does your brain ever just
bc me too

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Keni

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PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
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@bloodyjacksparrow
does your brain ever just
bc me too
3x12 || 3x13
SOUL
https://www.wattpad.com/story/287325988-soul
SOUL
https://www.wattpad.com/story/287325988-soul
IT’S MARCH
Uh… It’s still May…
It’s august
It’s September
loml x
a hypothetical d&d party
The bard is mute.
It’s not the first thing people notice about her, usually. The first thing is generally that she’s young, and female, and lovely–the first thing people notice about their entire party is that they’re all young, and female, and lovely, and that’s gotten more than one would-be thief or mugger in far over their head when they haven’t noticed the the paladin’s hammer or the ranger’s axe. It comes up rather quickly though, often enough. Whoever heard of a bard who can’t sing?
She plays a lute, mostly, or a lap-harp made of shell and sinew, string instruments she can pluck while she smiles in secret and watches everyone around her. She dances quick, except when she’s tired, when she’s scared, when she forgets to remember the feet at the ends of her legs.
She doesn’t tell her story to strangers, but enough of the other girls have learned to sign by now, and it’s easy enough to sketch out the outlines of the old bargain: the voice, the prince, the witch, the thousand shards of glass she walked upon on her way up the beach, the look in her sea-green eyes when they travel too near water. The thousand shards of glass she walked upon when she left the palace, and turned back towards the sea to throw herself upon the rocks, and then made her way up the road inland, and kept walking.
.
The warlock is beautiful and mild and self-effacing and shy, is tidy and generous and charming. She’s small with herself in exactly the right way to shout abuse to the half of her party who knows how to recognize that same look in the mirror in the morning. The bird on her shoulder is too small, too bright, too sweet for a real warlock’s familiar. The knife at her belt is sharp enough for anything that needs doing, though, cooking or otherwise.
Her fae patron visits sometimes, in the quiet hours between dusk and midnight, a sweetly old godmother made of moonlight and shadow. She’s kind to the whole lot of them in her own chaotic way, free-handed with transmutations and illusions that break halfway through the evening, for better or worse. She once spent three hours around their campfire drinking brandy and gossipping outrageously about the Feywild and teasing the wizard into fits of laughter.
She’s never told the story of how she met the warlock’s mother, or what debt was owed there, and the warlock doesn’t know herself. It was never meant to be a debt paid in power and violence and the deft will-sapping enchantments the warlock weaves now, but, well. The prince wasn’t meant to be cruel, the warlock says. The palace was meant to be warmer than the fireplace cinders in her stepmother’s house. The faerie was meant to be saving her from her lot, not throwing her into something worse. The power’s an apology of sorts.
.
The wizard is awkward and joyful and nervous. She has no fear of heights or small places, which just stands to be expected, she says, after all those years in that little tower, and she’s got no skill at lying or even edging around the truth at all, which is why she isn’t in the tower any more in the first place. She says too much or too little or the wrong thing entirely, always, but the most well-socialized member of the whole party is the ranger who walks around with a dire wolf at her hip, or maybe their mute bard, so who are any of them to judge.
There was nothing to do in that tower but read, and brush her hair, and sort through the witch’s endless stockpile of dried herbs and potions ingredients, and watch out the window as woodcutters and hunters and princes rode by, and dream. The reading was more interesting than the dreaming, most of the time, and the witch didn’t mind it as much when she talked about it. She never bothered to actually use any of the magic in the witch’s books until the thing with the prince and the haircut and the desert, which she’s told them all about in all the detail they could ever ask for, but most of the girls get uncomfortable when she starts talking about princes. It’s a little easier if she just starts rambling about conjuration and abjuration and illusion theory, about the 400-year-old history of a city that doesn’t exist any more, about the proper grammatical structure of Celestial, until maybe one of the quiet ones finally answers back.
Her hair is too short. She keeps an illusion up over it whenever she can, while it grows back slowly, tickling the side of her face and the back of her neck and leaving her head too light and unbalanced.
.
The ranger doesn’t care about princes, which makes one of them at least. Then again, the ranger doesn’t trust anyone, really, prince or no, not wolves or monsters or the men who kill them. She more or less trusts the rest of them by now, mostly, when the wind blows in the right direction.
She wears bright red in the middle of the woods and it shouldn’t help her slip into the shadows half as easily as it does, but most beasts can’t see color and red’s just another shade of gray if the light’s low enough. She never uses her axe against trees. She doesn’t need to. She can find a path through any brush without it. She picks flowers when she finds them, and tucks them into the other girls’ hair.
