Apr 28
People have beautiful things to say about you...but you must die first.
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People have beautiful things to say about you...but you must die first.
I can feel it getting worse again. Or maybe it was never better? I am good at pretending after all.
Whatever it is, I fear it will consume me. I fear I might not wake up anymore.
I fear life is just this.
I feel like a bad partner because of my bpd. My episodes are exhausting. I'm exhausting. I can't help I'm broken, but I can help my behavior. I'm so sorry. I know I apologize too much. I'm sorry you have to walk on eggshells. I feel guilt, knowing that a different partner could be easier for you. I feel guilt knowing practically no one will put up with me. Why do you?
Gaslight me all you want, I don't even care when my car's gas light turns on. ☠️☀️🫶🏻
Actually, go fuck yourself.
I have no reason to believe that this post is in anyway satire, a joke, or a ironic post given that this person's entire fucking blog praises Wilson and Vanessa Fisk and ONLY mentioned Dex in this single post. I find it fucking hilarious how you claim that people who say "Dex is a victim" are clowns when you yourself view those two as victims because, I assume, he attempted to assassinate them.
Well guess what? No one, in real life AND in fictional media, is a perfect victim. You can be a victim of medical and peer abuse, like Dex, and be a terrible person. ACKNOWLEDGING him being a victim does not automatically make him innocent. It doesn't make him a "poor baby" as you put it. Normies like you piss me the fuck off.
He's not a victim? Not a victim after Wilson took advantage of him and groomed (the practice of preparing or training someone for a particular purpose or activity) him? Vanessa taking advantage of him while he was in a drugged state, getting him to sign a contract while not sober? His therapist has and ENCOURAGES Dex to overly attach himself to her, completely depending on her? Telling him to repeat this behavior by finding his new 'North Star'? He's not a victim? Are you fucking kidding me?
Oh and I just love the ableist language by calling him a "fucking psycho". Hi, I'm a diagnosed "fucking psycho"! We struggle with this bullshit everyday, and no one who is Cluster B will and should ever have to deal with you or your grossly misinformed language. You are such a clown.
I don't care if anyone views me as over-dramatic or if I'm "blowing this out of proportion". I mean every word I say in this and I will not censor this person's user whatsoever. Ableism and gross victim blaming behavior like this hurts people, like myself (who struggle with Cluster B disorders) by feeding into this stigmatization. You deserved to get called out. I am SICK AND TIRED of you neurotypicals whining at real people and fictional portrayals of people with cluster b who so happen to do shitty things.
You can call out that shit behavior without making ableist remarks towards that individual, fictional or not. You can hate a character who so happens to have Cluster B, and not like their actions without mentioning or demonizing them with ableist language. NO ONE is a perfect victim.
If anyone agrees with what they said or disagrees with anything I have had to say in this entire post, block me. Do not interact with my blog, you are not welcome here.
"Suicide is selfish!" - stfu! Do you know what's selfish? Forcing someone to stay alive for others because other people don't want to deal with a loss.
lowk kms tonight xDD im too tired to even think im so tired of everybody i dont want to be alive and if i ever hurt anybody by my death, im sorry i tried, i dont even know what the fuck to do im never going to be free.
The urge to just destroy myself. To cut off everything. To go radio silent on everyone because my brain is absolutely convinced I'll be best off alone, locked in a tiny little box.
Why can't I just have a moment to breathe? To actually enjoy my bit of happiness I get here and there.