Words
8 letters or 7 letters are the hardest to say, or even talk about. You might say to yourself, what are you talking about. The band âWhy Donât We?â has a song â8 Lettersâ
âYou know me the best,
You know my worst, see me hurt, but you don't judge
That, right there, is the scariest feeling
Opening and closing up again I've been hurt so I don't trust
Now here we are, staring at the ceiling
I've said those words before but it was a lie
And you deserve to hear them a thousand times If all it is eight letters
Why is it so hard to say?â
That a great question, why is it so hard to say? When we hurt someone or miss someone, there are a thousand reasons to say I love you. The second part 7 letters, to me these are the hardest words for me to say: âIâm sorryâ.
But if you take a step back and think about it, people throw these 2 words out like they are going out of style. We hurt someone, âI am sorryâ, piss off a bunch of people, âI am sorryâ. The truth is, when it really truly matters itâs hard to say.
29 June 2012, I looked at my daughters for the first time since I was blown up.
On 9 June 2012, my Platoon and I hit a large IED and I woke up 2 weeks later in San Antonio Texas, asking for them. When they got there I had played in my head a thousand times what I was going to say, yet when they walked into the room I froze. I couldnât speak. What do you say to the Loves of your life? I wanted to say those words, but what would they say, would they turn their backs on me for what had happened? When I could finally speak, these 8 letters came out of my mouth. I AM SORRY, and yes, I LOVE YOU was next. They ran to me and hugged me, I had to them sit down and I showed them my injuries, told them how sorry I was that they had to see me like this. They didnât care., they were just happy to be with me.
We get scared when the unknown hits us. My question to you is did Jesus get scared when they hammered him to the cross? Did he yell out âFather What Heckâ or âWhat are you are thinkingâ, No. He said Father âForgive themâ.
That day in the hospital I was scared of the unknown, my daughters sprang into action, they started protecting me like also, each one of them took night shifts, one by one of them stayed by my side, they would scare the crap out of anyone that would came in, they could tell my pain level, and would get the nurses nightly, but they all knew which daughter would be there each night and would bring them something special or teach them a different way to care for me.
What is love? Love is when you choose to be at your best when the other person is not at their best. Love is when what you want is never important. But what the other person needs and wants is always paramount. If you truly love someone, these should both stand out, I would give my life for my daughters.
A few months ago I had to humble myself again before my family. I was in a helicopter that crashed, I was more scared about telling them I was hurt and about the new injuries and wasnât sure how I would tell them that I might not walk again. This time my 17 year old daughter was graduating from high school one week after the crash, I told everyone I was not missing it, I spoke the Lord and begged him to get me back to Vegas, He did, I was back into Vegas, but I couldnât walk, I couldnât sit up, After she walked the stage, she came to see me at the hospital and I all could say was those 8 letters again, â I am Sorry! And I love youâ. She said it was ok, was it really? HELL NO it wasnât, but she forgave me anyway.
My daughters almost lost me in 2012, and I swore to them I wouldnât get hurt, But I screwed that up. I have done things in my life I am not proud of and things I am very proud of. One thing is how great my daughters are. My wife and I did a great job in raising them, well, truth of it is my wife raised them, mostly. 4 deployments, schools, Drill Sergeants duty, Airborne school instructor duty, I was gone a lot, I am sure several of you can relate, but I wouldnât change it for the world.
Now my favorite weekends are when we turn all the lights off and watch Star Wars, or Harry Potter. I owe my life to my family; my wife would say itâs my brothers and sisters. To me itâs all of them.
I have tried to kill myself twice, but failed both times, why? Because the Love of my family and Our Lord saved me. I should have died in the IED, attack or fire fights I had been in or the helicopter crash. Now my family stands next to me and the other volunteers in BattleForged Nation to help stop veteran suicide. We HELP overcome that feeling, We HELP you start to heal and help your family, and the last one is SHARE, we share when are ready to talk about what happen, so others can deal with whatever may come up or that they may help someone else in need.
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