Pamela Barnes - The Angel on Dean’s Shoulder
Steve Yokey definitely enjoys irony. Because in an episode called Nihilism nothing was without meaning. 14x10 was more layered than an onion and whilst I would agree with my friends that on a surface level it seems pretty straight forward, every time I have re-watched it I have been struck with some other epiphany or thought at how this beautifully weaved web of an episode is so important for Dean Winchester.
Pamela’s reappearance was one of those threads of silken webbing I have been desperate to unravel and discuss with you. Pamela is the first character we are introduced to in Dean’s head, before we even see the man himself. Solidifying her importance and encouraging us to pay attention. Pamela makes a joke about the end days, and how bittersweet is it knowing that the real Pamela died during them, we are encouraged to remember the events of her life and death in the show. They were all connected to Angels.
The first question to ask is why her? Of all the characters we have met that could be keeping Dean company in his own mind, why is Pam the character chosen? What is significant about Pam?
This is revealed to us not too subtly pretty quickly into the dream sequence. She is psychic. She was always able to break through Dean’s barriers when she was alive and he couldn’t lie to her. In this dream world, she acts as his voice of reason, his guardian. She is the part of him that speaks the truth, the things he cannot say himself.
She was also a key character in his introduction to Castiel and the world of angels. This dream version of Pamela has Castiel all over her:
Her top literally says “to hell and back”. She wears a necklace with obvious wings. Everything about her is calling back to Dean and Cas’s first meeting. She is a call back to Season 4 in herself – a season the writers are telling us to remember right now.
It may only be a short conversation, but this is extremely important:
“I’m heading out for a hot date.”
“How come you always have a boyfriend?”
“How come you only want what you can’t have? Besides you don’t want me. You just like to flirt. I’m psychic so I kinda know.”
To anyone out there still thinking Dean is a ladies man who desperately wants to hook up with all the gorgeous women in his life – I hope you are extremely confused and stay that way until you realise just how wrong you are.
We need to take it at face value that everything Pam says is a truth about Dean - she’s psychic and therefore she knows, so we can’t dismiss her claims.
“How come you only want what you can’t have?” she asks. This being the first truth. Dean wants things he feels that are unattainable to him. (this aligns nicely with the wider dream world and Dean’s constant mantra that this bar is his dream. Sure Jan. This may be a dream for him, but it doesn’t fulfill his wants and desires, those are things he can’t even allow himself in dream worlds. But this discussion is for a different meta).
She then clarifies specifically in relation to herself: “You don’t want me, you just like to flirt.” Also a truth. Dean may have enjoyed flirting with Pam, but he never really desired her romantically. We can also apply this to many other women that Dean has flirted with throughout the show. There has to be an in-universe reason why he’s never ended up with any of them right? This here is the reason. He is a flirt, even with Daphne in Scoobynatural, but he never truly wanted Daphne. Just look at what his mind added to the bar:
Isn’t it kind of sad that even in Dean’s dream he doesn’t allow himself love? That he would parade his rejections in plain sight? Pam has a boyfriend, Daphne has Fred. Or is it really that this Dean is being honest with himself? He never wanted Pam, he never wanted Daphne. The rejections in the bar are his way of reminding himself of this. So what does Dean want? That is what this entire dream sequence boils down to? What does Dean want?
In 14x01 the question “what do you want?” was repeated three times, making it a pattern. Driving it into the audiences mind as a season theme. This episode finally encourages the audience to ask that question of Dean. Unfortunately it doesn’t give us a clear answer. But by putting the question there for the audience to ponder on means it has to be answered at some point. Which is an exciting thing for us.
One thing that was clear, is that as Cas said, Pamela is a complex manifestation used to distract Dean, but she doesn’t give him what he truly wants. Pam speaks the truth in that Dean doesn’t want HER, but she is coded as such that on a subtextual level she is a stand in for Castiel. Castiel who Dean views as unattainable. Castiel who in this dream is out there on a hunt with Sam and not spending time with Dean. Dean stays in the bar waiting for them to return with only Pam for company.
If we peel back the layers we start to see what Dean would prefer. Not Pam, but Cas. Like the Cosmic Cowboy IPA that Dean went to Austin to get apparently, that he knows Sam and Cas will love, because he clearly loves it himself.
There is only one Cosmic Cowboy in Supernatural, the rebel angel who went to hell and back, and gave up his wings for Dean.
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