After probably years since the last time I wrote something, I’m going to leave this here. I hope you like it :)
I heard him slamming his office door and going outside to God knows where. I fell on my knees in the middle of the room and let everything that I’d been keeping inside me for the past few hours leave my body. Tears were rolling from my eyes and all I could do was staying on the floor, closing my eyes and pretending that everything that was going on in my life was a nightmare and I wasn’t about to fuck up my relationship with Wilmer because of Phill.
It’s been some weeks since Phill called me on his office for a meeting. I thought it was something about the tour, which made me excited for it. I drove there with Batman seating on the passenger seat wearing his seatbelt. It was such a beautiful sunny day until I stepped inside the building and everything got dark.
I left there crying and Batman kept looking at me with his puppy eyes worried about his mommy. When I got in my car, I rested my head on the steering wheel. I closed my eyes and tried to do the same thing I was doing at Wilmer’s office.
When my heart had calmed down, I heard my phone ringing. I snorted and looked at the screen expecting everyone else but him. His handsome face was displayed on the phone while he kissed my cheek. We looked so genuine happy…
I threw it away from me, having no idea where it had landed. I looked at Batman and he seemed scared. I was pissed at the world, at everyone, mainly at myself. I was scaring my baby…our baby. I put him on my lap and he gave me many sweet kisses and that really made me smile. I couldn’t be more thankful for having in my life, the same feeling I felt and will always feel with Buddy. My two baby boys, my angels who came to this world to take care of me.
On that moment, I’d already regret not answering Will. I looked for my phone and after some minutes I found it on the backseat right next to a beautiful red rose bouquet. It was his. I was sure about that. Wilmer loved doing stuff like that for me. Random surprises with no reason behind it, just because he wanted to make me smile. Unfortunately, on that time, it made me smile and cry. Not because I was so happy that I couldn’t contain my emotions. I cried once again, because I knew I was about to see all of those things going away from me.
I turned on the car engine and started driving home. It took longer than any other time I had done the same way. Maybe because I was feeling like everything was taking too long to pass by, or maybe just because I was trying to memorize that journey in my head, because that one might be the last time I’d do it.
The gate opened automatically as soon as my car got close to it. After parking it besides Wilmer’s, I looked in the mirror. It wasn’t that bad. Maybe he wouldn’t notice I’d cried for the past two hours.
I took my purse, the bouquet and Batman, and headed towards the front door. The house was silent, which meant that he was sleeping or working out. I left my stuff in our bedroom while Batman went to his little bed beside ours. He was tired and deserved a nap.
I went to the kitchen to find something where I could put the roses in. When I did, I took it to our bedroom and put on the nightstand on my side of the bed.
With a sigh, I left the room and made my way towards my man. As I got closer, I could hear him working on his fight moves. He was so focused on it that didn’t see me standing on the door. Usually watching him working out drives me insane, on a sexy way. He is just too handsome and having him all sweaty in front of me doesn’t make it easy for me to control my emotions.
“Hi, baby” I decided to say after a while. He took off his earphones and smiled looking at me. “Hi, sweetheart. I didn’t see you there.” I tried my best to play off a smile that he would believe in. He came closer and left a sweaty and sweet kiss on my lips. “I missed you, Mrs. Lovato, or should I say, sooner or later Valderrama.” That was just too much to hear. And there I was crying again.
“I’m so sorry, Demi. I didn’t mean to make you cry. Are you okay?” He whipped my tears with his soft thumbs. “Yes.” I lied. It felt like years since the last time I had lied to him. We made a promise to never lie again, always tell the truth, even though it might hurt. However, I wasn’t ready to have that type of conversation with him.
“Let’s go inside. I should’ve finished it a half hour ago. Let me take care of my baby now.” He wrapped his arms around me and we left the gym room. He opened the kitchen door so I could get in first. I smiled passing by him and he did the same. It was impossible to not smile around him. I could be dying inside, my mind could be going insane, but nothing matters when I have him.
