white trash river boat tom sawyer

•He/Him Auckie •jewish/latino •+18 •@worstfruit (fantasy and writing blog) •sorry •💉5/18/22

[auckie]

Limmy pissing himself video

[auckie]

My not shaving my five oclock shadow video equivalent

[auckie]

Limmy pissing himself video

[auckie]

I gotta stop whispering to myself man, a tenant called in to be like ‘gas leak!’ And after I hung up I went and did a whispered gollum voice saying ‘stinking pussy hobbitses!’ And I just know. I know the fucking evil man realtor in the office next to me heard. They let me do this at the spider mines all day every day but I can’t do that here they’ll hunt me to extinction

[auckie]

Constantly denying the urge to respond to my manager and tenants with, ‘oh I’m sorry! Should I slit my throat? Yeah, yeah no problem, so when would you like me to get eviscerated by whaling harpoons? Is it okay if the carnage gets in your mouth? No? Just be advised to keep your mouth closed for the next 30 seconds. Okay, sure thing! I’ll just get my head run over by a cable car first and then we should be good to go ☺️’

[auckie]

I wish I could text my cat

[sids]

[thenoiseinme]

Shuji Terayama

japanese avant-garde of the 1970s

[jollygreengiantveggies]

[meta-xylene]

How is everyone tonight?

[meta-xylene]

Check out the Denver Nuggets old logo

[xquisitedeadguy]

[looney-context]

[mewwon]

remember when everyone would talk about being shadowbanned when their posts would flop

[aflo]

They still do you just can't see it bc their posts are flopping

[auckie]

You can’t see it cause they’re shadow banned

[auckie]

please tag that post with animal abuse/animal death holy shit

I don’t even know what to say to you right now that you’d assume that was true

[auckie]

did yr mom ever get a kevin

Yes but she slept walk the night he came home with her and drowned him in the tub. Very very traumatic for her to wake to. The interesting thing is that he didn’t make a sound— no one woke up to barking or thrashing. When we reviewed the security footage it seemed almost as if he had accepted his fate. The moment she picked him up, he just went limp, and while the camera did not pick up what happened in the bathroom, there was no sound or signs of struggle. No water outside of the tub, no blood or bludgeoning marks, no bites on my mom. It makes you wonder.

[auckie]

I’ve applied to more class actions than I can count and today I’ve had like 17 come in for 20-75 bucks. Granted they were from like a year or three ago so don’t expect good, or instant pay outs but. 💅 this is going to my mortgage and nothing fun

[auckie]

Why isn’t it going to the toons who are still locked in Gardenview??

[auckie]

I’ve applied to more class actions than I can count and today I’ve had like 17 come in for 20-75 bucks. Granted they were from like a year or three ago so don’t expect good, or instant pay outs but. 💅 this is going to my mortgage and nothing fun

[auckie]

your pink flying opera amongus is making rounds again.

right in time for an among us TV show to drop too. what do you mean the voice of the rat from Ratatouille is in it

It’s always going around somewhere. Patton OswalT is in everything nowadays, but Elijah wood is more notable voice casting. I don’t see how they can milk a show out of that when the toons are still locked in Gardenview