thank you for being thirty so I can remind myself I can make it too
its one of the hardest things I do and its tough as fuck and some days the world gets worse, everything is collapsing in on itself and I think damn this isn't worth it. but then other days my girlfriend will smile at me and melt my heart, the warmth of the sun will touch my skin and instantly make me feel energized and alive, my favorite fruit seltzer will be in the fridge for me to drink and I'll eat 10 pickle spears because thats lunch if I want it to be. The thrift store will have something that reminds me of my grandma, a woman with huge breasts will lean over and show her massive cleavage and leave me thinking about how amazing and diverse the human body can be, someone will compliment my hair color, some food I ordered will be so bad that I can't help but laugh and my friend will show me a drawing so incredible I'll be at a loss for words and can only reply in emojis.
Those moments can be far apart with a lot of my worst days in-between but eventually they come, they stick with me, I hold onto them like the precious moments they are to remind me that living is more than surviving day to day its about feeling, however small, some kind of connection to someone, something, anything. And just like that... I'm 31 years old. I made it again. One more time.
