dissociation nation

hello i am madi i am 21 and i have a lot of feelings about having bpd. personal blog: retrothot.tumblr.com

[certifiednuisance]

Me, after using every unhealthy coping mechanism I have ever had within the past 24 hours:

[simplydisposable]

That shower after that long-ass lowkey gross depressive crisis

[ojibwa]

[exhaustedborderline]

[bpdirt]

me: I WANT TO FUCKING KILL MYSELF

someone: what’s wrong??

me: oh it’s over already don’t worry lol

[bpd19]

[theirfuneral]

[bpdpeter]

me: wow this relationship is going really great

brain: destroy it

me: what

brain: destroy

[bpdjayjay]

new person: hi!

me: my personality for you will arrive in 5-7 business days once I figure out what makes you happy and how I feel around you

[writing-s-kills]

[farishtafyre]

therapist: be mindful...slow down your thoughts...be in the present..

my thoughts: 

[exhaustedborderline]

[ptsd-tiger]

internally: having a breakdown

externally:

[it-wasnt-that-bad]

[borderlinebat]

my moodswingy ass: OH MY GODDD I'M SO MOTIVATED TO DO XYZ I'M GONNA DO IT RIGHT NOW!!!!!

me: *doing xyz for approximately 4 minutes*

my moodswingy ass 2.0: lol jk

[haunt-me-x3]

hey guys wanna see a cool trick? *mood goes from 100 to 0 back to 100 in 2 seconds* haha wanna see it again?

[borderlinebat]

me: maybe i'm not actually THAT unstable?? maybe i'm just making it up??

also me: *cries for 15 minutes bc my family ate some of my food*