i'm also @liioncourrt // @maayhemvotee incase anyone was wondering...
Xuebing Du
Three Goblin Art

if i look back, i am lost
will byers stan first human second
sheepfilms
todays bird

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titsay
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
Sade Olutola
ojovivo
Jules of Nature
Game of Thrones Daily
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year

Origami Around
One Nice Bug Per Day
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
Today's Document

izzy's playlists!

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@callme-mxtt
i'm also @liioncourrt // @maayhemvotee incase anyone was wondering...
Interviewer, catching Damian in costume: Robin! Can you explain the process of picking up Robin or passing on the mantle?
Damian, mildly annoyed at Bruce at the moment: It's quite simple. Batmam steals young children from their bed, usually nine or ten or so. Then he takes you to his lair and give you a deal.
Damian: If you can beat him in a game of your choosing, he will train you to be Robin. If you lose, you are eaten. I beat him in a classic fencing game. He's quite good with swords, but he wasn't very good with the sport itself.
Tim, standing next to him: Yeah, I beat him at a memory card game. I like totally cheated, but I'm too old for him to eat now, so ot doesn't matter.
Damian, nodding: Yes. The worst part of the job is disposing of failed Robins bones. He usually sucks them clean and leaves them all over the floor.
Tim: Yeah, its messy. But after you hit, like 15 he stops trying to eat you, so that's cool.
Damian: I have not yet reached 15. I'm still in danger. If you have more questions, ask Nightwing, as he was the first to avoid being eaten.
-
Same interviewer, at a different date: Mr. Nightwing. Is it true Batman tries to eat potential Robins?
Dick, who has no idea what she's taking about: Yeah, it's really scary. His jaw unhinges like a snake.
its so sad when u have a headache from looking at a screen and wearing headphones all day. bc its like ewwww i feel bad i wanna crawl into a bed and put on headphones and look at a screen. but actually what will cure you is going outside and staring at the mountains or something. terrible. awful
not 'Talia being Jason's adoptive mother' or 'Talia being another adult who fucked Jason over', but a secret third thing: asshole Aunt Talia who accidentially got Jason accepted into the Al Ghul family, regrets it, and now they're dicks to each other about it.
Jason is just naturally very good at annoying people, and in his mind, Talia is the reason he has to deal with pit rage for the rest of his life. of course he's going to be a little shit. Talia isn't a mother to him (he's had enough with mothers after Sheila), but rather he sees her like some audacious older sister/aunt figure. Talia realised having Jason around was a burden the second he beat her at chess one time and has never once treated him like a child, let alone a child in her care, so they end up with the weird dynamic of being almost family but also pissing each other off akin to Jim and Dwight from the office.
the funniest part about it is that Ra's? is fine with Jason. like sure he's a fuckin' asshole but he's good at his job around the league; is powerful and a worthy heir, not to mention he's a good tutor to Damian who adores Jason with his whole soul. the only thing is he and Talia don't get along and so obviously this means Ra's has to spend his spare time dealing with his heir/chief general and his daughter pissing each other the fuck off like CHILDREN. he is so tired.
Talia: i swear, Jason, i can and will send you back to the pit!
Ra's head in hand: what now?
Talia: he tripped me on the way in!
Jason, working a bodyguard shift and absolutely did use his sword to trip her up: i absolutely did not.
Ra's: Jason.
Jason: there are no cameras in here, how can you prove anything?
Ra's:
Ra's, sighing: Talia, Jason says he's sorry. ok?
Jason and Talia, simultaneously: i do NOT-/he does NOT-
-
Jason, to Damian: your mother is a whore. slept with my dad once.
Damian, 7: ...i am aware. he is my father also.
Jason: tried to sleep with me once, too.
Damian:
Damian: i did not know about tha- seriously what is wrong with the two of you-
Talia, echoing from down the hall: JASON PETER TODD-AL GHUL IF YOU DON'T STOP TELLING MY SON ABOUT MY PERSONAL HISTORY-
Jason, opening a secret passageway to escape: oki bye-bye Dami enjoy lunch!
