badtz box

I have a Badtz Maru box full of questions culled from early 00's print media. Some people are nice enough to answer them.

[badtzbox]

This gentleman is The Spelunker, host of Smut Cave. When he's not exploring the strangest and smuttiest crannies of the internet he's paling around with demented underground artists and second tier web-celebs. Some how he managed to wriggle to the surface long enough to answer 8 questions from the box.

1. How ambitious are you? S - If you were to cumulatively tally my ambitiousness, it would rank pretty average. I am at times very unambitious and prone to watching every episode of Mystery Science Theater 3000 while falling in and out of blissful, merciful sleep. At other times I am constantly planning and scheming and figuring out how to make fresh batches of smut and other assorted detritus for internet eyeballs. It's up and down and all over the place, like an EKG of a lamb being drowned. 

2. What do you think is manly about you? S - My sonorous voice and my petite, renaissance-painting hands 

3. What are some does and don'ts for having fun at a lake house? S - I feel like anything happening at a lake house is usually a prelude to a brutal horror movie OR The Lake House starring Keanu Reeves and Sandra Bullock. Either way, avoid. 

4. What is it about Texas? S - From those unending ice floes to the sentient obelisk that knows exactly when and how you will die, what ISN'T it about Texas? 

5. How do you manage to use pornography without becoming it? S - This is one of my greatest personal struggles and a temptation I have yet to fully overcome. I'd like to ask the public to respect my privacy on this matter. 

6. How do you want to be remembered? S - [unintelligible gurgling] 

     7. Are you pleased with how "Dream Evil" turned out? S - Any time the words "Swedish" and "Heavy Metal" are in the same sentence, I'm usually at home in comfortable shoes reading a good book.

8. What is your policy about going to strip clubs these days? S - Be polite, dress the brand, always carry more ones than you plan on spending, and never use the ATM in the club the surcharges are DISDAINFUL.

http://smutcave.tumblr.com/

Youtube - https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLB0A6897C009370ED

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/pages/Smut-Cave/232296200294

[badtzbox]

This is Harris Smith. Not only is he really good at holding small dogs he also co-hosts the wonderful Negative Pleasure radio show on Newtown Radio and runs Negative Pleasure Publications, releasing some of the best underground comics around right now. As if you couldn't tell from the picture he's also a really nice guy. So nice he answered 15 questions! 1. What do you grow in your garden? H.S.- Piles and piles of books 2. Do you drink coffee? H.S.- I used to drink coffee, for many years, since I was a kid, lots and lots of coffee, but about 10 years ago it started making me really sick every time I drank it, so I stopped.  Last year I had a craving for it, so I made some cold brewed decaf, and that was really great, so I was drinking that for a while, and then started doing cold brewed half-decaf, half-regular, but then I just sort of forgot about it, so, no, I don't drink coffee. 3. Does it inspire your creative output? H.S.- No.  I find that art and popular culture that venerates coffee to be uninspiring and uninspired. 4. How does it feel to still put on the schoolboy suit? H.S.- I take pride in my youthful looks. 5. When you were growing up, what was the movie that had the most impact on you? H.S.- Like any kid who grew up when I did, I liked the Indiana Joneses, the James Bondses and the Star Warses and whatever, but the movies that really made an impact on me then were the less popular ones, although I didn't realize they weren't as popular at the time, because they were playing in the theater, so they must have been popular, right?  Anyway, Buckaroo Banzai was a big one, as were Remo Williams: The Adventure Begins and Dune.  It didn't occur to me at the time how strange some of those movies were, or that something like Dune was basically incomprehensible, especially to a little kid.  To me, it was just a more interesting looking Star Wars.  Buckaroo Banazi and Remo Williams were my heroes, though. 6. Do you ever get truly ancient slappers throwing themselves at you? H.S.- No woman has ever thrown herself at me, ancient or contemporary. 7. Why are you famous? H.S.- At best, I'm very moderately Tumblr famous, and vaguely known in the comic book world, but I'm not famous, not really.  To the extent that I am or try to be, it's almost entirely for validation, which I never get, and to meet girls, which I never do. 8. Have you ever been confused with model Jerry Hall? H.S.- We were in the A&P once trying to figure out the difference between a sweet potato and a yam. 9. What does your mom call you? H.S.- Harris, in an exasperated tone 10. Wait, what's on your lip right now? H.S.- Smith's Rosebud Salve.  A reliable family salve. 11. What makes you happy? H.S.- The act of creation, making things happen, getting acknowledgment for my work.  Conversely, being a good person. 12. What was Jon Benet like without all that lovely make up? H.S.- Just some little kid. 13. Do you have any interesting diet tips? H.S.- Lots of greek yogurt, brussels sprouts, cauliflower and sweet potatoes, not a lot of red meat or carbs. 14. What's the most important thing your father ever taught you? H.S.- unconditional love 15. What time do you wake up? H.S.-  during the work week, between 7:30 and 8:30.  on the weekend, whenever my body decides it's time.

