blake kathryn
One Nice Bug Per Day
YOU ARE THE REASON
wallacepolsom
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
we're not kids anymore.
Three Goblin Art
occasionally subtle
Sade Olutola
Monterey Bay Aquarium
Andulka
Xuebing Du
i don't do bad sauce passes
tannertan36
No title available
AnasAbdin
@theartofmadeline
Love Begins
Janaina Medeiros
Mike Driver
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@beavisofhampton
I believe that beavers were bred (whether by the blind forces of evolution or a prehistoric Yakub of the swamp rats) to act as they do by instilling in their nature a highly refined PERVERSION... their "instinct" is not the dour Protestantism of the office drone or the worker bee but FETISHISM elevated to a way of life. The lodge, the dam, the hydraulic engineering β they're GETTING OFF ON IT, the way you or I would get off on whipping a slave.
Spindly she-twink in painted-on jeans idling about the city at two hours after noon, staring longingly at a sign that reads MATCHA HAS ARRIVED! After the Restoration, brothers, we of decent birth shall be permitted to hoist them over a shoulder and carry them away. It's just normal. It's healthy. It's a standard operation. But democracy has made it illegal to be straight.
I find it so funny when you canβt tell whether two gorgeous popular girls are actually dating or just rlly over the top. Like sheβll post a pic kissing her cheek and caption it βthe most wonderful girl in the world, donβt know what I would do without u my love π βand girl #2 will comment βmy gorgeous babe π©ββ€οΈβπβπ©love youuuuβ and somehow theyβll both be heterosexuals
it was so incredibly confusing to have beautiful girls talk to me like that in my teens and early twenties omgβ¦. straight girls are so confusing theyβll be like yes wifey i love you iβd leave my man for you scissor sisters for life iβd fuck you. but they donβt like pussy βοΈand you have to remember that key detail
Very confused. Why do they not jack each other off? Do they lack the warrior spirit?
This shall be our lucky cat. Lucky cock. Rub it for good luck. Bobblecock. Wobblecock. We're going back to Rome. To the days of Biggus Dickus. To the luck of Lord Priapus. We can make it do the meatspin. We shall & must return! By government decree the Restoration shall order the installation of a fully motorised statue of Priapus in every restaurant... honi soit qui mal y pense, FAGGOT!
Democracy manifest! Labor was always there. The ploughmen and stonecutters we have had with us since those directors of men whom Lincoln called capital, as if they were some unearthly, less-than-human force, developed mortar and the plough. In the time since Lincoln, who had never seen and could not imagine a car, met his sic semper, it has been conclusively demonstrated that labor is a leech upon the productive forces of the higher element of man: a primitive element, applied with success in primitive times, but nonetheless a creature which sucks blood one would prefer to leave unsucked. When you buy a car, a chariot of steel, no longer requiring horses which piss and shit, you pay not only the cost of the materials, and of the machines and facilities β the capital in the sense used by merchants, who as a rule have neither cattle nor chattel β but also for the upkeep of those pissing, shitting laborers which "capital" has yet to figure out how to economise upon through automation. And those of decent birth must now compete with these horrible Fordists who've made it quite prohibitive, for the time being, to afford a decent retinue. In material terms it's less noble than those parts of Africa where you can still trade in a half-dozen cows to acquire a third or fourth wife.
hard to overstate how much "american culture exerts strong influences on other anglophobe countries" is not my problem as an american
June is "international" pride month because of something that happened in America? well i dont care when the rest of y'all celebrate pride. go be annoyed at your own country's citizens for being ameriboos.
another illustrative example: american fast food does not taste good. if mcdicks has displaced your local traditional cuisine, your traditional cuisine must have tasted horrible
Wrong again! American fast food is adequate. It's basically decent. It's not unharmonious. It's got meat and it doesn't taste like a rat moved in from a spice warehouse and built a nest and pissed and shat and died in it. Most traditional cuisines that compete with American food are the culinary equivalent of the smoke detector chirp. Blown-out car subwoofer chili, generous helpings of seeds that taste like dirt. Not to mention the issue of "rice bowls". Rice bowels. Straight from the toilet. One would do better on turnips and haggis, or pigs' feet and herring, or brennivin and putrefied shark. Da wypepo dey ain' een motor oil dey food π€£π€£π€£π€£π€£π€£π€£
i feel we don't really disagree here beavis, i just think "adequate" is not per se "good." And the foods that get superseded by maccas are not even adequate; accounting for the fact that "tradition" often persists when it is only moderately inferior, they must not even be merely bad. ergo, they are horrible.
there's a reason chinese-american restaurants do good business (they sell chicken nuggets coated in flavored corn syrup) while most japanese restaurants struggle to stay in business even in japan (they sell takoyaki instead). the ethnic food that plays well in the imperial core doesn't get outcompeted by hamburger on its homefront, but it doesn't outcompete it in the imperial core either (i.e. tradition persists, but as a respectable pluralism of equals that excludes the lessers).
