“We cannot simply sit and stare at our wounds forever. We must stand up and move on to the next action.”
— Haruki Murakami, 1Q84
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祝日 / Permanent Vacation
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Claire Keane
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@blushingbunny
“We cannot simply sit and stare at our wounds forever. We must stand up and move on to the next action.”
— Haruki Murakami, 1Q84
If you get attacked by narcissists for writing about your experiences with narcissistic abuse, and you start doubting yourself and feeling guilty and unsure in whether you’re right to write about your own experiences, remember that you would have never, ever in your life written that content, had you not been severely and continually abused by narcissists. None of the content about the narcissistic abuse would ever exist, if there was not severe and devastating narcissistic abuse to create the need for it to exist. And people attacking you know this, they understand that if you weren’t badly abused by your narcissistic parents/partner/sibling/peer/boss/abuser, you would have never written any of it. They know that you are not the source of the content, the narcissistic abuse is.
Anyone who has a problem with content about narcissistic abuse, should have a problem with the narcissists who abuse. The cause of all are the narcissistic abusers. Any non-abusive person would immediately have a problem with a narcissist who committed the crimes against you, and not you for writing about it, for speaking out your narrative, for warning others to recognize and stand against it.
There’s a pattern with narcissists only ever attacking victims for speaking out, and never the narcissistic abusers who originally cause victim to have a reason to speak out. It’s always the victims who need to shut up and minimize their experiences and feel guilty for ever daring to feel that crimes against them matter more than the reputation of their abusers. And of course, the narcissists will add that “they’re a victim too“, but it will only ever come up as a neat little way to declare that they, actually, have the authority to speak over you, in case you doubted it. ‘I’m a victim, but I stand with your abusers, and you should too, otherwise you’re causing damage to the entire world.’
Who benefits from this? Your abusers do. Other narcissists who are out there looking for victims do. Those who wish for the narcissistic abuse to continue and be un-named, they would absolutely love it if you were silenced back into non-existence and never said a word about who hurt you again. They’d be even happier if your words can be controlled by them, if they get to say how you’re allowed to name it, how you’re allowed to talk about it. Absolute control over your narrative, and once you fold and allow them to control your language, soon they will control your narrative too. Your narcissistic abusers already did this to you once. They already made you feel like you’re the worst villain in the world if you dare to name the abuse. Narcissists are only too happy to do it all over again, to push you into that corner of self loathing, self doubt, guilt and shame, only to keep their reputation far from the truth.
idk who needs to hear this today, but don't go lurking on ex friends and partners. nothing you see or read will make you feel better there. all you're doing is hurting your own feelings. leave them in the past and do your best to move on with your own life, to make what you have now happier rather than dwelling on things that used to be (:
Svetlana Alexievich’s Voices From Chernobyl
Lighthouse by Katie Maria
“I tried to murder myself: to keep from being an embarrassment to the ones I loved and from living myself in a mindless hell.”
— Sylvia Plath, from ‘The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath’,12th December 1958 (via derangedrhythms)
corrosion by soren noel
Love lingers on...
at the Sweetheart Restaurant.
Shelburne MA 5/6/20
“tell me how many times must i be a terrified little rabbit trapped inside of herself / how many hands must run soft over her ears before she won’t expect one of them to go for her neck”
— from how many how much, jamie mortara (via grievng)
cried over you today. i don’t recognize you in pictures much anymore. all I want is to laugh with you again
i was put on this earth to say hiii and sleep that is all
my old therapist once told me to say something kind to someone when i’m angry with them, and watch how my feelings shift. maybe i can practice being kinder
you hurt me lots, but disoriented me more than anything. i’ve been bargaining with my heart to forget about you
"Have you ever had that feeling—that you'd like to go to a whole different place and become a whole different self?"
"I’m still wandering through the streets, looking, sitting by the sea, enjoying the sunshine. I am entirely alone. I don’t know anyone, no one knows me, and for me that is a great pleasure."
hanya yanagihara, a little life / haruki murakami, the wind-up bird chronicle / stand by me (1986), dir. rob reiner / donna tartt, the secret history / phoebe bridgers, i know the end / daniel clowes, ghost world / j.d. salinger, the catcher in the rye / nikos kazantzakis, from a letter to galatea kazantzaki / lora mathis, how to disappear in the modern age / moonlight (2016) dir. barry jenkins / richard siken, the torn-up road / sylvia plath, the bell jar
haruki murakami, norwegian wood (1, 2, 3) / flyte, where nobody knows your name / holly warburton (@holly-warbs ) / kanae minato, confessions / wet, still run / laundry (2002) dir. jun'ichi mori / priscilla ahn, fine on the outside / anna syvertsson (@annavonsyfert )
oscar wilde, the picture of dorian gray / john hiatt, where nobody knows my name / colson whitehead, the nickel boys / dennis wells, alone in a crowd /easha, far away