Can I Get A Uhhhhhhhhh… BIG MACK?

Hullo, I’m Reese (he/they). Pan/Ace and a Demiboy (maybe? Probably. I’m at least some flavor of transmasc). Lvl 25. I almost never tag anything so spoiler warning here I guess. Icon by my friend Sitch!!! I write sometimes. Current Brainrot includes: Star Trek, The Orville, In Space With Markiplier, Darkside Detective, Cassette Beasts!

[caffeinatedreese]

CaffeinatedReese

Masterpost

I figured I might as well make a guide to all my stuff instead of throwing it in my bio like usual! I haven’t updated my fic blogs in forever but the masterlists are still there to enjoy!

Good Omens Fanfic Blog

Egos Fanfic Blog

Ao3

My Art Blog

My Stanley Parable Blog

[samreich]

four equally well-fitted suits

[sticksandsharks]

96 little guys for your consideration (and perhaps... purchase...)

[mynaemsophie-deactivated2026031]

reblog to bap prev with your paw

[only-cat-memes]

[slyrivers]

I love this so much, I’m gonna start saying “nuts” we need to bring it back

[libralthinking]

I love b&w proper ladies breaking character with “sonofabitch”

[yooterus-deactivated20220126]

“OHH you’re following me, oUUhhh I didn’t know that!”

[j-liz]

“And tried to uh…. ….NUTS!”

[iamoutofideas]

*puts my cigarettes out on you*

[frogmoss1]

*wuickly smokes it all before you can reach me*

[iamoutofideas]

oh a wise guy huh? *rolls up my sleeves* why I oughta…

[frogmoss1]

*wuickly rolls your sleeves back down before you can hit me*

[kaijuno]

[kittykattaffy]

Yeah, that doesn't prevent pregnancy.

[kaijuno]

Dfgajagakala it’s so you don’t get a UTI 😂

[jabberwockypie]

*facepalm* So, given that sex ed in the US is a tire fire:

Vagina-having people have a shorter urethra, which means we’re more prone to UTIs because the bacteria doesn’t have to travel as far to get up into your bladder and cause a problem.

Which means if you’re exposing your bits to bacteria (as with sex), peeing will flush out bacteria in the urethra. (Urine isn’t actually sterile - that’s a myth - but you’re *supposed to* have a little bit of bacteria - that’s how bodies work. But it still flushes things out that shouldn’t be there.)

Oh! You should ALSO pee after you masturbate, especially if it involves penetration with fingers/toys/etc

[jabberwockypie]

So I’ve blocked like five transphobes on this post, which I feel should have been relatively uncontroversial.

If you’re one of the people saying “You meant ‘women’”, fuck you. I meant “people who have a vagina, regardless of their gender or lack thereof”, and you can go fuck yourself with a cactus.

And you should pee afterward, so you don’t get a UTI.

[silveryoasis]

Lmao! That last line! 😂

[thotsoflore]

Keep this in mind if you recently started having sex again after vaginoplasty. It's a super important habit to get into. Especially if you weren't super careful about it preop.

[ultirex]

“feeling like a person again” collection

[bruzum]

[motherfucker-somewhat-limited]

[koiagain]

I guess you could say he’s ve… he’s a very h…

[c3rvida3]

When I was in the hospital, they gave me a big bracelet that said ALLERGY, but like. I'm allergic to bees. Were they going to prescribe me bees in there.

[mothocean]

[asphodelimago]

So there's a medication called hyaluronidase. It's used to make other medications absorb better, because it makes the cell wall more permeable.

One common usage is to make local anesthetic more effective during surgery, for instance. It's used in a number of injected medications.

Bee stings contain an enzyme very similar to this medication, so sometimes, people with bee allergies have an allergic reaction to hyaluronidase.

This is called cross-reactivity, where your body mistakes something for the thing it's actually allergic to, and has an allergic reaction anyway. For instance, sometimes people with latex allergies also are allergic to bananas and other fruits. They don't actually contain latex, but there are some similar proteins.

Apparently, hyraluronidase used in humans is derived from one of four sources: sheep testicles, cow testicles, cow testicles again, and GMO hamster ovaries.

tl;dr: They won't inject you with bees, but they might inject you with purified cow testicle juice, and your body might say 'eh, cow balls are BASICALLY bees' and try to kill you anyway.

[bearbellyblog]

The world is full of such beauty and wonder. Thank you for that sentence.

[kinuko]

[animentality]

[seymourworld]

i yhink a pangolin could be puppies doggies

[seymourworld]

you can find this in any dog park playing fetch and going schlop schlop schlop at the big water bowl

[uwillneverknowwho]

Literally always take headphones with you. If you decide that you probably won't need them today, that's the devil talking. You will. You will