Avo

Stuffing in my Stuffing

[avo-gsy]

12/ 11 / 2020

Dear Diary, Today I did my own fortune of my Past, Present, and Future with Arcana Tarot cards. I asked myself am I happy? I asked myself again if I'm doing fine whatever it's wrong or right. I'm sharing my life from whatever happens. I have no intention of what others' thoughts, opinions, nor they caught my attention, but I will keep their words in back of my mind. This is just a reminder before I grow old with many possiblities and impossibilities.

I'm always scared from these outcomes. This isn't my first time.

From my first, I was a buddhisim child with these fortune. I saw the cards that I thought it was poker games. It's not. They are Tarot cards. I never knew what they are till that dream I had with the Devil himself. I remember I was in a dry desert without any beings roam around. Till the Devil locked in my sight. I took self defense with my rainbow aura soul. The Devil wants me to call him Satan. I cannot say any further because I promise him to not talk about our converstation. So, I can only say what he puts me a curse which he considers a gift before I wake up from my dream.

Anyway, I came down to Arcana Tarot Cards because I get the feeling I can regain my energy on my sights.

I again doing my fortune because those idiots came back whatever the hell they're doing. Because they have to "Stay home" which is my place from the mesage of Covid-19.

I have to use my energy to connect with the Arcanas. I cannot turn any cards around. There are upright and reverse. Very important what I'm assign to. So, I was pretty worn out. I'm also surprise from these. The Emperor and Empress??!!!! They were reaching to me.

PAST: Emperor

The Emperor rules over his world with an iron fist, allowing nothing to escape his grasp.

Be careful not to hold too tightly to your empire. Plants only grow when given room to flourish.

Okay. this was my money problem. Glad, I'm done with that. I get the feeling I put my trust to my fellow associates how they can things done at work. For family, I bet I know who they are. I will never given for their pity.

Present: Emperess

The Empress embraces her inner beauty and kind nature, allowing it to flourish in the world around her.

Now is the time to nurture your relationships, carefully cultivating your connection to others.

Well, I'm still not going to hang out with those bitches in my house. I'm still ignoring them till they die. Yes, I'm heartless cold person which from somebody didn't owe me back my $200 after 3 years. I'm not greedy. That's their responsiblity with a promise.

At work, I will continue helpping others to communicate with others. And also keeping in mind if they ever backstab me. They're messing with the wrong chick.

Past: Queen of Pentacles

The Queen of Pentacles is the backbone of the household, steady and reliable in all things.

Keep being the rock, even in turbulent times. The world needs more nurturing spirits within it.

This is my reasoning why I need to stay being stubborn all the time. I will not be taken advantage of. I don't give a damn they are my family. I will symphasize with everyone if I'm ever being invovled in that any situations.

[avo-gsy]

11/27/20

From Yesterday, I was feeling a disappointed because my little fatass brother said unforgivable shit to me. He didn't do anything, but his words did.

Right after my oldest brother that fucking Demanding Lying Ass Poser threatens me and my life to be perfect. Like having a family because we will become extinct. And also being brainwash by them because they hate my mom's side of the family. I didn't want to leave my mom's side of the family nor hate them by my asshole dad's side of the family's false accuse.

At first, me and that FatAss were calm.

I asked for help without dad's help for changing my brakes from my car. Then he prolong shit I already understand. When he said, "I only knew basic stuff."

I asked him wtf is Basic. He didn't fucking explain it.

He prolong nonsense shit to me.

I want a solid "YES or A NO!"

He prolonging other shits.

I'm like wtf is wrong this fool.

He finally said No.

Then I asked him if I can come by at his house,, but it's my grandma's house.

Anyway, he saying prolonging shit AGAIN! He's still talking about I still need "DAD'S HELP" right from the start I said "WITHOUT DAD'S HELP."

I can change my own brakes because he got the tools at his place.

I stopped him from saying other shits that was so stupid.

He gave me a "NO."

I thank him and cuss him because he is a total bitch.

I thought I was more of a bitch.

And he's just a total stupid bitch.

He called me a nusiance.

I asked him "HOWWW???"

I don't remember being a nusiance to everyone.

If I was nusiance, I would probably end my life and never existed to become a mature adult.

He texted from the next day, but it was hidden deleted message.

I want to know why he delete that message.

I knew too damn well that fatass and that dictator bastard(oldest brother) were onto me.

