middleditch and schwartz quotes that are in my head right now
jesus absolute holy fucking christ
*mumbling alien voice* wri ih o th boarh!
I was born in 1981.. fuck was my cock huge!
..... we work for the tsa
oaaghh card trick! anyway..
take the first page, fold it up like an airplane, what the fuck was that?!
revenge... vengeance....... revengeance....
you're all alone in there (and I'm just a boy) and you're just a boy!
this is just two gazelles, consenting who gets to fuck who, via a one and done rock paper scissors
you doin pants to this thing?
I'm not a flat earther, but I do think if I had slippery enough shoes I could slide allllll the way around
I don't know why don't you ask your kids
stop chanting FUCK YOU NIGEL no, stop chanting
my hair's down to my butt, I play magic the gathering, and I love my dad's lap! I'm toby! I've got a million friends!
I've got a bow tie, and a tie
I, uh, wh- uh, if, what, what does.. the sound. a- a doodie make?
don't look at me, I own a cat farm!
you are some kind of ff fuckin, d-dumbass...
I'm loose as a ca- I don't think you should ask a woman- (say it, say it loose as a c- you were about to say it, say it. say it, I've never heard the phrase before!) It's not something you ask a lady, but I am loose as a caboose~
Next Is a Visual Skills Challenge. To The Best Of Your Ability, Embody.. A Gazelle. You Have a Full Minute.
ABANDON YOUR CHILD EMILY. ABANDON YOUR BOOOYYYYY.
if that side is the groom's side and the bride's side.. oh, we're all people from the music festival
does anybody have anything mean to say?
just a quick pause. I'm still here! and I know exactly what he wants!
~I can still be the priest if you want~
Harold. HAROLD, HAROLD. HAROLD.
door open or closed? well.. nowadays.......... take a seat.
it's a short nine. (short nine?!) yeah, she's a short nine, sir.