sarai.

Welcome to my blog! My name is Sarai ! I'm 22 and I love the MCU. Requests are open! wattpad. twitter. masterlist. face.

[versegm]

Literally cannot emphasize enough that my #1 writing advice is to stop being afraid. Stop being afraid of sounding too cringe, or too stupid, or too horrifying, or too horny, or too weird, or too much, or too little, or too you. You need to put your entire pussy into your art. Sure, it won't be to everyone's tastes, but if you keep yourself to the blandest tamest safest roads possible you will be of no one's tastes, not even yours.

[caseywond3r]

hey guys so apparently this is a thing a lot of people don't realise but like. if you have had writer's block/ art block for like. six months. a year. two years. that's maybe not a block. that's maybe depression. and you should maybe look into treating the source of the problem instead of just beating yourself up for not being able to write/draw. be kind to yourself and know that your struggle to create isn't based in laziness or a lack of skill or talent.

[brvdges]

This is really why I've been gone for some time. I'm trying to be back, but its so hard to find the time now that other things have filled it due to my original lack of motivation. I'm still posting where I can and trying to work on a full-length book for you. I'm just happy to be alive.

[brvdges]

Nirvana - Peter Parker Pt. I

Thought I'd drop in with a treat even if it's something a bit different than usual. 

Here’s something I wrote a long while ago featuring two of my original characters. Roman Abbiati-Stark and Amani (‘Mani) are my babies, and I’ve held them close to my chest for the past six years. Hoping I’ll bring you a full-length story featuring them soon. Until then, here’s a short that introduces the love triangle between them and Peter. For ambiance, I listened to Nirvana by Sam Smith when I originally wrote this.

Summary: Roman makes her move on Peter *finally* Stark!Daughter x Peter Parker; written prior to Infinity War & Endgame being posted for the first time

Word Count: 1927

Warnings: Alcohol mentions?

She was leaning back against the wall, her tan arms folded across her chest as she watched him. Her lustful hazel eyes watched Peter through long black lashes, a passionate fire dancing in them. Everything in her ached to be with him- to kiss him, touch him, make the boy feel alive for once. As much as she loved 'Mani, there was no way in hell she and Peter would last another month.

The two were too awkward for their own good, both stuttering over their words, to afraid to make a move. 'Mani may have won him over momentarily, but she knew Ro always got what she wanted when she wanted it; and what the beautiful hazel-eyed girl wanted right now was Peter.

Even though the topic had been avoided at all costs, both girls knew how the other felt about Peter. They swore never to let a boy get in between them because it was catty, yet here they were. Scratching out each other’s eyes any time he even looked in their direction and if Ro was being honest with herself- he wasn’t all that. No, he definitely wasn’t. He was the complete opposite of all that and yet he managed to catch her attention faster than a sale when she was on a bender.

She could never quite put her freshly manicured finger on what it was that made her so interested. Peter was geek central, the boy stuttered when she first spoke to him. His smile was easily the sexiest thing she’d ever seen, and she’d met Clooney at one of her dad’s parties before. He was all brains like her, was that it? The fact that he could keep up and even match, not only her attitude but her smarts as well? It made him anti-social and caused his cute self to stutter like shit. Hell, he still owned Legos, but damn. The boy was irresistibly charming. Is that what made him so enticing?

He was sitting on a crisp white couch, laughing at a joke, 'Mani made. His eyes lit up with joy as he clutched his sides and as he smiled, Ro could swear she saw a faint glow around his head. Peter Parker was fucking perfect, and she wanted him.

Her dark eyebrows furrowed as her pink lips turned downwards, watching as 'Mani put her hand on his. The smaller girl had her legs on his lap and was actively telling him a story, gesturing wildly every few seconds. When she spotted her looking, she squeezed his hand and even leaned in closer so her nose was grazing his cheek as they laughed.

The bass thumped from the stereo, so much she could feel the vibration as she looked away quickly, focusing her gaze on something else instead. The brown drink in her hand, she scrunched her nose before tossing her head back and taking a swig. The drink burned at her throat, going down more smoothly as more of the liquid coated it. She wiped at her lips with the back of her hand before pushing through hot, sweaty gyrating bodies to another nearby couch. Sadly, she now sat across from the lovebirds.

“Who wants to play seven minutes in heaven?!" the hostess squealed, an empty girly drink bottle in her hand. She plopped down next to Ro, who scooted over and placed it on the table. A few kids made their way over, some she recognized from her short-lived time at Midtown.

"Okay, so since I’m the hostess,” she touched her heart and paused for effect, “I get to pick who’ll go first.” She looked around the circle, her cold blue gaze analyzing every participant before they landed on Ro, “You.”

Before she could object, the bottle was spun, and as if the heavens had heard her pleas, it landed on him, Peter Parker. As soon as his eyes met hers, she knew that this was God telling her to make her move.

They were directed down the hall to an old closet, pretty dim and small, and shoved inside. Although it seemed barely big enough for the clothes that were in it, they fit just fine.