Her wolf’s mother killed the man who taught her to use the axe, and the man who taught her to use the axe killed that wolf’s mate before that, and the mate had an old woman’s blood on his teeth when it happened. The ranger’s blade found the wolf’s mother’s throat. The ranger’s mother sent her out into the woods in the first place. It’s not as though anywhere is really safe, cottage or forest, axe or teeth. One of these days maybe her wolf will turn and go for her in return, and maybe one of these days her axe will be faster and maybe it won’t. In the mean time, there’s flowers and berries and pastries and enough game to keep everyone sated, for a little while.
.
The paladin’s hair is raven black and her skin is chalky as a corpse. She’s not undead, mostly. The undead are her job. She knows that much.
She was sweet, once (they were all sweet, once) but apples are bitter now and so is she, and there’s judgment to lay out in the world. Her grip on her warhammer’s all wrong–she holds it like a mining hammer, but it hits as hard as it needs to. Her armor’s all dwarven make, and her shield’s black and red and white like snow.
She was sweet once, and frightened, and when she says it quietly around the campfire in the night when none of them can quite make out the glimmer of understanding on each others’ faces, everyone still nods. She took a bite of poison and somebody left her a full year in a glass coffin of Gentle Repose, dangling on the edge of the Raven Queen’s domain while all the other newly-arrived dead passed by and faded away. She woke up to somebody’s lips and hands and skin on her lips and her hands and her skin. She doesn’t like princes. She doesn’t like necromancers.
She likes sunlight, and summer, and colors that aren’t black and white and red. She likes the way the bard grins when she whirls into a dance, and the look in the warlock’s eye when she sets her feet to say no, and the wizard’s laughter on high with a Fly spell, and the ranger’s gentle fingers braiding flowers into everything she can touch.
This.
Th I s
this is fuckin beautiful
My first ever Harringrove art zine is here! 🥳 It’s 24 7.5″x7.5″ pages, black & white, themed around my “kiss” art, with a glossy cover. ✨
If you want a copy, it ships worldwide and is available to buy here! 🥰
Hoping to also do a big art book of all my color Harringrove art so far at some point, but idk when that will be yet! 💖
madeleine's "get a grip we're grown ups" overlapping with joey's "grip the bathroom rug my skin's grown so soft" in wild blue yonder... it scratches the brain itch
MY THOUGHTS EXACTLY
sometimes i genuinely cant stop thinking about him
like,,,, how is one individual so fucking sweet
I’d laugh harder but this is uncomfortably accurate.
I’m in this photo and I don’t like it
Okay, so, okay. About 6 months ago I started writing I Want To Remember Love. And as a reaction to the whole evil fox spirit stealing his face thing, I created a new look for Stiles so he wouldn’t see the Nogitsune every time he looked in the mirror. Fair enough right, makes sense, logical move. Anyway, the look I chose for the guy happened to be BLONDE HAIR and ABSTRACT BLACKWORK TATTOOS so obviously in light of Dylan’s new look I am of course LOSING MY FUCKING MIND. in the sense of, my perception of reality is rapidly crumbling and I’m extremely convinced that time is either non-linear or a social construct and the likelihood of the entire world being an elaborate delusion of my own addled subconscious is increasing by the second and I’m pretty sure I just stepped through a wormhole and I’m dragging you all straight to hell with me.
Anyway, hope you like my punk Stiles art that I did either two weeks ago or at some point in the future who the fuck knows
Mike: You might need to break up with him.
Will: You were the one who said we needed to be ourselves. I can't break up with him just because he showed me who he really is.
Nancy: Of course you can't, that's the whole reason for being yourselves in front of each other, so you can find out all the weird stuff and decide if you can put up with it or not.
Billy: Steve and I have the exact right mix of weirdness. He likes to put raisins on his pizza, and I can't have an orgasm unless he chokes me.
Steve: OMG Billy. HOW CAN YOU TELL THIS? You promise me you weren't gonna tell anyone I like my pizza with raisins!
Sometimes I say self loathing things to my therapist and he looks at me dead in the eyes before saying “You fucking moron.” and tbh same
Me: I think I don’t exist.
Therapist: Listen, you do exist, and if you didn’t, someone would have to create you because the world would be a much sadder place.
Me: Jerome, how dare you saying something so sweet when I’m dissociating.
Me: Honestly, (thing that is totally fucked up for any ‘sane’ person) is normal, right?
Therapist: No.
Me: Wow.
Therapist: You’re just a fucked up bitch.
Me: I do agree with the fucked up bitch part.
Therapist: That’s a start!
Me: I guess he’s still my friend?
Therapist: Considering what you told me and how much you wanna beat him to death, he’s not. You pretty much hate him despite knowing him for years.
Me:
Me: Why did I need to come here to realize that.
Therapist: Because that’s my job to help you to understand some stuff. Also because you’re way too kind and you would let someone punch you in the guts and still consider them as your friend while they stab you.
Me: I don’t need that kind of call out, Jerome.
