Princess? Honey I’m The Queen Bee

Hagrid deserved better

[starofhisheart]

Happy pride to those 5 seconds where Charlie Swan thought Jacob was coming out to him in the most insane way possible

[carmelcup2]

[queen-of-crows]

Not trying to victim blame or anything but you’d think with all the times necromancers have tried/succeeded in raising undead armies the people of Tamriel would’ve stopped burying their dead fully armed and equipped for battle.

Like, I know your great grandpa’s sword was A Part Of Him and all but maybe you could bury SuperDeathblade somewhere not right next to SuperDeathbladeMan. Just in case.

[karhs]

oh, what, so he can get his ass kicked when he inevitably gets raised from the dead?? you want to make great grandpa into a loser? a chump?? if his corpse is going to be puppeteered into battle by a sick and twisted sorcerer then by the nine he is going to do it well

[bilover]

if i bring a book someplace it doesn't necessarily mean i want to read it mayb i just want to take her on a walk. Get her some fresh air and a change of scenery

[theconcealedweapon]

[welpnotagain]

Happy anniversary to the 2021 Suez Canal obstruction. 23–29 March 2021 were the funniest 6 days and 7 hours we could have ever asked for.

[girlactionfigure]

Link

[anauthorandherservicedog]

I believe he also now has a library card.

[darlingvagary]

He does!

[elizabethsillymoose]

Y'all!!! It's almost time to stab Caesar!

[nikayna]

[elizabethan-memes]

Honestly as a Tudor history nerd I do not understand people who find Wuthering Heights confusing.

"The names keep repeating" there's only two Catherines, what are you talking about? Henry VIII married more Catherines than that.

[coffee-without-anesthetics]

forgive me father for i have opened a notification and read the message within to make the red dot go away and then forgot to reply for a month . it will happen again

[whynotfabulous]

In an effort to avoid supporting megacorporations, I shall now be posing questions directly to tumblr that I would otherwise have googled.

[whynotfabulous]

If Mayonnaise is just eggs and oil, why it creamy?

[gnomer-denois]

Because it's also evil

[whynotfabulous]

Thanks!

Have scientists figured out what dark matter is yet?

[you-can-be-what-you-want-to-be]

Yup! It’s anything that takes up space, has mass, and is goth.

[whynotfabulous]

Wow!

What happens if you eat 23 packages of peeps?

[trashboi413]

You meet god

[whynotfabulous]

Thank goodness!

What's the correct way to eat a banana?

[treslecheslife]

Whole, in one gulp.

[whynotfabulous]

Delicious!

Who is the Muffin Man?

[captain-oh-no-not-again]

Father of the Muffin Boy

[whynotfabulous]

Makes sense!

Why is my car making a ker-klunk noise?

[mayflydecember]

Car's haunted

[whynotfabulous]

Uh Oh

How to fix a haunted car?

[babybluebanshee]

Slam into a priest in a crosswalk going at least forty miles an hour

[whynotfabulous]

It worked!

Where does the wax in scented candles go?

[thegoodsandy]

into the sky, where it turns into stars

[whynotfabulous]

Cool!

Why are weddings so damn expensive?

[daeynore]

priest has to pay for medical bills related to haunted car crashing into him

[whynotfabulous]

....Ah

[whynotfabulous]

ChatGPT WISHES it was this coherent and creative

[voyage-of-the-porn-spreader]

tgis is so fucking funny to me. they accidentally Rock Lee'd a retired racehorse

[voyage-of-the-porn-spreader]

imagine youre a fat horse and your new neighbour is a personal trainer

[voyage-of-the-porn-spreader]

horse that reads Marcus Aurelius

[voyage-of-the-porn-spreader]

I was wrong. they didnt rock lee him. this horse is literally Gai. and i wish he was my dad

[moss-wizard]

What a year this week has been.

[we-dont-matteratall]

It’s Monday.

[jacuwi]

It sure as hell is.

[actualaster]

The earlier in the day Monday you reblog the funnier this gets

[dettadixit]

a humble addition at 10am

[sudaca-swag]

as a woman in the ozempics era you HAVE to have friends who eat normally (3-4 meals a day, no girl dinner bullshit) and who are always down to going to cafes and eating burguers and fries and stuff, I cannot stress how vital for your mental health it is to have friends with whom you feel free to say you're hungry at any time and with whom you feel free to eat as much as you want

[tomfoolerytotality]

Looking back on 2020, I think it's hilarious that Wellerman of all shanties is the one that blew up online. It's not a song about life on the high seas or adventuring

It's the "Where the fuck is my delivery" song

[stevishabitat]

[badjokesbyjeff]

New York is the exact opposite of Minnesota. New York is where the Big Apple is and Minnesota is where Minneapolis