i enjoy windex

 | Bisexual | Bog Witch Without a Bog | (She/they/he) | Writing + Art | Formerly @/Tickingclockheart | Foxx is my child™ | Layne is my tumblr mom |

[blanketforcas]

[what-you-eggs]

this is maybe the funniest thing I’ve ever seen, my condolences to the supernatural fandom

[e-seal-deactivated20210319]

The names Practice

[e-seal-deactivated20210319]

Mal Practice

[orchidvioletindigo]

Nice to meet you Dr. Practice, could you please tell me what’s wrong with my son :)

[e-seal-deactivated20210319]

He needs surgery on all of his bones

[orchidvioletindigo]

Very well, here is my credit card :)

[e-seal-deactivated20210319]

I accept no payment I do this because I love it

[bbcsherlock]

Put Misha Collins in front of a crowd of furries and he’ll come out as a wolf named Derek by the end of his speech

[oneheadtoanother]

[demilypyro]

Imagine having the money to solve world hunger and just not doing it. What kind of person acts like that. Why would you not want to be "the guy who solved world hunger"

[demilypyro]

If you solved world hunger you could spend the rest of your life having as shitty of a personality as you want. You'd still be the guy who solved world hunger. Nobody would be able to criticize after that. Why would you not

[demilypyro]

We are not speaking in hypotheticals here

[demilypyro]

God this all fucking sucks so much

[professional-chaotic-dumbass]

I hate this man so much it’s unreal

[lionfloss]

source

[babyfoxcollectionthings]

[kestrel-tree]

Well someone displeased the sky gods didn’t they

[augustdementhe]

My first thought was someone pleased the sky gods, because this is a SHOW. 

[madmaudlingoes]

That’s the problem with gods; their pleasure and their wrath often look the same.

[talesfromgringolandia]

That’s the problem with gods; their pleasure and their wrath often look the same.

why is this fire quote from a tumblr post

[mythopoeticlicense]

Because tumblr is the real world equivalent of infinite monkeys using typewriters eventually producing Shakespeare.

[dogkin]

@the-gay-goblin

[spiderrrling]

I am a(n):

⚪ Male

⚪ Female

🔘 Writer

Looking for

⚪ Boyfriend

⚪ Girlfriend

🔘 An incredibly specific word that I can't remember

[what-even-is-thiss]

*wakes up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat*

WAIT IT’S CALLED A THROW PILLOW

[holorifle]

here is a super helpful website for this kinda thing!

the first result isn’t always the one you’re looking for but when you press enter it’ll give you a ton of words related to your query that’ll probably have what you’re wanting, or something better

here’s some examples:

[menlove-archive]

honest to god can't stop thinking about this song about jeff bezos by philip labes (link takes you to his spotify). it's such a good example of politically driven folk music.

[kaizykat]

Lyrics:

Jeff found a genie in a bottle Who said, "I can give you anything you ask" "You can have your wishes three And a million more for free It's unlimited, just set me to the task."

Well, Jeff thought a while, Said, "I want houses, "I want boats, I want fancy modern art, I want tickets to the Met, I want my own private jet, And a rocket into space just for a start."

Well, the genie waved her arms and made it happen His every wish bolted from the blue And folks all over town grew enamored, gathered 'round To admire the man whose wishes had come true

They said, "Let's hear it for the man who has everything! By good fortune he's been set so far apart." "Yeah, let's hear it for Jeff who has everything! 'Cause his wishes are only at the start."

Well, Jeff heard their shouts and he grew worried He said, "Everybody's getting in my way." The genie smiled as before, "You've got a million wishes more. You can even give a bunch of them away."

Well, Jeff got confused and sorta quiet 'Til he finally said, "I have just one wish more." "I am satisfied, so I wish that you would die So you cannot grant wishes anymore."

Well, the genie's eyes got big and sad and shiny 'Til she finally said, "Your wish is my command." And with an effervescent sigh, she disappeared before his eyes And no wishes were ever granted there again

So, let's hear it for the man who has everything! By good fortune he has set so far apart Yeah, let's hear it for Jeff, who's got everything! Every single fucking thing except a heart

[wordsmithic]

[chismosavirus]

the bunnies did the lady and the tramp kiss. help i’m crying

[chismosavirus]

enemies to lovers

[hearteyedraccoon]

[littlestpersimmon]

my mom’s childhood town

[targent]

is it just me or did they yassify the quaker oats guy

[micro-usb-deactivated20230625]

what the fuck

[liorlenn]

[barin-mclegg]

Almost there guys

[avid-windex-consumer]

one more year...

[communistkenobi-archive]

the feeling of learning is legitimately so cool. there’s a little whoa sound effect that plays in your brain whenever you read a sentence that expands reality for you a tiny bit

[theconcealedweapon]

[raimagnolia]

That and how history is literally repeating itself, so apparently if we judge them at all, it wasn't harshly enough

[powerfulwizard]

[optional]

(x) (x) (x) (x) (x) (x) (x) (x) (x) 

[weekdayholidaybot]

Happy Josh Fight Day!!!