[avpdsideblog]

the worst thing about avpd/anxiety/paranoia is trying to recover but still having intense worries and intrusive thoughts about numerous specific things and then any time one of them actually happens that confirmation bias hits and it’s like 478373 steps backward

[headlightt]

a constant mood:

give me

attention

and validate my

feelings

please

[story-dj]

[bpdistant]

At 12 my body would go into fight or flight the second someone would change their attitude toward me. I thought everyone was unfair and unkind and were out to learn my secrets.

At 15 I swore unconditional love from another person was the thing that could heal me. I believed my anger and outlashes were something I couldn’t control, and that this was the hardest things could get.

At 17 I realized that my extreme emotions weren’t my fault, but how I chose to act when I felt them was my choice. I learned how to be confident in my choices. For the first time, I became physically and mentally self-aware. I also became afraid that everyone who cared about me was plotting to hurt me. I convinced myself that drugs were solely a window into my own mind and I could heal with this.

At almost 19, I’m alive. I know my body and mind are the only one I’ll ever have. I know I must take care of the life I was given. I know not to ignore my compulsive thoughts, but to ask them why it must be this way. I’m stuck in an addiction cycle that I want to break myself of, and yet S.A.D. is gripping at the edges of my brain. I am growing, I will always grow.

Remind yourself that things really do get easier with time, growth and an open, honest mind.

[bpdmatthewpatel]

and for this next trick I’ll go from completely loving somebody to hating their absolute fucking guts

[bpdbuttercup]

god i hate being so bored all the time but no matter what i’m doing or working on nothing can capture my interest for more than a minute and I’m wasting away and my existence is empty 

[cherryangel-bpd-blog]

crying is more fun than having sex

[fuckedupforkhahn]

Do you also sometimes realize that you are really in love with a character?

I mean, you get really really really attached, you admire every single shit about them, see them grow and develop and suddenly you notice they aren’t real and you suffer a little bit cuz you can’t go and hug them and cuddle or anything

Is it just me?

[authentic-gay]

Everyone is going through something. Stop using your differences as an excuse to have a victim’s mentality.

I’m so tired of hearing people complain about the choices they are making and the way they look and act. Instead of trying to be change or work on it, it’s feeling bad for yourself and saying you don’t deserve it. Stop saying that you’ll never be happy. Stop saying that you’ll never understand or that you’ll never accept yourself.

What’s happened has already happened. There is only moving forward and learning.

You are who you are. Work on being the person you needed, and you need.

You are not be able to do something you thought you could.

You make mistakes you thought you never would.

You change and you feel hopeless to the future.

Mourn that. Be sad. Tell yourself that it’s not fair, but life’s not fair, you have what you have, you are who you are.

You can either give up, and let it make you miserable, or you can turn that pain into power.

You won’t change for anyone but yourself. Don’t try to change for anyone but yourself.

Tell yourself that pain is only relevant if it still hurts, you will not grow unless you stop blaming the world around you for your issues, sadness and confusion.

It’s not your fault this happened to you, but it’s your duty to feel hurt, learn and grow. We will never stop pain, prejudice or hate, but you can change you, and hopefully inspire someone else to be independent.

[lagonegirl]

[permeablewound]

Borderlines-

How old were you when you had your first FP?

[opheliabpd]

Being awake? Not fun. Feeling emotions? Ugh.

[bpdistant]

me: they hurt me!! I'm gonna be distant! that'll show them!

them: hey

me: hey 💘💓💖💕💓💞💕💗💝💓💞💝💘💕💕💖💗💘💕💞💘💘💖💗💘💞💕💞💞💕💘💕💖💗💖💕💞💞💖💖💗💖💘💞💫

[repulseddoll]

👏 fuck 👏 borderline 👏 personality 👏 disorder 👏 sign 👏 me 👏 the 👏 fuck 👏 out 👏

[whitepicketchemtrails]

*gaslighting parent voice* I’m sorry if you feel hurt by anything I did to you, just know that it was never my intention to hurt you and that I love you

[bpd-hellfire]

i’m bored with myself as a person maybe i should do some drugs or crash a car or stop eating again or pick up a nice smoking habit just to keep me busy

[iconicallykitty]

me 30 mins ago: a crying mess on the bathroom floor while eating cherries 

me now: lmao that was so wild