If my good for nothing father was onto this or rarely my uncle were into this situation.

They're messing the wrong chick here.

That fatass was done talking to me.

I wasn't done. Hell No. I was not done with him.

I said that is true about his true fatass self.

He said to me, " You don't regret your last words before I die."

I'm JusT HEEEELLLLLLL NOOOOO!!!!

NUH HUH! HE DID NOT THREATEN ME ABOUT DEATH. HIS DEATH. HE'S TAKING CARE OF GRANDPA AND GRANDMA! He DARE TALKS TO ME ABOUT DEATH!!!!

I don't regret, but they are not my last words.

He told me I will never know.

I turned the tables on him and said, "You'll never KNOW! You'll never know whenever I will be coming before you die. You'll never know what I will say or do. Goodbye, I will block your ass and your phone number."

So I did.

Then the other day, I was with my mom to drive at his place because she wants to give them gifts.

I saw him. I said that is true about him before he dies without any regrets.

And yet Yesterday, I still did say it. He told me I'm acting a not so grown up. I said, " I'm acting a CHILD???"

He corrected me that I am not a grown up. Not a child.

He's hella stupid. It's the same shit.

My grandma from my father's side misses me a lot because we hung a lot. Well, before that incident with that demanding lying ass poser. Then I went home with my mom.

So, That's what happen to me.

I wanted to check out my happiness.

I wonder if I'm in the wrong.

Well~ What you Look at That...

I have the Devil in reverse in my Present.

Yes, I have accomplished my mission from work.

They offered me no more of Extra Time Work.

I am still sad about that.

They change my work time 10 hours into 12 hours.

I'll be busy this month.

So, I did talked with my fatass little brother.

I don't want to know what his issue, but I already knew too much of him and his issues. He did not provide me evidence after he called me out for his own goods. I gave him evidence which I cussed him out that is true. Only I know his true dark past. I cannot say it here.

That Fatass is already in Hell for seeing what's wrong or what's right. He's not dead....Not yet.

Privacy between family.

The only issues I said it here on Social Media was that they disappoint me in their stupid manners and trying to brainwash me from hating my mom's side of the family. My dad hates my independent hard working aunt for being a top dog. I don't like him what he sees because he himself thinks men should take a lead than women. How dare he see that way when I want to deny everything he views??!!! I didn't want to believe it, but it's true. I cannot decieve my own true self that I was his pawn who agrees on everything he says. He cheated on my mom since 2005. HOW DARE HE AND HIS SIDE THINK THAT WAY!!!???!!!! HOW FUCKING DARE THEY!!!!????!!!!

I'll keep that in mind. I be sure to keep that in MIND.

[junkmixart]

Some anatomy practice sketches of Camp counselor Jason hehe~

I also wanted to update you guys WE SOLD ALL 800 COPIES of the Zine??? That’s INSaNE! But DON’T WORRY the PDFs are also going to be on my Patreon at the end of December! It’s a $5 entry and you can cancel any time!

I’ll probably restock the physical zines maybe around 1-3 months later. It’s going to be hectic shipping all the zines and I also just started a job at Disney. So Idk how often I’ll be making new content. But I’ll try when I can! Thank you guys for the support!

TWITTER

[avo-gsy]

All hail to the glorious new supreme for the future of Disney!

Okay, when you 800 copies... And that was sold out.

I calculate it. I understood what you meant.

Dam, you makin a living that cost on your own way.

[thearcanagame]

Portia’s Book XIX - The Sun: Portia finds help in unexpected places.

[avo-gsy]

I just realize Portia's The Sun didn't have it until now.

[avo-gsy]

I've never ever eva been scared for my life.

I fortunetell my friend from afar through internet.

I was expecting all this BS.....

Well, Look for yourself.

https://instagram.com/bukibukibear?igshid=rxm5hggcajxe

Good Gawdy! This is be my first experiment for trying out through internet from all of ya'll.

ASK ME AWAY!!

[avo-gsy]

I asked my friend from the East Coast of U.S. if I can fortell their fortune. In 4 options. I am waiting for their repsonse so, yeah.

This my Happiness Life.

Let's see about this.~

Probably, My workplace. I did shutoff my work mind into my fantasy land, but still sharp on working my job. I gotta stop talking to people message me about work orders and giggles.