There are plenty of ramen shops, perhaps because all the pho has gone watery. Developments in the star anise market? Can we get one of Napoleon's or Wellington's banker descendants on the line? What's worse, many of them don't offer tripe anymore. It's not proper pho without tripe! Nowadays if you want tripe you've got to go to a Sichuanese restaurant and pray they haven't gone for Jimbo Zhang's Big Ol' Hootin' Ass-Rippin' Fuck Pepper. No thank you, Mr. Zhang, I would quite prefer for my anus to remain unmolested. The tropical races are always trying to do this sort of thing. Nonetheless! Most restaurants needlessly overcomplicate the job of a cuisine, which is to deliver a hearty slab of meat in a pleasant and efficient manner. Grains are the "traditional cuisine" of sons of nothing everywhere and it stands to reason that the capitalists would outcompete their slops and glops by tricking them into eating beef. One can procure robust specimens without dipping overmuch into the coffers thanks to the efforts of the mercantile class in perfecting a gerbil-food wrapper for Salisbury steak.
hard to overstate how much "american culture exerts strong influences on other anglophobe countries" is not my problem as an american
June is "international" pride month because of something that happened in America? well i dont care when the rest of y'all celebrate pride. go be annoyed at your own country's citizens for being ameriboos.
another illustrative example: american fast food does not taste good. if mcdicks has displaced your local traditional cuisine, your traditional cuisine must have tasted horrible
Wrong again! American fast food is adequate. It's basically decent. It's not unharmonious. It's got meat and it doesn't taste like a rat moved in from a spice warehouse and built a nest and pissed and shat and died in it. Most traditional cuisines that compete with American food are the culinary equivalent of the smoke detector chirp. Blown-out car subwoofer chili, generous helpings of seeds that taste like dirt. Not to mention the issue of "rice bowls". Rice bowels. Straight from the toilet. One would do better on turnips and haggis, or pigs' feet and herring, or brennivin and putrefied shark. Da wypepo dey ain' een motor oil dey food π€£π€£π€£π€£π€£π€£π€£
I support recreational and erotic testosterone use
Nicko Cecchini (Canadian, d.o.b. unknown) - Mightosis (2026)
I don't believe in Abu Dhabi. I don't believe it's a place. Abu Dhabi? It's not a name that places have. Abu Dhabi. I'm from Eeby Deeby. The emirate of Blobby. Ooga Booga Boogie. I'm Babar from Barbar Barbata. I'm a wokie from Okefenokee. I'm Apu from Abu Dhabi. I'm Baba Yaga Bobby. I'm Matcha Ube Dobby. It's gazelles, dogg! It's mothafuckin' deers and shit. My wife gave birth to some venison rats. Now they call me Abu Dhabi. Tanks to damakracy I can boot in your iraqtions. Ummagumma. Cummy tummy. Unga bungy. Scattahoochee. In da navy. Hootin' Labubu DaBooby DaBaby bin Dobby da Doobie. It's fake.
Hell is a teenage chud.
#chud blogging #diary of a chud #chudhood #chud interrupted #this is a chudblog #lana del chud #thus is what makes us chuds
Kuromi pregnant. Let's get those numbers up! 2026 year of breeding. 2026 year of rawdog, 2026 year of fertility rates. 2026 cult of the lifegiving phallus, public veneration of Priapus, fertility ritual, Kuromi in wheat fields pregnant. The future belongs to those Kuromi who show up for it. Kuromi bears legion of conquering warrior sons. Kuromi sacrifice bull at altar of Priapus. Kuromi become pregnant in ecstatic rites. Kuromi bear legion of powerful warrior sons. Kuromi warrior lineage ten thousand years. Kuromi warrior lineage inherits the fucking earth. Kuromi pregnant. Shinzo Abe mindset Kuromi pregnant! Fucking inherits the earth. Shinto Priapus ritual, Roman Shinto Priapus ritual, Kuromi pregnant, sound breeding, ancestry, lineage. Cultivation of sound breeding, propagation of Kuromi genes, Kuromi family life in warrior cult of Priapus pregnant. Fountain of life Kuromi pregnant, warrior lineage Kuromi pregnant, veneration of the lifegiving phallus in Shinto rite Kuromi pregnant. Kuromi fruitful and multiply pregnant. Fuck raw and get Kuromi pregnant. Ten thousand years of Kuromi warrior lineage, Kuromi bloodline inherits the earth, wolfcult rawdog Kuromi pregnant.