He was nervous, and she could tell. The boy was practically radiating it, he needed a bit more courage than the beers he had been drinking. So she reached into her purse and pulled out a flask before offering it to him. He took it and smiled softly before taking a swig, his eyes squeezed shut as he swallowed the mix.

She took that time to admire him. She swore if her adrenaline hadn’t kicked in, she’d be a sweaty mess just like him. His shirt clung to him due to the amount of heat in such a small place, and she was tempted to tell him to just take it off. She didn’t want him to get the wrong idea about her though - even though it’d be right. He handed her the flask from which she took her own hearty drink.

“Ro,” he began, shoving his hands into his jeans pockets, “Y-you look amazing tonight.” He bit his lip awkwardly as he took in the sight before him. Roman was dressed in a tight deep red dress that hugged her body perfectly, accentuating her hips and chest. It didn’t help that she at some point had applied a deep red lipstick - that matched her dress and nails; since he had last looked at her when she was standing up against the wall. Her dark brown tresses were curled at the ends and elegantly framed her face. Unlike the rest of her glamorous outfit, she wore red converses to match. Needlessly to say, she was gorgeous.

“I was going for the signature Stark look, classy but casual.” She chuckled, looking down at her shoes. The tops were covered in tiny miscellaneous sketches of coffee cups, homes, and heartbeats. “Putting on the converses was the only way, my dad would let me out,” she rolled her eyes, “even though I told him numerous times that it was a formal thing.” She pushed a loose curl behind her ear, “You know my dad.”

The memory of Tony threatening to show up in the suit if some guy even glanced her way played in her head. Peter chuckled as if reading her mind, “Yeah, I do.” He rocked back and forth on his feet, just being near her made him nervous.

“Ro,” “Pete,” they spoke in unison, and she let out a melodic laugh, batting her mascara’d lashes at him. Her bright smile made his stomach do flips as he took in the beauty that was Roman Stark. In his slightly drunken haze, she looked like a goddess, he could practically see her on a throne and even his tipsy mind knew there was no way she’d ever go for him. Yet his eyes stared anyway, taking in as much of her beauty as possible before it was taken. Her hazel eyes had specks of green in them, he’d noticed, and she smelled like roses and alcohol, “You first.” She chuckled.

“I’m sorry we haven’t been able to- able, able,…” She held back a laugh as he processed the word, “…able to hang out as much lately.” He apologized, shrugging his shoulders sheepishly. “It’s cool,” her voice was smooth like silk, “Can’t spend all your time with me, you’d get bored.” She feigned sadness, clutching her hand to her chest. He gasped, “By the Roman Stark? Never.”

It was quiet for a few moments before she spoke, “But since we’re here…” She bit her lip, now realizing how close they were. His body was up against hers pressing her up against the wall. Her heart fluttered as his hand brushed against her leg on its way to her hand. He was sure she could feel his body heat radiating off of him, “I wanted to address to elephant in the room.” Her red lips went up in a smirk and a smug look flashed upon her features, “Is that so?” he asked

“Yeah, the fact that you’re flirting with me.” she joked, and he gasped, “Me? No, not- not at all!” She lightly tapped his shoulder as she looked into his brown eyes. “How much have you had to drink tonight?” She asked, her eyes filling with worry. She had been drinking herself, but it was completely unlike Peter to drink.

“I should be asking you the same,” he paused. “You’re so pretty.” he mumbled, and Roman cocked an eyebrow, “You’re fucking shit-faced.” She giggled, stepping forward and tripping over her own two feet before grabbing his shoulder for balance. “It wasn’t a lot! Besides, that was hours ago. Also prior to popular belief, I'm not a lightweight!” He whined. She raised an eyebrow, a smile tugging at her lips, “Oh, really, Parker? What would- What would Aunt May have to say about that?”

“She doesn’t know. Besides Amani-”

That was when they kissed, she didn’t want to hear a word about Amani. Their lips met, and Roman’s heart seemed to turn into fireworks. She was the damn fourth of July. It caught Peter off guard, but he quickly gained his composure, kissing back. It also seemed the drink had given him some courage as he ran his hand up and down the side of Roman’s leg.

It eventually led to him haphazardly placing a mixture of spontaneous but gentle kisses down her neck towards her collarbone. His head was telling him to go for it, and it seemed that Roman was giving the green light as she was encouraging him; her breathing hitching the further down he went.

Suddenly, he stopped and avoided her eyes. The previous events caused him to stutter, “Was- was that okay?”

“Hell yes, do that again.” She answered before forcefully pressing her lips to his in a heated kiss. Their close proximity had an effect on Roman as her stomach filled with butterflies and he kissed down her collarbone towards her chest. She pulled him closer before giving him a taste of his own medicine, kissing down the paler boy’s neck.

She kissed lightly, teasing him before she found his sweet spot. Slowly, she sucked at his skin, leaving dark red and purple marks in her wake. His eyes were closed and his mouth open in wonder. She smirked to herself - her wish had been granted.