Yup...I am inspiriational, but wanting to see what's next. What I gotta say...I'm a work-alcoholic.~

Awww!!! COME ON! Not my inner self! Thanks, High Priestess. I'll keep a keen to all my surroundings.

Oh~ I am letting go alright. I just need my car from the car shop!!! And pay up $1600.... DAM IT!!!!

\ TT D TT /

My money. That's what it is. It's my Car I HAVE TO PAY UP!

.............

.....

WTF!!!! THAT'S all!

Julian, I love you and all.

I'm struggling with my car and that payment.

My car needs the mounting to be fixed with a cost of $1600.

Oh well, I'm becoming much more work-alcoholic!

[avo-gsy]

It all comes down to this.

FortuneTelling Time!

Ummmmm......Yeah, I was satisfied of how my co-worker thought I was late on my work. It was due pretty early. My request was due on 1:00 while I have time at 11:30. I have to go to lunch and gave my requests to them because 1 have to work while 1 go to break or lunch. I don't do breaks. Anyway, they kept asking why I didn't do in order. I'm like whatever comes first, comes first. They got pretty furious through texting on the laptop. I was laughing like a maniac. Then they told me to go to lunch. My stomach was pretty much empty. I'm such a greedy person for food.

I Get It, I gotta work with my teammate. No more taking advantage over them. It seems like it's my fault. I got distracted texting everyone from the other side in my workplace. They all known me since I took Volunteer Extra Work (VET)!

YES!!!! I established my work effort at work and home. At work, I'm willing to train others if they ever have knowledge on computers.... I hate how slow we get, but I'm getting hang of understanding their efforts. At home, I'm helpping build my grandma her medical bed for her back. She gotta need that bed.

== w == ~☆

Seems like my manager wants me to become a PA or a Manager.

I will......

....................

Deny that offer! I ain't gonna be a weak link from those positions. I want to learn more and more around my big big BIG Building.

It good mulla!~ I decided not to. I can clearly see a big picture with those little tricky details.

Jobs can be rigged these days.

[avo-gsy]

Today's FortuneTelling!

That's so true. I can't enforce others of their own will. I just go with the flow like always. I don't wanna get fired from my job. I do have higher positions. I will not become a Manager! That's too much responsibilites to handle those toddlers. Plus, I help the other Managers getting ideas to ease each other and being aware from their little peeps. They always move me around the places. Whateva is nesscessary from their status. I'm always there to help.

.......No.....No. No, No NO!!! Better not be talking about human love life. Ain't gonna be me in a love relationship with a partner.

Asexual as always!

If a new love talks about How I love my newborn niece. Then I can accept loving my family from my mother's side.

Everyone at my work kept telling I'm a work alcoholic and need to rest. Ummmm....Of Course! I have a dream. A goal! By the end of Feburary, I will be making a lot of dough. I felt verbally attacked when they try to help me not to become a work alcoholic. I told them, "I have a goal! A dream! You can't stop me for not making them happen!" They burst out into laughter because they never heard of someone like me saying such thing.

Asra....I am the Surprise!

[avo-gsy]

THIS IS SO SCARY!!!

I doubt I predict my own fortune could be obviously so stupid from others trying to take advantage of my own life. Better Back the FUCK UP!!!

I thought I was bad of myself treating others horrible. Because I am not making them feel negative. I wanted to work alone, but I'm in a team. I have lack of communication with others. I hope others will understand me then I will understand them. Everytime I see my teammates, I can tell they wouldn't understand much more possibilities and consequences if they tried to communicate from other groups. I taught them how things works for all the areas I know of. We were having fun yet to be sharp and hardworking in front of our high superiors. My teammates got it down, but those days were my Volunteer Extra Time Work. Anyway, I made a lot of dough!

Goat got Me!!!! Thank the Lord. It's only a Reversed. I broke off my relationship with my 2 idiot brothers from my father's side. Including my Father.