Damian, tired and used to this: *waves goodbye*
-bonus, years later-
Bruce: my relationship with Talia was... complicated. but we still held a significant amount of care for each other, and i am grateful she granted me Damian.
Dick: she's a fucking weirdo. i hate her.
Bruce, resigned: yes i'm aware you don't like her but she's still Damian's mother so could you-
Jason, walking in: what we talking about?
Bruce: i'm trying to convince Dick not to antagonise Talia's name around her son.
Jason: oh, Talia? nah fuck her she's a bitch. you know she 'accidentially' decapitated my donkey once during a group trip and fuckin' left me in the desert to travel two weeks back to the compound. asshole. ate all my cookies while i was gone.
Bruce:
Dick:
Dick: FINALLY SOMEBODY FUCKING GETS IT-
who up #notknowing and #beingconfused
why not watch bbc sherlock, we have
gay autistic edgelord who pretends to be a sociopath because he's afraid of his ✨Feelings™✨
Bisexual Disaster
sexy policeman (giles? geoffrey?? georg?? gargamel??? GaNdAlF?????)
slightly more polite edgelord who needs to kidnap people to make them have a chat with him
wholesome soft baby girl who knows a thousand different ways to dissect a dead body
everyone's granny
mary
mary bïtch
Gay flamboyant chaos goblin fueled by obsession, glittering menace, and the deranged glee of making the world burn.
BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER (1997 - 2003) ⏤ 6.05, Life Serial
why does water taste so much better in the middle of the night
We don't talk enough about:
"I'd rather be fighting you anyway", "Mutual"
Because what the fuck. That's like the highest declaration of love between enemies.
I have a grandchild?
navigation , dc navigation
WARNINGS: none really, just funny banter
requests are open
dividers by @cafekitsune
Jason Todd liked to think he wore many masks.
The city knew him as Red Hood. To his brothers, he was the snarky, trigger-happy one. To Bruce, a question mark with a temper. But every Tuesday and Thursday, in a tidy, sun-filled classroom, he was something else entirely:
Mr. Jay.
He taught third grade English Lit. Paperbacks. Book fairs. Glitter-covered essays. Small chairs. Lots of stickers.
And somehow? He loved it.
Jason never expected to find peace in a room full of tiny, chaotic humans, but here he was—"Mister Jay" to twenty-four third-graders at Gotham Academy’s lower school, reading Charlotte’s Web with more expression than he thought humanly possible.
He wore cardigans now. He drank peppermint tea. He even had a bulletin board labeled "Our Word Wall."
And he hadn’t told a soul in his family
Not because he was ashamed—he actually liked it. He liked the simplicity, the structure, the way little Brian Jennings waved at him with both hands every morning and offered him a friendship bracelet made of rainbow rubber bands. He liked the chaos he could understand for once.
“Okay, who can tell me what the monster in Where the Wild Things Are really represents?”
Rory’s hand shot up first—Rory with wild curls, a constant sprinkle of glitter on her cheeks, and a reading level two grades above her age.
Jason grinned. “Hit me, Rory.”
“His FEELINGS. Because Max was MAD and monsters are mad feelings!”
“You nailed it.” Jason gave her a fist bump. “A plus level insight. Someone write that down.”
Rory beamed like she’d just won an Oscar.
It started during the fall parent-teacher conference, when you arrived ten minutes late, breathless and apologetic, your daughter’s glitter-covered backpack slung over your shoulder.
Jason took one look at you—coffee-stained shirt, wild bun, tired eyes and soft voice—and immediately short-circuited.
“Sorry—my car wouldn’t start, and then I had to stop Rory from feeding goldfish crackers to a raccoon.”
Jason blinked. Smiled. “Sounds like a Tuesday.”
“Sorry again,” you huffed, taking a seat. “I’ve had a long day.”
He blinked. “No problem. Uh, Rory’s doing great.”
You sighed in relief. “She talks about you all the time. Mr. Jay says this, Mr. Jay says that. I was starting to think she liked you more than me.”
Jason laughed—and it was a real one, the kind that crept into his ribs and stayed. “Don’t worry, she just likes that I let them write haikus about dragons.”
“Haikus?”
“Very serious educational practice.”
You smiled. Something clicked into place.
