airhead zapruder film

(she/they/it)

[onemillionfurries]

[lesbianbloodritual]

when i was a young woman on tumvlr ten years ago everybody liked american football, tigers jaw, ajj, and teen suicide. and we all had a little tin plate with a candle on it, and we needed to be careful not to let the candle go out because we needed it to read the posts. one time a mutual told me they were scared of their candle going out while their phone was charging at night. the dashboard didn't have the overhead fluorescent lights yet. and we had fan mail, and we liked that comic where the girl is a possum. and the stock market crash hadn't happened yet. i made a lot of money selling my tunblr stocks and i bought a boat. i would take the boat out to sea and lie down on the deck and go on tumbr and answer fan mail, but i had to use the candle to read the fan mail, because we didn't have lights yet. it was very dark back then, and one time i fell into the gap between two posts and twisted my ankle. and some people liked elvis depressedly, also, but i can't say that i was one of them.

[terkaterr]

ah doing ma thing just like god int- (remembers im atheist) just like the universe intend- (remembers i don't believe in determinism) just like noone and nothing intended ever. doin ma thang fucking unpredictable style

[tyrannosaurus-rex]

[prokopetz]

Last night I dreamed that Tumblr used AI to implement a mandatory feature that automatically placed illustrative emojis before all important nouns in posts, like the dialogue in Super Mario Odyssey, except there was something wrong with the AI and it gradually started identifying every noun as "gun".

[coughloop]

[bourtange]

republicans: homeless people should be ground into sausage and fed to schoolchildren

democrats: persons experiencing houselessness should be ground into sausage and fed to schoolchildren

[txttletale]

this post posits a utopian world where either of these parties would support feeding schoolchildren, making it a masterclass in "hopepunk"

[junglejim4322]

I live a very balanced life of noticing things nobody else does and not noticing the things that literally everybody notices

[babishment]

here’s the thing about “it’s never too late” is sometimes you try estrogen and it just doesn’t fucking do anything. what am i supposed to do then huh

[gutterbaby]

I was born at LSD Dream Emulator hospital

[holdoncallfailed]

ever since i was a little girl i knew i wanted to deny location sharing and turn off personalized ads and reject all non-essential cookies and not set up siri and face ID

[babishment]

do you have klaasje on you r tomoardachi lsiladn

alas i do not, im only creating boy miis mostly because i don’t want the few miis that i didn’t make bisexual to all of a sudden rush to date the first girl that i drop on the island. the straight ones are all varying levels of reprehensible

[babishment]

Shawties on squad mode. And they can let it rock? Mmm…. [merges without signaling

[babishment]

we only have boy miis on boy island (acele will not be joining the ravers)

[babishment]

harry and kim had a child his name is Ambrosius ok

[babishment]

turned super mario into a small gnome creature because his demeanor was driving me insane. immediately sat down with khan and talked about liveleak footage

[babishment]

forgive the quality on this but i swear i didn’t tag my first post as pjõl for no reason