It was 4 months ago, I was chilling watching anime at my little fat idiot brother's house with my mom. I was suppose to ask father for helpping my car. He went to someone's kid's highschool graduation party. I waited for him until that Demander Poser 2nd Oldest Brother dropped off father at my little fatass brother' s house because father was too drunk. The moment he saw me I knew it was going to be ugly at the end. At first, the Demanding Poser Brother talked to me a nice greeting like "Sup, it's been a while. How you been?" At the middle, He began pressuring me that "if I hate those people who's living in my house I should buy house" and I said "I have no plans because I am comfortable with my life and not bothering them as they don't bother me. I can cope with that situation. It's my life." At last, We end up having a big arguement where he demands my life to be so perfect and be the only one to take care of my mother. He forced me to grow a family because our family name and country are dying. I felt hurt. Me to have a family with stranger I never felt in love and tell lies future kids about my family's past. BULLSHIT! I HAD ENOUGH OF HIS BULLSHITS! My mom came in and asked me if we can go home, but He fucking held me back by my shoulders. I plan to attack him with pepper spray and kick him in the face, but I thought about his girlfriend's family. So, that's why I held myself back. I thought about those so many consequences. I do not want pay my price. I knew him too well. He's always corrupted since he wants more freedom and much more lies inside of him and above to whatever hell he making much more trouble like suicide and stealing food from Winco and telling his friend's mom that our mom died so, he can live with them. I hated him ever since our parents' divorce. Anyway , I had to wait for him to finish. I had to Act like A Brainwashed mind control freak for him.

My father was there with him with our long converstation. Can't believe him, he told me "You stay quiet until he's finish talking." I gave them "I don't give a fuck look". I actually don't give a 2 fucks whateva the hell these assholes were talking about. I am a grown ass adult woman. None of my father's side doesn't understand me. I understood them, but they treat me like shit, a nobody. I'm always a quiet and good-manner in the family from both sides. They didn't see me that way. They finally threw me off from their life.

I first threw them off after my parents' divorce. I was insanely calm psychopath kid. Thank god, I became well mannered human being by my aunt.

After the next day, my mom told me my father called me a useless horrible daughter. I am like wtf??!!! I actually thought back hard from all those years. How am I useless and...horrible???? Then she showed me that Asshole brother of mine posted girls pushed the guy, but fell ass on the floor and get karma video on FaceBook. That was ridiculous. I told her not to show me and never mention about those idiots.

I stopped visiting them after 4 months until my car needs a brake service. The only person I can trust is my little brother. I asked him over text message if he can help me change my brakes without dad and that idiot. He told me he no expert, but only knows basic stuffs. I was wtf does he mean he only knows Basic Stuffs?!?!!

Do you guys know basic stuffs on cars?!?!?!

I DON'T FUCKING KNOW WTH IS "BASIC STUFF" IS!!!

Then he told me only father knows how to fix my car.

I'm just disbelief. I said WITHOUT FATHER!

I told him I can fix my car alone at his place because my place is crowded with cars and people. I need a space.

That fatass just told me to calm down and only dad knows how to fix my car.

Hello??? Did you not read my text??? I know how to change my car part from my car!!! I called him a Bitch. Cause he sounds like one. I treated him respect when I visited him, but now I knew he would be against me.

I want a straight answer. Not a prolong shit in your own shit out of your ass.

I want a Yes and a No. Not a talking bitch explaining the shit that I already knew.

Then he said, "No, you can't. I didn't do anything. You're making hard on everybody."

I'm just wtf you just said to me. You didn't do anything? You fucking said something so stupid out of your mind. Me??? Making hard for everybody??? I asked him How and When??? Then he told me he's done with me. Wow, this bitch turned his tail away from me. I'm glad he threw me out. He did a very horrid in my mom's side of the family. He attacked my little cousin in the bathroom. I didn't know about that till we move another house. I had this future and past psychic sights that my brother attacked her from the past and he gotten kicked out from the house. I thought it was a false vision sight. Until I felt his aura very sinful that makes me remove him with a knife in my hand behind his back. I told I know what you did. He panicked and called mom that I will kill him in the kitchen. I told mom he was in the way of me making a sandwhich which I was eating my sandwhich. My mom believed me than him. That very day, My little cousin kept her mouth shut ever till she called him a Devil. My aunt slapped her so hard because she treated us like her own kids. She cried and couldn't believe what that bastard did to her daughter. My aunt didn't want to call cops on him so, we had to kick him out of the house.

If I were to ask him what he said to me.

He'll end himself.

At the end, he asked me if I died those were your last words?

Bitch, please. If you were dead, those were my last word. I'm his oldest sister. What an idiot he is.

If I would be bumping him some other day.

Calling him out. Oops, still not dead. Live without me, strange boy.

