blow to the temple

Queen Bitch. Don't forget it. Selena Blair. Witch. 20. PR. Your ruler.

[blairwitch-selena]

JOHN BOYEGA IS SO BEAUTIFUL AND I AM SO FRAGILE 

[blairwitch-selena]

danny-mcr:

Easy there, spitfire. Take a breath or two before you start tearing down what’s left of my self-esteem with your confusing compliments and non-compliments.

I was just messing with you, Selena. Wear whatever you want. I always look forward to having your express permission to look at your ass and all other associated body parts. And to answer your feigned insult slash question, I’m good for plenty. Breakfast especially. Oh! And you should see how far I can throw a football now. And no one said I was a good person.  

… Do you want a hug?

You’re so sweet. It’d disgust me if it weren’t for your slightly above average looks.

Stupid. I’ve unassociated myself with you. But I guess I just love coming back to the things that are not good for me. So yes, I would love a hug. But we both have to be naked for it.

[blairwitch-selena]

nympho-nathan:

Honestly, I really don’t think you want me commenting on any of that, and, since I’m a gentleman, I’ll refrain.

Your opinion really doesn’t mean anything to me, especially since you’ll stick your dick in just about anything, ass and tits of no matter.

But, no, Nathan, why don’t you tell us how you really feel? I haven’t been properly annoyed in the last couple of days, and I miss it a bit.

[blairwitch-selena]

irish-ivy:

Maybe you could just be careful then? I mean, if you really want to work out. Frankly, I don’t think you need it.

Oh, Ivy. You always know the right way to not really say anything at all or have an opinion. 

I’m joking. Thank you. It’s always nice hearing I’m not a fat cow from someone as skinny and gorgeous as you.

[blairwitch-selena]

dexter-harrison:

Now if it isn’t my favorite boy. I’ll pose for a picture if it makes it more convenient for your staring.

What’s your opinion on the ass and boobs issue? I’m sure you have something to say about it, with the way you're making sex eyes at me. Not that I'm complaining, I quite like it.

[blairwitch-selena]

danny-mcr:

Selena, please. I wear a tie now. I work in the presence of… Well, kinda kids, almost adults. But really, when do Jackal’s player ever really grow up? But I did sub one actual real life class so…

You look awesome as always but think of the children.

What, just cause you wear ties means you can’t look at my big ass? What the hell, Danny? What are you even good for?

Fine, I’ll start wearing longer skirts and higher cut tops. But just because you look oh so cute when you’re trying to be the good person everyone knows you aren’t.

[blairwitch-selena]

fairchildestof-them-all:

S, if the Bible is telling you it’s a no-go then you must listen. It’s rule number one. Right up there with pro-hair care. Besides, how else will all of Drake’s songs be about you?

It’s confirmed. You are the Hot Girl.

Ugh, right? I know I should just listen to Cosmo. And I am Drake’s future baby momma, so what can I do? Gotta keep this cake up or else daddy Drake won’t love me.

Obviously. I’m the most important person in this stupid town. I swear, Char, I’m so done with these small town boys and their tiny dicks. I need the big city again. I say you, me, and Ivy all get super slutty and hook up with guys that look like our ex boyfriends.

[blairwitch-selena]

ladythea-agentfariel:

I don’t think you should worry about your body at all unless your treating it badly. You’re a gorgeous young woman and if anyone says differently you should take that as jealousy and pay no mind.

Well, obviously I’m hot. I mean, look at me. There’s no way I couldn’t be hot.

Ugh, but thanks, I guess. My therapist says I should start being more sincere, but so far it’s been shitty. You’re welcome to check out my ass as much as you want, it’ll stay fat for a long time.

[blairwitch-selena]

I was going to start eating less and working out more but I read in Cosmo that if I’m not careful my ass will get skinnier and my boobs will shrink.

I like having a fat ass and big tits. It’s the best, right?

[fairchildestof-them-all]

A Charlene & Selena Moodboard: 1/?

“Okay, this is only going to happen one time in your entire life so treasure it. Right now we’re going to pretend my problems aren’t as important as yours, even though they obviously are way more important, and we’re going to talk about what’s wrong with you. Char, talk to me. Seriously.”

“That’s actually possibly one of the sweetest things you’ve ever said to me.”

@blairwitch-selena

[blairwitch-selena]

hey u nerds

[blairwitch-selena]

babes

[johnwithaspark]

Where's my 1989 CD?

[johnwithaspark]

What- I… of course. I mean. You know. You’re pretty, I mean. Of course. 

Look at you. You’re beautiful. But you’re too young for me. That’s what I’m getting at here! You’re my sister’s age, basically!

[blairwitch-selena]

We're living in a modern age, John.

I've been with men twice my age before. Ten years isn't a lot. And you're assuming quite a bit from a single conversation, aren't you?

[johnwithaspark]

Where's my 1989 CD?

[johnwithaspark]

20. Okay. That’s an acceptable age.

Which is by far the creepiest thing I’ve ever had the misfortune to say. I’m 30. Ten years there. Age gap, you know. Probably a good idea for me to stop talking and for you to stop being so… pretty. 

[blairwitch-selena]

You think I'm pretty?

[dr-obedientprince]

Hey, it’s still a nice desk. Yeah, dental work. Maybe you should stop by for a check up some time. Unless you still dislike seeing dentists? -smirks slightly- Well thank you. Yours are rather lovely too.

I’m sure I will. What would you like to know? I’m a dentist, I’m new to town, I have two kids, and my recent divorce is still all over the papers. Don’t think there’s much else to tell.

[blairwitch-selena]

Only if I get to see your desk and decide for myself whether it's porn worthy or not. [grins] I know, but thank you.

... Two kids. Two kids. Two. [restraining from fanning self] – I'm so sorry to hear about your divorce. But welcome to Havensdale. What are your childrens' names? 

[blairwitch-selena]

Divorcee with two kids.

God is real. 

[johnwithaspark]

Where's my 1989 CD?

[johnwithaspark]

Hi. Selena. Hi. I said that like three times. Hi.

Yeah. That’s me. I own the auction house. With the auctioning. What do… you do? If you’re even old enough to have a job. Which I’m sure you are! And this is coming out all in a jumble. 

[blairwitch-selena]

Don't worry. I think it's cute.

I'm 20, if you're wondering. Completely legal. I'm a PR agent. I've just moved home from New York, actually. Havensdale is quite a place.