“Do you want tea? I can make some for both of us.” I nodded and looked down staring at the pair of cup we had bought for us. Matching love cups. I remembered when we went to the mall and I saw them, I acted like a little kid at the store trying to convince Wilmer to get it. He said he was too old to drink by them, so I headed to the cashier and bought them. “I bought. Now you are gonna use it with me liking it or not.” He laughed and we left the store.
Having those memories back in my mind made me laugh by myself. Wilmer looked back at me as if I was crazy. “I know I’m such an amazing boyfriend. I can make my girlfriend laugh on a matter of seconds.” He joked. “Who said you are amazing? I hate you.” I joked as well and stood up from the chair. I wrapped my arms around his torso while he filled our cups. “I’m just kidding. I love you.” I said resting my head on his shoulder.
He turned around and kissed my forehead. “I love you more. Never doubt it.” We took our cups and headed to the TV room. He sat first so I could sit on his lap. “Do you wanna watch something in specific?” He asked while getting the remote control. “No. You can choose. I just wanna hear your heart beat for now.” I replied and rested my head on his torso and did what I said. Somehow it made me feel better. It was like nothing bad had happened on that dat. As if I’d never had that conversation with Phill. As if there were just us in this horrible world.
Three days passed until I found courage enough inside me to talk to Wilmer. He was in his office reading the script for NCIS. When he told me the news he had got a role, I was in shock. I screamed. I cried. I was so happy for him. He just makes me prouder and prouder every single time the sun rises.
“Baby?” I knocked the door. “Come in, nena.” He put the script aside and asked me to come closer and sit on his lap. “Can I talk to you?” I asked and I felt like he already knew that I was about to say something serious. “Sure. Is everything okay?” I shook my head.
He told me to stand up so I could sit on his chair while he knelled in front of me. “You know I will support you whatever decision you take, right? You can always tell me anything that is going on inside this mind.” He said while putting a strand of hair behind my ear.
I sighed and started telling everything. He didn’t say a word the whole time and I was thankful for that. I told him the whole plan, what was going to happen and how we should act. I started shaking and I knew anxiety was taking over my body. “Breathe.” His tone of voice wasn’t that sweet anymore. Too many things were going on inside his mind and that was scaring me. Maybe he was thinking about the possibility of living me forever, for real.
He stood up and walked around the room with his hand on his head. By that time I had already stopped talking and was staring my own hands. My face was red after crying so much. I could see on his face that he was about to cry. He was always tough around me. Always trying to play the strongest one whom I should always be comfortable to lean in.
I don’t even know how many minutes had passed while the room was filled by silence. “Will…” I tried to say but he didn’t hear. He had already slammed the door and left. That was the last straw for me. I threw myself on the carpeted floor. I slapped myself until my face started hurting. I could feel it burning and I was glad. I deserved it. It was my fault. If I wasn’t a fucking singer who needs a fucking manager so much to lead a fucking career, I could live in peace with the love of my life.
It was already 10pm when I stood up and went towards my perfect bathroom to take a bath and try to clean that horrible day from my body. I took off my clothes and dropped them on the floor. I got inside the bath and let the water run through my body. I looked around and remembered every time Wilmer and I went out to look for the furniture I was crazy about. He made sure to find every single piece, some he even called friends whom knew specialized people who would be able to make exclusives pieces.
I closed my eyes trying to avoid my mind to remember all the good moments I spent with Wilmer at his house, mainly in that exactly bath I was in. After about an hour, I decided to get out. I opened Wilmer’s side of the closet and chose one of his tshirts. I put it on and went to bed. Batman jumped on it and lied next to me. “I love you, baby” I kissed his little nose and drift off to sleep.
I don’t know what time was, probably passed midnight, when I felt his arms wrapping around my body. “I’m sorry, baby.” He left a kiss on my neck and hugged me closer. “We are gonna make it work. I promise you.” I turned around and looked inside his eyes. I knew he meant it. “I fought for you once and I’ll fight for you again whenever it’s necessary. I will never leave you. Never.” He said kissing my forehead like he did every night before sleeping. “I love you, Wilmer.” I said hugging him like it was the last time I was going to do that. Actually, it was. At least, one of the last few times. “I love you, Demi.” With those last words, we closed our eyes and tried to have a good night of sleep while being together in our special embrace.
