well, and know what it’s like to feel scared and alone.

In court that day, the judge asked the boy, “Are you afraid?” No, the boy said.

Pipes says the judge seemed surprised, and asked, “Why not?”

The boy glanced at Pipes and the other bikers sitting in the front row, two more standing on each side of the courtroom door, and told the judge, “Because my friends are scarier than he is.”

[lesbian-moon-gf]

Actual tears.. hnngh

[bee-whistler]

Show me more of people like this, world. I give up on humans too easily.

[groovypirate]

where do i sign up for this,i want to be in this gang

[ultrafacts]

[haydengisearchive-deactivated20]

This is fucking amazing. It may be out of character for me to say this but rock on

[clatterbane]

Bikers Against Child Abuse was founded in 1995 by a Native American child psychologist whose ride name is Chief, when he came across a young boy who had been subjected to extreme abuse and was too afraid to leave his house. He called the boy to reach out to him, but the only thing that seemed to interest the child was Chief’s bike. Soon, some 20 bikers went to the boy’s neighborhood and were able to draw him out of his house for the first time in weeks.

Chief’s thesis was that a child who has been abused by an adult can benefit psychologically from the presence of even more intimidating adults that they know are on their side. “When we tell a child they don’t have to be afraid, they believe us,” Arizona biker Pipes told azcentral.com. “When we tell them we will be there for them, they believe us.” ( Article)

More about BACA, from their site

[uriesays]

My parents are a part of this organization and they are metal af

They go on runs to protect the child if they feel even the slightest threatened no matter where. If the child needs them to go on vacation with them, they do. Bikers come from across the nation to watch over and take shifts for these kids. And the best part is once you’re adopted into this family as a BACA kid, you’re always one. Even when you’re 40 and the perp gets released from jail, they’ll come meet with you and find your best options for avoiding the person and maintaining the life you’ve built for yourself. Once a BACA child, always a BACA child. In Florida, there’s 100% rate for identifying the perp based on the child’s testimony. Why? Because BACA stands with the child and supports the child so they feel comfortable enough to point out their attacker.

What’s better than a badass biker gang being on your side???

[kikithegirl]

NATIVE AMERICAN CHILD PSYCHOLOGIST WHO IS A BIKER AND NAMED HIMSELF CHIEF HELL YES I’M HERE FOR THAT AND BIKERS BEING BAD ASS TO PROTECT KIDS. HELL YEAH.

[birdungehrl]

it’s back! I will always reblog BACA

[katiezookat]

♡♡

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Nights are honestly the worst.

So scared. Waiting for June 11 and it to be passed how long Roland lived for. I hope it will make me less fearful.

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11 months ago today we met our first son Roland, 4 days ago we met his little brother Hendrix for the first time. This next month will definitely be one of the most difficult periods of time for me, next month Roland would have been a year old and by that time Hendrix will be older than his brother was when he passed away. Is it painful? Yes but I love both of these little boys so so much and it's worth it. (Ps this is actually from yesterday)

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Henri was born yesterday!