trouble always finds me

theatre, musical, history, mythology & mixed fandoms sideblog of captaingondolin | header image: Kit and Will from the stage version of Shakespeare in Love, icon from a mural by Jimmy C. | rarely tagged mess, but you can find my fic & my original posts

[veliseraptor]

i am terminally A Sucker for characters who have a towering and generally earned ego about their own ability and absolutely no self-worth about themselves as a person at all. intoxicating combo.

[txttletale]

efforts towards a "positive vision of masculinity" or whatever are so funny because what these guys are trying to figure out is literally "what's a way of being a good person that's Not For Girls™"

[senso1954]

when a film or tv show takes place somewhere where you have been, it is your sacred duty as viewer to say “i’ve been there” every time you recognize a place

[cuarthol]

When a film or TV show claims to take place somewhere but you been there and it is your sacred duty as a view to say “no the hell that is not there.”

[itsexclusive]

[chapelltobleroan]

“Average person commits 7 war crimes a day” factoid actually false. ‘War Crimes’ odysseus, who went to Troy and invented one new war crime a day in desperation to get home, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

[ochiody]

theyre literally already married

[chapelltobleroan]

"I am Achilles, son of Peleus, the greatest Greek warrior!" "I am Agememnon! Son of Atreus, best of all the Greeks and shepherd of the people!" etc. etc. Boring. Odysseus rolls up to the Trojan war in these

[ethlien]

Odysseus: No, you're cuter

Penelope: No, 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 cuter

Odysseus: No, 𝙮𝙤𝙪'𝙧𝙚 cuter

Telemachus: There are literally over 100 people dead in our house, guys.

[spineless-lobster]

Shit man, this trojan war is fucked. I just saw a guy raise his hands to the sky and say “grey-eyed athena, strengthen my spear” or some similar shit, and he felled 27 men at once before being whisked away by divine mist. The narrator didn’t even mention him, that’s how common shit like this is. My ass is stuck with a bow and 2 arrows. I think I just heard “would to god my rage, my fury would drive me now to hack your flesh away and eat you raw” two groups over. I gotta get the fuck outta here.

[whencartoonsruletheworld]

[chapelltobleroan]

Penelope must have known that Odysseus was a little insane when she married him I mean. Like they got married and he was like haha babe wait before we have our wedding night I gotta show u something. And then he takes her like. Across the island. To the area where she first met him and he’s built a palace there! Which takes years! Wow! And she’s like omg that’s so sweet and he’s like that’s not even the best part! Look! And they go inside. And the place she’s going to fuck this man for the very first time—he has not even gotten pussy yet, this man is in pussy deficit no post-nut clarity available and it shows—is a bed CARVED OUT OF A LIVING TREE. And she’s like hey dude what’s up with that and Odysseus is like. Oh! That’s the olive tree where we first met! I turned it into a bed and then I built a palace around it. And she’s like. I can’t not fuck this little freak.

[ashenmind]

“Living weapon” covers a lot and all of it is hot

[ashenmind]

[whencartoonsruletheworld]

ohhh my god I just fact-checked, Nolan actually DID cut the "Nobody" scene from his Odyssey movie. Mfer that is like cutting the Father reveal from Star Wars. Let me speak in a language you understand this is like not dressing Batman up in his suit. "It was not possible to work it in" the TikTok musical with a budget of $4 and a scratched Hamilton CD managed to work it in in SONG form, step up your FUCKING GAME

[narutwitter]

[cody-a-day]

[selfship-quotes]

I love soulmates but also this-

[qilingxiong]

[alivingtypo]

you can pry starting sentences with 'and' or 'but' out of my cold, dead hands

[today-till-tomorrow]

op how does it feel to be the most correct person on earth