4 simple ways intelligent people overcome fear of confrontation.
overcoming fear of confrontation.
How to Get Over Your Fear of Confrontation.
Effective communications begin human relationships anywhere and everywhere you find them, then keep them going on smoothly
Effective communications tell you what to do and what not to do to someone to maintain a smooth relationship at home and work.
Conflicts between two people often arise when there’s a breakdown in communication.
When one between the two is courageous to take the initiative to tell the other about how they feel about something, they assert themselves and are happier for it.
On the opposite side, is a timid fellow, a conflict avoidant person that chooses to go through the discomfort of being victim of a negative attitude.
This choice is often made for them by what a force they could have a control of .
What’s that? The fear of confrontation.
Conflict avoidant persons have a phobia for confrontation because they don’t want to experience the intense emotions that come with it.
There are many reasons behind this fear.
The primary reason is inadequate preparation of what to say. This automatically causes lack of confidence in presenting a strong argument.
Other reasons that cause fear of confrontation are;
The fear of failure, another direct consequence of lack of adequate preparations.
Lacking in active listening skills, especially at the workplace.
Listening to understand first, accept and analyze opposing point of view better, share perspective easily, assess concerns or fears of others more deeply and appreciate that it wasn’t something personal.
This awareness is likely to make the conversation less confrontational.
At this point, It’s important to know that the attempt to avoid confrontation is not always borne out of fear.
Some people find arguments that come with confrontations as distractions that have possibilities of affecting their productivity negatively.
So what do this group of people do?
They try to delay confrontation until a time that it’s absolutely necessary to have one for the sake of their mental health and productivity.
But in a workplace setting where the productivity of the whole is held higher than productivity of the sum, it’s necessary to resolve every conflict as it arises.
Here are ways you can overcome your fear of confrontation.
Start by always weighing costs and benefits of having that confrontation.
Weigh what the costs of the confrontation would be and what your personal benefits would be.
a. Loss of valuable time,
b. Having one more member added to the list of detractors in the office,
c. Risking being regarded as intolerant or even toxic.
The benefits may include;
a. A happier you and an improved mental health,
b. You may win a true friend and a supportive team member,
c. It may lead to a brainstorming session that births a great idea that creates a win-win situation for all,
d. It can also be a stepping stone to a career progression. You can never tell.
Start with the next opportunity that requires you to step forward and assert yourself.
Don’t wait until it’s a big one. Use the small ones to build confidence, master your listening skills and the presentation of your argument.
“The best preparation for tomorrow is doing your best today” — H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
So before you have the confrontation, take time out to plan what you want to say.
Adequate preparation is the only sure way to increase your confidence.
Knowing how to say separates winners from losers.
“The difference between successful people and really successful people is that re- ally successful people say no to almost everything.”- Warren Buffett.
Know when to say No. And when you have to say it, say it loud and clear in a way that leaves no one in doubt.
Finally, let the following words be your companion as make your best efforts to overcome the fear of confrontation.
“Staying silent is like a slow growing cancer to the soul and a trait of a true coward. There is nothing intelligent about not standing up for yourself. You may not win every battle. However, everyone will at least know what you stood for—YOU.”- Shannon L. Alder.