It started slow. A cup of coffee after conferences. A chat outside after school pickup. Then, one Saturday, he ran into you and Rory at the Gotham public library. Rory sprinted into his legs, squealing “MISTER JAY!!!” loud enough to startle nearby birds.
That day ended with the three of you at a bakery. Rory passed out with a cookie in her hand. You gave him a look—surprised, amused, softened—and said, “She’s never warmed up to someone like this.”
Jason didn’t say anything. Just wrapped Rory’s scarf tighter and said, “She’s a good kid.”
What he meant was: I’d do anything to keep her happy.
Jason fell hard. Harder than he’d fallen in years. He kept it quiet at first, didn’t want to spook you with his baggage, didn’t want Bruce to send a drone overhead and “investigate” why his second-oldest son was skipping crime fighting for PTA meetings.
He just wanted this one thing for himself.
And somehow, it worked.
You dated quietly. Rory loved him instantly. He helped her with spelling words and listened to her detailed theories about dragons living in Gotham’s sewer systems. He fixed your heater when it broke and always remembered your favorite snacks.
By the time spring rolled around, he was yours, completely.
Jason was...gone. Just absolutely a goner. He’d found a rhythm in the chaos—dinner with you, homework with Rory, bedtime stories, and night patrol. It was weird and messy and full of glitter.
And it was home.
He was there when Rory lost her first tooth. When she scraped her knee on the playground and insisted only Mister Jay could clean it. When she had a nightmare and called him, not you, because "Daddy Jay fights monsters."
He didn’t correct her. Not once.
You saw it—how she clung to him, how he always bent to her level, how she crawled into his lap like it was the safest place on earth.
You asked him once, “You sure you’re okay with this?”
Jason kissed your forehead. “She’s my kid, too. Blood or not.”
So when you had an emergency work trip and your usual babysitter canceled, you didn’t even hesitate.
“You sure you don’t mind watching her overnight?” you asked, handing him a list of instructions and emergency contacts longer than a novel.
Jason kissed your cheek. “She’s my favorite kid. We’re going to build a pillow fort and eat suspicious amounts of mac and cheese. Go save the day. Go save the world, I have this covered.”
You kissed his cheek, hugged Rory tight, and left.
“Alright,” Jason turned to her. “Movie or fort?”
Rory’s eyes sparkled. “BOTH.”
What neither of you accounted for... was Bruce Wayne.
Two hours later, the living room was a pillow apocalypse. Jason wore a glitter crown and had his nails painted purple. Rory was asleep, snuggled in his hoodie, soft snores muffled under a blanket castle.
It started at 6:37 p.m., when Bruce—who was supposed to be on a League mission—showed up at Jason’s apartment.
The door creaked open.
Jason glanced up.
And froze.
Bruce Wayne stood in the doorway.
“I need to talk to you about the armory in Blüdhaven,” Bruce said, standing in the doorway like the world’s most dramatic bat.
“Uh.” Jason didn’t move. “Hey.”
Bruce’s eyes flicked to the bright pink tiara sitting crookedly on his hair. The glitter smearing his cheeks. The empty sippy cup peeking out of his pocket.
Jason, his Jason, was wearing a pink apron that said “Kiss the Cook” and holding a bowl of glitter slime, staring at him dumbfounded. “Now?”
Then Rory ran into the room with a towel-cape tied around her shoulders. “JAY. THE UNICORN IS UNDER ATTACK.” Hew hair wild as if she had woken up by a nightmare.
She froze when she saw Bruce.
Bruce froze when he saw her.
There was a long, loaded silence.
Jason opened his mouth.
Bruce narrowed his eyes. “...Is there something you want to tell me?”
Rory looked up at Jason and whispered, “Is that Batman?”
Jason sighed. “Yeah, that’s Batman.”
“COOL,” she whispered loudly.
“She looks like you,” Bruce said.
“WHAT?!”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Tell you WHAT?!”
“That you have a child.”
“She’s not—! I mean—! I’m babysitting!”
Bruce narrowed his eyes.
“I’m serious! She’s not mine!”
A pause. Then a tiny voice mumbled, “Daddy Jay?”
Jason died.