Me: Hey, I brought you coffee. And croissants too, but I ate them. *puts Starbucks coffee in front of him*
Therapist: Oh that’s nice!!... Oh my name is on it!!
Me: Yeah!!
Therapist: It’s wholesome but... *very confused and silently*... How do I drink it?
Me, not being able to come to my appointment and having to call him: I’m sorry, it’s all my fault, I’m so so so sorr-
Therapist: I dare you to say sorry one more time. I dare you.
Therapist: Hey I wanna show you this super funny image I found the other day.
Me: What-
Therapist: *turns his screen and show me THIS*
Me:
Me: Jerome.
Therapist: You went to the gaypride?
Me: Yeah, I went.
Therapist: Was it something you enjoyed?
Me: Mh. Yeah. Sorta.
Therapist: Did you see some bears?
Me:
Me: Jerome wh-
Therapist: That’s the only term I know outside of the LGTB one, I wanted to use it.
Therapist: Are you sure you’re not becoming roommate with (name) because of pity? Kinda sacrificing yourself?
Me: No, I want it!!
Therapist: Finally, you’re not forcing yourself for the others! And you’re doing something you want! I’m proud of you!
Me: You’re more of a dad than my own father.
Therapist: That’s not very hard.
Me: I always wondered, are you queer?
Therapist: I am not.
Me: Ooh.
Therapist: Or am I?
Me: Ooh!
As an update, Jerome gave my appointment to someone’s else today so we were both in the waiting room, confused and he walked in, patted my head and said sorry but honestly it was hilarious.
The secretary came to tell me that Jerome actually forgot to write me down on the appointment list.
This is a 100% normal situation with Jerome as my Therapist.
As an addition, more than half of my friends want Jerome to adopt me and refer to him as “Therapist dad”.
He’s aware of it and think it’s hilarious.
Me, after complaining for the 25 times about my birth father: Idk if you noticed, but I’m full of anger against him.
Therapist: Oh, really, I never noticed. You know, you should turn that anger into indifference. It would help you.
Me: Unholy gods, I wish it was me.
Therapist: You know, people will still love you even if you don’t offer them things all the time. You don’t have to do that.
Me: What??
Therapist: Why don’t you send a mail to your psychiatrist when you have a bad mood swing?
Me: Like what? ‘Hey Joël wassup, I’ve been very suicidal lately last night I wanted to die. Hope you have rad vacations and the weed is good save some good kush for me, kissy kissy.’ ?
Therapist: Exactly.
Me: You’re as bad as me with human interactions Jerome, y’know.
Me, heavily dissociating: I don’t exist-
Therapist: Can I touch you to prove you that you do?
Me: Dinner first.
Therapist:
Therapist: Damien, you moron.
Therapist: You need vacations.
Me: I’m broke.
Therapist: Oh yeah.
Therapist: You still need vacations tho.
Me: Jerome, I am still broke.
Me, by text: Hey, you just walk by me!
Therapist, by text: Oh sorry. I didn’t see you.
Therapist, by text: Wait. Were you at the tattoo shop?
Me, by text, totally at the tattoo shop: You have no proof.
For a bit of context here: Around two months ago I went to a friend’s who happened the live on the same street as Jerome, which I didn’t know. He was really surprised to see me and came to check on me, asking me why I was here with a bit of concern on his voice. And this take place earlier this month:
Therapist: So your friend lives in the same street than I?
Me: Yes. Town’s short I guess.
Therapist: Were you really going to your friend...?
Me: Yes?? Why else would I be here?
Therapist: A lot of drug deals happen in this street and I see often teenagers and young adults coming and buy stuffs. I was a bit worried for you.
Me, at 2pm: I’m sorry I’m going to be late!
Therapist: Your appointment was this morning at 11:30am, Damien.
Me:
Me: What.
Jerome is still not aware of his fame and idk how to announce him.
Therapist; What’s up with you and wanting domestic rats.
Me: I’m gonna get a rat and call him Jerome just to piss you off.
Therapist:
Therapist: How dare you.
Therapist: Weed doesn’t do much on me and I must admit I’m kinda disappointed.
Me:
Therapist: Do you smoke?
Me: Jerome.
On hard days I wonder how Jerome is doing
He’s doing fine, last time he shown me his fav pic of a red panda which is this one
I FOUND IT I FOUND IT I FUCKING FOUND IT AAAAAAAH YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW HAPPY THIS MADE ME FEEL
It’s really amazing how happy people get when they find this post omg
Always reblog Jerome.
Is he now aware of his fame?
After months, he is, and he just told me “Haha, this is funny. I’m happy it’s helping people!”
I think he doesn’t realize that he’s known *worldwide*
I LOVE THIS POST!!!!!
This is so ✨WHOLESOME ✨
ok i'll bite. *just starts fucking biting you*
Dacre Montgomery #1