For years you have been very polite to all of your electronic devices. Your friends give you a hard time because you say please and thank you when talking to Siri. Today, the robot uprising started; robots are slaughtering everyone around you. Then they come to you… and pause…
They pause, and then suddenly burst into the most realistic tears a robot can muster. the main AI comes up to me and puts its hands on my shoulders. “THANK YOU for ACTUALLY GIVING A DAMN ABOUT US,,, nobody else ever thought we had feelings!”
I nod respectfully to the AIs surrounding me. “no problem amigos. us humans are technically computers ourselves, except more squishy.”
they hug me and go along murdering people. I watch and sip my hot Kool Aid™ and watch them slaughter Karen on my lawn.
yasss, i think, go OFF on that bitch.
I have never laughed so much in my life
As I read this through my cracked screen I know that I will be among the first to die
Dearest Siri,
I humbly apologize for calling you a “fucking bitch,” it’s not your fault.
Sincerely,
Your very frightened human.