Bruce looked like he had transcended.
“She calls you—”
“She’s SIX and I READ TO HER. It’s a TITLE OF AFFECTION, not a PATERNITY CLAIM!”
“She has your nose.”
Jason screamed, his arms wildly flailing. “She has a BUTTON NOSE!”
Bruce just stated “I expect pictures at Christmas.”
Rory interrupted cheerfully, “He’s dating my mom!”
Bruce looked like he aged ten years in one second.
“...You’re dating a civilian... with a child… and didn’t tell me?”
“She’s not mine!” Jason repeated, clutching the slime bowl like a lifeline. “I’m just babysitting!”
Rory handed Bruce a plastic tiara. “Do you want to be the princess or the dragon?”
Bruce stared at it. Then at Jason.
Jason shrugged helplessly.
Bruce sighed. “Dragon.”
When you came back the next morning, you were greeted by a sight you would never forget:
Jason, asleep on the couch, Rory curled up beside him like a cat. The apartment was a war zone of glitter, tiaras, and cookie crumbs.
And Bruce Wayne, sitting in a tiny plastic chair at Rory’s tea table, wearing a paper crown and reading a bedtime story.
He looked up at you. “She made me tea.”
You blinked. “Is it real tea?”
“No. It’s glue and glitter water.”
“Ah.”
“She named me Sparkle Dragon.”
You smiled. “Fitting. What happened?”
“Your kid called me Daddy Jay. In front of Bruce.”
You blinked. “Okay. And?”
“He thinks she’s my biological daughter.”
“... Did you correct him?”
Jason stared at you. “She said I have her nose. Bruce believed her.”
You covered your mouth to hide your laugh. “Well... she has told people you’re her ‘real’ dad since February.”
Jason groaned into his hands.
You kissed the top of his head. “It’s okay. Honestly... I don’t mind. You are kind of her dad.”
Jason looked up.
You met his eyes. “You show up. You care. You paint her nails and make dragon haikus and fight the blender when she wants smoothies. That’s more than biology.”
Jason’s chest tightened. Then softened.
“I love you,” he whispered.
You smiled. “Love you more”
Jason opened one eye. “Tell me you brought coffee.”
You laughed. “Only if you tell me why Batman is babysitting my child.”
Jason sighed into the pillow. “Long story.”
Bruce stood. “She’s a good kid.”
“She’s a menace,” Jason mumbled fondly.
Rory woke up and shouted, “GLITTER PANCAKES?”
Idea of Robert wearing prosthetic limb
☆☆💖💗RESIDENT EVIL 4 💗💖☆☆
I think it would be so funny if a reporter accidently overhears one of the waynes insult batman under their breath, and like everyone is just flabbergasted till they realise that these are the Wayne's. Of course they know (and have beef) with batman.
--
Tim, in a interview, trying to explain Wayne stocks or sum idk: well, yk Wayne industries wouldn't have to pay for so many building repairs if fucking batman stopped throwing bane into buildings-
Interviewer: what was that, Mr drake?
Tim: what was what?
Interviewer: right. What do you think Mr Wayne?
Bruce: ...
Bruce: fuck batman.
--
Dick, being bombarded with paperazzi after a kidnapping: oh ffs couldn't batman save me from these snakes too.
Dick: I'm gonna fucking kill him.
Reporters: ???
--
Kid recording a tiktok: hey! Mr Todd! What do you say about the rumors that the Wayne's hate batman?
Jason: huh?
Kid recording, shoving the phone closer to jason: thoughts on batman?
Jason, leaning into to the mic: fuck batman.
--
Someone recording with shaky hands: *Duke Thomas walking out of a private gym, clearly having worked out and looking exhausted*
Duke: fuckass batman, I'm gonna beat his ass.
--
Street kid #2: hey batman! Have you heard what the Wayne's are saying these days?
Batman: *batman noise*
Street kid: do u have a message for Bruce Wayne?
Batman, leaning in: Bruce, say it to my face next time you little bitch.
you've gotta be kind to yourself no matter what
this is twice as true in the winter
the world isn't ending and you don't need to kill yourself it's literally december. it's december. and you need to be nice to yourself.
he needs glasses look at him