Octopus sex is bizarre. The males' specialized sperm-depositing arm feels around inside all the females' organs until a special hormone sensor finds her ovaries.
Okay so the problem with writing about octopus reproduction is that everybody wants it to be a metaphor. Alienation. Evolutionary distance. Nature is fundamentally weird and unknowable, woooo. When actually it's just a really elegant solution to a specific materials-science problem nobody wants to talk about because the words "sperm" and "ovaries" are in it.
Like, here's the actual problem. You're a male octopus. You need to deliver sperm to a female octopus. You are both made of muscle tissue that can squeeze through a hole the size of your eyeball. No rigid structures, no internal skeleton, nothing maintaining consistent spatial relationships between organs. The ovaries could be anywhere in that shape-shifting bag of protein. It's basically trying to deliver a package to a specific apartment in a building where the rooms rearrange themselves every time someone takes a breath.
So evolution did what evolution does and built a sensor array.
The hectocotylus β that's the modified third right arm that does the deed β has chemoreceptors tracking specific hormonal gradients. Following increasing concentrations like a submarine following a thermocline, except instead of temperature differentials you're tracking estradiol and vitellogenin and whatever cocktail of proteins says "eggs developing here." Arm goes in, feels around (and I mean feels in the chemical sense, taste-touching its way through the organs), finds the target, delivers the spermatophores. Basically a biological smart bomb with haptic feedback.
Which, fine, makes sense. Cool engineering solution. Here's the part that gets me though.
The weird part isn't that octopuses evolved this. The weird part is we've known about the specialized arm since Aristotle β he described it in History of Animals, though he figured it was a kind of auxiliary penis β and didn't figure out the hormone-sensing piece until last year, when a team at Woods Hole stuck GoPros on captive octopuses and noticed the arm wasn't randomly groping around in there. It was following specific paths. Making specific turns. Clearly responding to chemical information we couldn't see. Took them another six months to isolate the receptors and figure out what they were detecting.
(The actual paper is behind a paywall but the key finding is that the hectocotylus has about 10,000 times the concentration of hormone-specific chemoreceptors as the other seven arms, mostly clustered in the suckers of the distal third, which explains why that's the part that goes deepest. The researchers call it "unprecedented target-seeking capability in any known reproductive system," which is science-speak for holy shit this thing is basically a guided missile.)
And here's the thing that really bugs me about it, the part I keep turning over.
And what kills me β we've been using octopuses as model organisms for neural network research since the 1960s. More neurons in the arms than the central brain, distributed processing, the whole nine yards. And nobody thought to ask whether maybe that distributed intelligence extended to the reproductive system. Everyone was so focused on how they solve mazes and open jars that we just sort of missed the part where they'd evolved a self-guiding reproductive organ that makes GPS look primitive.
The sensing is so precise, by the way, that males can apparently tell not just where the ovaries are but how mature the eggs are, whether the female has mated before, even her nutritional status β all from chemical signatures picked up during what we used to think was just awkward cephalopod groping.
The metaphor people want is alienation. The better metaphor is probably something about how we keep looking for intelligence in the places we expect to find it β problem-solving, tool use, social behavior β when evolution doesn't care about our categories and will stick sophisticated sensing and processing capabilities wherever they're needed, including inside your reproductive organs. Though actually that's not really a metaphor either, that's just what happened.
There is no metaphor. We ought to have superintelligent prehensile guided missile penises. We can't let the sea monsters win.
I was looking for photos of one physical condition that happens to penises and came across this photoset.
Enough with the "fuckboys". Enough! This summer shall be the season of the FUCKMAN.
humiliating to be attracted to a conventionally attractive person. I thought I was a more sensitive and refined pervert than this
