tatum @c0ncrete-sh0es - Tumblr Blog

mobydyke

I think sitting on the floor of the ocean for a few hours would fix me

mobydyke

I should be a shipwreck

c0ncrete-sh0es

Existence is an ocean.

Most people get boats to travel around in. Some people have speed boats and yachts, but not me. For most of my life I had a small raft, but somewhere over the past year I’ve lost it. I am all alone in this vast expanse of water. Sometimes people come by and have a chat with me. They look out over the railing to see me wading and they remark on how well I can swim. Some even let me sit on their boat for a bit. But eventually, they tire of the stranger taking up space in their nautical haven, and I’m back out on my own.

I watch as everyone around me gets to cut through the waves with ease. They may worry about storms, about what would happen should they capsize, but it is a fleeting thought. For they know they would not be stranded for long. They will always have another boat to come and save them. They will never know how hard it is to paddle through an unrelenting sea with nothing to cling to. How terrifying it truly is to weather the storms they get to sit safely hidden from.

It’s getting harder and harder to fight the violent waves. I can feel the current starting to take control. I’m no longer swimming, but fighting to keep my head above water. It would be so easy to let the sea win. To slip beneath the surface and let the salt water fill my lungs. Sinking further and further until not even light can reach me.

I’d make friends with the deep sea fishes and make a home in the darkness.

c0ncrete-sh0es

Dear reader,

She found a piece of driftwood and turned it into small raft. She captains her makeshift vessel with pride and grit. But now, she has a first mate. Someone to lean on when things get hard. Someone to steer them on when she needs resting. It’s still hard. So very, very hard. But it’s better. The days are long and there are very few breaks, but she is no longer drowning. She can rest her head on his shoulder and admire the sun setting over her ocean - for this ocean is hers. Not to be claimed by any other. She will wrestle with the waves and become their master. She will fight back and conquer the ocean and reign for as long as she lives.

She watches the sun slip beneath the horizon and smiles because she knows that it will all be okay. She will fortify her raft into a dingy, and eventually find herself on the most beautiful boat the only she could have made. She can see all of this in the stars in her sky. She is hopeful. She is well.

Going to use tumblr as a personal diary of sorts which I know is “How not to use the internet 101” but it’s kind of perfect. It gives me the satisfaction of putting something out there but with no strings. Twitter is a hellhole now but it’s too short anyways. This is the perfect long form space where no one will see what I write. Modern day screaming into the void.

It’s always hard explaining that I never feel “uncomfortable” silence. If there’s nothing to say I simply don’t say anything. I’m comfortable being left alone with my thoughts. And I hate when people ask “what are you thinking about?” Like how do I tell you I’ve had 14 different trains of thought since you stopped talking and now I’m thinking about what it would be like to be a citizen of Pompeii on volcano day. It always feels so intrusive. My thoughts are my own, not to be shared with anyone else. Just because you can’t stand what’s going on in your own head doesn’t mean I need to participate in the dry conversation you make to fill the empty space between us.

Existence is an ocean.

Most people get boats to travel around in. Some people have speed boats and yachts, but not me. For most of my life I had a small raft, but somewhere over the past year I’ve lost it. I am all alone in this vast expanse of water. Sometimes people come by and have a chat with me. They look out over the railing to see me wading and they remark on how well I can swim. Some even let me sit on their boat for a bit. But eventually, they tire of the stranger taking up space in their nautical haven, and I’m back out on my own.

I watch as everyone around me gets to cut through the waves with ease. They may worry about storms, about what would happen should they capsize, but it is a fleeting thought. For they know they would not be stranded for long. They will always have another boat to come and save them. They will never know how hard it is to paddle through an unrelenting sea with nothing to cling to. How terrifying it truly is to weather the storms they get to sit safely hidden from.

It’s getting harder and harder to fight the violent waves. I can feel the current starting to take control. I’m no longer swimming, but fighting to keep my head above water. It would be so easy to let the sea win. To slip beneath the surface and let the salt water fill my lungs. Sinking further and further until not even light can reach me.

I’d make friends with the deep sea fishes and make a home in the darkness.

catchymemes

10 Coronavirus myths debunked by this smart guy.

mjalti

daddy issues make u a people pleaser but mommy issues make u like. a sociopath

kakyoiin

nightofthecreeps

I asked my lawyer if I could make that joke and he said, “let me call another lawyer”, and that lawyer said yes.

JOHN MULANEY SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE 02/29/2020

hungwy

I wish I could terrorize ancient people with things that are commonplace today

despazito

releasing a roomba into the greek forums

gretchensinister

Giving someone six geese (a-laying, and thus in full protect-the-nest mode), much less SEVEN SWANS, does not seem to me, to be, per se, an act of true love