JJ

❤️‍🔥𝘿𝙤𝙣’𝙩 𝙇𝙚𝙩 𝙈𝙚 𝙂𝙚𝙩 𝙈𝙚❤️‍🔥

[bl0w-m3]

Hello loves🤍

⚠️❤️‍🩹𝚃𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚋𝚕𝚘𝚐 𝚒𝚜 𝚊 𝚕𝚘𝚝 𝚘𝚏 𝚏𝚞𝚗, 𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝚊𝚕𝚜𝚘 𝚛𝚎𝚕𝚊𝚝𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚘 𝚖𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚊𝚕 𝚒𝚕𝚕𝚗𝚎𝚜𝚜 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚝𝚛𝚊𝚞𝚖𝚊 𝚜𝚘 𝚙𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚜𝚎 𝙳𝙽𝙸 𝚒𝚏 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚝𝚛𝚒𝚐𝚐𝚎𝚛𝚎𝚍 𝚋𝚢 𝚜𝚞𝚋𝚓𝚎𝚌𝚝𝚜 𝚜𝚞𝚌𝚑 𝚊𝚜 𝚊𝚋𝚞𝚜𝚎, 𝙴𝚍’𝚜, 𝚝𝚛𝚞𝚊𝚖𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚌 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚜, 𝚎𝚝𝚌❤️‍🩹⚠️

𝙿𝙻𝙴𝙰𝚂𝙴 𝙽𝙾 𝙼𝙸𝙽𝙾𝚁𝚂 🔞

✨𝓟𝓻𝓸-𝓻𝓮𝓬𝓸𝓿𝓮𝓻𝔂, 𝓹𝓻𝓸 𝓱𝓪𝓻𝓶-𝓻𝓮𝓭𝓾𝓬𝓽𝓲𝓸𝓷, 𝓹𝓻𝓸- 𝓹𝓵𝓪𝓷𝓽 𝓶𝓮𝓭𝓲𝓬𝓲𝓷𝓮✨

BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) - PTSD - OCD - “Unspecified” Eating Disorder - Depersonalization/Derealization . (Quite the list I know, I’m not happy about it either)

𝚃𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚒𝚜 𝚊 𝚙𝚕𝚊𝚌𝚎 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚢𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚏𝚛𝚘𝚖 𝚟𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐, 𝚝𝚘 𝚎𝚍𝚞𝚌𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗, 𝚝𝚘 𝚓𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝚙𝚕𝚊𝚒𝚗 𝚜𝚑𝚒𝚝𝚙𝚘𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐, 𝚒𝚝’𝚜 𝚊 𝚜𝚊𝚏𝚎 𝚙𝚕𝚊𝚌𝚎 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚊𝚗𝚢𝚋𝚘𝚍𝚢 𝚠𝚑𝚘 𝚏𝚎𝚎𝚕𝚜 𝚕𝚒𝚔𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚢’𝚛𝚎 𝚐𝚘𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚝𝚑𝚛𝚘𝚞𝚐𝚑 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚊𝚕𝚘𝚗𝚎.🫶🩷

✉️ 𝓜𝔂 𝓲𝓷𝓫𝓸𝔁 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓪𝓼𝓴𝓼 𝓪𝓻𝓮 𝓪𝓵𝔀𝓪𝔂𝓼 𝓸𝓹𝓮𝓷, 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓘 𝔀𝓲𝓵𝓵 𝓻𝓮𝓹𝓵𝔂 𝓽𝓸 𝓪𝓼 𝓶𝓪𝓷𝔂 𝓪𝓼 𝓘 𝓬𝓪𝓷!🩵

𝙰 𝙻𝚒𝚝𝚝𝚕𝚎 𝙰𝚋𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝙼𝚎:

𝙸’𝚖 22 𝚢𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚜 𝚘𝚕𝚍 ♐️

𝙿𝚛𝚘𝚗𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚜: 𝚂𝚑𝚎/𝙷𝚎𝚛

𝙱𝚒𝚜𝚎𝚡𝚞𝚊𝚕 🏳️‍🌈

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[bl0w-m3]

Does the impending sense of doom and headache mean I’m having a STROKE or does it mean I have health OCD and chronic migraines 🥲

[bl0w-m3]

Does anybody else have this mysterious medical condition? Pleading for help at this point.

