[pinkmisspiggy]

friendship ended with costar pattern my new source of validation

[friendly-animals]

(Source)

[jennas-ortegas-deactivated20240]

[orion-lake]

[azaleatown]

[costamacncheese]

How do I explain to my family that Brie Larson can hip thrust 400lbs without making it sound like the gayest fact I’ve ever learnt

[queer-things-and-stuff]

HoW!?

[queer-things-and-stuff]

[mens-rights-activia]

400 pounds!?!?!???

[bob-belcher]

[starlightandtears]

To all the teenagers following me that don’t hear it from their parents: I’m proud of you.

[notdoingmywork]

To all of the adults following me that never heard it from their parents: I’m proud of you, too.

[the-trans-advice-blog]

To anyone who needs to hear it: I’m so very proud of you.

[insomniac-arrest]

sometimes I see shiny things like this 

or this

and instead of admiring them the ghosts of my protestant ancestors possess me and I think shit like ‘well that’s just a little too much’

my ancestor Pain Wilhelmina Smith wacks a stick around my brain like ‘you like that Catholic shit? you gonna pay indulgences for that, huh? punk? get yee to a single room log cabin and PRAY’

anyway, my room is absolutely bare and buying a piece of clothing for over 20 dollars pains me

[insomniac-arrest]

actually, I’m sorry to admit this, but I actually mis-remembered the name of the ancestor I was thinking of

her name was Fear

[insomniac-arrest]

if you’re wondering, my puritan forebears actually had 5 children

please note Wrestling, Fear, and Love Brewster. And Jonathon.

[insomniac-arrest]

this is so funny, thank you

[mrrogerscardigans]

Bruh 😂😂😂😂😂😂.

[agreedt]

[iamlittleamz]

Ugly laugh

[lopmon]

[autohaste]

But remember, she landed just fine and so will you.

[mofohngo]

[brihann-deactivated20220622]

This is the Jackie Aina money pic. Reblog and watch your skin clear, your edges grow, and your bank account flourish!

[memetokyo]

This is my new favorite thing on the Internet

[bonzai-bunny]

i want to see the avengers play cards against humanity and i want to see them all slowly realizing that steve has the most fucked up sense of humor out of all of them

[marvel-lous-things]

Tony: Steve. Steve it’s been 2 hours. Steve please stop laughing.

Steve:

Tony, crying: Steve please what the Fuck does your card say

Steve’s cards:

[dragonzzilla]

[neverthere12345]

[dankar-camoran]

[weepingbouquettyphoon]

LOL

[cristinaricci]

You have been met with unfair critical derision for most of your 30+ years of acting. Critics reviews, internet forums and random conversations within the general populous often include the words “wooden, emotionless and flat”, despite immense proof of the contrary. You remain full of grace and integrity, however, and you continue to pursue the projects you find meaningful, never taking a role or creating something just to please the masses. You are a talented, unwavering actor, a class act and overall, a legend.  

[emphasisonthehomo]

Things Not to Do in a Cemetery

By someone who works at one. 

Please don’t leave glass items on your loved one’s grave. I understand the urge, really I do. But those vases/picture frames/beer bottles/fancy solar lights/etc are gonna break eventually, and be a pain in the ass for everyone involved. 

Different cemeteries have different regulations when it comes to what’s allowed in the park and what’s not, and some are more lenient than others about enforcing those regulations. If you’re not sure, ask someone who works there.

If you put up tiny plastic fences and solar lights and garden decorations around your loved one’s space it will probably be removed at some point bc y’all… The grounds crew needs to mow the grass. And some of that stuff is probably technically against the rules anyways, but everyone’s trying to be nice about it. 

Do not sit on or lean against any of the markers or memorials. They may all be made of granite, but the upright ones will flop right over if you push them hard enough, and if the ground is wet the flats will sink into the dirt. Also it’s fucking rude. If someone sees you sitting on their mom’s headstone, they might just kick your ass. 

Decorations around a grave will be removed if they are broken, or if a grave side service/ burial is going to take place nearby. We do need to bring heavy machinery in to dig graves, and for outside services there are also tents and chairs laid out. If you notice the decorations have been disturbed, it’s probably not vandalism BUT if you’re not sure, it never hurts to ask. 

I personally don’t care if you want to place food or drink on your loved one’s grave. It’s very common. But if you complain about ants all over the headstone, and I go out to see that it’s because you left a whole ass packet of oreos and an open six pack of corona, I’m not gonna be impressed or happy. Like I’ll be nice about it, but I will think you’re a dumbass. 

If the cemetery allows you to bring pets into the park, that’s great. That’s chill. Please pick up after them. No one likes to see a big pile of dog shit in the middle of the cremation garden. 

Do not fuck in the cemetery. I swear to fucking god. Don’t even make out in the cemetery. You shouldn’t be doing that shit in public anyways. I don’t care about your morbid goth fetish. Some grandma is going to see you getting frisky next to her son’s grave, and beat you to death with her purse and the ten pounds of silk floral arrangements she brought to place there.

Don’t be afraid to visit. We want these parks to be a place where you can both mourn and celebrate the person who died. I regularly see families who have picnics out there, especially on holidays. If you haven’t visited in a while and aren’t sure where your loved one is, ask someone on staff. It’s our job to help you find them, and no one is going to judge you for visiting for the first time in like 10 years. 

[emphasisonthehomo]

Due to recent events, I have decided to update my list.

Do not be naked in the cemetery.

[aerialsquid]

…I would like OP to expand on ‘recent events’ here.