“Baby…” He wrapped his arms around my body while I finished packing for the tour. “D…” He started kissing my neck on that way just he knows how to drive me crazy in a few second. “Eduardo. Don’t. Even. Start. I’m a single lady now.” I joked putting the last piece of lingerie inside my black suitcase. “A single lady shouldn’t wear that kind of lingerie, mainly when whom gave her that one was her ex-boyfriend. She should throw it away or give it back to him as a memory of the wild nights they shared together. Don’t you think?” He took the red lingerie from my suitcase and put inside his boxers. “OMG WILMER. YOU ARE INSANE.” We both laughed and he turned around going towards the door.
“Come here, Mr. Valderrama. Give it back to me. It’s my favorite piece. You are not going to steal it from me.” I said on an angry tone, like a mother would do to a badly behaved child. “Try to catch me, mommy.” He yelled from the hall. He was definitely my big son.
It took a while until I caught him, naked, in our living room, holding my red lingerie as if I was a dog and that was my favorite bone. “Jesus, Wilmer. What did you put in your coffee today?” I asked already blushing. “I don’t know, maybe some sexy appeal.” He came towards me with lust in his eyes and I knew what was about to happen and I loved that.
“Let me hear what your body has to say…” He whispered on my ear, biting my lobe. “Wilmer…” I moaned already feeling the same emotions he made me feel every time he touched me.
I couldn’t let my eyes opened anymore. He was a bad body and wanted to make sure I knew that. When I realized my clothes were already dropped somewhere in the room, and we were both naked while many windows surrounded us. But to be honest, I wasn’t giving a fuck anymore. I didn’t care if his parents or his sisters saw us. They knew the truth and it wouldn’t be the first time they caught his son fucking his girlfriend…now not official girlfriend anymore, but forever his secret woman.
I came back to reality when my phone rang. It was Natalie. I was so glad she was back in my team. I did miss her. “The other member of our love triangle is calling. Should I ask her to join us?” I asked Wilmer and he laughed.
“Hi, Natalie.” I said. “Hm..Sorry for calling at the wrong time.” I don’t know why, but people can notice difference on my tone of voice whenever I fuck. That’s insane. “Don’t worry. We are on a break. Wanna join us? Wilmer said he would love to.” Wilmer and I laughed while she yelled. “DEMETRIA. After all these years you both are still the same. I hate you all.” “We hate you too. Fortunately, we still fuck the ones whom we hate.”
By that time, Wilmer was already bored and started playing with his fingers on my belly. He looked at me and I knew what he was going to do. “Okay, Natalie. I will pass by the office tomorrow to che…ck it.” I gave Wilmer a deadly look and that just made him be even happier to play even more.
His fingers were nowhere I could see them completely. All I could do was feeling him fingering me with three fingers. I was trying my best to calm down and keep paying attention to what Natalie was saying, but I knew I wasn’t going to last any longer. And that happened, with Natalie hearing me moaning Wilmer’s name.
“Fuck, Wilmer. Bye Natalie. I’m sorry for that.” I hanged up on her and I’m sure she was glad. I threw my phone away and let myself feel the last moment with my man before leaving.
“Never ever forget about me, Ms. Lovato.” He said looking inside my eyes. “Promise me we will facetime every night.” I nodded with tears in my eyes. “And don’t even try to find someone to fuck. You are a single lady, but my secret woman.” Even on sad moments, going through one of the worst times of our relationship he always managed to make me laugh, and I’m thankful for having in my life. Even though right now won’t be as I truly wanted.
“The same goes to you, Mr. Sexy Valderrama.” I kissed his lips and we shared a sweet and passionate kiss. It probably took longer than it should, but I didn’t care about it. People might think we broke up, that we don’t love each other anymore, but deep inside we both know no one will ever be able to tear us apart. We will fight to find each other whenever it’s necessary. “I love you.” “I love you.” “See you in a few months, nena.”
Max was waiting in the car. I got in and looked at my man through the window. He was and will forever be the love of my life. I waved at him and that was the last view of him I got during four long months.
dededos
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