publishing: http://negativepleasure.storenvy.com music: http://chernobylskul.bandcamp radio: http://www.newtownradio.com/shows/negative-pleasure/ ∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆

[badtzbox]

Visit Original Link

Nick Barbeln makes music as Snake , does digital video & design work, and smokes weed. He's also nice enough to answer 4 questions.

SNAKE LIFE   /   SNAKE HOUSE

[badtzbox]

Dave Destroyer makes amazing VHS video works, does stand up comedy, and makes music as Hiss & Hum. He's also nice enough to answer five questions from the Badtzbox.

[badtzbox]

Ladies and gentlemen meet MANSLAUGHTER! Metal Master, Culinary Queen,all around bad ass, and nice enough to answer some questions.

How are you?

M: FUCKING SHITTY

How can beer make you fat when it's actually 98% water

M: Made me fat, that's why I feel shitty.

What is the most memorable ass whuppin' you ever gave or got?

M: My brother broke three of my ribs by sitting on my lap and pushing against the front seat of the car. brutal. what a dick.

What were you doing in a strip club?

M: Most likely taking my lame boyfriend there who thinks that strippers are lame so yeah, what the fuck am I doing here?!

What about ripping hens to pieces, did you get to do any of that?

M: I've ripped so many fucking hens to pieces its redick

Do you find Jesus to be a babe?

M: Yeah Jesus looks like one of those sexy motorcycle dudes.

What do you think Tank Girl would think of you?

M: She'd probably try to jump my bones. All the ladies love me.

Do you feel that Dada, Surrealism, Fluxus, Situationism, et al. have become the dominant artistic language of the 20th century?

M: In my world, yes. In reality, probably not.

So, how did you get involved driving tour busses for metal bands?

M: They were like "yo, we need a driver we're too wasted to drive" and I was like "ok bitch"

How do you feel about the peace treaty between the IRA and the British government?

M: I don't really give a fuck about all that shit. burrrrrp.

[badtzbox]

So, I used to date a doctor. Not just any doctor, Dr. Knight. How bad ass is that? Dr. Knight doesn't enact street vengeance, or even write prescriptions, but, the good doctor was nice enough to answer five questions.

1. So how does one become a director of a feature film without having film credits or a film background or anything like that? DR. K: I'm sending the answer to this one (a photo) separately

(SEE BELOW)

 2. H.G. Wells said that history is a race between education and catastrophe, how do you see your role in this race?

DR. K: I am so the meat in that sandwich!

3. What's the worst border crossing you've ever done?

DR. K: I didn't even know you were aware I worked at Borders!  My section was the Religion/Metaphysical section, and I distinctly remember having unexpectedly started my period and trying to hold it in as best I could with my thighs and taking tiny steps toward the restroom while being pursued by a chatty customer who didn't think the selection of books about subterranean aliens and their cave systems was comprehensive enough!

4. Why did you start taking drugs?

DR. K: I wanted to see the electric cats, like most people I guess...

5. What's the worst record that you own... and enjoy?

DR. K:

#1: