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secret organizations for studying paranormal phenomena are always calling the creatures they find like "specimen 58008" or some fake latin taxonomy or something vague and ominous like "the red angel" or whatever and thats all well and good but i want a story about a bunch of cryptozoologists going around naming things the way people name like actual birds and lizards and shit.

i want to get lost in the woods and meet the ring-tailed tree creeper and roger's false elk. i want a character who is desperate to prove this monster is actually a distinct species from that very similar looking monster so they can name it after themself. i want two field researchers narrowly escaping an encounter with some ten foot tall thing made of carnivorous vines and one of them is like wow wait til the guys back at the lab hear we got that close to a lesser thorn-backed bone eater 🙂 and the other scientist is like.,...... 😰lesser?

dateamonster

thank you for appreciating my boobs calculator joke but the real overlooked gem of this post is rogers false elk. basically this entire post was just an excuse to come up with a hypothetical monster called rogers false elk. its just so pleasing to me. does nobody care him? does nobody but me care for rogers false elk?

mamoru

🇺🇸 recall of alfalfa sprouts simultaneously contaminated with (at least) 3x shiga toxin-producing e. coli & 1x antibiotic-resistant salmonella combo; outbreak declared 🇺🇸

everything sprouts LLC sold these sprouts to grocery stores, restaurants, and possibly other food service outlets in minnesota and wisconsin. but they also sold to wholesale distributors, and those wholesale distributors likely sold it in other states (and possibly the entire country to some degree) given there have been 15 states with illnesses linked to this outbreak as of august 8. it takes 3-4 weeks for reported illnesses to get added to an outbreak, and it apparently took until after the FDA publicly named everything sprouts as a source of this outbreak on august 21 for them to agree to issue a recall.

everything sprouts alfalfa sprouts have been contaminated since at least may 2026.

...but, is anything manufactured by everything sprouts manufactured safely? just how badly did everything sprouts half-ass their food safety, FDA inspections, and then this recall? what did the FDA find when they inspected everything sprouts? are there other possible health risks in eating alfalfa sprouts? join me (rune) on a journey of red flags, public data, and what you can do next to make a difference instead of feeling powerless.

as always, you can find the recalled products and batches at the very bottom, however...

longest story short: regardless of what specific products and batches are getting recalled, you might want to avoid all everything sprouts products. even the FDA says their facilities are absolutely fucking disgusting.

I (rune!) call this one the quadruple sproutbreak.

click the links to get this information directly and with less commentary. and please do, because between the FDA, FDA enforcement reports, USDA FSIS, CPSC and more, there have been hundreds of recalls in the US in the past month. I (rune!!) post about fewer than 1% of all recalls in the united states. (bonus links: reports of unsafe products, and how to report a problem with food)

🇺🇸FDA outbreak investigation link | CDC outbreak investigation link🇺🇸

Everything Sprouts, LLC, based in Minneapolis, MN is recalling certain lots of Alfalfa Sprouts because it has the potential to be contaminat

recall announced august 22, 2026

Everything Sprouts, LLC, based in Minneapolis, MN is recalling certain lots of Alfalfa Sprouts because it has the potential to be contaminated with Shiga toxin producing Escherichia coli (STEC) or Salmonella bacteria. Shiga toxin-producing Escherichia coli (STEC) are organisms that can cause serious and sometimes fatal infections in young children, elderly people, and others with weakened immune systems. Escherichia coli (STEC) O26:H11, E. coli O103:H25, and E. coli O168:H8 are three members of this group of Shiga toxin-producing E. coli. STECs cause an acute diarrheal illness (often bloody diarrhea) within a few days of ingestion of the bacteria. Most people recover within a week. However, a subset of infected individuals (especially children < 5 years of age, the elderly, and immunocompromised individuals) may develop hemolytic uremic syndrome (HUS), a severe illness characterized by hemolytic anemia (red cell breakdown), thrombocytopenia (low platelet count) and renal failure. HUS can lead to death. The most common clinical illness caused by nontyphoidal Salmonella infection is gastroenteritis, resulting in nausea, vomiting, and abdominal cramps, which typically begins 6–72 hours after ingestion of contaminated food or water. Salmonella gastroenteritis is usually a self-limited disease in the normal healthy individual. Patients at risk for more severe illness include neonates, infants, adults greater than 65 years, patients with impaired immunity or immunosuppressing treatments. In these rare circumstances, infection with Salmonella can result in the organism getting into the bloodstream and producing more severe illnesses such as arterial infections (i.e., infected aneurysms), endocarditis and septic arthritis.

first up, nowhere does everything sprouts say this was a "voluntary" recall. not that every recall lists when it is voluntary, but this is worth noting in this particular case because according to the FDA outbreak investigation timeline, everything sprouts initially refused to issue a recall until they were publicly shamed for their quadruple shitful sproutbreak. everything sprouts was notified that their products were implicated at least by august 19, when the FDA showed up in person to investigate. the FDA does not always publicly name the manufacturer(s) responsible for any given outbreak. everything sprouts might have been gambling on the possibility they could get away with this, just like they apparently got away with unsafe food manufacturing practices after receiving a warning letter from the FDA for being absolutely fucking disgusting. more on their warning letter in a bit.

elephant in the room: contamination with at least 3 shiga toxin-producing e. coli strains and 1 salmonella strain at once here. at this rate there might be other contaminants, because an outbreak linked to 4 fucking named pathogenic contaminants at once is actually pretty impressive. truly some of the worst anyone has ever done it. and by it I (rune!!!) mean, heh, Sprout

these strains of e. coli are likely to give you bloody diarrhea, kidney failure, other forms of lifelong disability, or possibly a heaping serving of death. shiga toxins are really unfun to hang out with.

this strain of salmonella is antibiotic resistant, but not to antibiotics commonly used to treat salmonella infections, and salmonella infections rarely need to be treated with antibiotics. salmonella infection can also cause lifelong disability or death, but less likely than e. coli.

e. coli and salmonella can be spread to other people and pets through tiny particles of shit or vomit. if you get sick, make sure you keep your hands thoroughly washed and your bathroom clean to reduce the chance of your infectious bodily fluids making someone else sick.

and make sure you seek out medical care so your illness can be officially diagnosed and counted, if at all possible! thanks for helping keep others safe!

The recalled product was distributed by Everything Sprouts from May 27, 2026 to August 21, 2026 to wholesale distributors and to grocery stores located in MN and WI.

everything sprouts alfalfa sprouts have been contaminated since at least may of this year. this seems like a remarkable understatement given the findings of the FDA inspections between 2018 and 2024, but this outbreak investigation is still ongoing. the fault of these specific contaminants could theoretically entirely be the fault of the seed supplier, but that does not excuse everything sprouts of their numerous food safety violations. so how about a pivot to those inspections really quick?

on march 28, 2025, everything sprouts received a warning letter from the FDA with the listed reason of "CGMP/Food/Prepared, Packed or Held Under Insanitary Conditions/Adulterated". CGMP stands for current good manufacturing processes. the warning letter is an illuminating read, but here are just a few key points about how everything sprouts manufactures their food:

water leaks from the damaged roof, through the ceiling, and onto mung been sprouts and 'clean' employee smocks.

condensate from machinery drips near 'finished' mung brean sprouts. this issue was also noted in 2018 and 2023 FDA inspections. this particular inspection was from 2024.

when the FDA inspectors asked how they intend to fix the leaky roof, everything sprouts said they rent and their landlord only agreed to fix the roof as part of a long-term project with no estimated date of completion. sorryyyyy landlord said no :(

the FDA said everything sprouts is required to manufacture food safely and that their corrective actions would be evaluated during the FDA's next inspection. does anyone think maybe they never fixed it

condensate from machines dripped onto mung bean sprouts

irrigation systems covered in "black organic matter" were used to grow soy sprouts

plastic sheets enclosing soy sprout growing cabins were ripped and covered in "white build-up"

"Our investigator noted attempts to improperly repair these concerns with tape, with sprouts adhered to tape in multiple locations throughout the facility." everything sprouts could not even keep TAPE clean while half-assing their repairs

visibly soiled strip curtains touched the mung bean sprouts

chunks of paint and soil fell onto the conveyor belts that directly handled the mung bean sprouts

"...incomplete repairs to gaps and other structural deficiencies within food contact surfaces may create harborage points for pathogens and make it increasingly difficult to properly sanitize the surface. We will evaluate the adequacy of your corrective actions at our next inspection."

yeah shit I (rune!!!!) really hope the FDA manages to get everything sprouts to fix their hazardous, broken, difficult-to-clean food manufacturing facilities before someone gets sick. from the pathogens

so this recall is of alfalfa sprouts. you may notice that alfalfa sprouts were not mentioned in the FDA inspection, but mung bean sprouts, soy sprouts, and the entire facility WERE implicated in the inspection. this is part of why the FDA states in the outbreak that more than just everything sprouts alfalfa sprouts might be contaminated.

to me (rune!!!!!) the important part of this post is not whether or not you have a recalled batch. the important part is that everything sprouts has a history of manufacturing all of their food with the same food safety mindset that waters soy sprouts with moldy hoses.

sprouts as a whole are considered a high-risk food in the united states. between 1996 and july 2016, sprouts were associated with 46 different foodborne illness outbreaks. this includes (but is not limited to!) sprouts of alfalfa, allium, mung bean, broccoli, clover, radish, radish, mixed sprouts, single sprouts, sprouted grains, sprouted nuts, and sprouted seeds. part of this is because most sprouts are eaten raw or not cooked enough to kill off most relevant pathogens. cooking sprouts too much can make them lose their crunch, you know?

so you might be thinking, okay, what about home-grown alfalfa sprouts? are those safe?

unfortunately, the seeds can also be contaminated. a kill step can help reduce possible pathogens in seeds for those interested in sprouting at home. make sure to keep your sprouting setup clean, and to handle it with clean hands!

contamination aside, large quantities of alfalfa and mung bean sprouts (among others) and supplements containing them are also associated with development and worsening of autoimmune symptoms±disease in humans due to an amino acid called L-canavanine found in many legumes. L-canavanine toxicity contributed to the real-life death of christopher mccandless (subject of book and film into the wild) after he apparently ate hedysarum alpinum seeds.

if autoimmune or inflammation-related symptoms are a concern, it might not be the best idea to eat sprouts containing L-canavanine by the fucking pound like a certain author of a certain tumblr post about a certain alfalfa sprout quadruple sproutbreak before learning about all those autoimmune dangers fairly recently. more like aut-OW-immunity, am I (rune!!!!!!) right folks?

they should invent delicious sprouts with the L-canavanine removed. anyway back to the outbreak and how everything sprouts handles food safety.

everything sprouts did put a banner on their website warning people of the recall. except, for days, the press release linked in the banner (PDF link that might be broken by the time you click on it) included the following and many more fun little oddities:

title: "[Everything Sprouts, LLC Letterhead]"

"no reports of illnesses"

after talking about alfalfa sprouts, saying only lot #666666 of "snackies food treats" with an expiration date of 12/12/99 are being recalled

press release credited to sam smith at 555-555-5555

anyone concerned about the recall should contact XYZ inc at 123 smith lane in anywhere, MS by calling 1-800-XXX-XXXX

...the PDF everything sprouts linked in their banner was, essentially, a combination of a half-assed, self-contradicting, frequently false alfalfa sprout recall announcement with a sample recall of something completely different attached to it. really really funny that the everything sprouts sample recall batch number is #666666 considering the contents of that FDA warning letter.

everything sprouts now links to a press release PDF with "FINAL" in the URL and actual real details. phew! good thing nobody saw that blunder!

🇺🇸FDA outbreak investigation link | CDC outbreak investigation link🇺🇸

the CDC outbreak investigation link currently includes a link titled "the about salmonella infection page" which has, for days, linked to a page not found. the CDC linked to salmonella/general/index.html when they presumably meant to link to /salmonella/about, which actually contains information. you can find the CDC's real page about salmonella infection here.

luckily, the FDA outbreak investigation has most of the most relevant details anyway.

August 21, 2026 The FDA and CDC, in collaboration with state and local partners, are investigating illnesses in a multistate outbreak of Shiga toxin-producing E. coli (multiple serotypes include: O26:H11, O103:H25, O168:H8) and Salmonella Agona infections.

the "include" here is really interesting, possibly implying more than 4 disease-causing pathogens in everything sprouts products. remember the mystery black organic matter? the mystery white build up? the ceiling juice

Based on epidemiological information collected by CDC and state partners, a total of 55 people infected with multiple strains of Shiga toxin-producing E. coli and one strain of Salmonella have been reported from 15 states. Some people were infected with more than one outbreak strain. Forty-six people were infected with E. coli , 7 people were infected with Salmonella, and 2 people were infected with both Salmonella and E. coli. Illnesses started on dates ranging from May 31, 2026, to August 8, 2026. State and local public health officials are interviewing people about the foods they ate in the week before they got sick. Of the 34 people interviewed, 26 (76%) reported eating alfalfa sprouts. There have been 4 hospitalizations, and no deaths have been reported.

55 linked illnesses, 4 linked hospitalizations, and 0 linked deaths so far. but, keep in mind, the latest linked illness is from august 8. someone who heroically reports their illness today might not see their case counted until mid-late september. it is normal for a heroically reported foodborne illness outbreak-related illness to take a month to show up on its associated outbreak.

for every one linked case of foodborne illness, at least dozens of other people are thought to be sick, because most people do not go to the doctor for The Shits. everything sprouts has likely sickened hundreds to thousands of people, and (speculation but look at their fucking FDA inspection) has possibly already killed someone. and undoubtedly, some of the people sickened by this outbreak are going to be affected by it for the rest of their life.

This investigation is ongoing to determine the source of contamination and whether additional products or firms are linked to illnesses.

there might be other sprout manufacturers selling contaminated sprouts, such as through a contaminated seed supplier, or other everything sprout products contaminated nasty style. even if the e. coli and salmonella were somehow solely the fault of a seed supplier, with an FDA warning letter like that...yikes!

FDA is working with Everything Sprouts and has recommended they conduct a recall. Consumers and retailers should not eat, serve, or sell alfalfa sprouts sold under the Calco and Everything Sprouts brands.

these are, again, from before everything sprouts was willing to issue their recall. hey they kind of sound like they suck

this part of an outbreak is where a lot of people have a very dangerous misunderstanding: the 55 linked illness cases were from 15 states. those 15 states do NOT represent where contaminated alfalfa sprouts were actually sold, they represent where heroes reported their illnesses prior to august 8 2026 and then got officially counted in these investigations.

those 15 states are more than the 2 states of minnesota and wisconsin that the FDA and CDC have been able to confirm so far. everything sprouts either does not keep comprehensive records of where their products wind up, OR they have a distribution list and refuse to share. the FDA has also stated that they confirmed sale to at least a few specific grocery stores and restaurants, and the FDA has kept those a secret as well.

the majority of cases are in minnesota and wisconsin, but there have also been confirmed illnesses in: florida, indiana, iowa, kansas, michigan, new hampshire, new york, north carolina, north dakota, pennsylvania, south carolina, south dakota, and washington. since this is an outbreak, the number of linked illnesses is likely to get higher, especially as more people realize that everything sprouts got them sick. it can take up to a month for a correctly reported illness to get linked to an outbreak.

the FDA and CDC investigations will be updated as time goes on, and recalls associated with this outbreak might expand to other everything sprouts products and other sprout sellers.

one more quick detour to keep the recalled products easier to find at the very bottom of this post: your actions after reading about food recalls are up to you. you are not powerless to do anything about food safety regardless of where you are in the world. you are reading the efforts of someone who became disabled as a result of food poisoning trying to do something about food safety. in this case, spreading the word to help protect others from foodborne illness.

...and it gets very difficult reading notes from so many people debilitated by their despair in the face of recalls that they discuss not wanting to eat or sometimes even live anymore.

to reiterate a point made earlier, there have been hundreds of recalls in the united states in the past month. that might seem absolutely fucking catastrophic, but there were also hundreds of recalls in the same time frame ten years ago. unless you seek out recall information on purpose through official sources, you will ALWAYS miss a shitload of recalls.

you are allowed to read about things and be sad or enraged. you are allowed to want to do something. you are allowed to actually do something. take the official, qualified links in this post and share them with people you know. work with others on advocating for better food and product safety. contact your representatives. vote for representatives that believe in keeping people safe. help teach people in your community about safe food handling, how to report unsafe food, how to report unsafe products, and how to navigate safety alerts and recalls. so much of this stuff is publicly accessible and fairly easy to navigate once you get the hang of it.

the few recalls that make it to the news or onto social media are such a tiny fraction of regulatory activities in the united states right now. not every recall affects every person, so one big important thing you can do is sort through those recalls and send relevant ones to people you know.

the FDA publicly posts warning letters about failed inspections and unsafe practices. these warning letters can precede possible recalls.

many non-food products wind up with dozens or hundreds of fully public reports on saferproducts.gov before they wind up getting recalled, and they are all easily readable for free. it can take years after products injure or kill people for them to be recalled.

you can read through FDA warning letters or saferproducts reports and help apply pressure to companies to fix their dangerous shit by sending those reports to your local media or spreading them around local community groups. I (rune!!!!!!!) would rather these specific tumblr posts be kept to tumblr due to not actually being any kind of qualified safety expert, but you can do whatever you want with these official links and information.

you at least have an internet connection, and what you do with it is up to you. please consider turning feelings of despair into actions. the past might not be changeable, but the future absolutely fucking is.

alright. bottom of the post. back to the recall announcement, the specific products being recalled, and what to do next.

The Everything Sprouts and Calco branded Alfalfa Sprouts are packaged in individual 5oz plastic containers bearing the following bar codes: 860014523113, 860014523120 and 850079470149. The Alfalfa Sprout products subject to this recall include Alfalfa 6/5oz, Alfalfa 12/6/5oz packages with the following lot numbers: LOT #222, 223, 225, 226, 230. These same Alfalfa sprouts were also used in Everything Sprouts Crunchy Protein Sprout Mix 5oz cups, LOT# 222, 223, 226, 230 and the Zesty Garlic Mix cups, LOT# 222, 223, 225, 226, and 230.

...but again, maybe just...not eat everything sprouts anything to be safe. seriously

Consumers who believe they may have received affected lots of the Alfalfa Sprouts should immediately dispose of them and should carefully clean and sanitize any surfaces or containers that the product may have touched.

regardless of recall status, previous FDA inspections revealed that the packages of everything sprouts products are also generally contaminated, so really do make sure you clean and sanitize anything they could have touched. that means soap, water, and possibly things like bleach in fridges, freezers, cutting boards, countertops, whatever is relevant here. have you heard of hypochlorous acid? fantastic stuff.

wherever you are in the world and whatever safety posts may or may not be relevant to you, it can sometimes be comforting to wallow in resignation, because the amount of needless preventable suffering can feel so fucking overwhelming and innate.

but if there was truly no way for random tumblr users to help protect others from safety issues, and all of us were truly fully powerless, then you never would have found this post to begin with. your internet connection is power.

never forget that.

thanks for reading about the quadruple sproutbreak, stay safe, and take care!

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