Yet this was too good to be true, she had been given a gift. No, a blessing, and even her brain’s cloudy thoughts knew it. “Peter?” She mumbled, pressing her forehead against his, and wrapping her arms around his neck. “Mhm?” his eyes were still closed, and he was trying to take in the moment.

“Do you want this?” She whispered, staring at his features, trying to discern the look on his face. He opened his eyes and his brown ones met her hazels, “Yes.”

That was all she needed, and in a heartbeat, they were walking out of the closet towards an open bedroom. He walked inside and plopped down on the bed as she locked the door behind them, “You’re sure?” She asked.

In the moonlight, she was a goddess, and he was a mere mortal. The way the light hit her olive skin as she leaned against the door, her hazel eyes were striking as she awaited his response. He wasn’t sure if it was the drink talking or him, but he swore that she cast a spell on him when he nodded his head eagerly, “I want this, Ro.”

She sat down next to him, closer than Amani had been. Her lips grazed his and he sighed, “I want you, Ro.”

“That’s all I need.”

[brvdges]

untitled pt. I

I did it.

I unfollowed him, and soon after, I also found my finger hovering over the “remove follower” button.

Uncertainty plagued me as I decided whether or not cutting all ties was worth it. I thought about if he’d notice at all. If it would even occur to him that I no longer appeared on his feed. Mmm… I had caught myself. Those kinds of thoughts were exactly the driving force behind such an impulsive decision. 

I quickly hit “remove follower” before setting my phone down and letting the air escape my lungs. I wanted something I was told I couldn’t have, I wanted it more than anything. I often found myself latching onto everything, anything. Hoping, wishing, wanting. This will be the one. I’ll finally feel seen, recognized, something. It never goes that way though.

It has been a month now. Two days ago was a month, to be exact, and I’m not like keeping track or anything because I’m sad. I mean, I kinda am, but not particularly over him. I’m sad over the feeling I would get when his name popped up on my screen.

The hurried nature in which I would unlock my phone to get even a glimpse in the midst of my personal chaos of what he felt I needed to know enough that he just had to text me. I’m sad over first dates that never became second ones. I’m sad about ice cream in the park. I’m sad about missed calls that turn into canceled plans and before long, a text ending it all. Oh God, or even worse, no text at all. I miss the idea of being in love, or deep like, with someone. I miss not feeling like shit because it didn’t turn out the way I planned.

…I miss the idea of being wanted.

So, as I sit at the table staring regretfully at my phone, I remind myself that it is truly for the best. Sometimes, the best decisions are truly the hardest.

[nishinoyaforthesoul]

its that time of year again

[foxssleeplessness]

[natti-ice-deactivated20221207]

They’re a 10 but they’re fictional and dead

[space-mouse]

i love unhinged women but i also love women who try so fucking hard to be hinged. clinging to those hinges by her fingernails.

[brvdges]

Me

[nishinoyaforthesoul]

its that time of year again

[najd-social-club]

I’m such a “Can I have a kiss” every 5 seconds kind of person.

[anexperimentallife]

[touhou-memories]

Shut up or I’ll rail you:

[shy-lian]

[mango-pickle]

was told to straighten my posture and align my heels. i now stand corrected

[mango-pickle]

the reviews are in

[shoobie-doowop]

remember in School of Rock where the black girl was afraid to say she wanted to be a singer because she was fat and didn’t want to get laughed at but Dewey was all “who gives a shit, I’m fat too and so is aretha franklin but we’re still valuable and we rock” and then the girl felt better without having to be told that beauty comes in all sizes or some other bullshit. thats the kind of body positivity I’m looking for. tell these babies that they’re worth a damn without tying it to any other arbitrary ideals

[bookshelfdreams]

Also like. when she asks him why he isn’t on a diet. and you just know she has heard this dumb “tip” a million times before (“just go on a diet!” “if you really apply yourself you can easily use x amount of weight!” “you just don’t want it enough!”)

& Dewey just

there’s nothing wrong! with liking food! and being hungry! you don’t need to starve yourself to fit into some bs aesthetic! eat food!

[wetwareproblem]

If we’re loving on this moment I’d also like to note: There are a bunch of examples he could have gone for. Hell, he could have said “Jack Black” and it would’ve been a cute little wink at the camera.

But he specifically cited a black woman who was indisputably one of the greats. Someone Tomika could see herself in. And I feel like that’s really important.

[aparadoxsstuff]

what is fanfic if not thirst persevering

[hidingoutbackstage]

Ngl I was not prepared for where this was going

[femmeharlequin-deactivated20240]

Me: oh okay she’s lipsynching her song

Me: Is that-

Me:

[stygian-river]

I LITERALLY had the experience of seeing Tony Hawk and going “a man” and then he picked up a skateboard and I was like “TONY HAWK???”

[oncelerfucker69-deactivated2019]

Ted bundy isn't ugly, you're just a lesbian

Congratulations, this is the worst ask I’ve ever gotten

[hollowboobtheory]

reblog if you’re a lesbian, support lesbians, or think ted bundy is ugly