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Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
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shark vs the universe
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DEAR READER
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Love Begins
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Red Canticle
Cusp. Precipice. Verge. Edge. Brink. Altarside, I await the start of the ritual. Altarknelt, I offer my prostration as oblation.Altarbound, I let them sink the dagger in my torso. I burn frankincense and bear witness to madness of thesecret workings of the world. The dance of the fair fae folk. They are insidious with their conniving sneers. Spirits in silver soar some mere inches away from…
What's the opposite of a drag path?
I channel magic at 130 wpm. There once was a wizard. In need of more urgency, he did some things that would make him a more timely wizard, such as messing with the time space continuum. And soon enough he discovered that he’d erased his existence from the present and future. And so I’ll tell you again, there once was a wizard.
Invoking sincerity out of insincere people (pt. 2)
This is part 2 of a series. To read part 1, please click here. Sometimes, there’s nothing you can achieve out of invoking sincerity out of someone. It will only result in chaos. You have to ask yourself, are you willing to face the consequences? If you are, if you are in the ‘come what may’ mindset, then proceed, because it is liberating. Record Them Snoring Six years ago, during peak Covid…
Circumstantial Evidence
Would that I could, I would that it weren’t too late, but alas. Shuffled priorities make me crawl on all fours on broken glass. I would lie to you and tell you I have visited many faraway lands; I have only ever intensely hallucinated with books in my hands. There comes a time when a man as myself grows tired of trying. The collective exhale around him sounds like the world dying. Black…
How To Invoke Sincerity Out of Insincere People (Pt 1)
What I’m about to tell you has saved me from being robbed, assaulted, and murdered. Get Them High I had a potentially life changing internship offer in Abbottabad. Understand that I’d dropped out after the Head of Department at the university had tried to coerce me into doing his PhD project for him. So my life was quite derailed. I had plans. I was going to use that computer science degree to…
Song of Myself
I pray to myself. It’s a start. I invoke my higher self, the writer. He is wise. He knows how to bring it and bring it good. I am not always him. Lately I’ve been him less and less. He’s mysterious, off in some distant land in the far flung recesses of my mind where he’s made a place for himself to live and thrive. In my mind, he says be and it is so. There are entire cities in my mind. In…
Would I go back in time?
The assumption being that everything I’ve done would be wiped and I’d have to do it all over again, but I’d retain the knowledge and experience I’ve gained. Fuck no. You think I would ever want to go back to my 21-year-old self? I was malnourished, underweight, had a long beard that I don’t even know why it was there, and I was extremely uncertain about everything in life. You think I’d go back…
"This is to be mortal, And seek the things beyond mortality."
I do a terrible thing with laundry where I do it once every ten days. Now, on day one after I’ve done laundry, if I so much as sweat once, I change clothes and off they go in the to-be-washed pile. But on day seven, you will see me wearing the same shirt for the next three days. And I’ll be beating myself up over running out of clothes this fast and that I should do my laundry more often than…
Dear America
There was a version of you that I was raised on, a version I’d have loved to visit. There was an America that my father would talk about wistfully, and I’d almost imagine him on a ranch in Texas with a cigar between his teeth and a cowboy hat on his head. An America where my uncles, motorheads all, would love to ride from coast to coast on their choppers or an RV or a Ford F-150. I had magazines…
hairball
Good grief! I am a bundle of sorrow wrapped up in an itchy blanket. If it isn’t this weather that will be the death of me then it will be whether I can weather one calamity after the other in such quicksuccession. Jonathon Strange and Mr. Norrell is proving to be verylaborious a read with its Dickensian prose, its meandering monologuesabout why magic has disappeared from England. I should wish…
Acid
Let there be dog tallow, bone marrow, and yarrow root in my inventoryI have to see a witch about a curse; my chariot a hearse, the charioteer along-leather-coat, tall-black hat wearing, white-bearded husk of a man carrying a tinge of musk underneath all the death odor that tells a story;more precisely, the story of my unearthing and the puking of black sludgeas I was dug out and made to trudge in…
Abe's Recap of 2025
But first, let me bid fare adieu to the year that was 2025. The year when I moved into my own place and realized that I was capable of so much more than I’d thought I was. The year I finally got over my reading slump and ended up devouring not one or two or three or four but seven fantastic books from September to December. The books are: Alchemised by Senlinyu Piranesi by Susanna Clarke Name…
Calling upon my father's spirit
Father. Knower of Names. First of us. Receiver of the first soul. The flesh of your stomach stripped after Satan, seething, spat there. Was the dog that was made from that mix of spit and flesh your pet dog? I demand from this world fame, wealth, acclaim. How did it feel when all of angelkind prostrated before you? I heard that on the Day of Covenant your soul refused to going into your…
String me up like cheaper kites
Arm crumpled, burned you dim atop the mountaintop, Who are you afraid of? You have leveled fields, slayed beasts, dead men by the thousands recount your name as their cause of death at the last register.Gray your hair turning white, darkness takes you, you strayout of thought and time, stars wheel overhead, every day as longas the life age of earth, but it is not the end, you feel light in you…
We're so back, baby!
And about damn time. If I were a pessimist, I’d say it was too late. But I look at the glass half full and acknowledge the glass. The fact that it is there, unshattered still, holding however much water. I am a relief-ist. When I turned 31, several misfiring pistons ceased their frictional pumping and thrusting. I woke up to rain. Lots of rain in September, and a handful of newly bought books as…
Dungeon Master
I can’t keep doing itimpoverished of spiritchronic fatigue syndromeI am bound to my home my guitar-strings rustymy bookshelf dustyI ain’t been to HollywoodI ain’t been to RedwoodI ain’t crossed the ocean for a Heart of GoldMisery loves companyand I, alone, am miserable.Where is Brennan Lee Mulligan?Where is Matt Mercer?Where is Deborah Ann Woll?Where is Samantha Beart?other than on my computer…
Why am I awake?
I don’t know why I’m awake. I woke up at 2:48 am and that’s strange because I went to bed knackered after a long day involving reading Mistborn, grocery runs, and work. It’s 8 degrees (that’s 47 Fahrenheit for my American readers), and my room’s window is coated with condensation. I turned the heater on, but it’s not living up to its name. I ate leftover pizza from two days ago. It was…