Young Drunk Punk sentence starters part two
“You know that dream where you’re walking through high school in your underwear? I think I’m having it right now.”
“Your excitement depresses me.”
“Keep your head down, do your job, try not to have so many… Feelings.”
“Not really seeing the joke part.”
“You are here to fix the toilet, right?”
“I’m so ticked off I could spit tacks.”
“It was an accident! I was thrown off my game! There were panties in full view!”
“I got a job with the Flames.”
“This is my house. I live here.”
“See, the thing about this job is you’ve got to bury your anger deep inside, it’s called being professional.”
“I refuse to stand here and take advice from some pervert who steals a hairclip when there’s a pair of perfectly good panties staring him right in the face.”
“So anyway, a little about me: I like to have fun, I only need about an hour of sleep every three days, I like to watch a good fight, don’t mind a little blood, but I could also stay in and watch a cuddle movie.”
“I’ll ask questions with my mouth and answer them with my fists!”
“I don’t think confrontation is what’s required here.”
“You bury your anger for a reason: to keep it safe for when you want to pull it out and use it!”
“The sexiest thing a woman can wear is a fur coat with nothing underneath.”
“Is there any karate in this movie?”
“Yes, we wouldn’t want to alarm our women, would we?”
“I need to commandeer your sandwich.”
“Crazy things are happening. Blood, satanists; I don’t wanna die!”
“I like big dogs and small tops.”
“Let’s do that thing you think about when you look at me.”
“He says he saw a meteor, tripped, hit his head… Story checks out.”
“I just wanted to make a simple brilliant indictment of society. Is that too much to ask?”
“Well, that was unexpectedly powerful. I tip my hat, you talented bastard.”
“Not everything is sexual.”
“Look, there are only three things that a man can talk about with his son in order to bond. Building a deck, slaying a caribou, and admiring the female form.”
“Are you picturing having sex with my mom?”
“I came in through the window but I can’t tell you which one cuz then you’d fix it.”
“Stretch and find your chi.”
“I have to warn you, though, I’ve got a pretty good stroke. I’ll go easy on you, though; I’ll only use one hand.”
“Don’t you worry, I’ll show you a few moves. But I think we both know who’s gonna end up on top.”
“I’m tired of being treated like a sex object just because I’m sexy.”
“See, you’re finally starting to understand us women.”
“Sir. I am both flattered and indignant.”
“Maybe I just think that porn isn’t a team sport.”
“She’s got a good point, I just wish she was bendin’ over when she made it.”
“I hope you didn’t wash your eyes today because you’re about to see somethin’ dirty.”
“I like you but I’m starting to think we’re jinxed.”
“The funeral’s Saturday. Better not have any plans.”
“Everyone deals with grief in their own ways.”
“Religion can’t help you, but scotch can.”
“You’re not totally naked, you’re wearing an oven mitt.”
“Funerals are the ultimate turn-on for girls. They’re practically a panty-peeler.”
“I don’t know if I can do this. Maybe I’m not as strong as everyone thinks I am.”
“I have to say, you’re actually quite sexy when you’re emotionally vulnerable.”
“Let’s face it, all anyone remembers of that party is you standing on your tippy-toes, full-on kissing a man.”
“You only see her horrible side. I get to see her good side. The side where she takes all her clothes off.”
“Sounds a lot better than that guy who tried to undo your bra with his feet.”
“Psh, yeah, like we could afford a unicorn.”
“Is it supposed to be this color?”