And my father who's a player to all those random ladies he wants to sleep with. He didn't remove his car policy from his old company. I'm still paying for it. He need his ass to remove his shit. He's the primary of that policy. Fuck, why my car in the first place?!!! And I thought I'm worthless.

Ah, the future.~

I can barely see myself having so much wealth and being active in my job where I have my fun. As for my family, good riddance from that bastard threw off from their side. I'm glad I'm at my mom's side of the family. Some are bad as my father, yet worser for me to see a same repeat. And also repeating their kid's life as my life. Oh god, I pray for them for themselves buy another affordable house. I will still keep on coping and having my goal negativity into postivity! YAY!~

[bastart13]

Happy Ace Week!

I’m just a little bit late but realising I was asexual was such a relief in my life. It’s seriously so freeing realising that other people share your experiences and there’s actually a word for it.

Also, me, a dumbass teenager who realised she had no interest in romance or whatever but concluded it meant no one being good enough for her.

Also, no joke, I have distinct memories of a LGBT+ assembly where someone said they were “what Sheldon Cooper totally was, even if they don’t say it in the show” and yet for the life of me I couldn’t remember them saying asexual!! Like?? Come on, past me!! Read the obvious foreshadowing!!

[avo-gsy]

Oh, shhheeeiiitttt....I knew I am asexual but, I didn't know about the ace and other ace type sheep deep shiet. What else is there???

[thearcanagame]

“It feels…wrong.”

[avo-gsy]

So far, Muriel's route and Lucio's route are done.

The only isn't done is Portia.

Thank my heaven sheep bloop.

Glad I played Nadia's and Portia's.

My Gay Heart have been awoken.

Dam, I know I have a gay radar, but not my Gay Heart.

Now I have a Gay heart.

I'm still asexual. SSSHHHHHIIIEEEEPPP.

[avo-gsy]

My Own Fortune Telling my tales.

For A Love of Sheeps Hopping Over My Gates!

My present and future.

......Are so scary......

THEY REVERSED!!!!

Past: 3 of Pentacles

I already accomplished my social life in many problems from others. Others helpped me understand their system. So, Teamwork gave me a purpose to help each other in a positive apporpiate manners.

Present: King Of Cups

REVERSED

In the name of Holy Jellyfish Jello.

Those who will do me harm in my life.

Oh yeah....I had this talk about my money problem with my own Broster. They had this long lecture for my reality checkout. I do not wish to talk about that converstation in my life. Cause I know my way around in my life. I kept my emotions hidden. Then my Aunt barge in my room. She questioned me why I bought much more expensive in my life card. I did had a problem of spending on games. That's why I stopped playing shooting games.

Future: 9 of Wands

REVERSED

I did lie about I spend less so, that's why I kept on working job 60 hours per week. I finally paid it off today. Then again, I had a goal that I want to pay it off next week, but my Broster! They had to take an advantage of me because I know best of myself than they do. They told me I have a big Ego. Bullshit. It's my life and my spending problems. I can take care of myself. I'm a Grown Ass Adult. I have trust issues with everyone including my family. I'll keep that in my mind.

[thearcanagame]

A curse has fallen on Vesuvia… Everyone’s swapped outfits?! Link: https://store.nixhydra.com/product/preorder-outfit-swap

[avo-gsy]

I'm glad I bought them!

I'm gonna lose my marbles if they came to my house real early.

[thearcanagame]

Be on the look out for more info next week…

[avo-gsy]

Gotta think of scariest costume for the Arcana.

[savenkey-deactivated20201231]

EDIT: Goat Lucio full body & Devil full body

[avo-gsy]

Gotta need the full body Thanks! == w ==

[avo-gsy]

My broster is so dead to me. Made me watch their egg hatch.

[thearcanagame]

If there is more than one Julian, does that make it a murder of Julians?

[avo-gsy]

So On my 7th day for my Fortune telling with Julian

I was staring at the reversed. WTF looking at Julian.

Is that good....I don’t know Julian.

Welp....You just got me murdered by the Devil, Julian....You offered me that booze....

I drank Hennessy with my aunts.

Yes, I was drunk and got heated in my own home.

Crawl into my bed like a possessed maniac.

No one is allowed to touched me cause it was too much heat beating in my body.

My birthday from couple days ago, but celebrate Yesterday because it's my days off.

BUT REALLY...JULIAN!!

My current situation was me drunk by that booze you gave me.