The Science of Aster

"Courage is the magic that turns dreams into reality"--Aster Laker, (DotNW) Kage/Aster (respond to either) | Adult (30+) | Queer AF | Any pronouns, but prefer xe/xem/xir or he/they | Profic | Check my About/BYF for more details on my views | Icon/Sidebar image colored by the absolutely most amazing person ever, Goron-King-Darunia (also my partner/soulmate)~ ~ FOR MOBILE USERS: ~ || Writing Sideblog || Art Sideblog || AO3 || Alt (kinky) AO3 || Tags || Fandoms || Ships || OCs || Gaming || Ko-Fi || DotNW Sideblog || DetCo Sideblog

[actualaster]

you know what the w o r s t thing about adhd is? (at least i think this one is the adhd, could be one of the 429432 other things i have)

time is meaningless.

which means if i have one (1) thing that i need to do, my brain has to block the entire day out for it.

which means that even if it’s technically a “day off” if i have one (1) important obligation–even if it’s only gonna take like 2 hours out of hte day–my brain doesn’t count it as a “day off” so i don’t actually get to use it to decompress from everything else

which is how i end up going weeks or months without having a “day off” that my brain will register as such so my stress levels just keep compounding, and my energy levels keep plummeting, and it’s hell on earth is what it is

[actualaster]

...In true ADHD fashion, guess who accidentally deleted the wrong post because and they were multi-tasking and got distracted and then had to Google to find this again?

(':

[actualaster]

I feel like there's something either ironic or painfully blatant wish fulfillment or maybe both somehow that I've got an outline that's "suicidal character is offered a chance to die without suffering, ends up being helped to see all that they have to live for, and being brought back to life and supported after"

[hthrrloooo]

Catastrophize Benedictine

[actualaster]

Browsing the used bookstore is actually very grounding even if you're not buying anything

[actualaster]

Ooooooh that's probably not good.

Reality' gettin' fuzzy around the edges

[actualaster]

I'm trapped in a special type of hell where trying to do even the slightest level of looking into something I really, really want causes me to crash into an intense downward spiral of self-hate, self-doubt, and triggers an existential crisis.

I hate this so much

[tieflingkisser]

[lesbianslimefriend]

here's where to find it on windows 10

[the-tiny-dragons-tea-room]

Ugh, it was in mine. It's off now.

[the-tiny-dragons-tea-room]

IT GETS WORSE

I had to turn this off, but it's something that allows Windows and anyone using your device to generate text/images.

LOBOTOMIZE YOUR MACHINES

[actualaster]

Watched somebody use the public local text chat to respond to a compliment about their character with a proposition for a 3-way and get shot down with something that very heavily implied they'd just asked a minor for sex.

I think I'm going to go hang out in a different location while I eat, that's enough of... Whatever the hell is going on there.

[seldomsee]

[coai]

Coai Week 2026 Day 1 Prompt:

Lily of the Incas: Indescribable Connection

Such strong connection that language is limited when trying to explain it— If that doesn't encompass the bond between Conan & Ai, then nothing can!

Alstroemeria, commonly called the Peruvian lily or lily of the Incas, is a genus of flowering plants native to South America. There are over a 100 species of Lily of the Incas, with varying colours and stripes, and these flowers can be found in almost all types of habitat.

In Hanakotoba (the Japanese language of flowers), the "Lily of the Incas" primarily symbolizes devotion, enduring friendship, and mutual support. Because this flower’s leaves grow upside down and twist out from the stem, it represents the unpredictable twists and turns of life. It is the perfect flower to tell someone, "I've got your back".

Sounds like a sturdy and versatile flower... Just as the bond between Conan and Ai seems to have many strands to it, and ever evolving. What a great pick to start CoAi Week with - highlighting the undeniable connection of our ship!

────﹒♡﹒────

For more information and official flower meanings check our FAQ page

[actualaster]

Oh please no. We're at "risk of root canal" territory for one tooth...

With luck it won't be an issue, but given my dental history...

Ugh.

[actualaster]

Nice, at the dentist and they remembered immediately that I need like. 2-3x the normal amount of local anesthetic, that it takes longer to kick in, and that it wears off notably faster than normal for me.

Which means no needing to plead my case of "please just give me extra you will have to stop mid-procedure to give me more otherwise please just START with extra" only to be told "weeeeell... let's see how it goes" and, inevitably, need extra.

[parakeet]

just saw a 'comments' tab on someones blog you know where the following and likes tabs would be if enabled and it was just showing all the replies theyve made on peoples posts. this is fascinating when did this feature come out

[parakeet]

EMERGENCY - ITS AUTO ENABLED!

if you've made replies on posts there is now a tab on your blog showing every post youve replied to and your reply.

if this is not what you want, either go to your blog and click comments and disable it from there or just go to your individual blogs setting pages. just change it from blue to grey if you dont want everyone to see your replies AND the post you're replying to

PLEASE BE ADVISED that it is set to disabled for blogs that have not made any replies but it will turn ON if you reply with that blog in the future.! i just tested it with my main, which was greyed out but it turned on the moment i left a test reply

figured i'd get the word out bc i have not seen a single mention of this and i'm sure there are plenty of people who maybe comment on things they don't want on display for everyone to see on their blog lol. you can still look at your replies with it toggled off just no one else can, like locking the following and likes list

[parakeet]

so for some reason this feature was actually announced on the tumblr engineering blog. interesting choice not to reblog it to the staff or tumblr blog, esp considering they asked for user input on how to implement it, but i suppose considering the response to the last update maybe the replies would be too overwhelming...

so couple of clarifications. comments are disabled as default for primary blogs that have their likes disabled. they are seemingly enabled for all other blogs that have replied to posts

posts you comment on may show on your followers 'for you' page if you leave your replies publically available. they may, in the future, show in on your followers dashboard if your follower goes to their dash settings and enables this. apparently, if your likes are enabled, your followers can already see those on the dash if they've gone into preferences and selected to do so, which I was unaware of, and that seems to be disabled at default, but it's possible i disabled it previously and forgot about it ig

[my-dailydreams]

[actualaster]

I wonder if "it's fine" is the lie I tell myself to avoid dealing with the mess that not being okay brings.

Or if it's that it's the only way I know to express "I'm not okay, but however Not Okay I am, I'm not in danger just suffering"

[actualaster]

I've clawed my way out of deeper and steeper holes before so I can do it again, I'm just gonna complain the entire time

[papayajuan2019]

nobody know for sure how long ago a week is