the gruel of the future—today!

tämyo kropnulaṃ skam pñintu ke ne kulypal yātlune

[oneheadtoanother]

[vriskakinnieaynrand]

seeing double dactyl summer artifacts in the wild. in the realm of meat

[vriskakinnieaynrand]

i should commission fursona art. in case i ever want to use mastodon. it'd feel wrong to use mastodon without having good fursona art

[ballwizard]

meows loud as fuck shattering all glass within 3 miles no survivors

[scentedstrawberries]

[festeredhearts]

[bitbd]

This is what I mean when I yearn for contemporary fiction that's unreservedly, capital-W Weird. So many anthology publishers and yet many of them never reach this level of purity.

[vriskakinnieaynrand]

can't imagine what it's like to be a kind of person capable of believing that hollywood could do the odyssey as anything but a lame modern subversion. don't worry, charlie brown! you'll get the football this time!

[port-canalave]

“‘bright’ laser engraved text from the internet on found oyster shell. 2018”

trystanwilliams2

[nettlewildfairy]

quick question why does your cat command you to print something on the printer

he really likes to watch the printer print. It seems like he thinks there’s some kind of creature in there that I have the mysterious power to summon that he can then hunt for sport?

he sticks his entire arm inside the printer and breaks it if I don’t put some kind of physical burrier between him and the printer but like he purrs so loud when it starts printing and will beg harder for people to print things than he will for treats.

he just loves hunting the printer so much. he even tried to climb inside the place the paper comes out of the printer when he was a kitten.

No matter where he is in the apartment if the printer makes a noise he sprints full speed. He also knows which button to press to get the printer to print like the ink levels info and alignment sheet, so you have to make sure it’s off or locked up or he will print nonstop himself and then attack the printer and jam it.

is it inconvenient that my cat is obsessed with the printer? yes, but damn if it’s not also adorable.

I don’t actually have a ton of photos of him sticking his whole arm in there though because stopping him from jamming the printer is usually a task that involves all of my arms and also all of my roommates arms.

[nettlewildfairy]

Thinking about the post because I had to unplug the printer today because he broke into the closet and printed the info sheet 3 times in a row and did bite me when I tried to stop him

The face of a boy who is sulking because I expelled him from the printer closet.

[nettlewildfairy]

the good news is that my cat is so happy, the bad news is that my sticker cutting machine that I got recently instils the same curiosity and lust for violence in my cat that my printer does so no matter what I do I will not know a moments peace.

[vriskakinnieaynrand]

sometimes i hear total eclipse of the heart and i'm like. that's not a very good cover of the hurra torpedo song

[vriskakinnieaynrand]

i've always taken off my shirts the quote unquote girl way. and you know what? zero estradiol blowdarts. this sucks!

[lathiat]

i have GOT to pee more

[lathiat]

THIS IS A UTI POST NOT A PEE FETISH POST THIS TIME

[lathiat]

[vriskakinnieaynrand]

every time i see something labeled queer i ask myself if i count. surely not, right? i mean i've topped a few guys but who hasn't

[captain-price-returns]

[flagellant]

i dont know much about how phalloplasty works but i have to imagine that it involves a pottery wheel and spinning you really fast and fingering you until your clit becomes a magnificent ceramic vase

[vriskakinnieaynrand]

alas! however decent a crowd you find, when going out, however reasonable a position, eventually you'll have to go out for water, or a piss. and when you fight your way back to the next available space you may find you've walked into the big bang theory. like excuse me epic sir why are you on the dancefloor in a hoodie? it can't be to dance, as indeed it is not