I’m female (Afab), 22 years old, 5’5 about 150 lbs. I currently do not take any medication except occasional Zolfrain and IV reglin at hospitals.

I have a medical condition that has stunted doctors for 8 years now.

I was in highschool, 15 years old. One day I walked into school, threw up in home room, and never stopped. I throw up every day, multiple times a day, for seemingly no reason. There’s times it gets so bad I wind up in the hospital because I can’t keep food, water or medications down. They have to give me IV medication to stop it, and it works for maybe 3 days max before the cycle begins again.

I’ve been to GI’s in 4 different states, hospitals in 3 different states with no answers. They’ve done every test they could think of, with scopes and nuclear tests finding nothing at all except irritation caused by vomiting.

They try to tell me it’s anxiety, but it happens when I’m not anxious and I even wake up out of a dead sleep to puke multiple times a night!

I got a medical card at 17 for the condition. Since then, every medical professional has tried to blame the vomiting on CHS. Even when I tell them the condition started years before I ever touched marijuana. And that occasional marijuana use is the only way I can eat at all. At that point they tell me “well we have no answers, go see another GI”

It affects my quality of life. I’m sick all the time. Every couple of months I have break downs cause I simply do not want to be sick anymore, and I feel like I’ve exhausted every avenue with NO ANSWERS.

[bl0w-m3]

In the worst pain of my entire life tonight.

Breaking down just begging somebody to hold my hand.

Nobody could be bothered.

Time to keep things to my damn self and deal with it alone.

[undergroundwubwubmaster]

✨️ Twinkle twinkle little star, how the hell you draw an arm ✨️

[bl0w-m3]

You can be doing everything right and still have the rug pulled right from under you…..

[bl0w-m3]

Succeeding at my dream job.

Loving my hobbies.

Having a life.

Supporting myself.

Quit drinking.

Finally happy.

Just for something completely out of my control (getting hit by a drunk driver) to rip all of it away.

[bl0w-m3]

You can be doing everything right and still have the rug pulled right from under you…..

[bl0w-m3]

Hit me so hard when I came to the realization that most people are just not good.

I grew up in shit. I grew up with abuse. But I still always had in my head that people were good.

That they had good intentions

That they cared for others.

That doing something GOOD for somebody besides themselves was second nature.

It’s not fucking true. Most people could not give a shit about anybody but themselves.

[bl0w-m3]

Doing something good for another person is rewarding to me.

Going out of my way to show somebody I care about them is rewarding to me.

Helping a stranger when it’s out of my way just because is rewarding to me.

Realized recently most people just don’t feel that way. That they couldn’t care less. That they lose no sleep at night over anybody or anything.

[bl0w-m3]

Hit me so hard when I came to the realization that most people are just not good.

I grew up in shit. I grew up with abuse. But I still always had in my head that people were good.

That they had good intentions

That they cared for others.

That doing something GOOD for somebody besides themselves was second nature.

It’s not fucking true. Most people could not give a shit about anybody but themselves.

[bl0w-m3]

[bl0w-m3]

God I haven’t posted on here in like two years but I’m back in the headspace of 20 years old me stuck in the house feeling like she’s dying.

I moved on and did well. I have my dream job. Amazing boyfriend and friends and hobbies I love.

Then got hit on the highway. By a drunk driver. Who I actually know well.

And it starts all over again.

[bl0w-m3]

“You used to not give a fuck”

No YOU thought I didn’t give a fuck. I was dying inside. I can’t keep it in anymore. It’s hurts too much.

[bl0w-m3]

[bl0w-m3]

This heartbreak gonna make me skinnyyyy (it hurts so bad I can’t eat)

[bl0w-m3]

“It’s because mercurys in retrograde” bro what just happened changed me on a molecular level please shut the fuck up

[bl0w-m3]

Letting go of people who serve no purpose in your life is honestly an amazing feeling.

It still hurts like a bitch, but when you don’t degrade yourself with settling for bad behavior, you heal a lot faster.

[bl0w-m3]

I hate who I am when I’m in love.