KOPFLOCHANFANG

HEADER: A SCREENSHOT OF XEN FROM HALF-LIFE: BLUE SHIFT. ICON: A SCREENSHOT OF A GLOWING XEN CRYSTAL, FROM HALF-LIFE: BLUE SHIFT, VIEWED FROM BEHIND A FILM COVERING A TUNNEL. WHAT TO KNOW: I AM DIVORCED. I’M IN MY LATE 30’S. I LOVE MY CHILDREN MORE THAN THE WORLD I WOULD WALK THROUGH HEAVEN AND HELL AND THERAPY FOR ALL OF THEM I TRY MY BEST TO BE A GOOD DAD

[life-ennder]

i think completely pre transition trans people should be able to wear one tiny little pronoun pin and get gendered correctly every time. i think cis people should be transitioning just for the fun of it if they want to. i think you should be able to walk into any pharmacy and just buy hrt. i think that little boys should be able to sit in circles and play with dolls and paint each other's nails and make friendship bracelets. i think that little girls should be able to play with flaming monster trucks and play football and get competitive over video games. i think that arson (he/it/paw) should have paw's identity respected and treated as completely normal. i think that we should normalize neopronouns and weird genders and being weird or unusual in general. you should be able to explain your weird one of a kind xenogender to the least queer person on the planet and they should say "oh that's cool!! haven't heard of that gender before". you should be able to wear a tail in public you should be able to make out with your computer if you want i don't fucking care. i love transgenders i love neurodivergent people i love furries i love everyone outside the norm i love freaks i love nerds i love everyone.

[bluesturngold]

[auckie]

My mom wants a white little purse dog, she wants to name jt kevin regardless of it being a girl or boy, and I show her white little bitch dogs a lot as kevin inspo bc I have the selfish motive of wanting a pet while I mooch here at home during quarantine. So I showed her this gif

And she went ‘ouoghh...kevin. I miss him’ and I was gonna point out that she has yet to meet him and she cut me off and was like I see him in my dreams

[steelbeak-deactivated20220602]

100 Gecs is considered classical music in Star Trek

[mavisbeaconofficial]

[tiktoksforlosers]

[deaddolin]

im always thinkjng about that one time i was on register for like 4 hours straight and said over mic "someone blease take over register i am about to become the joker." and they came to relieve me faster thab ive ever seen anyone relieve me before

[savefrog]

Amazing note from baby me:

[skeletalheartattack]

go go gadget extendo legs into heaven

[skeletalheartattack]

go go gadget sucked into airplane jet turbine

[sisterofiris]

Hey students, here’s a pro tip: do not write an email to your prof while you’re seriously sick.

Signed, a person who somehow came up with “dear hello, I am sick and not sure if I’ll be alive to come tomorrow and I’m sorry, best slutantions, [name]”.

[yay855]

I mean, if someone wrote that to me, I’d probably believe they were sick.

[rox-and-prose]

“Slutantions” has me crying laughing

[watermite]

i once emailed my professor with a migraine. a mistake.

“I amsick will not to choir because i have a heache. i Hope its very and i am so sorry

love,

blue”

the subject line was “OW”

[xakumi]

THE SUBJECT LINE IS THE BEST PART JSJFJSJDJS JUST IMAGINE GETTING AN EMAIL WITH NO CONTEXT OTHER THAN “OW”

[themodernsouthernpolytheist]

As someone who has taught college, please send those emails because 1) We WILL believe that; no one would write that on purpose and 2) we need a laugh sometimes.

[asortoflight]

On the other side of this, once after getting taken to the ER by ambulance, I got an email from the professor whose class I’d passed out in, and the message had no text, just the subject line “you good?”

[whisky-gerblin]

Reblogging for the last addition

[badgraph1csghost]

Claritin makes me weird, but I have allergies so there’s about a month and a half block of time where I’m taking Claritin and am just weird most of the time.

Anyway, my last year of college, I got the flu or something in late March and was also taking Mucinex. I told my professor I couldn’t come to class one day by email except I couldnt think of what to say, so my medicated ass decided to make a Fry meme. I think it said something like “Not sure if I can go to class with a head the size of Texas, bottom text.” I didn’t think until the next day that it probably wasn’t socially-acceptable to tell your philosophy professor you weren’t coming to class via Tumblr style memes. When i got back to class, i found that she’d printed it out and taped it to the classroom bulletin board.

[badgraph1csghost]

Oh shit you guys i turned on my WinXP laptop that I used to use back then.

IT WAS ON THE DESKTOP. THIS IS WHAT I SENT.

It’s even worse than i remember it

[worldheritagepostorganization]

World Heritage Post

[sloppystyle]

i have been dying from this video for like 30 minutes

[skittypilled]

MY RIBS HURT SO BAD IT KEEPS GETTING FUNNIER THE LONGER I LOOK

[mf-dude]

[bakersfield-row]

[wheredidalltheusersgo]

[omegaverse]

i tthink some girl just sent her frozen rp to our 200+ student gc and icant bring myself to open it because im afraid it will flood my system with neurotoxins

[dogpuppy]

[beagleboysinc]

ive started going like hi.png hi.jpeg hi.odor hi.exe and its very fun. and i've been EXPANDING it past hi lately. i said goodnight to my brother and partner and we said sleep.exe. we have been using the .webp file format to make whatever said before be an insult

[beagleboysinc]

everyone should do this it's so fun btw